Hatsukoi

by Hildred Billings

  “Why? Is it hard to do?” Aiko didn’t know anything about technique or even basics, but was it so difficult? Too difficult for even Reina to teach?

  A guffaw, but not much else. “No. It’s not. But this is you.”

  “What’s wrong with me?” Aiko put one hand across her breasts and used the other one to cover her mound. “Is it my mouth shape? My tongue?”

  “God! You are so naïve.” Reina slapped her stomach and then covered her mouth before an inappropriate hoot could come out.

  “Kora!” Aiko shoved her. “I’m trying!”

  “Gomen, gomen.” Reina bit her tongue after she apologized. “Saa, why do you want to do that?”

  Aiko tilted her head, her ponytail grazing the bed sheets. “Because I thought it felt good, so I want to make you feel good?” How can it be more complicated than that?

  Apparently that caught Reina off guard, however, as she steeled herself and dropped her bottom lip. Something calculated inside her head, and when her eyes sparkled again, Aiko figured the computation was complete. “Well, if you insist.” She stroked Aiko’s cheek. “How can I say no to such a pretty lady?”

  Before Aiko could giggle or be otherwise ladylike, Reina had pushed her down onto the bed and enveloped her for a kiss. Any nerves remaining inside her disappeared the moment Reina gave her what she heard her friends call a “deep kiss.”

  She almost forgot what she asked to do, since Reina’s groping and kissing were enough to make any girl lose her motivations. Her tongue is so powerful! Like getting a wet punch to the lips. But then Reina slumped over onto the other side of the bed, drawing Aiko on top of her as if she should know instinctively what to do. She wants me to take charge! How do you dominate somebody like Reina Yamada?

  Yet even on top, she was subservient to Reina’s whims. She pulled Aiko down and kissed her again, rubbing her behind and guiding her hand to the tuft of hair between them.

  She’s so warm. That was Aiko’s first thought as she slid a finger into Reina’s pubic hair. She kissed Reina’s skin, all while concentrating on exploring the vulva of another woman.

  Aiko found the opening between Reina’s legs and pushed a finger down. Ah! It’s so strange! Hot, too. And wet. Wetter the more Aiko probed. Her finger went down as far as it dared, including over a little bump that made Reina gasp when touched. That’s the really good spot. She remembered it well from three days before.

  “You should look at it.”

  After Reina gave a playful tug to her pigtails, Aiko stared down at unfamiliar genitals and wondered what they looked like beneath all the dark hair.

  “Well, go on, before I dry up.”

  Aiko knelt and looked closely at Reina. I see it. The markings of a hole hidden somewhere under that hair, although it looked like a sad pair of sideways lips. They look like a grandfather pouting! Aiko almost laughed, and then took back that thought before she embarrassed them both.

  She ran a hand through Reina’s hair, two fingers edging the lips and pushing them far enough apart for her to see inside. Although Reina’s skin on the outside was a nice dark beige, her flesh inside was a shocking pink in comparison. I love pink. When Aiko moved a finger across the opening, a little trickle of liquid came out. Instincts returned.

  Just do it. Just get in there. Experience her. Aiko eased Reina’s legs further apart and bent her head down.

  The first taste was just a sample, and Aiko swore she felt nothing. Then she licked again, Reina’s flesh bouncing like elastic. The longer Aiko stalled, the more liquid pulsed out of her lover.

  Another stream came out during Aiko’s tentativeness, and she decided then was as good of a time as any to dive in. She pressed her nose into hair and let out a hot breath; Reina’s entire body shuddered. I’m doing it – I’m giving her pleasure. The boost in confidence led Aiko to poke her tongue between Reina’s lips and trail upwards toward that little bump.

  Reina couldn’t contain a high moan. Feeling her melt beneath her mouth made Aiko even more brazen, and she pressed her lips together. She tasted both hair and flesh, and of course the bitter, warm liquid washing over her tongue.

  “Harder.”

  Aiko pushed and inhaled. She moved her tongue to the bump above, every lap another shiver. I’ll make her come like she did me. Aiko extended her teeth and grinded them against Reina’s skin: the response was a long groan, followed by a hand grabbing hair. Lips grew hotter the more Reina’s wetness poured out. Something ran down Aiko’s leg as well.

  This is easy. Perhaps Aiko was a natural-born lesbian. Were this a different type of genital, she wasn’t sure she could perform as well. But Reina was relaxing, supportive. She never chided during the act, and the way her hips would tilt or lift directed Aiko to where she could go. A few weeks ago the mere thought of going down on another woman would have completely disgusted her, but now that she smelled the aroma and had her tongue pushed down into warm, wet flesh, she wanted nothing more than Reina to hump her face.

  Aiko’s body yearned for a similar touch.

  But before she could stop and ask for the same in return, Reina cried out and sliced her nails into Aiko’s scalp, burying her face as far as it could. Aiko choked.

  She pulled away for air as soon as she could, Reina lying motionless, chest panting and forehead sweating. I did that. Aiko wiped her mouth. I’m a sex god!

  Clamoring on top of Reina, she straddled hips and rubbed herself on skin. Her own wetness slipped down her thigh, the hole from whence it came literally aching. I want her. I want her so bad. I want her in… Aiko wondered if she was ready for that.

  “Nee, Reina-chan?”

  She opened one eye. “Un.”

  “It’s my turn.” Aiko kneaded her lover’s shoulders. “I want you to make me feel really good again.” If something doesn’t clobber me between the legs soon, I’ll cry.

  The smirk returned to Reina’s satiated face. “Do you want to come?”

  Aiko stuck out her dirty tongue. “Yes.”

  “Say it.”

  “Say what?”

  Reina’s teeth poked between her lips. “Say you want to come.”

  “Ikitai.”

  As if she had merely dozed, Reina sat up with gentle languidness and drew Aiko’s legs around her so she sat in her lap. Aiko wrapped herself like a vice around Reina’s body, their chests grazing together.

  They kissed, Aiko reveling in the idea of passing Reina’s taste to herself – it worked, for she diverted to lick Aiko’s chin and then nibble her neck. Can she taste herself on me? Having her legs spread around Reina only solved half of her orgasmic problems. She felt unfulfilled.

  Reina must have thought the same thing. “Ai-chan,” she said, her voice a succulent whisper. “I’m going to fuck you.”

  “Good.”

  “No.” Reina leaned against the wall. “I’m going to fuck you.”

  She lifted her cloistered fingers, and Aiko clamped her mouth shut.

  “Don’t you want me inside you?” Reina looked at Aiko’s thighs and snorted. “You’re lubed enough for an entire fist.”

  Aiko hoped she jested. “But…”

  “But what?”

  Maybe I’m still a virgin after all. “But what if I bleed?”

  Eyebrows rose. “Don’t you ride a bicycle?”

  “Of course I do.” Didn’t everyone?

  “Well, then I doubt you’ll bleed. Especially from my fingers. If you had one of those things then you probably lost it a long time ago. And…” Reina pushed a loose strand of hair away from Aiko’s forehead. “I don’t give a shit if you bleed. It’s not like these are my sheets to clean.”

  Aiko threw herself forward and kissed Reina with the ingemination of a woodpecker. “Ii no yo!” she cried. “Please! Do it!”

  “Okay!” Reina grabbed Aiko and kissed her for a long time, their lips and tongues held together in one breath. Calmness coursed through Aiko’s body.

  Reina’s free arm wrapped around Aiko’s hips, supporting
her. That same finger dove into Aiko’s wetness, rolling around her labia until stroking that one sweet spot just enough to make her whimper and give up more. “You get wet so easily, Ai-chan.”

  “Not as easily as you.”

  Before Aiko could grin at her own snark, Reina bested her by shoving a whole finger in. Aiko’s eyes widened, the sensation of something inside her dictating her senses. Now there was a little fullness. And it was gratifying.

  Reina pulled it out again. Aiko wanted to pout and protest. Get that thing inside me, now. Reina obliged and coaxed her finger inside again, this time accompanied with another. Fullness multiplied.

  And then out again.

  “Pick one.” Aiko’s level of exasperation surprised her.

  “Do you want them inside? Do you want me to fuck you?”

  “Yes!”

  “Yes, what?”

  Their eyes locked together, but Aiko didn’t intend to lose this battle of the perverted minds. “Irete.” Her command had come from the throat. “Irete! Irete…ah!”

  Aiko didn’t understand true fucking until the moment Reina shoved three fingers in. She pulled them out again, halfway, and then up again. Down, up, down, up – like little springs immersing themselves in Aiko’s sex.

  Clinging to Reina, she attempted to help by thrusting. It took a few tries until they found a mutual rhythm, and when Aiko next looked down she saw her nails had drawn a little blood on Reina’s shoulder. Yes, fuck me, yes!

  Was this how good it could feel? It felt just as good as the last time they had sex, but in a different way – a more primal way. The more Reina fucked her, the more Aiko heard the sounds of wet and skin slapping together, and never in a million years would she have thought it could sound erotic. She was so wet she probably could have taken Reina’s entire hand, but for right now three long fingers worked. Well, maybe some adjustments could be made.

  “Fukaku!”

  She fucked her deeper.

  “Hayaku!”

  She fucked her faster.

  “Motto!”

  Aiko’s arms dropped and she flung them behind her, bracing herself on upper body strength alone. Too much. Between her chest tingling and her pelvis bumping Reina’s other hand, Aiko knew she was about to die. No, not die. I’m more alive than ever. She swore her…dare she say it, pussy, was made for someone like Reina to play with.

  And it felt so, so good.

  Aiko didn’t think it could ever stop feeling good. I’ll fuck her here forever. But then she saw herself at the bottom of that hill again, dashing up until a white light blinded her and she toppled backwards. Reina was trapped inside her, Aiko’s body clamped down and imploding.

  She didn’t want Reina’s fingers to fuck anymore, so they didn’t. They stilled inside Aiko as she rode the crest of her orgasm, her arms buckling and her body crashing to the bed. Reina followed, fingers still inside. Aiko watched her own uncontrollable legs shake, her toes wrestling each other as her chest gasped for air.

  When she finished her high and came back to reality, Reina was still inside her, grinning. “I told you I’d fuck you.”

  Aiko said nothing and attempted to close her legs, prompting Reina to pull away and cross her arms. I have no idea what just happened. Aiko wrapped her arms beneath her legs and watched Reina fidget with a cigarette. No cuddling that day.

  “You sure?” Reina held her lit cigarette out.

  Shaking her head, Aiko looked at the clock.

  Reina must have followed, for she said, “Maa. Ten minutes. I guess we should get cleaned up and get out of here.” She put the cigarette in her mouth and blew smoke from her nostrils. “One hour isn’t any fun.”

  They took turns in the bathroom, where Aiko attempted to make herself presentable. She tore around the hotel room, looking for her clothing, and found her bra draped on a wall sconce. Reina was already dressed and ready by the time Aiko pulled herself together, and they walked out into the hallway, hand in tepid hand.

  Aiko squeezed Reina’s and offered a kiss on the cheek when they reached the elevator. “Thanks for today, again.”

  The doors parted and they walked inside. “What’s there to thank me for? You make me sound like an escort.”

  “What? No!” Aiko gripped Reina’s arm. “I would never suggest that. I just mean…” Her muscles relaxed as the elevator descended. “Well, it’s something one would say to their girlfriend, yes?” She was never sure what she wanted in the long term from Reina, but she remained hopeful…about something.

  The word for “girlfriend” Aiko had used insinuated something more than their casual relationship. When she said it, Reina glared at her, and said, “What’s that? Look, we’re not like that.” She shook Aiko off her arm. “We’re just dating. We’re not girlfriends.”

  Although Aiko knew that truth in her heart, she still wished…had remained hopeful…she didn’t know. “I’m sorry.” Her hand stung from when Reina pushed it away.

  “Look, I still have sex with other women right now, okay?” The elevator doors opened, but Reina’s frown did not disappear. She pulled out their room key and deposited it in the container by the front desk.

  “Yes, I know.” Aiko was still in denial about it, though. Not pleasant to think about one’s lover fooling around with other women, especially now that she knew exactly how Reina operated in the bedroom. Just imaging her teasing another girl in the ear while rubbing her private areas rose hackles inside Aiko she hadn’t felt since indignities on the playground during kindergarten. “I’m not ignorant. I know what kind of woman you are.”

  Reina stopped walking, standing in the front entrance as if Aiko’s words had just smacked her in the back of the head. “And what kind of woman am I?” Reina turned, her arms still barricading her body from Aiko’s affections.

  Oh, no. What have I done? She didn’t mean to upset Reina. “You just…are a free spirit?” That’s what her parents had called those of the “free love” era, right? “You like to sleep with women. More than one. I understand. For all you know, I could become the same way.”

  Reina went from imposing to confused in less than two seconds. “What? Ha!” She slapped her chest with another chortle. “You! Like me! I could see it now!”

  They held hands again as they went outside, Aiko attempting to not let Reina’s words hurt her. I could be. I could be just like her. She imagined herself strutting into bars and dragging women off to love hotels for sex. Huh. That sounds like it could get expensive. Or maybe she would haul them off to bathrooms for anonymous sex. That’s dangerous! But maybe, if she considered herself a lesbian now, that was what she would have to do with the rest of her life.

  She poked Reina in the arm as they crawled down the sidewalk, the afternoon still too early to end the date but the both of them penniless to do anything else. “Are you really having sex with other women still? Or are you just saying that you would?”

  Reina did not look at Aiko – her hand lessened its hold. “I have.”

  “Oh.” Something clunked inside Aiko. “But I’m the only one you’re dating, right?”

  “Yes, when you phrase it that way.”

  Aiko had to settle for that. She may be having sex with other women, but it’s me she takes other time for. She purposefully left out Michiko, and any other lesbian women Reina may have been good friends with. Too much baggage in that thought terminal.

  Because of the new year popping up around the world, Reina didn’t see Aiko again for over a week. They did talk on the phone a couple times, but Aiko’s end was so coded due to having her mother hover around; it both annoyed and washed right over Reina, who would have cared more if she were the type of person to get hung up over somebody else.

  Thanks to those same holidays, however, she had time off work. The double-edged sword appeared when she had nothing else to do, since her home life was a bust, her friends were busy with their families, and the usual hang out spots were closed. Reina holed herself up in her room while her mother attempted to
clean for the new year.

  Left with nothing but her stereo, some old comic books, and a desk to keep her occupied, Reina put on a CD and attempted to read a naughty novel under her futon covers. That ended quickly, since she didn’t get anything useful from sexy materials. So she sat at her desk and looked through her New Year’s postcards from distant relatives and closer friends. On top was Michiko’s, written with a foreigner’s hand; on the bottom was Aiko’s, written in calligraphy.

  She would be traditional like that. Reina flipped the card over and studied Aiko’s brush strokes. The characters spelled out, “Happiness to You on The Dawn of a New Year,” and below the final loop was a smaller message: “I hope the new year brings you many more meetings.” Aiko had signed her name in bold, red ink with a heart on the end. The characters making up her name, “Love” and “Child,” made Reina think she was dating a ten-year-old. She looked at her own name on the card and realized it was written in the phonetic alphabet.

  She doesn’t know the characters for my name. For the best. Reina’s characters weren’t usual, so seeing her name written phonetically was better than seeing it written with the incorrect kanji. Yet it reminded her that she and Aiko still knew so little about each other.

  Then again, Reina hadn’t sent New Year’s postcards to anyone.

  No point keeping cards cluttering her desk – Reina opened a drawer to shove the cards into and got another unhelpful reminder. Glaring back at her was her unfinished letter to Michiko, attempting to explain the feelings even Reina herself couldn’t understand. She pulled it out and dissected the words, her hand reaching out to grab the nearest pencil.

  To Michiko,

  We have known each other for over five years now. You are my best friend. You are the only person I feel I can be both myself around and still be accepted. You never judge me for anything. You know all the vulnerable pieces of me. You are…

  Reina bent the edge of the stationery. What was she even trying to say?

  Love. Reina knew the concept, but wasn’t sure she understood it. What was love? What did it matter to her? The only things she knew about love were what the movies told her, and that same sort of “love” never translated to the real world. Girls who told Reina they loved her one day ran off with a guy the next, saying the same thing. Maybe “love” was just something to frivolously say. If that was the case, then Reina had no business being so disrespectful to somebody she cared for.