by Auriane Bell
“You knew… you knew all along, didn’t you?” Mairin mumbled unbelievingly.
Vivian shrugged meaningfully, took his blanket and wrapped it around Mairin.
“Come.”
Mairin continued to stare at him even after he had picked up the flower she had put on the floor and started to walk. At the door to the balcony he turned around, holding the bloom in one of his big hands, questioningly looking at her.
Deciding that she had no reason to make him wait any longer, she hurried to his side and followed him out on the balcony. It was still early spring and she had expected it to be freezing cold but instead of being led into the open she found herself in another room with a large window front.
“Shall I open it up?” Vivian asked.
Mairin shook her head. “I’m cold already,” she admitted shyly.
Vivian nodded and gestured her to have a seat. Wrapped into the duvet she scuttled to the large swing and sat down. The blanket yielded to her sides and made it look as if it were trying to devour her.
Vivian smirked but soon his expression turned serious again.
“You mustn’t think that it’s your decision I’m angry about,” he explained. “As I said, I don’t care to take you away from Adrijan. However, I do not approve of your conduct either. How could you be so cruel? He trusted you.”
“I know,” Mairin whispered conscious of guilt.
The immortal sat down next to her, moaning as if he were suffering under the weight of his years. He put his feet firmly on the ground, pushing against the floor, slowly making the swing move back and forth.
“He has always been good to me, but when it was important, I couldn’t be there for him. He... Adrijan almost died trying to protect Therry. It was entirely my fault. And then I realised that he had to have killed so many people over the years... I didn’t know how to handle my own feelings. I believe he’s a good man and I know that it can’t have been easy for him but is it alright to take someone’s life?”
After a short moment of silence, Vivian started to talk again.
“He and I, we carry the same weight. We have to survive but we can’t do that without living off others.”
Mairin drew her legs to her body and hid them under the blanket.
“Only our method differs,” he continued.
“Have you ever... killed anyone in the process?”
Vivian shook his head. “Not in the process, no.”
Mairin lifted one brow upon hearing his answer but the immortal continued talking.
“What is worse though? Taking away years that could’ve been well spent or consuming the last drop of life? The young women who give their life energy to me – they do not care about losing a year or two. They don’t think of what might happen in ten or twenty, or maybe even thirty years. They are too full of life to worry about what may come, and so they’re easy targets. I give them what they want in exchange for what I need and we are both not too troubled by it.”
“Hmmm.” Mairin started to see what he was getting at.
“It is true that Adrijan has decided to take a different path, but isn’t it wrong to condemn him for taking the responsibility for the deaths of people who wanted to die?”
“Who is he to decide who lives and who dies?” Mairin whispered. She remembered how burdened Adrijan had seemed when he had told her about her father. The matter had to be troubling him too.
“Perhaps none of us should. Another question for you though: should you watch someone suffer or should you help that person, if you have the power to do so?”
“Of course you should help, but-“
“Have you ever been in so much pain, that dying has become more attractive to you than living? I know I haven’t – but Adrijan, he went through hell and back. If there’s a person who can empathise then it’s surely him. He’d never allow anyone to die on a mere whim.”
“Still...” Mairin mumbled.
“Don’t forget that the device doesn’t work, unless one agrees to the exchange.”
“Couldn’t they be cured with it?”
“Some of them maybe, but someone else would have to pay for it. Moreover, such an exposure of the hour glass would endanger its secrets. Imagine what would happen if someone got their hands on it and forced you into giving up your life by putting you under pressure.”
“I can see why you have to keep it secret,” Mairin mumbled. “There is no going back though. What if they regret it? What if they could’ve been saved?”
“I don’t think you should agonise over that. Your life is your own and if you want to end it –
who should be allowed to order you not to?”
“What about friends? What about relatives? What about bystanders who get mixed up in it?”
“Nobody should be forced to live, not even by a dear friend. Naturally that doesn’t mean they have to be pushed into dying – if they can be convinced that life is worthwhile then why not live?
Either way it’s my opinion that you shouldn’t drag anyone into your own demise, but I can’t decide that for everyone. When Adrijan takes their lives, no bystanders are getting involved. You could say he’s the unnatural way of dying naturally.”
“Adrijan is getting involved.”
“Mhm. He is and he has to live with the consequences. Can you see now, that what he does takes a lot more courage and is nobler than what I’m doing?”
Mairin found it difficult to form a valid opinion on a topic that seemed to allow no evident ‘right’ or ‘wrong’. She knew though, that Adrijan was a kind man and like Vivian had explained as well, she couldn’t imagine him taking anyone’s life light-heartedly. Perhaps it was best to simply put her trust in him for now.
“Why don’t you follow Adrijan’s example, if you think his way of surviving is better than yours?”
“I’m not an altruistic person,” Vivian said dryly.
Mairin frowned.
“I’ve come to know you a little. This can’t be the only reason,” she said boldly.
“The way I live... the brides... It’s a reminder of what I’ve lost,” Vivian admitted.
Mairin raised her eyebrows in puzzlement.
“This flower... do you know its name?”
Mairin shook her head.
“It’s a victoria amazonica,” he explained. “Do you care to hear an existing legend about it?”
She was slightly confused about the change of topic but agreed on listening.
“Hmmm.” Vivian cleared his throat.
“The legend goes something like this:
Long ago, a story was known about the moon being admired by every girl in the village. Night after night he was said to vanish behind the hill in the horizon, where he was celebrating with his favourite young women of which he would one day choose one and turn her into a star so they could stay together.
A village girl who heard the story was taken in by it and became obsessed with the idea of being the moon’s sweetheart, so she could become part of the sky. To achieve her goal she would stay awake even long after dusk and follow the moon on his journey over the firmament to the top of the hill, where she thought he ought to spot her more easily.
As time went by the girl became more desperate, yet despite her increasing lament and yearning, the moon never once took notice of her.
One night though, as the moon was at his brightest, the girl followed him again and came by a lake. Upon discovering his brilliant image in the water she thought the moon had finally come to take her away and plunged herself into the depth to be with him.
It wasn’t the moon she had seen. It had merely been a reflection and she found her death in the waters. The moon though who soon after learnt of the young woman’s fate felt sorry for the girl and turned her into a special star – a victoria amazonica, a flower that grows on soft water and only blooms at night.”
Mairin was patiently waiting for Vivian to reveal the reason for telling her this tragic story.
“To me there ha
s always been only one star but I’ve allowed my brides to become a victoria amazonica.”
“Magdala has never ceased to be your star,” Mairin noted and the immortal agreed with a nod.
“Of course I needed the security of having a bride. It meant that I could survive in case of an emergency without depending on Adrijan – like I have to at the moment.”
“You don’t have to do that. I wouldn’t let you take his life,” Mairin asserted.
Vivian sternly gazed into her eyes as if he were trying to decide whether she was telling the truth. Eventually his face softened.
“I hope so. Will you go to him now and tell him who you really want to be in your bedroom?” He was teasing her again, his lips curling into a sneer.
Mairin felt the heat rise to her cheeks.
“No, no- of course not!
I have no experience with... this kind of thing. After learning more about the present I feel that outside Traumstadt I must be the only one who hasn’t...”
Embarrassed she hadn’t been able to speak the last words out loud.
Vivian chuckled.
“That’s unlikely.”
His remark made her frown and she was tempted to ask him to explain. She didn’t get a chance.
“Anyway, since you mulcted me of my wedding night I shall find something else to satisfy my craving. Hmm...”
Mairin gazed at Vivian with big eyes. What was he suggesting?
“How about some wedding cake? Sounds good to me.” Vivian jumped up from the swing, causing it to jiggle. “Should I get a small piece for you as well?” He underlined the word ‘small’ with a gesture that led her to believe that he meant anything else than little. Regardless of the size of the cake, after what had happened, she wasn’t in the mood to eat.
“No thanks,” she declined the offer.
“Ah well, if I should stumble across something else you might like I’ll take it along.”
Vivian carefully put down the exotic flower.
“There are some T-shirts in the cupboard next to the door. Perhaps you’d like to change. Oh, you wouldn’t mind filling the bath tub in the meantime, would you?” The question was already spoken over his shoulder and Vivian left without waiting for a reply.
Vivian walked down the corridor, whistling a tune while producing his phone from the pocket of his jeans. Who would be able to tell him where Adrijan was? Alfred or perhaps Hilda? The immortal weighed the options for a moment and decided to call the maid via speed dial. He stopped at the top of the stairs and impatiently waited for her to answer the phone.
“Mmmh?” a sleepy voice greeted him.
“It’s not ‘Mmmh?’, Hilda, it’s ‘How can I be of service, Sir?’” he scolded her impishly.
“Ah!” It took her a few seconds to gather herself. “How can I be of ser-“
“Never mind all that now,” Vivian interrupted her. “You wouldn’t happen to know where I can find Adrijan, would you?”
“Why haven’t you called him instead of-“
Vivian sighed. If he had wanted to do that, he would have done it.
“Where is he?”
He could almost feel Hilda blush as she realised her rudeness.
“I saw him last in the great hall about two hours ago, Sir,” she paused. “I’m sorry, Sir.”
“That’s quite alright, Hilda. Sleep tight.”
He ended the call and headed for Adrijan’s assumed location.
Vivian had left her a while ago but she was too exhausted to move. She had remained on the swing, wondering if her decision had been right. Of course she didn’t regret not having to force herself to share the bed with the immortal, but she was still in the dark about her future and it upset her. More than anything though, she was afraid to show herself in front of Adrijan again.
Mairin had to persuade herself to get up to fulfil the task Vivian had appointed her with. At least she was alone in the quarters now and didn’t have to worry about being examined. Freed from the pressure it had put on her, she left the blanket behind as she went back inside to look for the bathroom.
Unable to hide the mobile on his body without taking the risk that Adrijan would notice it, Vivian calmly put it behind the flower vase. The silent guard of the entrance to the hall was resting on a stand and had to be almost as ancient as he was.
He didn’t enjoy lying to his brother but this time he felt it would certainly produce the best results. Knowing Adrijan’s feelings there was no doubt he wouldn’t suspect anything.
The immortal took a deep breath and opened the door to the great hall.
“Adrijan? Are you here? Adrijan!”
He had done his best to let his voice carry the desperate undertone necessary for his deception.
“Vivian? What are you doing here?” his brother’s voice sounded through the dark, revealing to him that he was not only surprised but also upset and trying to hide it.
“It’s Mairin... She won’t calm down at all. You have to come with me at once!”
Adrijan soon appeared in front of him in the semidarkness, worry written all over his face. Without further questions asked, he followed him back to the room that had been prepared for the wedding night. He was about to enter, when Vivian held him back.
“Wait, give me your phone. I’ll notify Alfred and Hilda as well.”
It was a critical moment, but after Adrijan had looked him up and down and realised that Vivian was standing in front of him half-naked, he had probably concluded that there wasn’t anything irrational about not having his own mobile with him.
Vivian took Adrijan’s phone from his outstretched hand and stepped aside to let him pass.
As expected, he suspected nothing and lost no time entering the room just to receive a forceful push in the back.
The immortal watched his brother stumble. His clumsy steps set off a multitude of ripple effects on the floor, giving him the appearance of an oversized fairy, who, in its drunken state, lubberly jumped from water puddle to water puddle. Hurriedly and with a big grin on his face Vivian locked the door, praising himself for a job well done.
The room was dark and the momentum almost caused him to sweep Mairin off her feet. Flailing with his arms he staggered towards her, regaining his balance in the nick of time. Mairin had backed away from him until she had reached the bed and with the mattress pushing against the hollow of her knees she was suddenly in the desperate need to steady herself. Just as Adrijan wanted to breathe a sigh of relief, Mairin grabbed his cassock and jerked him forward, achieving what Vivian’s push hadn’t been able to.
Together they tumbled on the bed and even though he tried to catch his fall, he landed on top of her, forcing the air out of her lungs. In all the confusion there was one thing that irritated him the most: the way the perception of the softness of her breast overshadowed everything that should have been of more importance to him.
Embarrassed he tried to get up but Mairin forced him down. She refused to let him go, firmly grasping his shoulder and burying her fingertips in his back.
“Don’t get up!” she pled.
“I... what is this about?” he asked, ordering himself to ignore her entreaty look. Immediately he started another careful attempt.
“Don’t... don’t get up!” she repeated. “And don’t look down.”
Her second request was almost like an invitation and before he knew what was happening he had directed his gaze to where he wasn’t supposed to look. Adrijan only came as far as to her bare shoulders and upper arms that were adorned with silver lines and dots but it was enough to realise why she hadn’t wanted him to look at her.
It only took a moment for Mairin to notice that his eyes had been trailing off and she vigorously pulled him even closer, tearing at his clothes, forcing him yet again to bounce against her chest.
To make matters worse his body started to react to her. Soon, he was certain, she would be able to notice it too.
“I could simply close my eyes and get up.”
&
nbsp; His suggestion earned him another pull, another push against the irresistible softness. Adrijan didn’t dare to move and with bated breath awaited her next idea of torturing him. He was desperate to gain some distance between them, to stay in control.
He knew he wouldn’t be able to.
“Let me at least shift my weight a little,” he begged her.
Mairin nodded, giving her consent but she hardly let him back away.
Vivian was in high spirits and his thoughts were still with his brother when he discovered Engelin near the kitchen. What was she doing there this late? For a moment he considered the possibility that she was spying around for her mother but dismissed it almost instantly. He thought it far more likely that her sneaky behaviour resulted from an intention similar to his own: to steal some food for a late midnight-snack.
Luckily the girl hadn’t noticed him yet and not wanting to scare her away Vivian decided to approach her slowly from behind.
He was certain that he hadn’t made a sound but only a few steps away from the kitchen door the girl suddenly faced him.
“Are you looking for some cake, princess?” he asked her, putting on a friendly smile.
Engelin looked at him as if he had lost his senses, turned around and started to run.
Mairin cursed herself for dawdling. She had been just about to slip into a shirt after taking off the negligee when Adrijan had stumbled into the room and thrown her off her feet. It was just her luck that it had to have happened in the few seconds she hadn’t been prepared for the immortal’s return – or anyone else entering the room for that matter.
At the moment though, she had different problems than to worry about the reason. Besides, putting two and two together she had already concluded that it had to be Vivian’s fault.
Even fully dressed, Adrijan didn’t seem to be any less embarrassed about the situation than she was. He clearly despised being near her but she wasn’t willing to let him get up to discover her being naked except for the nothingness of a slip.
