The Rancher's Southern Belle

by Leanne Burroughs

“Oh. That. Yeah. He wasn’t too pleased. Although it did nt really amount to anything. She and Aaron were already making calves eyes at each other. She turned Bonner down cold. They just stayed friends.”

  “So who is Allie Stone?”

  He shook his head, then scrubbed his hand over his cheek. “Forget I mentioned it.”

  “Oh no you don’t. You do not drop important information like that on me and expect me to forget it.”

  “Not my story, little sis. I have no right to tell you what happened to Allie.”

  “I am due an explanation!”

  “And I am not at liberty to give you one. I’ll admit you need to know, but I cain’t be the one to do so. Luke would never speak to me again—and I’d not blame him.”

  He placed his hand on her back and steered her toward the small black buggy she’d driven to town. So far she’d mastered that much better than she had riding Western style. And the large buckboard was difficult for her to handle.

  “Go home, Maddie. Take your time and drive carefully.”

  “Matt, will you come out and have supper with us? Not tomorrow. Maybe in two nights? I’ll see if I can get Kat and her family to join us, too. Kind of an ‘okay, let us see how much the Reb has learned now’ meal.”

  His answering laughter was rich and deep. “Darlin’, I do love you. I am so glad you married my brother. Despite the circumstances of you two gettin’ hitched, I think you are the best dang thing that ever happened to him.” He lifted her up to the wagon seat in one fluid motion. “And yes, I would love to join you for supper. Now drive carefully on your way home. I heard thunder rumbling earlier. Don’t want you getting caught in a storm.”

  As she moved the horse forward, she left him chuckling in her wake.

  “I’ll see you there,” he shouted.

  Luke sat in one of the rockers on the wrap-around porch, waiting for Maddie to get home. The sun was slowly sinking in the sky. Inside, the mantle clock over the fireplace chimed the hour. Ma had ordered it all the way from Boston and had delighted in every chime.

  He rose when her buggy approached. If she hadn’t gotten home soon, he would have headed out to look for her. His need to be near her was that strong. As was his fear for her safety.

  Wouldn’t that have made Miss Independent happy? He could almost hear her harping about it like she had this morning.

  ‘No, I do not need someone to accompany me, Luke. You need all the men to help on the range right now. You said you had branding to do. Cattle to round up. Said you thought a few were missing. All I am going to do is ride into town, help Matthew with these pies, then head straight back. You bought me a perfectly good buggy. Now let me use it.’

  He’d worried about her all day, although he certainly wouldn’t tell her that. Yes, he’d bought her the small buggy like Doc used so she could get around easily. That didn’t mean he didn’t fret when she was gone.

  Why did she have to be so blasted independent? Oh, deep down he knew she needed him in her own way, but it wasn’t the same as he’d seen with Ma and Pa. And those were his role models. The woman stayed home and took care of the house and family and the man took care of all of them. It’s what a man did. Or at least was supposed to do.

  He couldn’t tell her he loved her, though he’d begun to suspect it was the truth.

  He helped her unhitch the horse and handed it over to one of the men to groom and feed, and then he pushed the buggy inside the barn out of the elements. He’d have to build a small shelter for it. Took up too much space in the barn.

  He reached for her hand and laced his fingers through hers. The scent of her floral cologne—the one Birgit had told him Maddie would love—greeted him like a spring bouquet. He’d missed having her waiting for him when he got home for the day.

  “Were you waiting for me?” Her smile of greeting melted his heart.

  “All my life.” He was becoming too used to having her around. But that was a good thing, right? Maybe so, but he sure wasn’t ready to have his heart trampled. Once in a lifetime was more than enough. He didn’t want to admit it, but he was starting to feel far too much for this woman.

  The only heart in peril was probably his own.

  Stubborn to a fault, she’d slowly but surely wormed her way into his heart. He doubted she’d ever feel the same way about him. He was, after all, a Yankee. Somehow she never let him forget that. A few times she’d actually teased him about it. That had been a pleasant change from her usual solemnness on the subject. Would the dadgummed war always come between them?

  But now that he had her, he wanted the whole shootin’ match. Her body, her heart, her love. He released a deep sigh as they walked in the front door.

  Why wouldn’t Maddie let him take care of her like he wanted to? She had these all-fired notions of helping everyone in the world. And doing it herself.

  She did have a gift for comforting people, a gift that seemed innate to her. After watching her with people of the town, he could no longer dispute that. Why he’d given in and spent money on the dadblamed buggy. She’d probably wring his neck if she knew how much it cost.

  She asserted it was what God wanted her to do. A funny thing coming from a woman who kept insisting she didn’t believe in God anymore. That was definitely an area where Luke was just as stubborn as she was. He believed in God and His salvation with all his heart. And one day he would bring his Maddie back to a loving relationship with her Lord.

  But he wanted her to need him in all things, too. Not just matters of the Lord—even though those were by far the most important.

  The big question was did she need him? Deep down within himself, he knew she did. While she certainly didn’t need him for births or tending of people—like she often did with their ranch hands or had with old Granny Mac the other day—when she was sorely invested like she was with the birthings, she needed him afterward. Emotionally. Like he’d been there for her after Birgit had Lars. Like he hadn’t been there for her after the two Bonner children had been born.

  He still regretted that. She’d needed him. He’d known it. Sensed it. And he’d been too stubborn to do anything about it. Instead he wallowed in his own jealousy and hadn’t only not held her going home, he’d turned his back on her in bed.

  That had been the beginning of the distance between them, and he didn’t know what to do about breeching it. Oh, it was better, but it was still there. Forever hanging between them.

  He’d hurt her.

  He was the worst of fools.

  Maddie warmed up some of the pot roast she’d made the day before. She’d patiently cut up the potatoes, carrots, onion and celery. For her own cooking, without any assistance from Kat or the aunts, Luke could tell she’d been pleased at how well the meal came out.

  “Supper’s delicious again, Darlin’. You did right good with this roast last night. Wasn’t sure how it would turn out you cookin’ it in the oven and all instead of as stew in one of the pots, but I really like it this way. You need to mention it to Kat. Bet Aaron would like it, too.”

  “Well, I had to try out the new stove you ordered for us. It is almost identical to the one Birgit has.” Her eyes met his. “I cannot believe you bought it for me!”

  “Sven helped me order it from that huge catalog he has.”

  Her smile lit her entire face. “Thank you for complimenting the meal. I have to admit I was worried about it, but I was getting tired of stew every night. I wanted to try something different. And I remembered Aggie making it this way once in a while. You and I had it like that in St. Louis once.” She drummed her nails on the table.

  That told him she was nervous about something.

  “How did Matt take to you bringin’ all those pies?”

  She pulled a face. “About as well as I should have expected considering he is a Guylenhall. I swear, the man is as stubborn as you.”

  Luke threw back his head with a mighty laugh. “Sounds like Matt all right. Let me guess. First words out of his mouth were probably, ‘Wha
t am I supposed to do with all these pies?’”

  She kicked him under the table. He didn’t stop laughing.

  After clearing their empty plates from the table, she reached for the handle of the coffeepot. Her hands were shaking. She’d been quieter tonight than usual and he wondered how long he’d have to wait until she told him what was wrong.

  While still facing away from him, she asked softly, “Who was Allie Stone?”

  The breath rushed from Luke’s lungs as the question penetrated his consciousness. Oh, Holy Father in Heaven, she hadn’t just asked him what he thought she had, had she? How could she possibly have heard that name?

  Luke’s heart sank. He stood and walked behind her, turning her to face him. “What did you just say?” His jaw clenched involuntarily.

  She watched him with wary eyes. Looked as scared as a mouse about to be attacked by a field cat.

  “I said, who was Allie Stone?”

  He clenched his fists and strove for control. “Where did you hear that name?” He forced himself to control the tone of his voice. Pain threatened to wash over him like waves crashing against a sea wall. To pull him under the swell and never let him resurface.

  She slipped away from him, inclined her head, and sank back down at the kitchen table. “It does not matter where I heard it. But I think I would like to know the answer to my question.”

  He gulped and swallowed hard against the choking tightness in his throat. Oh, he didn’t want to have this conversation. But he’d known it had been coming. Just hadn’t thought it would be this soon. Although, with his attitude about his nemesis Bonner, what had he expected?

  He crossed to the kitchen window, pushed the curtain aside and looked out. Deep clouds were drifting in and the winds were picking up. Just like the turbulent winds in his soul.

  He blinked away the mists of memory and faced her once again.

  When he spoke again, his voice was low, filled with torment. “She was a girl I grew up with. Lived in town. As a matter of fact, her pa owned the mercantile Swede owns now.”

  Maddie nodded. When he didn’t continue, she said, “And?”

  What did she want from him? To lay his heart open before her? Well, if he wanted her heart, he guessed he had to be honest about his. The words lay bitter on his tongue, but he forced himself to continue.

  “She was the girl I thought I was gonna marry.” He paced the room with long strides, his breath measured.

  Maddie swallowed and her eyes closed. “So she is the girl you are constantly comparing me to?”

  He stilled. What was she talking about? He didn’t compare her to anyone. She was just…Maddie. His wife. And he liked her just the way she was—well, most of the time.

  “No! You are nothing like her.” The words tore from his throat.

  “But you wish I was, right?” She averted her head, blinking furiously.

  Did he? Is that what was wrong between them? He thought a moment, took his time so he could give her an honest answer. He doubted she liked his pause.

  Mindlessly he picked up his tin cup and placed it in the huge bowl filled with water inside the wooden sink. He ran his fingers lightly over the wooden countertop, brushing away a speck of flour. Anything to avoid the one thing he had to do—talk. His throat tightened and his eyes stung.

  “No. I really do not. I swear. She was just…just...” He plopped down in the chair across from her. A bent elbow propped his head up as he massaged his fingertips over his forehead. “Thunderation, this is not easy for me, Maddie.”

  Her words came out barely above a whisper. “It is not easy for me either.”

  No, he could tell it wasn’t. It was probably tearing her up as much as it was him. Her anguished whisper scored claws of grief across his heart. He rose and strolled over to the fireplace, keeping his back to her for a moment, and brushed his fingertips over the clock that had just chimed. He stared at it, then turned around to face her. His breath rang harsh in the hushed house.

  Then did what he didn’t want to do. He swallowed against the lump that suddenly crowded his throat and told her about Allie.

  “Allie and I grew up together. Saw each other in church every Sunday and in school during the week. She was the girl whose pigtails I pulled. The one I mercilessly teased. The first girl I took up into the hay barn and kissed.” His harsh laugh sounded more like a sob.

  Listening with incredulity, Maddie closed her eyes, sensed his pain, his fury. Oh, God, why did I ask him? Am I really ready to hear this?

  A thought struck her. He’s never taken me up in the hay barn and kissed me. Guess I’ll never be good enough to compare to the woman he loved.

  She struggled at the disappointment flooding her heart.

  “We did everythin’ together and soon people began to expect we would get hitched one day. I did, too. The only person that didn’t pay any credence to that was my very best friend—Jeffrey Bonner.”

  Maddie’s eyes flew open. She looked at him, startled. “You and Jeffrey were friends?” She tried to keep her tone gentle.

  Lost in agonizing memories, he nodded as raw anguish covered his face and gave her the briefest of nods. Sorrow and regret for all he’d lost tightened her throat and crushed her heart. Never had she expected that answer. Luke had lost so much.

  But whether he wanted to admit it or not, so had Jeffrey Bonner. Still reeling from the news, she wanted to go to Luke to comfort him, but his body language told her that her touch wouldn’t be welcome.

  She dropped her gaze to the hands she’d twisted in her skirts, blinked a few times and then watched him again.

  “We were. Did everythin’ together as boys. With his folk’s ranch right next to ours, I was either over at his place or he was at ours. Ma thought of him as another son. It broke her heart when…I stopped speakin’ to him.”

  His eyes wandered to the window above the stove, but Maddie doubted he was really looking at anything. Other than maybe the rock he’d brought in the other day.

  “I thought of him as a brother. Probably closer than I was to any of my real brothers.”

  Shocked and saddened, she was afraid to speak. Afraid to trust her own emotions. She pretended a calmness she didn’t feel.

  His hands fisted as memories whirled about him like autumn leaves. Rushed back as if it was yesterday. “All of a sudden Allie started driftin’ away from me. Started spendin’ more time with Jeff. She went to a few church sociables with him. Went to his house for Sunday dinner. You saw the house. It is fancy. While our house was big and lived in, his was always special. What folks hereabouts might have strived for had they had the means to do so. Most didn’t. Ma and Pa did not want to. They liked our home just the way it was.

  “Then…the next thing I knew, she was back in my life. Tryin’ to make it seem that nothin’ was different—but it was. I just did not know how different.”

  He locked eyes with Maddie. “We walked down by the stream one day and Allie asked me to marry her.”

  Maddie’s mouth hung open, then quickly shut.

  “Yep. Proposed to me. Never heard tell of such a thing before. That is a man’s job. Caught me totally by surprise. I almost said yes, but part of me was still smartin’ that she had left me and allowed Jeff to spark her.” He brushed a stray lock of hair off his forehead with shaky fingers.

  “Suddenly, like a blazin’ headline in one of them there big city newspapers from back East, it hit me like an avalanche comin’ down a mountain.” He snorted an unamused laugh and shook his head in self-disgust. “I confronted her about it and she collapsed to the ground. Under normal circumstances her tears would have done me in, but I was too shocked to do much except stare at her.

  “Ma had drilled into all us boys that a lady was to be revered. That we weren’t to take advantage of them.” He looked away. “While Allie and I had certainly done our share of kissin’, and even went a bit further than that at times, we never…did that. I could always hear Ma’s still small voice and I stopped before
we got that far.

  “Seems good old Jeff had no compunctions about finishin’ what he started. Yet when Allie showed up pregnant, he refused to marry her. Told her pa, ‘How do I even know the kid is mine. After all the time she spent with Guylenhall, it could be his whelp just as easy as it could be mine.’”

  Striving for composure, he added, “Of course, I knew that was not possible. As much as I thought I had cared for her, her actions with Jeff were like a slap in the face that she would come runnin’ to me after bein’ with another man. It might not have been the Christian thing for me to do, but I could not get past it and turned her down. Knew she definitely was not the woman I wanted. When I married, I wanted someone that would love only me, not have me worryin’ that any handsome face could sway her.” He studied her, searching her face. Did he really expect to see the answer he wanted there? Hoped for? Prayed for?

  She sat there numb, her eyes never swerving from him.

  Struggling to compose himself, he took deep breaths and exhaled slowly. “Soon after, her pa sold the mercantile to Swede and the family moved away. I never heard from her again.”

  “And you thought I would fall for Jeffrey Bonner just because he is good looking? You really were jealous? Of me?”

  “Why not you? You are beautiful. Cultured. Talented. A delightful woman any man would be proud to call his wife.” He framed the delicate features of her slender face, then dropped his hands and leaned away, continuing to let the reminiscences surface.

  “Most every other woman seems to fall into his bed. Only one that didn’t was Rosemary. She told him straight up that if he wanted her, he was goin’ to have to win her heart. And he would not be playin’ any hanky-panky with her before their weddin’ night. I guess it was the fact she didn’t fall over backwards for him that made him go after her.”

  He raised his head and looked at Maddie again. “Didn’t realize until his great speech that he actually loved her. Yet even if he does, he has been nothin’ but a womanizer ever since they married.”