The Secrets We Keep: Secrets and Revelations Book One

by Selina Marie

  “And why are you with her?” She says it with such utter disgust, like Emilia isn’t her little sister, the girl she grew up with and cared about, even if only for a brief moment.

  Interesting. Very interesting.

  I try a different tactic and tell her the truth. I want to see if there really is no shred of humanity left in this girl.

  “Heard her screams as I went passed the house. He tried to drown her in the bathtub.” I tell her vacantly, my eyes searching for any signs of remorse or pain for what Emilia went through. Nada.

  “She was probably asking for it, she never could do much right,” she says with a nasty bite in her tone. It takes everything in me to stay rooted to my spot and not wrap my hand around her throat and squeeze—and not in the way I like to do it in the bedroom—the way I like to squeeze when I end lives, feeling the desperate pulsating of the neck, as it fights for one last hit of oxygen. The satisfaction when that breath is denied.

  I don’t answer, not trusting that my patience won’t snap—shortly followed by her neck.

  “You wanna come back to the Bay with me?” I ask, turning on the charm, seduction and proposition in my voice.

  Alexis frowns, looking skeptical for a second. I step into her space and run my fingers on the bare skin of her thigh, just underneath the hem of her miniskirt. I hear a whimper as my finger rubs her skin and I say with a seductive smirk, “We can break into Penderal High and revisit those labs… I know how much you liked it under the desks.” She giggles what she thinks is a sexy laugh, and I know I’ve won.

  I stride back to the car after telling her I’ll meet her back at Penderal Bay tonight. Then Alexis disappears into the house, swaying her hips as if she thinks she’s putting on a show for me. She’s not.

  What the fuck have I done? I didn’t think this through, and I am thoroughly reminded of that when I look in the back seat finding Emilia still there, her eyes closed looking like a fucking angel. I check her breathing and her pulse is strong—thank fuck.

  She’s going to wake up soon and I have to get her back now. Strapping her in the best I can, I jump in behind the wheel and step on the gas, the gates opening for me immediately. At least they know who I am.

  Driving back to Penderal Bay I break at least five laws, not stopping for anyone. I run through every red light and stop sign, cause I’m on a fucking deadline. I would send a silent prayer up to God to do me a favor and keep Emilia asleep until we are home—that is, if I was a religious man—I’m not.

  I don’t believe there is some grand puppeteer in the sky; I believe we make our own destiny.

  Some may argue it’s by some miracle, or that my prayers had been answered, because I make it back home before Emilia has opened her eyes. I would argue it’s because I broke every fucking rule on the road to get here.

  Shutting off the engine, I pick up Emilia’s body that no longer resembles a deadweight. She’s able to lift her head up a little herself, her strength regaining.

  Once I make it up the stairs, I take a left instead of a right, carrying her perfect, petite body into my bedroom for the second time. It feels like déjà vu all over again.

  I place her into my bed, covering her with a dark grey blanket I keep thrown over the back of the lounger on the far side of my bedroom. The way her dark hair fans out around her face is enchanting.

  Irritation strokes underneath my skin. She’s making me think words like enchanting, which is most definitely not in my vocabulary. I let it go though, because it seems that when it comes to this gorgeous goddess, any hate I’d felt toward her, that had scratched and clawed from underneath my skin, has now dulled down to quite a pleasant caress. Even the beast inside of me wants to bite her till it hurts, then kiss away the pain.

  Her porcelain skin has started to gain some color, her cheeks now wear a tempting shade of rose pink, which makes me want to stroke the fragile skin where the blood is gently pooling beneath.

  Emilia turns her head away from me in her slumber, exposing her neck, which looks fucking deliciously edible. My hand twitches, begging to touch her.

  I step out onto my balcony as I mentally go over what I’m going to say to her when she wakes up and will undeniably ask questions. I won’t be lucky enough to get away with the silent treatment this time. I know I’m going to have to talk, give her some truths, no matter how much I don’t want to.

  Then there’s the issue with Alexis, who I don’t doubt will be arriving in the next twelve hours—if she is still as desperate as the girl I knew back in high school. There is no doubt she is absolutely still that girl.

  The guy she’d clung onto back at Emerald Hills told me everything I’d already guessed. If she had meant anything to him at all, he wouldn’t have fled like a fucking pussy. He would have stood up and fought for his girl. He didn’t, which proves my theory that Alexis Blake is as much of the promiscuous whore she was in high school.

  Nothing has changed, and as soon as I showed the smallest bit of interest, she came running, just as she did every time I wanted to get my dick wet. Like I said, nothing has changed.

  Hasn’t everything changed though?

  It’s getting darker now, the blues and black of the night sky merging, resembling a deep indigo bruise. The moon is full tonight, shimmering in the reflection on the water.

  Everything becomes easier at night, it’s when the demons come out to play; it’s when I come out to play. I flourish in the darkness, like a flower blooms in the light.

  Emilia is different though, she resembles a rose. Beautiful, delicate and soft between your fingertips, but much like a rose, Emilia has thorns. She knows darkness, but I know it well too, and I’m well acquainted with the way Emilia wraps herself up in her thorns, not allowing anyone to get close.

  In my case, it’s more the thrill of the dare to get close, the temptation of touching the thorns, letting them cut deep into my skin as I tear them from her body, desperate to feel the silky-smooth center. And I will choose dare, every time.

  She’s going to ask how Alexis knows who I am.

  She doesn’t know that Alexis is coming here.

  There’s still so much that Emilia has no idea about when it comes to her sister—her entire family, in fact.

  I also have to keep Alexis sweet, so that I can pry information from those toxic lips. Alexis cannot tell her, it will fuck everything up. Everything I have worked to keep hidden.

  I’m in such a goddamn fucking mess, and if one secret slips from Alexis’s mouth then everything will come plummeting down like the fucking domino effect.

  I need to hit something. I move to make my way to the gym, I stop though. Emilia is sitting in my bed, the blanket draped around her waist as she stares down at a spot on the cover, like she’s in a trance.

  Emilia’s head snaps up and her eyes lock onto mine as I watch her, waiting for the volcano brewing inside of her to erupt.

  She’s fucking furious. It’s almost as if I watch it happen, all of the events of today connect and become a clear picture in her head.

  “Do not play with me, Lukas. I want the truth. How the fuck do you know my sister?” She is seething and it looks so goddamn good on her.

  Emilia hasn’t noticed that she’s in my bed again, but I stride over to the lounger, taking a seat. I rest my elbows on my knees, linking my fingers together as I look at her, trying to decide how I am going to play this. A little truth, a little lie.

  “We went to high school together,” I tell her, giving her a truth.

  “Why did she call you baby?” she asks.

  Ah, smart girl with an even sharper memory.

  “Emilia, despite what you think, your sister was no Virgin Mary. In fact, it wouldn’t surprise me if she called the entire male student body baby. God knows she fucked them all… and a few faculty members if I remember correctly.” I tap my chin pondering the last part for effect, even though I know it to be a fact. There were many faculty members, including the headteacher.

  “Yeah, no
shit. Apparently, there’s a lot that I don’t know about her.” Her eyes drop down to the blanket again and I want them back on mine. My wish is granted when she looks back up at me, the rage having simmered a little, leaving space for what looks like grief and betrayal.

  “So, you fucked my sister?” I flinch because it’s true, but I don’t want to be responsible for the look in her eyes. I don’t speak. Don’t break eye contact, as I watch her hear the answer in the silence. The silence between us that always speaks a thousand words.

  She blows out a single laugh, like she’s come to some sort of sad, amusing realization.

  “You know, I remember the summer before Lexi went missing, we were at the beach.” She tilts her head toward the window, indicating that she means this beach.

  “We were messing around, actually having fun, which was a rarity, for me at least. Except for anytime I was with Mel…” She pauses, a frown playing between her brows as she stares out of the window into the night sky. “I thought I kept catching her looking up to the clifftop, but I was never sure what she was looking for. Or maybe who she was looking for.” She shrugs her shoulders, defeated, looking back to me.

  “And now it all makes sense. She was looking for you.” She sounds broken, and in that moment, I don’t want it to be about her sister. I selfishly want her to be broken over me. I don’t know what’s going through her head right now and it’s killing me, because her eyes are back on the fucking blanket and I need to see her. Emilia’s eyes don’t lie, and for once in my goddamn life I actually want the truth.

  “Alexis was never interested in me, Emilia,” I tell her. She laughs out loud, and the sound makes my heart beat faster.

  There’s an overwhelming feeling in my chest and the words are sitting on my tongue. My head doesn’t want me to say them, but a different part inside of me wants to give her another truth. Emilia isn’t my kryptonite—fuck that—this girl is my truth serum, which is so much more dangerous. Fuck it.

  “I know she wasn’t interested in me, because she was in love with my brother.” I let the words linger on my tongue, tasting them for the first time in a long time. I haven’t said the word ‘brother’ out loud for so long. Running my hands through my hair I wait for her to speak.

  “You have a brother? Does he live here with you? I haven’t seen him around,” she says, interested in this new information I’ve given her. It is risky, but it’s too late now.

  “No, you wouldn’t have seen him around… he’s dead.” I stand up. I’ve had enough talking. I hear her small gasp as I walk to the door. I turn back to her before leaving, “I need to make a phone call, I’ll be back soon. Emilia, you don’t have to stay in here. If you want to go back to your room, that’s fine.”

  Shit, this girl is getting to me.

  ◆◆◆

  Closing the door of my study, I dial Nate’s number. It’s late but he’ll pick up, he always does. I swear that fucker never sleeps. After four rings he picks up.

  “What’s up man? You’re interrupting one of my extracurricular activities, it better be good,” he tells me, his voice monotone and disinterested.

  Fucks sake, extracurricular activities for Nate can only mean two things—one, that he’s fucking some random, or two, he’s getting his hands bloody. Or he’s busy torturing Emilia’s best friend Melody. Apparently, they have history and he’s taking full advantage of being reunited with her again, which isn’t good for anyone.

  I clear my throat getting back to the reason I called.

  “I need you to intercept someone and make sure they get to the warehouse. White Mercedes Benz, I’ll text you the plate number. And Nate, don’t do any damage. I want her in one piece when I get there,” I tell him, hearing a distinct zipper sound and feminine whine in the background. I guess it was extracurricular activity number one.

  “Well, you’re no fun. Yeah, fine man, I got it covered. Text me when you’ll be there.” I end the call and text him the details.

  I take the stairs two at a time, expecting Emilia to have gone back to her room, but when I open my bedroom door, I hear the shower running. Is she using my shower? The thought makes me hard as hell and now all I can picture is Emilia naked, wet and all lathered up.

  I can’t deny it any longer. I want Emilia, and the worst thing about it, is that it isn’t just a carnal need for her physically anymore; I want more. I already knew I was falling in love with her, but that never meant that I consciously wanted her. That’s changed. I learned from my father, that even if you love someone, you can train yourself to feel the opposite. The fine line between love and hate in practice.

  Ten minutes later, Emilia steps out from my bathroom wrapped in a towel, droplets of water trailing down her neck to her breasts, and I want to lick them up. Her hair is dark anyway, but it looks as black as the night sky, tinted with blue when it’s wet. I want to grab it and wrap it around my fingers.

  I don’t bother to look away, the electricity in the air is different this time. Sitting on the edge of my bed my eyes follow her as she takes small steps closer towards me, nearly closing the distance between us. She walks to me and I can sense there’s something different about her. I don’t think I have ever seen someone with so much determination behind her eyes, she exudes confidence like never before, and it’s the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen. My dick strains against the zipper of my jeans, craving for her touch and the wet haven between her legs.

  The powerful, dominant look in her eyes completely obliterates any thoughts I might have had, that I am the one in control.

  She looks at me as if I am her prey, her submissive. I’ll let her think whatever the fuck she wants to.

  I can’t resist her anymore.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

  Emilia

  I let the scolding water run down my body. The steam and heat of the water reaching deep into my pores, cleansing my mind body and soul of so much emotional baggage and turmoil I hadn’t realized I’d clung on to for so long. Relief is the overwhelming emotion that courses through my veins, making me feel dirty, it should be the last emotion I should be experiencing. Yes, there’s betrayal, lies and so much pain that I want to scream. For some reason though, I won’t allow myself to let the pain paralyze me. I feel like this isn’t the end.

  Call it instinct, or intuition, but I can taste it, just like there’s a distinct sweet, earthy smell in the air before a storm hits.

  There’s more that I don’t know. I’m not an idiot, and I’m well aware that Lukas hasn’t told me everything. Like the fact that he knew my sister and didn’t say a word, I know there’s more to that. He would have no reason to lie unless he knows more—more he doesn’t want me to know—and the worst part is, I just can’t bring myself to care.

  It’s liberating, not having the weight on my chest constantly burdening me—the anxiety and fear I felt for the girl I’d put on a pedestal for too long. I had admired Alexis for so long, living my life revolving around finding her.

  Alexis had made it abundantly clear I was nothing to her. Nothing to my mother.

  What kind of parent just leaves her child behind, knowing the type of man she is leaving her with is a violent, aggressive and abusive addict who has no issue putting his grubby hands on young girls, with the intention of much worse?

  I decide in that moment, to never give anyone power over me. I’d never thought that I had given other people control over me, not up until now. I had hope. That girl was gone, buried with the memory of my sister and relying on the idea of her to make me feel safe and happy somehow.

  I make the promise to put myself first. I’d put everyone else before myself for too long. Fuck them. Now I will take what I want, and no one can stop me. It’s as clear as it ever was, that I only have myself to depend on.

  There is something I do want, someone.

  I can’t fight the laws of attraction anymore, I want him. There’s only one way to test this newfound power within me, and that is to take it back.

  Still
wrapped in my towel, I move from Lukas’s bathroom into his bedroom, finding his eyes fixated on my chest. His eyes dark with arousal, the usual piercing clear blue, now a dark navy that almost matches the color of his bedroom walls. My body hums with electricity as I see what I’m doing to him, his dick hard and pressing against his jeans. The visual does nothing to defuse the wetness spreading between my legs. I am positive my arousal will be dripping down my thighs if he continues to look at me like that.

  I’m not the type of girl who has held out on having sex because I thought some knight in shining armor would swoop in and rescue me, or that it would be love at first sight. But imagine the irony of this situation. I’m not a prude; I just haven’t been interested in anyone enough to want to have their dick inside of me, because even though it might not be one of those moments that I’ll cherish forever, I’ll remember it—so I might as well make it a memory I’m not repulsed at.

  He doesn’t move as I step closer to him, stopping when I’m standing in front of him with only a foot in between us, my toes curling into the thick, soft rug beside the bed in anticipation. I don’t move yet, I just watch him, giving him this time to decide if he wants to escape. With Lukas, you can never predict what he might do.

  Standing over him, I look down through my lashes, and the rush of adrenaline is heady. My pulse accelerates when he stays deadly still, not moving a muscle, as he lets me take the lead.

  The only sound that fills the room is his heavy breathing and my shaky breath. I’d be lying if I said I’m not nervous; I am, but I’ve also never wanted anyone so badly.

  I lift my leg, placing my knee on the side of his thigh, causing the bottom of my towel to slide up my leg and the slit to open a little more, revealing more of my thigh. Lukas’s Adam’s apple bobs underneath his skin as he swallows loudly. Placing my hands on his shoulders, I grab the strong muscle pulled tight beneath his t-shirt, relishing in the touch. Even though it’s not his bare skin, the heat coming from body is addictive. Using his shoulders for balance I lift my other leg, straddling him, but not quite touching.