Letters to Gabriella

by Patricia Paris

  “That’s a relief. I’d hate to think you could forget me so quickly.” He wasn’t sure what he felt when she’d asked who it was, but it hadn’t been good, and he didn’t know what to think about that. “So,” he said, getting back to the reason for his call. “Would you like to go out Friday night?”

  “I would, but I don’t know anyone who can sit with Chloe.”

  Justin hadn’t thought she might have a problem getting a sitter, and her daughter was too young to leave alone. He tried to think of someone to recommend, but the only names that came to mind were old girlfriends. He could suggest Mary, but that would lead to a whole different set of problems. He scratched his head. If he didn’t know Blake and Delaney already had plans, he’d ask his sister-in-law, but they’d promised Ben they’d take him to see some new kids’ movie.

  “Justin?” Gabriella said. “Are you still there?”

  “Yeah…yeah. Sorry, I was trying to think if I knew anyone who could watch Chloe.”

  “I’d invite you over, but…and please don’t take this the wrong way…I wouldn’t feel comfortable having you come to the house when Chloe’s here, not when we’ve just met.”

  “I understand,” Justin said, and he respected that her daughter’s welfare was a priority. “What if we take Chloe with us?” he suggested. “There’s a nice miniature golf course in Turkey Harbor. I don’t remember the name, but they’ve got a great outdoor grill. We could get a bite to eat and then play a round or two.”

  “Are you sure you want to do that?”

  “Positive. It’ll be fun, unless you both beat me.”

  Gabriella laughed. “Well, neither of us has ever played before so that’s doubtful.”

  “Good, then I might stand a chance,” he joked. “So is it a date?”

  “If you’re sure you don’t mind Chloe coming with us.”

  “Let me think. I get to spend the evening with the two prettiest ladies ever to swing a golf club and be the envy of every guy on the putt-putt course. Yeah, I think I can handle that.”

  “Okay, but if it’s all right, I’d prefer that we meet you there.”

  It wasn’t his preference, but if he had a little kid, he’d probably be careful about how he went about exposing them to anyone he dated, too, until he’d been seeing them for a while.

  They agreed on a time, and Justin told Gabriella he’d call her Friday with the name and directions.

  “Here you go,” Molly said, putting his lunch on the table.

  Justin took a bite of his sandwich. He’d never dated anyone with a kid before. It might make things a little more complicated, but he was too attracted to Gabriella to let it be an obstacle. He liked kids. He enjoyed spending time with his nephew, and some day he hoped to have one or two of his own. If he and Gabriella continued dating, he wouldn’t mind including her daughter sometimes.

  Gabriella seemed smart, independent, and he liked her sense of humor. She was easy to talk to, and he was looking forward to getting to know her better. He was also looking forward to more than a platonic relationship, and he hoped she was, too.

  “I THINK I’ve been conned,” Justin said Friday evening after Gab and Chloe beat his score on the first round of miniature golf. They were also leading him by a couple of strokes halfway through the second.

  “What does conned mean?” Chloe asked.

  “Bamboozled,” he told her.

  The girl scrunched her nose as if to say, what the heck’s bamboozled.

  “You know,” Justin said, “tricked, fooled. I think you and your mom were fooling me about never playing before.”

  Chloe shook her head. “No, we never did, honest.”

  Justin narrowed his eyes and gave her daughter a doubtful look. Gab smiled. He’d been great with Chloe all evening.

  “I—don’t—know,” Justin said with further insinuation. “I think you two might be putt-putt sharks or something. I’m glad we didn’t bet money on these games, or you and your mom would be wiping me out.”

  Chloe giggled, catching on to his joking.

  “You just need to hit the ball softer,” she informed him. “Then it wouldn’t fly off the path all the time.”

  Gab laughed and Justin scowled at her.

  “Hey, I’m a guy. Put a bat or hammer or club in our hands, and we have this primitive urge to bash everything as hard as we can with it.”

  “You’re up, caveman,” Gab said, her lips twitching.

  “Urrrgh!” Justin grunted and flexed his biceps. He swung his club and missed the ball but hit it on the down-stroke. It flew backwards toward the green behind them. It bounced off an elephant statue with water spouting out of its trunk, ricocheted to the next green, and landed in front of a teenage couple who looked like they were on a date.

  Chloe ran over and retrieved the ball.

  “He’s not very good,” she told the two teenagers, as if in apology.

  “He probably tries to hit the ball too hard,” the girl remarked. She hitched her head toward her date. “He does the same thing.”

  “Yeah,” Chloe said, “it’s a guy thing!”

  Gab started laughing and when she glanced at Justin, he looked at her and chuckled. A warm feeling infused her. She was falling fast and hard, and even though this was their first official date, she thought she might already be halfway in love with him.

  When they played the next hole, Chloe missed hitting her ball twice. When she did hit it, it bounced off the green’s frame and rolled back to the starting tee. The next two holes, she played poorly as well. When she hit the ball completely off the green on the next play, Gab got suspicious. Justin gave Chloe a strange look, and Gab guessed he’d begun to wonder what was up as well.

  “I’m only one point behind you now, Chloe. You wouldn’t be trying to let me catch up on purpose, would you?” Justin asked.

  Her daughter gave Justin a look like she didn’t know what he was talking about, but Gab knew from the girl’s expression that was exactly what was happening.

  “Maybe you’re just getting better,” Chloe said, clenching her lips together.

  Justin screwed up his face as if he were considering the possibility, and then shook his head.

  “Nope. I think you’re throwing the game so I can catch up.”

  “Well…” Chloe glanced at her feet. “It’s no fun when you always lose…and me and Mom already won a game.” She looked back up and gave him a shy smile. “It’s not like cheating. I just thought you might want to win one, too.”

  Justin looked touched. “That’s a pretty sweet thing to do, kid.” He stooped down and balanced on his haunches, which brought him close to eye level with her daughter. “I appreciate you wanting to make me feel better because I stink at this game, but you don’t have to let me win. I’m having fun just being with you and your mom.”

  “You don’t want to win?” Chloe asked.

  “Well yeah, but I’d rather do it on my own. And if you’re good at something, like you are at putt-putt, then you deserve to win.”

  Chloe frowned. “Is this another guy thing?”

  Gab started laughing and Justin shook his head, smiling at Chloe. He stood back up and took his turn. Gab noticed he tried to hit the ball a little softer.

  On the next tee off, Chloe purposely missed her ball again. She looked up at Justin and shrugged her shoulders innocently.

  “Women,” he mumbled, “in one ear and out the other.”

  Despite trying not to, Chloe still won the game. After they returned their clubs, Justin bought them all some ice cream, which they ate at one of the picnic tables near the office.

  “I was thinking about taking Blake’s boat out for a spin Sunday. How about you and Chloe coming along? I’ll see if Ben can join us, too.”

  Gab looked at Chloe. Her daughter was smiling up at her, nodding her head.

  “We can pack a picnic,” he suggested. “We’ll anchor in one of the creeks and make an afternoon of it.”

  It sounded like fun. The only boat
she and Chloe had ever been on was the little aluminum row boat they’d found in the back yard, and they’d mostly gone around in circles, neither of them being very good at rowing. Chloe would probably love it, and Gab knew her daughter would enjoy getting together with Ben.

  “Okay, it’s a date.” She finished off her cone and wiped her mouth with a paper napkin. “Why don’t I take care of packing the picnic?”

  “Deal.” Justin gave her a crooked grin. “And bring your suits. We can take a dip if it gets too hot.”

  They said goodbye at her car. Gab buckled Chloe’s belt and then started around the back to the other side. Justin snagged her wrist and pulled her close.

  “Justin!” She shot a glance toward the rear window, but Chloe was too short to be able to see out behind her.

  “I know.” He pulled her a couple of feet further away from the trunk, ensuring they were out of Chloe’s sight range. The kiss was quick, but it was enough—enough to make her wish for more.

  “See you Sunday.” Justin ran his index finger along her jaw. He inhaled deeply and let his breath out on a sigh. She knew exactly how he felt.

  Gab spent most of Monday morning finalizing edits on the copy she’d written the week before for her largest client. She sent the file off to them just before noon, a day before her deadline, and breathed the sigh of relief she always felt when she got a confirmation email a few minutes later saying they had received it.

  Leaning back in her desk chair, she stretched her arms over her head and shook out her stiff muscles, complements of three hours at the computer without a break. She had two more deadlines this week, but she should be able to knock those out in about twelve hours. If she put in a couple of more this afternoon, and another few tomorrow, she could finish everything by Wednesday and still get them in early.

  She looked around the room that was now her office. When she moved here, it was dark and lifeless. The walls had been the same dark blue as the kitchen cabinets. Now the walls were a pale, buttery yellow, with bright white trim on the doors and moldings. There were only two windows in the room, both on the side wall, but she hoped to add another large one in the back when she remodeled. It would look out to the backyard and the water beyond.

  She’d replaced her father’s heavy dark furniture with her own, much lighter, contemporary bamboo and glass top desk, an ergonomic tan leather desk chair, and a large glass top coffee table where she could spread out her work if she needed. She had placed an assortment of thick, comfortable floor cushions around the coffee table, and when she didn’t have to be on the computer, it was her preferred place to work.

  Gab rolled her shoulders, wincing a bit when her sunburned skin objected. She regretted not reapplying sunscreen after they had gone swimming yesterday when Justin took them out on his brother’s boat.

  Aside from getting burnt, it had been a great day. Chloe and Ben spent most of the time in the water. Gab had been a little nervous at first, but with their life jackets on, neither of the kids showed any qualms about jumping off the swim platform. Once she got over her initial worry, she realized they were perfectly safe, and she enjoyed watching their antics as they tried to out-splash each other when jumping in.

  Justin had coaxed her into the water after lunch, and it had felt good to cool off. She spent most of her time in the water holding onto one of the noodle floats Justin brought along, perfectly content to observe while he and the kids played water tag and instigated splashing battles. It had all been very relaxed, except when they were riding in the boat and hit a wave or some other boat’s wake. Whenever that happened and the boat bounced up and down, Gab would let out a little scream. She tried not to because it made her feel foolish, especially since the kids thought it was great fun, but she hadn’t been able to help herself.

  Gab stretched her neck and sighed heavily. She had been avoiding going through the box of letters she’d found in the attic because she feared what she might discover. Despite that, some other part of her was driving her to find out what they were all about. So she had decided she would bring the box downstairs after lunch and face whatever truths were within.

  Lil called while she was eating lunch to ask when Chloe could come for a visit. The morning they’d left for Glebe Point, Gab had promised Lil that Chloe could spend two weeks with her before school started in the fall. Now there wasn’t too much time left, and Lil wanted to make sure she would get to see her granddaughter. After having promised, Gab didn’t feel right not following through. She agreed to drive Chloe to her in-laws the Friday after next, and Lil said one of them would bring her daughter home at the end of the visit.

  Chloe would be excited to see her cousins and old friends again, so Gab didn’t think she’d get too homesick. It would probably be a lot harder on her than her daughter.

  AFTER LUNCH, Gab retrieved the box of letters from the attic. Instead of taking it into her office as she’d planned, she took it out to the porch swing she had installed by herself just the week before. After two frustrating hours, she’d managed to drill the holes for the bolts in the proper place, get the screw hooks secured, and hang the swing. It had required filling three holes that she’d managed to drill just the slightest bit off, but she’d still felt proud when she attached the chains, hung the swing, and it hadn’t crashed to the porch floor when she sat on it.

  Settling onto the thick floral cushions she’d bought for it, she took out the letter on top that she’d thrown back into the box when she first found it. She closed her eyes and took several slow, steadying breaths. No matter what you discover it can’t hurt or change you, she told herself.

  Gab slid the paper out of the envelope and started to read:

  My darling little girl, how I wish I could hold you in my arms one more time and tell you all the things I would have told you before she took you away. Where are you now? I fear I may never see your sweet cherub face again. Too much time has passed with no trail to follow. Where, where, where?

  I fight my demons every day, but they’re strong, and I’m a weak man. Maybe if I’d known she would take away my sunshine, I could have found a way to beat them.

  How I used to look forward to your smile, and those innocent blue eyes, so full of trust. What is there to look forward to now? What reason to smile? You’re gone. You’re gone and darkness drowns what meager hope once lived in the lonely chambers of my heart.

  Gab pressed her trembling lips together, but it did nothing to staunch the tears welling in her eyes. It wasn’t signed, but she knew who had written the words, and although they contradicted everything she had ever been told or thought about her father, they rang true and she believed them.

  The first tear streamed down her cheek. She brushed it away and took out another letter.

  Happy Birthday, baby girl. What is your six year old heart wishing for today? Do you still want a pony? I’m sorry I was never able to get you one. I’m sorry for so much, dearest Gabriella. What would you…

  “Okay, I can’t stand it another minute,” Delaney said to Gab when they were almost done eating their lunch at Mosey’s Wednesday afternoon. “Just tell me to mind my own business if I’m overstepping, but I’ve been dying to find out what’s going on with you and Justin, and you haven’t said peep yet.”

  “Peep,” Gab chirped, giving Delaney a teasing grin.

  Delaney frowned. “I hope that’s not all you’re going to say. Blake’s been as closed mouthed as a clam, but I know he knows something. It’s infuriating.”

  “Really? He hasn’t said anything about the…about anything?”

  Delaney tilted her head and studied Gab. “Oh no you don’t…about anything what? What does that husband of mine know that he isn’t telling?”

  “He sort of interrupted an intimate moment between Justin and me,” Gab confided.

  Delaney brought her hands to her mouth, her eyes wide. “Oh.” She winced. “Awkward.”

  “Nothing more than a kiss,” Gab rushed to explain, “but…” She had trouble hold
ing back a wicked grin. “What-a-kiss!” Her body went limp, and she pretended to melt into the booth as she fanned herself with her napkin. “I never knew a kiss could be like that.”

  Delaney beamed, looking downright delighted by Gab’s revelation.

  “I mean, Delaney,” she straightened up and leaned forward, lowering her voice, “it was better than sex, at least anything I’ve ever had. Seriously, it was just a kiss, but…” She shook her head. “Never mind, I’ll never be able to explain it. Even if I could you wouldn’t believe a kiss could be so devastating.”

  “Don’t bet on it,” Delaney said, chuckling. “I know exactly how lethal those Morrison boys’ lips can be when they start working their magic.”

  Gab looked across the booth at her friend, who gave her a look that told Gab she hadn’t been the only one to fall under a magician’s spell. She started laughing and Delaney joined her.

  “I can’t believe I just told you all that.”

  “I’m so glad you did! And I’m so glad you two are…you are, something, aren’t you?”

  “Umm, I think so,” Gab said. “You know we spent the day together Sunday. And we went out one night last week. Chloe, too. The three of us played miniature golf.”

  “If you and Justin ever want to go out without Chloe, I’ve got a couple of good sitters who are always looking to earn some money, and they’re very trustworthy.”

  “Thanks. I’d like to get their names.”

  “Sure thing.” Delaney shifted in the booth and rubbed her expanding belly. “By the way, does Chloe like spaghetti? I was going to make it for dinner Friday night.”

  “She loves it. It was nice of you to invite her to stay over. She’s so excited about sleeping outside in a tent.” Gab finished the last sip of her coffee. “I think my daughter has had more new experiences in the last two months than she has in the last two years.”

  “I’m sure they’re just different kinds of experiences. You know, of course, I’ll probably be out there checking on them every fifteen minutes…or sending Blake out.” Delaney pulled her wallet out of her purse and put some cash on the table. “Does Justin know Chloe’s staying with us on Friday?”