by Kate Stewart
Lying back on the oversized, leather couch, I closed my eyes briefly. Moments later, I felt his fingers trail up my leg, keeping my eyes closed, my slow smile revealing to him I was awake.
“Hey, beautiful, keep them closed.” His voice moved over me like a warm blanket, and my body instantly responded. I did as he asked, his touch sending a welcomed shiver down my spine in anticipation. “Have you thought about me today?”
“Yes,” I replied, my voice heated.
“And,” he said, prompting for more.
“And what?” I breathed out as his hand pulled away. I could feel his presence sitting on the table next to me then heard the pop of the champagne.
“And how did I fuck you?” Two glasses were poured as he waited for my reply.
“The first time, from behind and hard, the second time, laid out in your bed. And it lasted much, much longer. The third time…”
“Tell. Me.”
“Aiden, please touch me.” I was already writhing.
“Tell me, naughty Nina.” His hand resumed its strumming on my legs, and I opened them in invitation, which he took. He paused when he realized I was already bare then slid his fingers through my drenched folds, feathering my clit then thrusting them inside. My body arched up at the intrusion, but he pushed me down then caressed my pebbled chest through my dress.
“So naughty,” he breathed into my ear. “This has been waiting for me all day.” I could hear the evidence of my arousal as he fingered me viciously. “And the last time I fucked your pussy, Nina, how did I do it?” Rough fingers explored me, my eyes still closed as I reveled in the feeling, still on the verge of explosion. “Tell me.”
“Lower.”
“And you will have it all. Keep them closed.” He pulled me to standing then led me across the room, placing my hands out in front of me until they touched the glass wall that surrounded us. Slowly lifting my skirt up, he kept it bunched around my waist, smoothing my thighs with his hands before pulling me back and stretching me before him.
“Keep them closed, or you won’t get my cock, Nina.”
I nodded. Panting, I spread my legs further for him without him asking. I heard the zip of his jeans and my adrenaline spiked, kicking my need into overdrive.
Please, please, please, please.
“You sure you want this?”
“Aiden,” I warned.
Just as soon as my warning was heard, I felt the burn in my scalp as he wrapped his fist in my hair and buried himself to the hilt in one long thrust.
“Oh, God.”
“Keep them closed,” Aiden rasped on a promise of more. I pounded my hands against the barrier as he fucked me hard and fast, the build growing intense and unbearable.
His thrusts were frantic, hungry, and animalistic, and I welcomed each one with my moans. His hand came down hard on my ass as he pulled my hair, keeping us tightly together with brute force. Another whack at my skin and I was bucking back onto his cock, my body trembling with the need for release.
Thwack. Thwack. Thwack. Thwack.
Each slap of his hand became harder than the last, and it sent me reeling. As I screamed his name, I felt the rush of orgasm. Aiden gripped my hair even tighter, making my eyes tear up as he pressed my face into the glass.
“Open them.”
Blinding ecstasy ripped through me as I shuddered and pulsed, completely unaware of my surroundings. I screamed in pleasure as wave after wave hit me, praising his efforts, and losing myself completely in my body’s release. It continued on and on as Aiden reached around, massaging my clit in quick strokes, spurring it further, making it last.
Slowly Aiden massaged my singed skin as I focused my attention on the sight before me. Realizing Devin’s eyes were on mine, I cried out in surprise then jerked back in revulsion before looking up to Aiden, whose eyes were trained on Devin. Devin was sitting alone in the lounge adjacent to the conference room, a drink in hand, and completely focused on me. Unshed tears lay heavy as Devin watched me scramble to cover myself, pulling my skirt down.
“Oh my God,” I breathed, watching Devin’s expression go from surprise to devastation.
I looked to Aiden for answers and saw the glass remote in his hand. “Aiden…why?”
He looked down at me with a smirk. “Shall we go face the music?”
Incredulousness turned to rage as I watched him physically gloat, his eyes remaining trained on Devin. “How could you fucking do that to him?”
Aiden’s eyes drifted to me in mild surprise. “You chose this place. And, baby, I thought I told you I’d claim you anywhere.” He pulled me to him as I punched at his chest furiously.
“How could you do THAT!”
He gave me an odd look. “It was pretty fucking perfect, don’t you think? Weren’t you the victim when he was fucking his wife on his desk? Isn’t that what you told me?” Looking between them, it dawned on me.
“This isn’t about justice for me, though, is it?” Aiden looked down at me with contempt.
“It wasn’t about him. It had nothing to do with him until you brought him into it!” he countered.
“I didn’t invite him here!” I whirled on Aiden. “You thought I wanted this? That I am capable of this!”
“You didn’t plan on having him out there when I fucked you?” He seemed genuinely unbelieving as I studied him.
“Jesus, Aiden, and you would go along with it? This is who you are?”
I looked back to Devin, who was now standing, drink in hand, an odd expression passing over him. Grabbing my purse, I walked out to him, unable to deal anymore with the look on his face. “I didn’t know, Devin. I swear to God I didn’t know you were sitting there.” I couldn’t look at him as I pleaded my worthless case. I heard glass shatter, looked in that direction, and saw the splintered remnants of Devin’s glass had fallen short of Aiden’s step out of the conference room.
What was I thinking having Aiden meet me at the fucking Admiral’s Club where Devin and I met? I was sure Devin would think this was purposeful.
Everything went in slow motion from that moment on as Devin rushed Aiden in a bloodthirsty rage. It dawned on me then that the look I saw on Devin’s face was resolve; he intended to kill him. I heard the sick crunch of bones as I braced myself for war. Devin landed blow after blow as Aiden took the first few in an attempt to taunt him.
“Come on, cousin, you can do better than that,” Aiden urged as he took another solid blow to the face.
I screamed as they crashed through the glass table in front of me, Devin getting the better of him before Aiden—who had him in both weight and size—landed a hard blow to his midsection, knocking him off balance. Devin recovered in mere seconds, unfazed as I rushed to him before he went back in.
“Please, Devin, stop. Please. Stop. I’m so sorry, stop!” I was pushed out of the way as he roared, moving toward Aiden, his intent clear. I screamed for help as a bloody and now defeated Aiden took blow after blow, his face reddening with each one. Several people came running in from what looked like a private party to aid in breaking them up. Devin was uncontrollable, as it took five men to finally pull him off. I stood, mouth gaping, at the animal Devin had turned into, his eyes fixed on Aiden. Cedric came in moments later, sheer panic written on his features.
“YOU’RE LATE!” I screamed at him as he gave me a sharp nod in guilt before pulling me away. I looked to a bloody and battered Aiden who seemed pleased with himself for getting the best of Devin’s temper, while Devin looked to me completely broken. I let out a sob as Cedric pulled me out of the door.
§§
“Where were you?” I was berating Cedric as I tried to wrap my mind around what had just happened.
“Downstairs with Taylor. I was only there for five minutes. You were safe inside the room with Mr. McIntyre.”
“Not really,” I said, the adrenaline crash making me dizzy as Carson drove us home. “I’ll never be safe with a McIntyre, and that’s the sad truth of it.”
Aiden
thought me capable of being a monster, and now Devin saw me as one, as I had him. I ignored my emotion from the look on Devin’s face as I purposefully numbed myself.
No more. It was all over, and I did not intend to entertain any of it further.
Aiden wasn’t perfect and his only flaw that I knew of lay within his contempt for a man I still loved. It made him the bad guy, and I’d had enough of the bad guy. I took a trusty Xanax from my purse and saluted Cedric with the bottle while throwing my phone out the window and into the Atlantic as we crossed the bridge.
“You are going to be so bored.” I toasted him as he took the bottle away, allowing me my one pill.
There was absolutely nothing to think about or mull over. I was completely done with both men. I had never been more certain.
As I slipped into a medicated sleep an hour later, I was thankful for the pull into darkness.
“In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer.” —Albert Camus
§§
ONE MONTH LATER
Six miles was a personal best for me, and I had hit it every morning for the last week. I was in the best shape of my life just by pushing a little harder. Cedric high fived me as we slowed ourselves to a stop. He was in amazingly great shape. He’d started joining me in the ocean and in the gym. We’d actually gotten to know each other pretty well in the last month. Though he refused to give up aerosol cheese, I had talked him into making better food choices. My health was a priority and hobby, and I felt amazing.
It had taken absolutely no time for me to accept that every day was Monday. All my emails were filtered by Taylor, and I made sure I had absolutely no knowledge of whether or not either man had tried to contact me. I changed my phone number, and no one was allowed past my newly installed gate. This isolation had been by choice. I alone created the poison, and I alone created the remedy.
And of the latter, I was proud. It had been completely quiet as far as the threat on my life. Cedric had mentioned they were close to catching the driver of the car, and I knew it was just a matter of time. I still had some trust left, and my greatest allies were Taylor and Cedric.
Taylor had been absent lately, commuting back and forth from Savannah. My guess was a man, and after a thousand attempts to pry it out of her, Cedric told me as much.
Finally, Taylor has a man. Was that so damn hard?
I still hadn’t decided what to do with the land, though I knew by ridding myself of it I was all the wiser. I could no longer afford to care about the mystery behind it. When I wasn’t busy enough and was forced to think, I spent my time wondering what had caused so much hate between family.
And I thought mine was fucked up.
Realizing there were answers I would never get and would never seek, I’d decided I was better off not knowing. I had convinced myself of that. Somewhere deep inside and only late at night when sleep evaded me, a part of me that I wouldn’t let surface cried without tears. I’d cut her off completely from my daytime persona, and only when I lay in bed, weak with worsening thoughts, did I let her come out to remind me of Devin’s face twisted in agony at the sight of me, or Aiden’s promise to give me all that I needed before turning our relationship into a cruel joke on Devin.
Little by little, the woman who wished for a different outcome discarded her feelings subtly, like Andy discarded the rocks from his wall in that movie Shawshank Redemption. Little by little, I was moving a big mountain a few rocks at a time.
I went to bed after the first month, feeling accomplished. Being alone for the first time wasn’t so damned scary, and it wasn’t intimidating. It was just life. My life.
I looked to Cedric, who was still heavily winded, and smiled proudly as I walked out of the gym.
All I had to do was clear the air of my obvious distractions to see clearly. I was an ambitious, determined, wealthy woman with a strong, insatiable, sexual appetite who needed to take control of her life.
And so I did.
And you know what I found out? It was way harder to be weak.
§§
Deciding never to set foot in at the Admiral’s Club again, for obvious reasons, I sipped a Tom Collins on the rooftop deck overlooking the sunset when my phone buzzed.
“Nina.”
“Hey, Taylor. I just got done with the meeting with Jones. He’s a weirdo. Like seriously, his inventions might be amazing, but I won’t see him again without Cedric.” Cedric, now an integral part of my world, had left me alone last night, confirming that they had found the man who attempted to take my life. I was celebrating my first night of real freedom and was excited to finally be back in control. “Come see me. I’m at the rooftop deck of the—”
“Nina, shut up and listen.”
“Okay,” I said carefully. “What’s your problem?”
“In Savannah, I’ve been frequenting a club called The Rabbit Hole.”
I sighed. “You know, Taylor, you finally want to talk about your shit, and I’m finally over asking.”
“Please shut up.”
“Okay,” I said, sensing the seriousness in her voice.
“It’s a sex club. Do you know what I’m saying?”
Shocked at her admission, but willing to share, I admitted, “Yes, Taylor. I’ve had a Dom.” Well, actually two.
“I know because he’s here.”
“Who?”
“Devin,” she answered in a hushed voice.
I watched the sun drift beneath the horizon as the Ravenel Bridge lit up. The birds danced through the air in sendoff, as if to tell the sun goodnight. So many things had changed, and yet my love for this city remained the same. I stood still, admiring the harbor as I buried my emotion, playing immune to Taylor’s confession.
“Taylor, nothing surprises me anymore. Seriously, we really need to clear the air between us, you and I. And why should I care?” I continued in vain, already speed walking toward my car.
“I just thought it strange him being here.”
“Well, he is a newly divorced man and needs a new sub.”
The news of Devin and Eileen’s divorce was unavoidable. It had been in every local paper, and our scene at the club only added to the already wagging tongues. I had managed to keep the media out along with everyone else in my life, including my mother turned stalker who had been the only one who’d almost successfully broken into my solid barrier.
Devin had actually done it. His divorce was finalized, and his ex-wife was MIA, rumored to be vacationing overseas to avoid the embarrassment.
Godspeed, crazy bitch.
I got into my Mercedes and turned on the ignition as I spoke. “Let’s say for curiosity’s sake—”
“I’ll text you the address.”
“Taylor?” She’d already hung up.
I broke every speed limit between Charleston and Savannah as I rode down U.S. 17.
Whatever Devin had been hiding, I was positive it had to do with that damned club. I cursed my stupidity for the laws I was breaking to spy on a man I swore I was done with. I had to justify to myself over and over that I was attempting to get answers I rightfully deserved. I had suffered a lot for little satisfaction and remained even less knowledgeable than when we’d started our affair.
If he was able to move on with another woman so quickly after he’d claimed he loved me, something inside of me had to see if for myself.
I thought of every conversation we’d had, and searched our dialogue for every clue, but not one led me anywhere. Devin had grown up in Savannah, that much I knew. He’d mentioned a few places he’d wanted to take me, none of them being a sex club. As much as I’d been reluctant to admit it, and as subtle as it had been, I was Devin’s sub. His willing sub, as I had been Aiden’s. This both fascinated and infuriated me. Why wouldn’t he just admit to being this way? I’d granted his every wish, and denied Devin nothing sexually.
Taylor’s apparently a member of the club, too. Hence the reason why she’s been so damn secretive. I s
hould have guessed it. Was the entire world hiding behind a daytime mask? I knew I was. It simply made everything easier. My night demons were still haunting me, and as much as I tried to move on, memories played on a continuous loop. I needed answers.
“And thus I clothe my naked villainy
With odd old ends stol’n out of holy writ;
And seem a saint, when most I play the devil.”
― William Shakespeare
§§
Arriving at the club an hour and twenty minutes later, I cautiously pulled into The Rabbit Hole, noticing the parking lot was full. Staring at the oddly carved doors, I realized they reminded me of the movie Alice in Wonderland.
Fitting name.
I wondered briefly what the inside of places like this were like before the reminder of why I was here in the first place burst through the double doors. Devin was hightailing it out of the club and running to his car like his life depended on it. I slumped in my seat, knowing he hadn’t seen me, and relieved he was alone.
Nope, nope, nope, nope, Nina. NO!
I waited for him to start his car, knowing if I didn’t catch him as soon as he pulled out I would never catch him. He was in a hurry. I turned on my lights and pulled up behind him just as he was turning out of the parking lot. He sped out as I followed him as closely as I could without seeming too obvious. When I started to recognize the route, I slowed behind him considerably, giving him more space. And with his final turn, I stopped altogether. He was on Peach Tree Rd.
The land. My land.
I’d only been out here one other time, just after I’d obtained it, but I had come alone, spending my time sitting next to the water, soaking in the beauty, and hoping I could make some use of it, though no idea ever stuck. Now I felt the dread in the pit of my stomach as I killed my lights a quarter mile away in the dark night, praying my silent Mercedes remained that way. Rolling down my windows as I approached, I noted Devin’s car parked next to the small shed. It was lit from within, and I felt my stomach roll.
That’s when I heard the first scream. I jumped in my seat, suddenly paralyzed as I hit the brakes. Waiting and listening for another, I prayed to God it was a figment of my imagination.
