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Accidental Lies: An unputdownable, steamy, sexy contemporary romance novel

Page 18

by Mason, Dana


  I pour my mother a glass of wine and hand it across the bar to her. She gets up out of her chair. “I almost forgot. I brought you something.”

  She goes back into the living room but I keep working on dinner since it’s getting so late. When she returns, she’s carrying a huge scrapbook. My heart sinks. Please don’t tell me she’s brought baby pictures. Jesus. It’s as if she knew I had a man here.

  “Mom, what are you doing?”

  “I made this for you and I made one for Mackensey. It’s a scrapbook with all the photos I had of your dad.”

  “Oh, wow, Mom, that was nice.”

  She sits at the table this time instead of the bar and shifts the book so that she and Drew can look at it together. I keep working in the kitchen, fighting the urge to walk over and join them.

  “He’s a musician?” Drew asks.

  Mom stops midway through turning the page. “Well, at least I know she didn’t tell you about him either.”

  I roll my eyes and say, “He passed about ten years ago.”

  “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize…”

  I drop my shoulders with a sigh. “We weren’t that close. Mac and I were raised by my mom.”

  My mother bounces slightly in her chair. “He traveled a lot, but he loved you two so much.”

  “Yeah, I’m sure he did.” I think about that, trying to remember spending time with him as a kid. He was always the coolest guy in my eyes. I loved him so much and I was always in such awe of him. Of course, now, as an adult, I realize he wasn’t that cool. He was just an absent father.

  My brain immediately stalls on the fact that I’m pretty damn sure I’m pregnant. I glance up at Drew and wonder how on earth this is going to turn out. Will he be there every day for our child, or will he be an absent father too? I drop my chin and close my eyes. God, I hope not. I don’t want that for my life or for my baby. I don’t want to be my mother, always making excuses for my child’s father. Always trying to be both mother and father.

  I loved my dad, I really did, but my memories of him are clouded in a fog of disappointment and regret. I spent most of my life missing him and wishing he’d surprise me and show up out of the blue. He did… sometimes, but not very often.

  I catch snapshots of their conversation as I’m cooking. My mom is telling Drew how she met my dad. How he left us to tour the country with his band. They didn’t marry—because my father didn’t believe in marriage. I remember what she went through with him. She tried moving on, she tried seeing other people, but she never stopped loving my dad. When he’d come back to town, she’d drop everything for him—then he’d just turn around and leave again a few weeks later. As I’m listening to her story, all I can think about is how I have to take a pregnancy test tomorrow… and how much that’s potentially going to change my life.

  “He toured with his band every year so we didn’t get to see him that much,” my mom explains. “He called pretty regularly though.”

  I want to make a snarky comment about how often he really did call, but I don’t bother. The man is dead, I don’t need to rehash the past. I pick up the salad bowl and walk over and place it on the table. I lean in to see the photos and my heart skips when it lands on a particularly great picture of my dad on stage. His long hair is all over the place and he’s smiling so wide.

  “At least he was happy,” I mumble.

  Drew points to the photo. “You look like him.”

  “Yeah, I do, don’t I?” I stare down, trying to remember the last time I looked at a photo of my father. I glance around the house and realize I don’t have any pictures of him displayed.

  “Thank you, Mom. This is such a great gift.”

  “You’re welcome. I didn’t see any point in holding onto them so I made copies for both of you and put these books together.”

  “Mac’s going to love it too.”

  “Wait, is Mac’s first name Mackensey?” Drew asks with a puzzled expression.

  “Yes.” My mom nods and says, “Mackensey Thomas. We gave him my last name as his first name and then his dad’s last name, Thomas. We both thought it had a nice ring to it.”

  Mom flips the page and the first thing I see is my father holding me as a newborn baby. For me it hits so close to home that my eyes instantly tear up. I realize that’s another thing my child won’t have: my dad as a grandfather. Am I crazy for bringing a child into this weird, unsettled situation? Is it a mistake? My hand drops to my stomach at the thought and I know, deep down, that if I’m pregnant, it’s not a mistake. Drew and I are magical together. We really fit, and while I’m not sure what his reaction is going to be when I tell him, I know the connection we share is real. It’s tangible and beautiful, even if it doesn’t last forever.

  I look over at my mother with a new understanding. I lean down and kiss the top of her head before walking into the kitchen. I get it now. I see why she always defended my dad when he wasn’t there for us. Why she always made excuses for him while we were growing up. Why she wasn’t resentful about being a single mother. Without my father, Mac and I wouldn’t be who we are. Without their relationship, her life would be completely different. If I know anything about my mother, it’s that she loves her life and she loves her kids. I’ve never doubted that. If she considers her relationship with my dad as beautiful as I consider my relationship with Drew, then I understand. And just as she felt about me and Mac, there’s no way I can’t regret—much less question—bringing our child into this world, with or without him.

  When we sit down to eat, I let Drew tell my mom the story of how we met. I’m grateful when he leaves out the part about me getting drunk and him putting me to bed.

  My mom loves it when Drew tells her about how I corrected the bellman when he called me “ma’am”. I smile too; it’s hard not to when I see Drew’s dimples and I’m reminded of how hot he looked in his aloha shirt and flip-flops. Besides that, I’m not such a snob that I can’t laugh at myself. Drew reaches across the table and lays a hand on my arm before saying, “It was a great week.”

  Mom’s face brightens and she beams at me. “Oh, honey, I’m so glad.” She glances at Drew, her expression thankful. “I’m so happy you were there and you two met—and what a coincidence that you live so close.”

  Drew’s eyes lock on mine. “I’m glad too.” When he says this, a warmth spreads through me. I’m as thrilled about it as Mom is. I couldn’t have asked for more… and to think, I almost screwed it up. I just pray this is still where he wants to be once I share the news.

  When we’ve finished eating, my mom heads off to the shower so Drew and I take advantage of our alone time and curl up on the couch for a while.

  “Shouldn’t we work on cleaning the kitchen?” he offers.

  “No, I’ll take care of it later.” I rest against him and apologize. “I’m so sorry about tonight. I meant for this to be a quiet evening with just the two of us. I had no idea she was coming.”

  “Hey, it’s okay. She’s great. I don’t mind at all.”

  I suck air through my teeth and say, “Unfortunately…”

  “I can’t spend the night.” He finishes for me.

  I shake my head with a mock frown. “I’m sorry.”

  “That’s perfectly all right. It seems like she needs some time with you anyway.”

  “Yeah, I got that feeling too.”

  “Tomorrow night?” he asks. “If she really is going to Mac’s house?”

  “Oh, she is. He has a beautiful guest room made up for her all the time. She rarely stays here.”

  Drew leans in and rests his forehead against mine. “I’m not sure how I’m going to sleep without you tonight.”

  “I know. I’m going to miss you too.”

  Then he pulls back just enough for the light to catch the glowing, golden flecks in his eyes. “Hey, I wanted to ask, this ceremony on Saturday… I have something planned, but if you need me, I can be there for you.” He pauses, his expression turning thoughtful. “It sounds like it mig
ht be difficult for you.”

  I shake my head. As much as I appreciate the gesture, I really don’t need him there. “No, but thank you. I’ll be fine. It’s not a big deal.”

  His eyes narrow. “You’re sure?”

  I place a gentle kiss on his lips and as I do so, my stomach does a little flip. He’s so great and as much as I want to share everything with Drew, I’m not sure a ceremony honoring my late husband is the right place for him.

  Twenty-Eight

  Emily

  When I hear Rebecca climb the stairs, my stomach does a somersault. We both agreed to come in early, so we’re alone in the office to do the pregnancy test. But I’m not ready. Last night I felt sure I could handle this. I felt sure I wanted this, but now, now that I’m faced with finding out for sure… I don’t feel ready.

  I know in my heart that I’m not ready to share this news with Drew yet… my pulse skips when this thought crosses my mind. I know I can’t hide it, but I’m not prepared for the rejection if he’s not interested in being a father.

  “Good morning,” Rebecca chants from the hall. “How are we feeling this morning?”

  Another stomach dip.

  “Sick.”

  “Oh, come on, Emily. Everything’s going to be fine.” I hear her office door creak open and a moment later, she’s in my office with a small white paper bag.

  I groan and drop my head to my desk.

  “I take it this means your period still hasn’t come.”

  I turn my head from side to side. “Bec…” It comes out like a whine. I lift my head to meet her eyes and say, “I’m petrified.” Then my face falls.

  “Emily, honey, listen to me. I know you’re scared, but the reason you and I left that stuffy, male-dominated law firm was so that our lives wouldn’t revolve around our careers. Right?” She reaches out and takes my hand. “We topped out there and were skipped over because of our gender. Right?”

  She’s right. I didn’t want to grow old and be left with a life full of regret. I wanted to meet someone and have a family. I wanted to have the chance to travel and meet people and spend time with my loved ones. I nod at her and say, “Yes. This is just so unplanned.”

  “And unplanned is totally out of the box for you. I know that, but, I promise, I will be here every step of the way to support you and your baby. You are not alone. Besides that, from what I’ve seen, Drew is madly in love with you. I have no doubt he’s going to be thrilled.”

  I shake my head jerkily. “No. I asked him yesterday, and he got really uncomfortable. He was so weird about it. I don’t think he’s ready for this either.”

  “You asked him directly?”

  “No, I asked him if he’d ever thought about having kids.”

  Rebecca’s shoulders bob up and down with her quiet laugh. “That was brazen.”

  “It was stupid. Not bold.”

  “Regardless, you brought it up as a hypothetical situation. You can’t rely on reactions to hypothetical questions. That’s not fair. Once he finds out and gets used to the idea, things will work out. You just have to give him time to adjust, just like you need time to adjust.”

  She grabs my hand, pulling me out of my chair. “Let’s get this done so we know what we’re dealing with. After we know for sure, we can deal with Drew.”

  Once we’re in the bathroom, she lifts three boxes out of her bag. “I got several just to be safe.” She holds up one. “This one takes two minutes and says clearly pregnant or not pregnant, depending on the results.” She picks up another. “Ditto, with this one. It takes two minutes and has a plus sign for positive.” She hands me the third box. “This one has a color indicator line and takes three minutes. Oh, and they all say they can detect pregnancy five to six days before a late period so you should be good.” She takes a deep breath and then smiles. “I hope you need to pee.”

  I’m completely overwhelmed, staring at her with my mouth open and my eyes wide. “It’s a bit overkill, don’t you think?”

  “We want to be sure.” She turns to leave me alone, then asks, “Oh, do you want me to stay?”

  “No,” I mumble. “I think I can handle it.”

  After she’s gone, I juggle to pee on the three strips, which is no easy feat. Once that’s done, I set them on the sink basin, lined up in a perfect row, and rush away from the bathroom, averting my eyes.

  I don’t want to look.

  Still adjusting my skirt, I head back to my office where Rebecca is waiting for me.

  “It’s done.”

  “And…”

  “Are you kidding? I didn’t look.”

  “Oh, Jesus Christ.” She stands and runs to the bathroom. A few seconds later, she starts screaming.

  I can’t move. I know what that sound means and I’m frozen in place. I place my hand on my stomach and take a deep breath.

  “You’re having a baby!” Rebecca says from the door. “Emily, oh my God!” She shows me all three tests. They’re all positive. “You’re pretty freaking pregnant.”

  I bend over and place my head between my knees, feeling like I want to throw up.

  She rests a hand on my back and rubs in small circles. “You’re going to be fine, I promise.”

  “I don’t have a choice now. I have to be.”

  “That’s right, but I wish you were happy about it.”

  I sit upright and I try to force out a smile. “I’m not unhappy… just a bit shocked.” My voice hints at a whine because I’m fighting with my emotions. “My fear has become a reality and now I have to face it… share the news with my family… deal with things I’m not sure I’m ready to deal with.”

  “What about Drew?”

  “What about me?” he says from the door of my office.

  My eyes meet Rebecca’s, and she tucks the pregnancy tests under her arm.

  “Good morning, Drew,” she blurts.

  He smiles. “What’s up, ladies?”

  “Oh,” I laugh, popping out of my chair, hoping to lure his attention from Rebecca. I stand and approach him, lifting on my toes for a kiss. “Bec was wondering if you’d be here today, and here you are.” As I say this, I hear one of my desk drawers open, then close, and I know Rebecca must have stashed the tests.

  He nods, and his eyes are piercing as he watches me. “I’m on my way into the office, and I wanted to check on you and see how your evening was.”

  “Oh, right!” I turn toward Rebecca. “I forgot to tell you, my mom showed up last night, out of the blue.”

  Rebecca gives me that look and then grins as she says, “I told you that was going to happen.”

  I blurt out a nervous laugh. “That’s right! Ha… yeah, you did, didn’t you?”

  “So, Drew got ambushed with meeting the mom without any warning?”

  He laughs now too. “It was fine. We actually had a lot of fun during dinner.”

  Rebecca grins. “She is a remarkable lady. I think you’ll get along great with her.”

  “Anyway,” I say, “I forgot to mention I had an early meeting this morning, but we’re all finished. Thanks for checking on me though.”

  “If you’re all finished up,” he glances at his watch, “do you have time for breakfast?”

  “Oh, sorry, I can’t today. I usually have brunch with Mac on Fridays but I’ve had to cancel that as well. I’m just too busy. Raincheck?”

  He looks disappointed but then says, “Maybe dinner tonight.”

  Rebecca laughs. “I love how you say that like the two of you haven’t had dinner together the last two nights.”

  I flash her a fake dirty look. “We have three weeks to make up for.”

  Drew winks at her. “I didn’t want to be presumptuous.”

  “All right, all right,” Rebecca replies. “I’ll leave you two alone to plan your evening.” She squeezes Drew’s shoulder on the way out. “See you at our meeting on Tuesday, Drew.”

  “You can join us, you know.”

  I hear her laughing on the way to her office. “P
robably not a good night for a tagalong, but thank you for the invite.”

  When she’s gone, he says, “I really don’t mind if she joins us for dinner.” Then he tugs me closer with a little more force than I was expecting. “I missed you last night.”

  I’m flush against him, and I like it. His warmth is comforting, and his affection welcomed, especially knowing what I know.

  “So… dinner?” he asks. “I have something I need to talk to you about.”

  “Perfect, I have something too…”

  His eyebrows draw in. “Everything okay? I got the impression you two were scheming when I came in.”

  “If we were, I certainly couldn’t tell you about it, could I?”

  He laughs, dropping his head forward. “Very true.” He nuzzles my neck. “I need a drink after the day I’ve had. Do you have a problem with the Pub House for dinner tonight?”

  “Drew, it’s only the morning. What do you mean by the ‘day you’ve had’?”

  “Okay, correction. The day I’m going to have.”

  I love it there but I don’t exactly want to tell him I’m pregnant at a loud pub.

  “Hum, can we go somewhere with less noise and atmosphere. How about The Dinner Club?”

  “Sounds great, see you there. How about seven?”

  He takes my elbow and draws me into a deep kiss. As he sinks into me, I revel in how good it feels. In his arms, I feel like nothing could go wrong. I want this and when he holds me, I have zero doubts about us. But I also know that’s naive thinking. I’m carrying a baby and that’s no small matter. It’s a child, our child. I close my eyes as that thought sinks in.

  We made a baby together and knowing Drew is now a part of me causes my heart to bloom with possibilities.

  I love him, I realize, and feeling this sudden rush of emotion is almost overwhelming. When his hands slide to the back of my neck, I mumble, “Drew.” Because I know him and what he’s thinking. “Please don’t take the pins out of my hair.”

 

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