Natasha's Awakening

by J. a Melville

  “I’m fine Eric, I just want to get out of here.” Natasha fought hard to not let Eric see how she really felt. His eyes searched her face for a few moments more, but she had wiped her face clear of all emotion and the look she gave him showed nothing of the turmoil going on inside of her.

  It was a relief when Eric took her hand and after paying the bill, he walked them outside to where the limo waited for them. Natasha didn’t even notice the views of the city skyline, she was just feeling too miserable to care.

  Eric opened the rear door on the limo and she climbed inside, sliding right across to the far side of the seat, not turning her head to watch him as he hopped in alongside of her, as she normally would have done. When the car finally pulled away from the restaurant, Natasha breathed a sigh of relief. Her heart was still aching horribly and she felt ill but she was glad to turn her back on that restaurant and she knew, without a doubt, that she’d never want to set foot inside that place ever again.

  Chapter 29.

  Natasha was quiet on the drive back to the hotel. She could see out of the corner of her eye that Eric was constantly looking over at her, his look filled with concern but she tried to ignore him, not wanting to get into anything with him in the car.

  On the ride up in the elevator, she leaned against the back wall, her eyes following the numbers as they lit up for each floor, determined not to make eye contact with Eric in case she burst into tears.

  He unlocked the door to their suite and stepped aside to let Natasha walk in ahead of him. He went straight to the bar, pouring himself a scotch and adding ice from the freezer before turning to watch as Natasha removed her shoes and padded barefoot on the carpet, to sit down on the lounge.

  “Alright baby, talk to me. I know something is wrong and don’t you try and tell me everything is fine.” Eric came over to sit down alongside of her.

  “It’s Vivian, what she said.” Natasha’s voice was so low, Eric had to lean closer to hear her. “When I went to the bathroom, she came in and she told me a few things that upset me.”

  She felt Eric stiffen beside her. He sighed, a long drawn out sigh. “What did that bitch say to you baby.” He asked his voice gentle.

  “She told me that you would get bored with me, that I don’t have enough sexual experience to hold someone of your needs. She said that you two had a great sex life and that you didn’t dump her, she dumped you because you got too possessive.” Natasha’s eyes moved to Eric’s to try and gauge his reaction to what she was telling him.

  His face was filled with a slow burning rage. “Fuck that bitch.” Eric got up from the lounge to kneel in front of Natasha, parting her legs so he could crouch between her knees. He took her hands in his which were cold to his touch. “Baby please, don’t do this. Vivian is lying. Can’t you see she’s just trying to cause problems for us? She didn’t take it very well at all when I called it off with her. She kept ringing me for days afterwards until I changed my mobile number just to try and get her to leave me alone. Sweetheart, I love you. You’re the only woman I’ve ever loved and the only woman I’ll ever want.”

  Natasha said nothing, just stared at Eric as he pleaded with her. “She just sounded so convincing Eric and to be honest a lot of what she said made sense to me. I’ve wondered myself why you chose me when I’m not one of your usual model type girlfriends. I do worry that I’m not interesting enough in bed for you when you’re so much more experienced than I am and I still do wonder why you married me. A man doesn’t have to marry the woman he gets pregnant anymore. Times have changed.”

  Eric responded with a long stream of swearing. “Dammit it Natasha, I’m going to say this only once and then I don’t want to waste any more time talking about that heartless, soulless bitch, ok?” He looked at her waiting for a response and Natasha nodded.

  He raised her hands to his lips, dropping kiss after kiss over her palms and wrists before he finally lifted his head and turned his intense blue eyes on hers. “Sweetheart, I love you, only you. I admit when I first suggested we have that week away I had only intended for it to be that week and then it would be over. I’ve never done the happily ever after thing. I’d never met a woman I wanted to do the happily ever after thing with until you, but then somewhere over that week, I think when I came back from that meeting I couldn’t get out of, and found you gone, I panicked. I thought you’d gone at first until I realised all your things were still here and then I got mad because you’d gone out like you didn’t care that I wasn’t here.” Natasha’s mouth opened as she went to respond to his comment, but Eric raised his hand to silence her. “Let me finish, please baby.” He kissed her hands again to soften his order a little. “By the time you got back to the hotel that day I’d worked myself up into quite a state and I went nuts when I saw you. It was anger, relief and as you know, it got out of hand very quickly and that’s where for the first time ever, I forgot all about a condom. Think about it baby. If that bitch Vivian was so hot, how come I never forgot about a condom with her?” Eric shuddered. “God, I couldn’t think of anything worse than her carrying my child. Well, she wouldn’t, she’d have had an abortion for sure. All she cares about is herself and how she looks. No way would she risk a pregnancy that could destroy her body. That’s how she would look at it anyway. You can trust me baby, that if the worst had ever happened and Vivian had fallen pregnant with my child, no way in hell would I have married her. Please believe me, I didn’t marry you because you got pregnant. I couldn’t marry a woman I didn’t love no matter the circumstances and I am aware of the times sweetheart. I know a man and woman don’t need to do the shotgun wedding anymore.”

  Natasha listened to Eric, but she still had to say what was going through her mind. “You wanted me to have an abortion though Eric, remember? You were so determined to not become a father.”

  “You know why though baby. You know how scared I was. I was so convinced I’d make a terrible father, that I’d be the same way my own father was with me and I wouldn’t want any child to have to grow up feeling so unwanted and hated by their father as I did. I’m still scared Natasha, I’m still terrified that I’ll be a bad father, but I can promise you that I will try to be the best father I can possibly be.” He dropped his head into Natasha’s lap before continuing.

  “Please baby, please listen to me, don’t let Vivian poison our marriage. I love you, god I love you so much. I hate what she’s done to you, the doubt I see in your eyes now. She dares to tell you that you won’t be able to hold my interest, that you’re not the kind of woman that I normally feel attracted to and that you won’t be able to satisfy me in bed? Dammit, think about that. The reason I’ve never gone out with a woman like you before is because I never wanted to put my heart at risk of being broken baby. Those other women, ones like Vivian served a purpose, but I could never have fallen for women like them. I used them for my own purposes, I admit that, but they didn’t exactly walk into the relationship with their eyes closed, they knew what they were getting. They got everything they needed, all that shallow, self centred women like them wanted. They got my money, gifts and dare I say it, the publicity but you were different. You’ve never shown any interest in my money. You’ve never asked me for anything baby.”

  Eric lifted his head to give her a tiny smile. “I knew I was in trouble during our week here sweetheart. I was reeling from you giving me your virginity, feeling overwhelmed by the sex, because despite what Vivian tried to make you believe, the sex between you and I is the most exciting, most intense of my entire life. I can never seem to get enough of you. No matter how many times we make love, I’m thinking about sex with you again, and then I want you all over again. You turn me on in a way no other woman has ever been able to do, but it’s not just sex. I can’t wait to get home from work to just be with you. I love it when you get sassy and tell me off, I love that you stand up to me, I love everything about you baby. You think that Vivian is more attractive than you?” And Eric snorted with disgust. “That bitch is nothing mor
e than an empty shell that is a walking advertisement for her plastic surgeon. Hell, I don’t even know what’s real on her anymore. She eats like a bird, constantly worried about her weight, her appearance, but she is too shallow to realise that it’s pointless having a nice cover on your book if the story inside is dull and boring. Vivian bored the crap out of me baby. Please believe me when I say that she means nothing to me, nothing at all and I’m pissed off that we’re giving that bitch so much of our time now.”

  Natasha looked down at Eric’s head as it lay in her lap and slowly her hand went out, her fingers brushing lightly over his hair. He had never poured out his soul in the way that he was now, ever. She was starting to feel that spark of hope that what he was saying to her was the truth.

  At her light touch on his hair, Eric raised his head. His eyes moved slowly over her face. “You are so beautiful sweetheart. You are a true beauty, beautiful on the outside, and beautiful on the inside. You have a big heart and when you look at me with those gorgeous loving eyes of yours, you make me feel like everything is going to be alright. You are smart and witty and everyone loves you. Trust me, Alice has met some of my ex girlfriends, and she’s never given a damn about any of them but you, well, she loves you. I never introduced Alice and Vivian though. Vivian doesn’t play well with others as you’ve probably worked out. I couldn’t have her belittling Alice. She tends to treat my staff like they’re the dirt on the soles of her shoes and I won’t have them exposed to that level of disrespect.”

  Eric’s lips travelled over Natasha’s palms again and his eyes searched hers. “Please say something baby. Please tell me that you’re not going to let Vivian come between us. I can’t lose you ever, but I can’t fucking lose you because she’s poisoned your mind. God, Natasha, speak, tell me it’s ok, that we’re ok.”

  She watched as his eyes became moist with his emotional plea to her but still she said nothing, just watched him, until he finally dropped his head back in her lap and his arms closed around her legs, hanging onto her with a firm grip.

  As she gazed down at Eric’s head as he lay with his face buried in her lap, she could see the faint tremor running through his body and after a while Natasha realised that the skin on her thighs was getting wet and her heart skipped a beat, then began to thump heavily in her chest.

  Realization dawned. “Oh god.” She whispered. Eric was crying. His tears falling silently as he tried to hold himself under tight control, but he couldn’t stop the moisture dampening her legs as he kneeled before her, with his head buried in her lap.

  “Oh god, what am I doing?” She whispered. Eric was right, she was doing exactly what Vivian would have wanted to have happen. She was successfully driving a wedge between Eric and herself and if she continued to allow that woman’s words to colour her judgment, then Vivian would win and she would destroy their marriage.

  “Eric?” She said softly. “I love you, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry that I listened to Vivian, that I gave her even a moment of my time. I believe you. Please Eric, look at me.” She tugged lightly on his hair.

  Slowly his head came up and when Natasha saw his face, the dispair in his eyes and the dampness from his tears on his cheeks, her heart ached. “Oh Eric, my gorgeous, sexy husband, I love you, don’t cry, you make my heart hurt when I see you in pain.” She reached out to caress his cheek, using her thumb to wipe away the tears that still made their way down his face. “What are we going to do about Vivian though Eric? I get the impression she’s not going to let up until she drives us apart. She was so angry, so cruel and god, but she was enjoying trying to hurt me and I admit, I gave in to my insecurities. She knew exactly which buttons to push. I meant what I said, I still can’t believe that you chose me and I guess, just a few words from a scorned woman and I was ready to let all my insecurities take over again. I’m sorry.”

  A look of relief came over Eric’s face and he gave her that slow sexy smile that always made her heart flutter. “If she makes any attempt to contact either of us again baby, I’ll take out a restraining order on her. I don’t trust her Natasha. I’m frightened she’ll come after you, maybe try and harm you and our babies and if she dares to lay even one finger on you, I’ll kill her.” His face looked menacing and even Natasha shivered. The anger flashing in his eyes was something she hoped to never have directed at her.

  “I’m serious Natasha. I haven’t heard from Vivian for a while but then she said she’s been out of the country the last couple of months, so that might be why she’s been quiet. I thought she’d finally given up. I dumped her because apart from being so cold, she was showing signs of cruelty and a nasty side of herself that turned me right off. It got to the point where I couldn’t even pretend to want her sexually and when I called it off with her, I thought she’d taken it alright, but going by what she said to you last night, I was wrong. I’m worried she’s not finished baby, that she might target you to try and work on your insecurities. I’ve no doubt she’d like to see us fall apart.”

  “You don’t think she’d do anything though Eric, do you? She’s not dangerous, just a jealous, jilted woman?”

  “I don’t know baby. How does the saying go? Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned? You’ll be fine at home. Vivian doesn’t know where I live. I’ve told you before, that past girlfriends were taken to my apartment in the city. I wasn’t interested in them possibly turning up at my door.”

  “Do you think we could stop talking about Vivian now?” Natasha asked. “I want to change out of these clothes but first can you just hold me?”

  “Best suggestions of the night baby. Holding you and not wasting another moment talking about my ex.”

  Eric stood and pulled Natasha to her feet and into his arms. They stood like that for a while, wrapped in each other’s arms, her head on his shoulder and they both pulled back slightly when Erica and Nathaniel gave them a not so gentle reminder of their presence.

  “How about we go to bed baby? I’m not talking about sex, I just want to hold you in my arms. We can talk, do nothing, you can sleep, whatever you want.”

  “Sounds perfect Eric. Although if you’re too tired for sex, maybe I should have brought the Jack Rabbit with me.” She teased. Natasha waited to see the reaction on his face and he didn’t disappoint.

  Eric’s face darkened. “There will be no Jack Rabbit baby. I’ve told you this before. The only time that damned vibrator goes anywhere near you will be when I’m in control of it.”

  Natasha grinned at him and with a dramatic roll of her eyes, she headed for the bedroom. She slipped off her dress, laying it over one of the chairs and in just her strapless bra and lacy panties, she closed herself in the bathroom to brush her teeth and remove the pins from her hair, brushing it until it fell in loose curls down her back.

  When she stepped back out of the bathroom Eric was already in bed, propped up against the bedhead, reading the newspaper. “Let me guess? The stock market?” Natasha questioned and Eric grinned, but said nothing. “Damn Mr Rothman, if you’re going to read the stock market, then that’s going to be like a lullaby for me. I’ll be asleep in two minutes.”

  Eric snorted. “Very funny baby, but don’t forget, that stock market that you sneer at helps keep us in the lifestyle we’re enjoying now.”

  Natasha responded by sticking her tongue out at him and he chuckled. “Well you just keep reading your stock market reports then Mr CEO.” And she turned presenting him with her back.

  Slowly Natasha popped the clasp on her bra and threw it on the chair then she hooked her panties and slid them down over her hips, thighs and when they slipped around her ankles, she stepped out of them. She looked over her shoulder to see what Eric was doing, but he was still buried in his newspaper and Natasha couldn’t help feeling slightly irritated that he wasn’t paying attention to her mini strip tease.

  Once she was naked Natasha walked to the bed and climbed in, flopping down under the sheets, her back to Eric. That tiny voice in her head recalled Vivian’s words from e
arlier about him losing interest in her and she hated that Eric’s ex girlfriend had the power to make her question things now, that she wouldn’t have questioned before.

  She felt the bed shift behind her and Eric’s lips landed on her shoulder, trailing kisses up the side of her neck. “Nice little performance you put on baby.” He spoke softly in her ear.

  She turned her head towards him in surprise. So he’d seen her striptease. “You were busy with your paper.” She pointed out and he laughed.

  “Seriously baby. Do you honestly believe that when confronted with my gorgeous wife getting naked or the stock market and you know how much I love the stock market, but my wife getting naked is going to win every time. How could you even doubt that?” He asked and he shifted his body until he was pressed up against the back of her with his erection wedged firmly against her buttocks.

  “Damn you Eric, you were teasing me?” Natasha slapped him on the leg he’d thrown over hers.

  “If you hit me again baby, I’m going to have to punish you and you should know that when I say that, I bloody well mean it.” He warned her, nipping her bare shoulder with his teeth.

  “You can’t hurt a pregnant woman Mr CEO.” Natasha’s look was smug.

  “Who said I was going to hurt you baby.” He responded. “I’ll make you scream, but it won’t be from pain.”

  At his words Natasha felt her insides melt. She wiggled brushing her buttocks up against Eric’s erection and he groaned. He pushed a hand between her legs and his fingers pressed into her finding her already wet. “You are such a hussy baby.” Natasha could hear the humour in his voice.

  “Only for you.” She whispered. Eric bent his head to kiss her and for a while their lips moved hungrily against one another. Natasha tried to roll onto her back to give her better access to his lips but he held her on her side and his hands roamed over her body, teasing her nipples into hard peaks and one hand moved between her legs, teasing her clitoris until it was swollen and sensitive. He delved into her soaked entrance and she moaned, pushing back against him, wanting to feel him inside her.