Fearless (Broken Love Book 5)

by B. B. Reid

  Once I finished dressing, I used the full-length mirror in the corner and stared at my reflection. Despite how bad I felt about Keiran missing on my birthday, the dress made me feel beautiful and wiped away every negative feeling I’d had since waking up.

  That was until I studied how the gown teased the tops of my feet and realized I had no shoes that would go well with the dress. I hurried for the door and opened them, only to find Dash standing there, holding up the familiar nude wedges Keiran bought me for our first Valentine’s date.

  “Wha—How did you get these?”

  “Magic happens on special days like these. You look beautiful,” he whispered.

  “Thank you.” I took the shoes and studied them. They were hardly the best option for the dress. “They don’t really go.”

  “He insisted,” Dash simply said and kissed me on my forehead before sauntering away. I slid the shoes on and followed after him. Everyone was waiting downstairs when I made it down. Willow stood a few feet away, and when she saw me, she started crying for some reason. I tried to go to her, but Keenan pulled me in the opposite direction.

  “Hormones,” he muttered and led me out the door. I began to feel a nervous flutter as we drove away in separate cars. Keenan and Sheldon drove me while Dash and Willow followed behind with Kennedy and Haven. I looked down, my hands shaking in my lap, and took a deep breath.

  God, get it together. It was only breakfast.

  I told myself I was only upset because I still hadn’t heard from Keiran.

  I concentrated on the clear summer sky and thought about classes that would be starting in a few days. The arrests and the time spent in jail caused me to flunk out of my summer courses, so I was now behind a quarter to graduation.

  The car slowed to a stop, jolting me from my distraction when I realized we were at the playground. I was no longer afraid of this place and the bad memory from sixteen years ago, but it didn’t mean I forgot everything it represented.

  The car door opened and I found Jackson standing there with his hand outstretched.

  What the fuck was going on?

  I took his hand and was even more freaked out when I saw Aunt Carissa standing by with her hands over her mouth and crying.

  This was turning out to be one emotional breakfast. I had no idea my birthday meant so much to them. I felt inadequate because I had no idea what to say. To be honest, all I wanted to do was to go back and crawl under the covers and wait for Keiran to remember me.

  “You guys are back.” I hugged Jackson and then Aunt Carissa, who finally managed to stop crying long enough to speak.

  “I couldn’t miss this.”

  “And we need to talk later,” Jackson added in a stern voice. I knew they must have heard about my arrests by now. Over the years, he willingly and wholeheartedly took on a father figure role. He really was a good guy, and I think even Keiran respected him. “But first,” he held up his arm for me to take, “will you allow me the honor?”

  “Uh, sure.” I took his arm and looked around but everyone had already disappeared. He started walking me across the playground, and as we passed the swings and sandboxes, I inhaled as I realized we were heading for the monkey bars. “Is this where we’re having breakfast?” I frowned because Dash had said it was a really nice restaurant. “The picnic tables are over—”

  My legs stopped working, and I sucked in a sharp breath when I saw the tall, familiar figure a short distance away.

  Keiran stood under the monkey bars, which were decorated with blue and white flowers. A trail of flowers made a small path from where I now stood all the way to him. Dash, Keenan, and Q stood with him while Willow, Sheldon, Di, and Jesse stood to his left. A man dressed as a priest also waited at the end, and that’s when my brain finally caught up.

  OH.

  Chapter Thirty

  KEIRAN

  I stood under the monkey bars that Dash and Keenan helped me turn into our altar and tried not to look as nervous as I felt. It took three torturous days of sad blue eyes watching and wondering if I was withdrawing from her. I couldn’t tell her that I had been planning the start of our future.

  I realized I never even proposed to her, but there was no fucking way I could wait long enough for her to plan a wedding once I got my ring on her finger.

  I guess I had Dash and Haven to thank for that.

  The day he was born, I felt more than saw the instant bond between father and son. While everyone fussed over the baby, I watched Dash.

  He gazed down at his son, and no matter what went on in that room, he never took his eyes from him, but then he glanced at me so suddenly, I felt like I had been intruding on an inmate moment. But then he silently showed me everything he was feeling through his tear glistened eyes. The connection was so brief because his gaze snapped back almost frantically to Haven, and he continued to watch over him.

  He showed me something in that brief moment and quite possibly saved my life.

  I glanced at my watch again.

  She should be here by now.

  “Calm down,” Q said and clapped me on the back. “They’ll get her here.”

  I had no doubt they would get her here, but what if she ran once she did? What if she decided my emotional baggage was too much to ride out? What if—

  “Here they come,” Di announced. She stood in a modest, pale blue dress with her hair down and her face free of makeup. She looked much younger and innocent without it—like there weren’t ten lifetimes of hell built up beneath the surface.

  I turned my attention to my small crowd of friends approaching and focused on getting through this. I was going to marry Lake Monroe today and truly surrender myself to her.

  “Jackson and her aunt have her held up,” Keenan stated as they all took their spots. I nodded and watched the opening where she would appear soon if she didn’t catch on and run for the hills.

  I was beginning to grow impatient and had to force the urge to go after her. When she finally appeared on Jackson’s arm and stopped, I found myself fighting for control once more.

  Please don’t run.

  Please don’t run.

  Please don’t—

  She took a step forward and then stopped. She was too far for me to see her expression, but I knew she had eyes for only me. Every hair on my body was raised as it always did whenever she looked at me. Before long, she was standing in front of me with tears flowing freely down her beautiful face.

  “Keiran,” she hiccupped and struggled to breathe. “What is this?”

  I took her face in my hands and brought her close so only she could hear. “This is the day we meet for the first time and the rest of forever.”

  “I still don’t understand,” she cried, so I kissed her lips and prepared myself for what came next.

  “You promised me a long time ago that when it was all over, you’d bring me to my knees.” I let go of her face and took her hand. “I hope one will do.”

  I lowered myself to one knee and looked her in her eyes. “You chased away the monsters and became my reason—my forever. I’m yours, Lake Monroe. Will you marry me today?”

  “Yes, I fucking will,” she screamed. Just then, a light showering of flower petals rained down on us, and when she looked up, her breath caught. Buddy sat on the edge of the monkey bars with a handful flowers, sprinkling them over us. “Buddy!”

  “You were my hero.” He grinned.

  She smiled up at him and then turned to face me, and I nodded at the priest to begin. “We are gathered together to celebrate the very special love between bride and groom, by joining them in marriage…”

  Epilogue

  LAKE

  ELEVEN MONTHS LATER

  During almost a year of wedded bliss, a lot has happened. I graduated with my Masters in Education and accepted a job in Six Forks at Bainbridge Elementary. Keiran sold his part of the business back to Jesse and followed me. He’s been volunteering his time to help coach the basketball team at Bainbridge High and started an a
fter-school little league for younger kids. He didn’t seem to be in a rush to figure out what to do with the rest of his life, and when he opened a joint account, I realized why. The nosy wife in me reared its curious head, and I couldn’t believe how much cash he was sitting on.

  When we first moved back to Six Forks, we stayed with Keenan and Sheldon while Keiran and I scoped out a home to buy, which ended up the next street over from theirs anyway. They had run off to elope a few months after we married when Keenan decided he wasn’t taking any more chances. She, in turn, convinced Keenan she wanted to stay local despite his earlier ruling on her attending med school in California as planned.

  Today was the best day of them all because today my best friend would marry the love of her life. Shortly after Haven was born, they moved into a beautiful home that Dash had built for their family. It was then we discovered where Dash had been hiding all of the baby stuff he had purchased. Willow, Sheldon, and I—and Keenan—all cried at the sight of the beautiful nursery.

  Everything was perfect.

  Until reality crash-landed and I learned our world was about to get a little bigger. I had been helping Willow with her dress when a wave of nausea overcame me, and I nearly puked all over her ivory gown. It was the most subtle thing I’d ever seen her wear, and I almost ruined it.

  “Should I go get Keiran?” Sheldon asked after I finally stopped vomiting. I shook my head and closed my eyes as I leaned over the toilet. He was the last person I needed to see right now. I still hadn’t found a way to tell him.

  God.

  I thought we’d slain all his demons.

  “I just need to sit down, I think.” She nodded and I followed her back out into the church hallway. Keenan walked by as the door closed behind us but stopped when he noticed my face.

  “Whoa. Why do you look like that?” he frowned.

  “Honey, have a brain. She’s sick and you’re not being nice.”

  “Sick?” He stroked his chin and stared at me for a long moment. “Are you sure you aren’t pregnant?”

  Sheldon’ stiffened at the same time I did. Her head whipped around to face me, and her jaw dropped. I felt as if my tongue had become lodged in my throat.

  “I—I, uh…” I couldn’t form words but it didn’t matter because he smirked and walked away.

  “Are you?” Sheldon shrieked. I could only nod and stare down a spot on the floor. “Does Keiran know?”

  “No,” I croaked. “I don’t think I can tell him.”

  “What are you afraid of?”

  “I’ll lose him.” It was the only thing I was afraid of now.

  “That’s not possible.”

  The door to Willow’s dressing room opened, and she poked her head out. Her curls had been whipped and beaten into shaped by her mother and pulled back to show off the angelic lines of her face, which was now pulled down with concern.

  “What’s going on?”

  Neither of us responded though Sheldon pulled us inside and shut the door. “Tell her,” she nudged when the silence stretched too long.

  “I’m pregnant.”

  Moisture immediately pooled in Willow’s eyes, and then she grabbed and pulled me into a tight hug. “Is this for real?”

  “I don’t know what to do,” I cried and she pulled me tighter.

  “Do you truly believe he wouldn’t be happy?”

  “He’ll be terrified.” Just then, the door shook and a loud boom echoed around us.

  “What the—”

  “Baby, open up.” I recognized the voice instantly and felt my blood drain. I was rooted to the spot. Breathing was no longer an option.

  Sheldon growled beside me and stormed for the door. “I swear if Keenan told—” She ripped open the door and was met by my anxious husband who rudely pushed past her. Dash was behind him but she said, “You can’t come in here,” and slammed the door in his face.

  “Keenan said you weren’t feeling well.” Keiran reached out and grabbed my waist to pull me close. He tucked his chin low and spoke against the side of my face. “What’s wrong?” His voice was tender with fear.

  “I threw up.”

  “Why?” The guttural sound of his voice broke me, and I was pretty certain he already knew.

  “Because I’m pregnant,” I stated matter of factly and looked up to meet his eyes. I needed to see his true feelings. I was surprised to find him smiling. “Wait… Why are you smiling?”

  “Actually, I think we should give you guys a moment,” Sheldon cut in and grabbed Willow’s hand. “But don’t take too long. The wedding starts in fifteen.” She checked to make sure the coast was clear and then they left.

  “You’re smiling,” I repeated as soon as the door was closed.

  “I was beginning to think my soldiers were weaker than Keenan’s.”

  “Explain please.” My tone was short because this was not the reaction I was expecting. He should be yelling and making threats and storming out.

  Keiran doesn’t want kids.

  “He’s been bragging how he got Sheldon knocked up even though she was on birth control.”

  “I’m still not following.”

  He swallowed hard and suddenly looked very serious. “I want this.”

  “No,” I argued more out of confusion than denial. “You don’t want kids. You’re scared—” I didn’t get to finish because he had placed his palm on my stomach but stared down at his hand confused.

  “I’m fucking terrified.”

  I didn’t know how to respond because he wasn’t making sense.

  “So why?”

  “I promised to give you everything, and I know this is what you want. So, I thought maybe I could make that sacrifice.”

  “That’s not a reason to face your fears. I don’t want a family to be a sacrifice.”

  “I thought so, too.”

  “Then why!” I yelled frustrated and stepped back. I wanted to believe him. I wanted a family with him.

  But not if my happiness was a sacrifice that he couldn’t live with.

  “Haven loves Dash and Dash loves him back. He’s. Just. His. Son.”

  “Keiran, baby, explain a little better,” I pleaded. I felt just as desperate as the look in his eyes.

  “I got a call from Daniel after we were married. They wanted me to know the inheritance is still in place. If I have a son, I’ll inherit.”

  “My son will not be a meal ticket.”

  “I’m glad you said that because I told him if I ever did have a son, any cent given to me will be donated or burned. He seemed to understand.”

  “So what does this mean?”

  “It means I’m not Mitch, and I never will be. I know that now. I want to be a father.”

  “What if one day you wake up hating me, or I wake up one day and you’re gone?”

  He reached out for me and I went. He needed to touch me just as much I needed him to but he didn’t stop there. He kissed my lips until I softened against him. “That’s never going to happen. Even when I hated you, being without you wasn’t something I could do. It’s you and me forever, wife. Get used to it.” I laughed until he lowered to his knees and looked up at me. “Do you trust me with our kid?”

  My relief over his willingness to give our family a try was nothing compared to how I weakened at the humbled look in his eyes. “I trust you,” I found myself saying easier than ever.

  He kissed my stomach through the dress, and I wanted nothing more than for him to continue, but a knock on the door pulled us apart. He glanced at his watch and cursed.

  “The wedding is about to start.” When he opened the door, we found Willow standing on the other side with her arms crossed. “Shouldn’t you be getting ready to walk down the aisle?” he joked.

  “In a minute… Is everything cool?” she grilled with her threatening glare on Keiran. He snorted and ignored her to wrap his arm around my waist and he pulled me in front of him. They had grown closer and by closer, I meant they agreed they were each equally importan
t to me. Willow still tried to assert dominance over him, though, and Keiran still found it amusing.

  “We’re going to have a baby.”

  KEIRAN

  NINE YEARS LATER

  “Phee. What is this?” I held up my favorite ball with flower stickers all over the surface. I almost wept when I saw it. Keenan and Dash gave me shit the entire practice after I’d pulled out my ‘pretty ball.’ A few years ago I took over coaching the boys high school basketball team with the help of Keenan and Dash during Saturday morning practice.

  “What do you mean, daddy?”

  “What do you mean, what do I mean?”

  “I mean,” she emphasized, “what do you mean?”

  “Phee.” I pinched the bridge of my nose and prayed for patience. The little shit maintained a serious expression even though I was sure she was fucking with me. The universe cursed me the day he gave her my personality and her mother’s looks. Maybe it was payback for the shit I gave as a kid.

  At only seven years old, she was a fucking nightmare.

  “Daddy, I just wanted to make it better. Don’t you like it?”

  “No.”

  “Well, I like it,” she stated and walked past me, silently ending the conversation. I spun in time to see her and her evil pigtails leave her room.

  Oh, hell no.

  “Sophia!” I roared, following behind her. She must have run off because the hall was empty.

  Somewhere near, I heard a sigh and the patient voice of my wife asking Phee what she’d done now. I followed the sound of their voices and found them in our bedroom. Lake was in bed where I left her this morning as she breastfed Nicky. He was only four weeks old and ate more than three grown men. I wasn’t complaining, though. Each time I watched her feed him, it only made me want to breed her again.

  One more.

  And then I promised her I’d quit.

  I eyed Phee faking fear and attempting to hide against her mother’s side. Despite how crazy she made me, I wanted another princess. Maybe one gentle like her mother. This one was all me. I’d never say it out loud, and fuck whoever disapproved, but she was my favorite. I’d just never tell her so.