The Duke's Curse (Legend Book 2)
Page 3
“Some things take time.” The cruel edge to my voice had returned. This would be easier if I could pretend to hate her even though I never could.
“Oh?” From the corner of my eye, I could see her hands rubbing together nervously. I knew she wanted to talk; she wanted to ask more questions about our situation. What confused me was the guilt she emitted. I allowed my eyes to slowly look over at Alexandria. The truth was settled on her face. Her eyes were bright, skin glowing, and something I couldn’t put my finger on—satisfaction? It made my stomach churn.
“I shall leave you to your own devices, Ms. York.” I stood quickly. “Meet me later this afternoon with Lancer and M in the main parlor. We shall talk more of our predicament.”
Alexandria didn’t say anything. There was nothing to say. She knew she couldn’t hide what she had done in my own home from me. I made it to the door before the loud ringing returned. I shook my head, trying to ignore the mess in my head. I blinked hard, my steps slowing as the sound pierced to the point of pain.
“Arghh ... shit ...” White light began to cloud my vision. This was worse than any flash-bang in battle. I fell to my knees, covering my ears with my hands. I heard Alexandria yelling, but her voice was muffled. I saw her face as she held me still as my body jerked violently.
My skull is going to split in half.
I’m going to black out.
Am I having a seizure?
Her face was one of sheer terror, and I saw both M and Lancer bent over me. I reached out and grabbed Lancer’s arm, trying to focus. If I was going to die, he had to protect Alexandria. They were all speaking to me, but I heard nothing but muffled cries. I looked back at Alexandria’s tear-streaked face. How I longed to brush them away. I was always causing her tears.
Pain pitched me forward into blackness so dark that it frightened me.
I couldn’t see.
I could hear my ragged breathing coming at a fast rate. The sound had subsided, but my voice didn’t work. Neither did my legs. I was utterly helpless. A sob escaped my chest. So this was fear.
“What are you so afraid of?” A deep voice resonated all around me.
I blinked, unsure of who was speaking or how to answer. So I was silent. It came again.
“What are you so afraid of?” The voice was more forceful this time. I cringed.
What was I supposed to say?
“I am not afraid!” I couldn’t hide the waver in my voice as I reached for where Exi usually sat in its holster. Crap. I had left the gun in my room.
“You are terrified. So terrified you reach for your weapon. Have I taught you nothing?” The echoing voice resonated through my core. Gritting my teeth, I felt my fear turn to annoyance.
“I demand to know who you are. What is happening to me? Am I dead? Have I blacked out? What is happening?” My legs became unfrozen, and a dim light glowed in front of me. My feet halted.
It was her.
My body reacted with shakes, and my blood ran cold.
What was this?
“You are afraid.” She spoke.
The woman turned her head to look at me. Her long, bronze hair fell down to her waist. The emerald green dress she wore clung to her slender figure. She was on her knees, in a position of praying. Blue eyes held my stare as I saw her hatred reflecting back at me.
What to say?
The tiara resting on her head taunted me. I had placed her in this position. It was my fault. I should have listened to M.
“No—you should have listened to me.” A second, deeper voice wrapped around me as though it had bodily form. “You should have been patient. You should have been kinder. You should have been less selfish. You should have been loyal.”
My jaw set against the wave after wave of guilt that washed over me. “No, stop it. I did everything I was supposed to. I ruled justly and to God’s command.”
The woman rose, tears streaking her cheeks. Oh, how it burned me. To see her cry—I was always making her cry.
The deep spectral voice taunted me. “You ruled for your own advantage. You forsake the one good thing I gave you.”
I saw a cloak replace the gown, and a ring of fire rose higher and higher around her. Her face was full of terror, but she still said nothing.
I reached for her; I could still help her.
“You cannot save her, for it was you who damned her to burn.” The truth shook me.
“No, I just ... She was ... and he ...” I couldn’t form words. My guilt was too great. Dropping to my knees, I sobbed. “I’m sorry ... I’m so sorry ... I ... If you could have just been faithful to me.”
She spoke once more. “I was ... until I saw your heart too far-gone from me. I never wished to stray. I loved you and love you still. Yet you damned me for the same act you had begun upon my first carrying of our child.” Her voice grew resentful. “The same act that bore your bastard. The same bastard who cursed you to hell. The same hell we are now all forced to live.”
Her voice reached to the secret sins I pushed aside.
Her voice pulled the truth to the front of my mind.
Her voice was Alexandria’s voice.
Sorrow plagued her voice. “I was yours, my love. And you were mine.” I glanced back upward at her. She slowly began to fade.
“No! Please! My Lady! My ...” I couldn’t bring myself to say it out loud.
My Queen.
The deeper voice made the ground I stood upon shake. “Do you see now what you have wrought? You cannot hide who you are anymore. You cannot hide from me, and you cannot hide from her.” I struggled to pinpoint the voice. “You have lost faith in all that I can do. You turned to your darkness and stopped believing in the light. What say you—Arthur Pendragon? Who are you? What are you? Are you a Black Duke? Or are you the anointed King of England?”
My body shook, the ringing thundered through my brain relentlessly. Shivering as a cold wind swirled around me, I looked back up through narrow eyes.
“Who are you?” My voice was rough. I hadn’t realized I had been screaming.
“I am, all that I am ...” The voice was fading. I felt a pulse far away, but my heart echoed the beat. I clutched my chest, and I forced myself to my feet. The horrid sound persisted, but I fought to walk through.
“You are all that You are? I demand more! More! Show me all that You can be.” Desperation settled in my chest as the whispering voice turned into many, slipping in and out of my ears. I fought the severe headache and searched for something I could call mine.
“Knock ... Seek ... Find me ...”
I choked on a cry. “I have! I have for so long! Where are you? Why do you leave me in silence?” Tears spilled down my cheeks like a child. “I beg you with everything I am as a man, as Your man, answer me one thing. Just one prayer answered.”
“Oh, you of little faith.”
That voice.
That voice was my voice.
I turned slowly, staring at the body I had to leave to survive in my wretchedness.
The ghost of me.
The ghost of a knight.
The ghost of a king.
Swallowing hard, I whispered, “You are me.”
Nodding, the man’s emerald eyes narrowed. “And you are me.”
My feet refused to move. I recognized this part of me. This sliver, this tiny piece was the missing piece of my twisted puzzle.
I needed this part of me back.
“Just answer me one thing—” I was cut off.
“You have had many prayers answered, Avalon. You are just too focused on the end to see the journey in front of you.” He crossed his arms over his chest.
How I longed to be this person before me again. I’d kill for it. I’d give away my soul to have my sanity back—my faith back.
“All I see is a trail of tears, a grave of lies, and darkness.” Stepping up to my reflection, my eyes tightened with a challenge, “Name one.”
His mouth twitched into a soft smile. “Alexandria.”
I stumbled backward in my head a bit, trying to rationalize his answer. “She hates me. Besides, she loves that boy Lancer. He’s won her again from us! Did you forget? Did you forget her betrayal? Did you forget his betrayal?”
“Yet you offer your home to them both. Why, Avalon?” A thick brow arched. “I can tell you why—you have a heart. You have a soul. That no one can take from you.” His arms released back to his sides. “Yet someone has taken something from you. Me.”
“I still don’t see how she is a blessing.” I sighed, running fingers through my hair.
I never saw him reaching for me. I never saw his hand rise to my neck. It was only when he held me above the ground, choking off my oxygen, did I remember what strength was.
My God, had I been this strong once?
“Stop dwelling on the past! I am the Once. You are the Future!” Tossing me to the ground, he knelt. “Alexandria—she is more than just the reincarnation of our queen, but of so much more. She is pure in heart. She holds a key that even that bastard himself cannot take from her—or us.” His gaze was piercing. “Lancer is who he is, Avalon. Accept that. What I can say is his own interests shall bring a downfall of many hurts to him and you and Alexandria.”
My body stiffened.
I knew that boy was playing with fire.
Setting my jaw, I nodded. “I was aware of that.”
“As for Alexandria, how are you so blind, fool?” His eyebrow quirked upward in amusement. “The more you push her away, the more she is drawn to you. Not to mention—that ring we share—she’s not stupid. You are lucky she sees my face in the dark and not yours. She almost had our secret.”
“I know this,” I growled.
Had I always been such a self-righteous arse in that form?
“No, you weren’t.” He answered my thoughts. “You were a good man—but even good men have their faults.” The sadness in his voice resonated deep in my soul.
“She seems so far away.”
“As do you.”
“What must I do?” His back was to me.
“Try to understand her perspective on this. Remember, she is her own woman; she has no memories as we do. Be kind to her. Be a man she can lean on.” Looking over his shoulder, he winked. “And go to her. Go to her often. I can take care of the rest.”
I felt the threat of surfacing take hold of me.
Everything blurred.
“Wait! How must I regain you?” I fought against the urge to wake.
He paused again, his voice sad. “You must find it within yourself. That is when our first battle will take place. In the meantime, be good to our Lady.”
I wanted to ask so many other questions.
How had we been separated?
Why had we been divided?
Where was he?
Could M help?
All of that faded as I heard the rushing sound of reality flooding back into my ears. Someone was pulling me to the surface from the ocean of sorrow I had drowned in.
My eyes moved rapidly under shut lids. I tried to hear the soft words spoken at my side. I wouldn’t open my eyes yet. I needed to know what was being said.
“Please, don’t take him. Bring him back to me. I beg you ... if you care for me at all anymore, please. You couldn’t bring my parents back but don’t take him ... he’s strange and confusing, but he’s hurting. Bring him back, and I promise to help him break the curse. I swear on my life I will be whatever he needs to be.”
My heart accelerated as Alexandria’s voice finally registered. She held my hand between hers with her forehead resting on the bed.
Who was she speaking to?
“I know we haven’t spoken in a long time, but he means a lot more than I thought he did. Seeing him falter like that ... he’s so strong, it’s terrifying. I’d rather hear him yell at me day in and out and boss me around than go a day without. He’s always been there for me ... God, please ...”
An emotion overwhelmed me at the mention of that name. She was speaking on my behalf. She didn’t strike me as religious or even a believer. She had a good right to turn away from Him after such a tragedy with her parents so young. Yet here she was, at my bedside, holding my hand and fighting for me in the most innocent way.
She is pure of heart. His voice reminded me.
She is the answer to my prayers?
Yes.
Thickness in my throat choked me. Yes, she was. She was everything light in my dark world. We could do this. We would find a way this time. Her words repeating over and over again sent a peaceful feeling running through my body that I hadn’t felt in so long.
“Please, don’t c-cry for me anymore. I’ve caused you e-enough pain, Alexandria.” I found my voice, raw as it was. I turned my head to look at those blue eyes, full of tears, staring at me in awe. I reached to stroke her cheek. I offered her a small smile.
I cleared my throat. “I didn’t know you knew how to pray.” I was only half teasing.
She said nothing, but her eyes told me everything I ever needed to hear. She wrapped her small arms around my neck and leaned on me. My body felt as though a trolley had hit me, but for this moment in time, I would endure it.
Her smell hit me like a wave crashing over my face, waking me more and more to her. I let an arm snake around her waist, rubbing her back.
“It’s all right, Alexandria ... I’m all right,” I whispered into her ear.
“Avalon ...” Alexandria pulled back slightly, her hair veiling us from the world. I let my other hand wipe away tears. She shut her eyes and nuzzled into my touch. My heart kicked alive as another wall chipped away.
“Yes?” I waited.
“This is another moment ...” She tried to give me a brave smile in return.
This woman.
I saw her for the first time just then. I pushed myself up into a sitting position, my hand never leaving her face. My eyes drew her face to memory. Her blue eyes were the blue skies I longed to find. My gray was the storm she sought to tame. I knew what emotion had possessed me—Love.
Pure, raw, undeniable love for this human.
How had I been such an idiot?
Something untwisted in my soul. I rested our foreheads together, fighting the urge to confess everything. I could feel something shifting in her as well.
“We shall have many moments, Alexandria.”
Four
Alexandria
I called Elaine that afternoon to let her know I would be home on Tuesday. I couldn’t leave. Not with Avalon the way he was. Plugging my phone into its charger, I sat on the edge of my bed. Fingers wrapped around the ornate wooden column closest to me.
He knew.
I didn’t have to say a word, he just knew.
Of course, he knows! Avalon knows everything.
Yet ... a part of me wished he didn’t know. Last night had been a strange mix of pain and pleasure. Normally, I never correlated the two together. A part of me still burned for Lancer. To stay wrapped up in his arms forever. The other part of me craved the passion and heat for Arthur—but he wasn’t real.
No ... he is real, he’s just not that man, I reminded myself.
Avalon.
I saw the way he looked at me just before his episode. He had asked me so many questions without realizing it.
Why?
Do I mean nothing to you?
Are you looking to get hurt?
I couldn’t answer him.
A cold chill raced through my body when I saw the strong, stoic duke fall to his knees in agony. He had screamed something about his head exploding and a ringing sound. Then his body seized on him, throwing him into wave after wave of convulsions. I couldn’t hold him down because he was too strong.
All I could do was cry out for M or Lancer. I couldn’t help him at all. Yet in his eyes, I saw the fear. I saw the fear of the unknown, the frank shock of his body revolting against him, and something else.
I saw regret.
What did he regret?
He l
ost consciousness soon after that. Lancer and M carried Avalon to his room. I begged and pleaded to get an ambulance, but both had shut me down. Avalon couldn’t go to the hospital. I thought back to when I stabbed him so recently and how his body had healed itself. He wasn’t normal.
But he is human.
When I had learned he was cursed, a strange mixture of confusion and relief had taken hold. Relief because he wasn’t a Vampire or a Demon and confused because I didn’t really know what cursed meant.
Now, you do.
I was also cursed. Everyone in this estate was cursed—minus the servants under M.
Even Lancer.
I pressed my forehead against the cool mahogany, sighing. Life made no sense. It used to. It had made sense before I had the run-in with the Duke of Avalon.
A knock on the door caused me to jump slightly.
“It’s me.” I heard the low baritone of Lancer from behind it. I stood and walked over, opening the door.
I had to look up to meet his forest green eyes. “How is he? Is he any better?”
Lancer nodded, closing the door behind him. “He’s up. He’s already started walking around, mumbling about things.” He ran a hand through my hair. “How are you doing?”
I forced a smile. “I’m fine. I just got scared. Has that ever happened before?”
“No.” Lancer shook his head. “I’ve never seen Avalon sick a day in my life.”
I walked to the vanity. Fingers brushed along the top of the carved vines of the mirror, staring at my reflection. Hands gripped my shoulders, and I watched Lancer in the glass. His jaw was tense, eyes tight, and lips thinned to a line.
“Are you all right?” I covered one of his hands with mine.
“He told me he gave you a choice.”
My blood grew cold as his grip became heavy on my body. “Oh? What did he say exactly?”
“He said that he released you. What are you going to do, Allie?” Lancer’s eyes were hard on mine. “This is what we needed. This is how we can live our lives the way we want to.”
My heart pounded in my ears. I knew this was going to come. The questions, the pressure. I hated it.