Sacrifice Me: The Complete Season One

by Sarra Cannon

  He had lied about wanting me.

  I thought he wanted me the same way I wanted him. I believed there was something real between us. Something special. I thought there was true passion in the way he kissed me.

  But the whole time, he wanted the same thing those three vampires in the alley behind his club had wanted. He wasn’t attracted to me.

  He was attracted to my blood.

  I was disgusted and heart-sick. I very rarely let myself be vulnerable around men—or anyone, really—and I felt stupid for letting down my guard around him.

  He hadn’t killed me, but he may as well have. I wanted him so badly, and to bring me so close and then take it all away was cruel.

  “You should go,” I said. It came out timid and weak. Just seconds ago, the last thing in the world I wanted was to be apart from him.

  Now, I couldn’t send him away fast enough.

  “We need to talk about this,” he said, taking two steps toward me. “You have to listen to me.”

  “I don’t have to do anything,” I said. My eyes flashed with anger and he stopped moving. I welcomed the anger. Embraced it. The more I embraced the anger, the faster the heartache part of it descended into the darkness. “I want you to get the hell out of here.”

  Rend’s eyes darkened to a deep pool of blackness.

  My legs grew weak and I had to lean against the wall for support. My heart thundered in my chest.

  “Go,” I said again, this time with less conviction and more fear.

  Rend’s hand closed into a tight fist. His jaw tensed as he slammed his fist into the wall, leaving a huge hole. He lifted the side table into the air and threw it to the ground with such force, the floor beneath my feet vibrated.

  Then, in an instant, he had crossed the room to me. His body pressed against mine, crushing me against the wall.

  He brought a hand to my throat and used one finger to turn my head to the side. My bleeding neck was completely exposed to him, and in that moment, I was certain this was the end.

  He leaned in close, his breath hot against my cheek.

  “I didn’t ask for any of this,” he said. “I am not one of them, Franki. Not anymore.”

  I closed my eyes and waited, trembling. My body betrayed me by responding with desire instead of terror. Part of me understood even then that desire was a million times more dangerous.

  “Please,” I said in the tiniest whisper. A single tear slid down my cheek and onto his hand. “Please go.”

  Rend released his hold on my throat and ran his index finger softly along my skin, tracing the path of my tear. I opened my eyes and met his black stare.

  “I’m sorry,” he said. He shook his head and backed away. “I’m so sorry, Franki.”

  For a long moment, our eyes were locked together in mutual regret and sorrow.

  Rend looked away first, his gaze dropping to the floor. He opened his mouth as if to say something more, but then he shook his head and backed away. His body disintegrated into shadow. One minute he was whole and human, and the next, he was nothing more than a cloud of black smoke that hovered for only a moment before slipping through the crack under my door.

  I slid down the wall until I hit the floor. I rested my head on bent knees, hugging them so tightly, I could hardly breathe. I wanted nothing more than to rewind the night. I should have been more careful. I should have protected myself better.

  Not from vampires or demons or even the Devil himself.

  I should have protected myself from love.

  Stop Trying To Guess

  “Franki?”

  Katy shook my arm. I opened my eyes and found her standing above me, concern etched on her face.

  “Are you all right?” she asked, an edge of panic in her voice. “What the hell happened?”

  Oh shit.

  My eyes opened wider and I looked around, seeing the apartment and my torn clothes the way Katy must be seeing it. Our side table was smashed, my books were all over the floor, there was dried blood all over my shirt and neck.

  How the hell was I going to explain this? I sucked at lying, and I couldn’t even begin to think of a good enough explanation for this that didn’t sound insane.

  Even the truth sounded insane.

  I reached for her hand and she pulled me to my feet. I put my arms around her and hugged her as tight as I could. “I need to tell you something,” I said. “But you have to promise me you won’t have me committed to an asylum.”

  Katy pulled away and narrowed her eyes at me. “You’re seriously scaring me here,” she said. “First, you don’t come home from work. You don’t call or text me to say what’s up. Now, I come home to find you curled up asleep on the floor with a blood-stained ripped shirt on? This isn’t like you at all, Franki.”

  “I know,” I said. “I’ve had some serious shit going on the past few days. I promise I’ll explain everything, but can you make a pot of coffee first while I get cleaned up?”

  “Are you on drugs or something?” she asked. Her entire body was tense.

  “I wish,” I muttered.

  Her eyes flashed wide, and I shook my head.

  “No, okay? I’m not on drugs. I don’t want to be on drugs. I don’t plan to do drugs,” I said. “Just do me a favor and stop trying to guess or figure out what’s going on, because trust me, you’ll never in a million years guess this.”

  “Franki—”

  “Coffee,” I said, stepping around her and making my way to the bathroom. If I was really going to attempt to make enough sense of all this to explain it to her, I was going to need that coffee. And I had to get out of this stupid shirt.

  I grabbed a clean washcloth from under the sink and ran the water until it got steaming hot. I carefully wiped the dried blood from my neck, then stared at the two small puncture-wounds. They looked exactly like what you’d expect a vampire bite to look like.

  I must have seen more than a dozen vampire movies in my life, but not once had I ever believed they could really exist. Even being attacked by those three in the alley hadn’t made it feel as real as seeing the actual marks on my skin.

  Rend is a vampire.

  The thought brought on a wave of nausea. I gripped the edge of the sink and took several deep breaths. How could I have missed the fact that he was different?

  I hadn’t, though. Not completely. I’d caught the references to Rend being older than your average human. I’d seen the strange drawings in his office and known he was capable of great magic.

  The truth was I hadn’t allowed myself to put two-and-two together. I let my desire for him cloud my ability to care about anything else.

  The hot water running in the sink had steamed up the mirror. I wiped a section clear and looked at myself in the mirror again. I brought my fingers up to the small teeth marks.

  No matter how much I wanted him, there was no denying this. He had hurt me. Yes, it could have been much worse, but wasn’t this bad enough? The one person I’d been trusting to keep me safe was the most dangerous person on the planet. I’d let my guard down around him, and that was just about worse than anything else. I’d let him into my heart in ways I’d never let a man in before.

  I couldn’t let it happen again.

  “Franki?” Katy knocked on the door to the bathroom. “You can’t seriously be making me wait to hear this. Are you sure you’re okay?”

  I cleared my throat and turned off the water.

  “I’ll be okay,” I said. I rummaged in my makeup bag for a bandaid and placed it over the marks on my neck. She was going to think I was crazy, but I knew I had to tell her the truth. Lying to someone I cared about right now would make me the worst kind of hypocrite.

  “The coffee’s almost ready,” Katy said.

  “I’ll be out in a second,” I said.

  I waited until I heard her walk back toward the kitchen before I slipped out of the bathroom and into my bedroom. I undressed quickly, shedding my bloodied clothes and pulling on a pair of sweat pants and a tan
k top.

  I picked Rend’s white shirt off the floor, thinking how I’d worn it last night to find comfort and feel close to him. And how less than twelve hours later, I wasn’t sure if I ever wanted to see him again.

  I wadded the shirt up and tossed it into the trashcan under my desk.

  I took another deep breath, then made my way out to have coffee with my best friend and tell her about how I’d almost been killed by vampires.

  Not Ever

  Katy sat across from me, her mouth open.

  She hadn’t said a word in the past half hour and she hadn’t taken so much as a sip of her coffee. Mostly, she just stared at me, listening in awe.

  Or horror.

  I wasn’t sure which.

  “When he left, I must have sat on the floor until I finally fell asleep,” I said, coming to the end of my story. I’d told her almost everything from the vampires in the alley to Fallon’s threat and Rend’s visit last night.

  I bit my lip and waited for her to react. Tell me I was crazy. Something.

  Instead, she sat still, her hands gripping her favorite Eiffel Tower coffee mug.

  “Katy, say something. Please.”

  She took a deep breath in and raised her eyebrows. “Are you going to see him again?”

  I pressed my hand against my forehead. “Wait, you heard all that and this is the burning question on your mind?”

  Maybe she was the crazy one here.

  “Franki, do you seriously think I haven’t always known there was something different about you?” she asked in a soft voice. She placed her hand on mine and squeezed. “We’ve been friends for as long as I can remember. I notice things like unexplained gusts of wind when you get angry or the way you flinch every time someone uses the word witch.”

  I shook my head. “Why didn’t you ever say anything?”

  She shrugged and released my hand, finally taking a sip of her coffee. She stuck her tongue out and made a face. “Yuck, this is cold.”

  She stood up, dumped her cup out in the sink, and poured a fresh one.

  “I’m serious,” I said. “You’re telling me you’ve known all this time I was a witch and you never once asked me or confronted me about it?”

  “It was obvious you were sensitive about it,” she said. “The same way I almost never ask you about your mom. It’s just not important if it’s going to hurt you to bring it up.”

  I ran a hand through my knotted hair. “Great. So I’m the last one to find out who I really am,” I mumbled. “Next you’ll be telling me you knew vampires were real.”

  She shrugged again. “It’s not like I’ve ever met one before, but I guess I’m not really that surprised. There’s all kinds of weird shit going on in the world that we never even hear about,” she said. “And I’m definitely not surprised there’s crazy shit going on at Venom. That place is definitely the kind of place where vampires would hang out.”

  I laughed and threw my arms around her neck. “Thank you,” I said.

  “For what?”

  “For making me feel a little bit less crazy,” I said. “I thought you were going to have me committed.”

  She smiled and went back to sit down on the barstool. “Oh, I still think you’re crazy,” she said. “I just don’t think that’s any different from any other day.”

  I rolled my eyes and opened the fridge. “I’m going to make eggs and bacon,” I said. “Are you hungry?”

  “Starving,” she said. “But you still haven’t answered my question.”

  My stomach flipped over. I grabbed the eggs and butter and set them down on the counter next to the stove.

  I hadn’t answered her partly because I had no idea what to say. Was I ever going to see Rend again? Should I go back to the club? Or just go back to my life before Venom?

  As if I could.

  “You really care about this guy, don’t you?”

  I groaned and put my hands over my face. “Is it that obvious?”

  “As long as I’ve known you, I’ve never seen you this twisted up over someone,” she said. “It just sucks he’s a vampire.”

  I laughed, but kind of wanted to cry at the same time. “Yes. Yes it does.” I cracked the eggs into a bowl and poured a little bit of milk inside. “The thing is, I honestly wasn’t as hurt by the fact that he’d tried to kill me as I was by the fact that he lied to me.”

  “Did he ever tell you he wasn’t a vampire?”

  “Well, no, but leaving it out is just as bad, right?”

  Katy leaned over the counter. “It’s not exactly a lie,” she said. “It’s just not telling the whole truth. You can’t expect a guy to confess his deepest, darkest secrets to you the second you meet.”

  “I can if it’s a secret that could put me in danger.”

  She nodded. “Maybe.”

  My eyes widened and I put a hand on my hip. “Are you taking his side, here?”

  Katy held her hands up in defense. “Hey, you know I’m always on your side,” she said. “I’m just saying that it sounds to me as if he’s been risking a lot to keep you safe. I don’t think he would intentionally turn around and put you in danger.”

  “What does that even mean? If he’s a vampire, he should have known he was putting me in danger by even coming up here.”

  “Not necessarily,” she said. “Hear me out. The girls at the club were quick to tell you Rend was off-limits, right? They probably all already know what he is and what he’s capable of when he loses control. Only, the thing is, he doesn’t normally lose control. He’s usually the poster-child for control, am I right?”

  I shrugged and turned back to the scrambled eggs.

  “He’s probably off-limits to most of the women there because he refuses to allow himself to lose control,” she said. “Only, he couldn’t resist you and he went too far.”

  Her words sparked the most annoying little feeling of hope deep inside me.

  Part of me desperately wanted to believe I was nothing special to him. Everything would be so much easier—for both of us—if he saw me as just another witch with delicious blood running through her veins. It was better if I could make myself believe he didn’t care for me. If I could just stay angry with him, my heart was safe.

  But hope had sparked and I knew there was nothing I could do to kill it now.

  “Couldn’t resist me?” I asked. “Or just couldn’t resist my blood?”

  She rolled her eyes and made a clicking sound with her tongue. “How many witches does he work with on a daily basis? How many witches come in and out of that bar every single night? Hundreds? He’s surrounded by the scent of powerful blood every day of his life and somehow, he manages to maintain control. If there wasn’t something different about you, he wouldn’t have had any trouble resisting you.”

  I shook my head and sighed. “Maybe I’m different some other way, you know? Maybe my blood is just more potent or something? Why else would this other guy—the Devil—be after me?”

  Katy bit her lip. “I don’t know for sure, but he scares me a lot more than Rend does,” she said. “And you’ve never seen him?”

  “No, just his lackey or whatever you would call him,” I said. “Rend said the Devil isn’t allowed in his club at all.”

  I scooped the finished eggs into a large bowl and doused them in salt. My mind was spinning. I definitely wasn’t expecting Katy to believe me so easily, much less start applying her typical logic to the situation.

  “You have to go back there,” she said, sneaking a piece of bacon from the plate I’d set on the counter.

  “What? Why?”

  “Because regardless of what happened between you and Rend last night, he’s still your best chance of surviving whatever this other guy has planned for you,” she said. “Plus, you have way too many questions to turn your back on him so fast.”

  I leaned against the counter and nodded. She was right. Life as I knew it was over forever. There was no more denying who—or what—I was. Turning my back on Venom was th
e same as turning my back on myself. I knew Venom was my best chance at really figuring out who I was and where I came from.

  “What would I do without you?” I asked her, taking a piece of bacon for myself.

  Katy smiled and looked up toward the ceiling. “I don’t know. Probably make all the wrong decisions and end up an old maid who never got it on with a hot vampire.”

  I threw the rest of my bacon at her, hitting her squarely on the nose. “I did not get it on with a vampire,” I protested.

  She laughed and picked up the thrown bacon. She tossed it into her mouth. “Not yet,” she said.

  “Not ever,” I mumbled, turning back to grab two plates from the cupboard.

  Still, despite my protests, my stomach fluttered.

  “I’ll go back,” I said. “But only because I need answers.”

  My fingertips traced the outline of the Bandaid on my neck, and I shivered at the thought of someday finishing what Rend and I had started last night.

  Would I be so lucky next time? Would I even survive a next time?

  I closed my eyes and started the grueling work of cleaning up the mess we’d made of the apartment. Deep inside, I started the more taxing work of rebuilding the wall around my heart. The one Rend had managed to destroy with a single kiss.

  Extreme Restraint

  I stood in the drizzling rain outside Venom for a few minutes before going inside.

  I felt like the second everyone saw me, they would know. My feelings for Rend would show in my face, and they would all feel sorry for me.

  Poor girl. We told her he was off-limits. She really believed she was special.

  How humiliating.

  And worse than the humiliation of it all was having to be close to Rend, knowing I could never be with him. It was going to be torture.

  I almost turned around and ran back to the ’L’, but I was determined to be strong. Let them laugh. I deserved it for believing there was something real between us when everyone had warned me against it.

  I didn’t care what Katy said. To Rend, I was just another tasty witch. He’d gotten too close and had shown his true nature. End of story. I had to believe that if I was going to make it through my shift tonight.