Dying To Live

by Sam Carter

  “Actually, I can’t. And I’m not sure I want to.”

  Just as Cole was about to knock on the door, it flung open and Fang came bounding out. He was actually skipping with delight as he gave Cole a big bear hug. He was not exactly what Clara pictured when she thought of someone named Fang. There was no spiky hair or face tattoos. There wasn’t jewelry coming from every part of his body. He looked like someone who worked in banking, not snake farming. He was proof you couldn’t judge a book by its cover, or its name, in his case.

  “Cole. It has been way too long, my friend.” Once their very manly hug had ended, Fang saw that Cole was not alone. “Who is this exquisite creature, and why have you been keeping her all to yourself?” Clara wasn’t sure if she should roll her eyes or blush. Blush won out, however, and there was nothing wrong with a compliment. Especially one so true.

  “Clara. And you aren’t too bad yourself.” Now Fang blushed a little.

  “I’m going to throw up. Everywhere. Especially on your white couch over there. Can we please come in and move past this?”

  “How do you expect me to move past this sweet being?” Fang grabbed Clara by the hand. Cole gagged.

  “By shutting up and remembering why we are here.”

  “Fine. Always the rule-keeper, Cole. Let’s go get the antivenom.” Yes, the antivenom. For the kids. That was much more important than some guy she’d just met. She would just have to come back for a visit.

  They walked through Fang’s massive home and into the backyard. As soon as they set foot outside, Clara’s skin began to crawl. There were snakes everywhere—on trees, in the grass, on top of the house. And she was sure they were crawling all over her skin, too.

  “Don’t worry. You are perfectly safe. Stay on this path and you won’t disturb them. Snakes don’t get enough credit for how smart they are. They are very well-trained. They know their boundaries.”

  Clara planted herself right in the middle of this lifesaving path and walked straight as an arrow while Cole and Fang laughed and joked like they weren’t in the middle of a death trap. She would not even allow her head to swivel to the side. She just wanted to get the antivenom and get out of there. No matter how cute Fang was.

  They walked into a little cabin in the middle of the huge yard. The place was covered in two things: pictures of Fang with wild animals from all over the world, and vials upon vials of liquid.

  “Here we are. All the antivenom I’ve got.”

  “This is it? You could run out any day if you’re not careful,” Clara said eyes wide open.

  “You can never be too safe. Plus, it takes forever to make some. You’ve got to milk the snake of its venom.”

  “Milk the who of what?” Clara needed to get back to the city where there was no milking of anything. Ever. “Snakes have milk? Snakes have nipples?”

  “Yeah, they’ve got milk, but it comes from their teeth. Then you inject it into a horse, diluted of course, and about two to three months later the horse has produced antibodies that fight the venom. After some purification of the horse’s blood, voila! You’ve got your antivenom.”

  Clara was both fascinated and terrified. The wonders of science would never cease to amaze her. Miracles every day.

  “Awesome. So, where’s the stuff from the coastal taipan?” Cole was straight business right now. Clara was impressed.

  “Coastal taipan? I thought you said inland taipan. Shoot.”

  “Shoot? Please tell me you have antivenom for the coastal, too.”

  “I do. Just not as much. Give me a second. I just need to find it.”

  Fang pulled out a ladder and started to climb. When he got about halfway up, he stopped and started moving some tubes around. Clara was beginning to get nervous. Maybe he didn’t have any. Maybe there wasn’t any hope for these kids.

  “Found it!” Fang yelled. “I knew I had some.” He climbed down the ladder, filled a box with some vials, and handed it to Cole.

  “How much is in here?” Cole asked as he looked through the box.

  “Enough for ten kids. You remember how to use it, right?”

  “I do. But, how much did you say again? It looks like a lot more in here.”

  “There are about fifty vials in there. Based on what you told me about the amount of venom and the time it’s been in the kids, they will need five each. Minimum.”

  Clara looked at Cole as they both realized what this meant. This couldn’t be happening. There were twelve kids that had been injected with the venom, and with Cole’s own stash, they only had enough to save eleven.

  Chapter 52

  Harlan was afraid to look back at Alex. Afraid that if he did, Alex would know Harlan had figured out who he was. That Dr. Alex James, a man Harlan had worked closely with for almost ten years, a man who had sworn an oath to take care of his patients, was the voice. He was the one terrorizing Harlan and so many others. And, most importantly, he was the one who was killing these patients. All these innocent kids. It didn’t make sense.

  Harlan began to walk again and this time, he didn’t stop until he made it to his office. He needed a few minutes of peace and quiet. He needed to figure out what was going on and what his next steps would be. Nothing in his life had prepared him for something like this. Nothing at all.

  What would possess Alex to do something like this? He was never happy and most days he did not seem to enjoy his line of work. He treated the staff poorly and often fought with other doctors. But the second he walked into a patient’s room, he was a different person. Kind and compassionate. Decisive and confident. Everything a doctor should be, until he walked out of the room again.

  The one constant complaint that Alex had was lack of credit. He never felt like anyone paid attention to the work he did. How many medical staff meetings had he rolled his eyes in or made an offhand comment when someone was praised? Too many to count. But how many times had Alex been called out in front of the staff for excellent work? Harlan couldn’t think of one. Not a single time.

  Harlan began to feel guilt all over his body. Had he helped create this monster Alex had become? Had his lack of support and acknowledgment caused Alex to do what he did? What if he had just been kinder or pointed out when Alex had done something fantastic? Would it have been so hard to give credit where credit was due?

  Harlan was doing it again. Just like Cole had said, he was taking the blame for someone else’s actions. He knew it didn’t make sense, but no matter how hard he tried, he still felt he had pushed Alex to become so desperate for attention that he would do all of this.

  That was enough wallowing in self-pity. There was no time for this. Harlan had an important piece of the puzzle figured out. He knew who the voice was. He was now a step ahead of the game, and this would help him to save his patients.

  But, Harlan thought, how would he even get to them? Alex would be there every step of the way, wouldn’t he? He would never allow Harlan to be alone, let alone inject them with antivenom.

  Maybe if he knew why Alex was doing this, what his motivation was. That fact alone would help a great deal. Then he could use it against him when it was time to get to distribute the cure. Now he just needed to figure that out. That might be the hardest thing he had to figure out yet—the motivation of a madman.

  Harlan’s phone rang, a number he didn’t recognize. Who could this call be from now?

  “Hello?” Harlan answered hoping it wasn’t another part of Alex’s game or another call from the cops.

  “Hi, Harlan.” It was Lucy. This was a phone call he was glad to be getting.

  “Lucy? What’s going on? Why aren’t you sleeping?”

  “I can’t sleep. Not with everything going on. Every time I close my eyes, I see Rex. I see the kids. It’s horrible.”

  “I know. I’m sorry. But you need to sleep.” Harlan realized the irony in this, seeing that he hadn’t slept a moment the past twenty-four hours.

  “I know I need to, but how am I supposed to do that? You’re the doctor. T
ell me. What do I do?”

  “Take some drugs?” He waited for her laugh. She didn’t. No amount of joking would be able to break this level of stress.

  “I can’t just sit at home and wait. You said you would need my help. Can I help you now?” While there was still shakiness in her voice, as she asked to come in, she sounded stronger. But he couldn’t ask her to come in now. Not in her current state. Not with Alex walking around.

  “I will. But not until you rest. Without that you won’t be able to give these kids the attention they need.” He was lying. He knew she could come in and work on little sleep. She had before, and she could do it now. But he felt a need to protect her, to keep her safe, which was something he hadn’t felt since Emily. And that terrified him.

  He could hear her start to cry. “Lucy, I need you to be ok. I can’t explain it, but I do. I will call once I need you here. I promise.”

  “Ok. Thank you.” There was some strength back in her voice now—his words of needing her to be ok had filled her soul with what it had lost that day. “Thank you for caring about me.”

  Confused by what had just happened, by what he was feeling right now, Harlan pushed the button to end the call. The number he hadn’t seen before, Lucy’s number, flashed across the screen. This made him stop and think about all the calls he had received from Alex over the last day. What was the number on the caller ID?

  He opened the phone and looked at his received calls. “Unknown caller.” Dang. Dead end. He was hoping to use that to get hard evidence that Alex was the voice and use that to his advantage. He would have to come up with another way.

  Wait, Harlan thought. The text messages. He was positive he couldn’t receive texts from a blocked number. There had to be something there.

  He found the texts from just a few hours ago. Each had the same number attached to it. This was it. Except, yet another except for the day, it wasn’t a string of ten numbers like a normal phone number. Why would it be? It was seventeen numbers. And letters. It wasn’t something he could use at all.

  Needing to clear his brain and start over, Harlan decided to check his email. Maybe that would distract him enough to have a clear thought again.

  There wasn’t much in there, thank goodness. He hated reading his work email. It was usually just a bunch of meeting reminders, fundraiser announcements, and notices from IT about their medical records being down or upgraded—which was another way of saying, “Sorry for all the shortcuts you’ve made to make your job easier. They’re all gone.”

  That’s what it mostly was today, too. One was from Joe Graffis, the best IT guy Harlan had ever worked with. Dude knew his way around technology. He had fixed Harlan’s home computer and cell phone on numerous occasions. He was a lifesaver.

  That was it. Joe. He could take the phone to Joe, and he could do whatever it was that he did and learn Alex’s number.

  Harlan hurriedly walked to the basement offices and knocked on the door outside of IT. It was a little after 8:00, so he hoped that meant Joe was already in. He was probably being optimistic; these guys were never here at 8:00, but he thought he would try.

  “Dr. Allred. I’m guessing you’re here about the email I sent you?” Joe was here. And the email Harlan saw wasn’t some notice, it was an email with something for him. Now he wished he had read it.

  “Um, no. Was it something important?”

  “Not really. We are getting new laptops and wanted you to get first dibs.”

  “Thanks for thinking of me. That would be perfect. I could use something new.”

  “I wasn’t just thinking of you. These computers will be better protected and harder to break. This is more for me not having to help you so much when you screw things up.”

  “I would call you a jerk, but you’re right. I do take a lot of your time.” That was an understatement. Harlan was the king of viruses, pushing the wrong key, and making something explode.

  “I’ll get you first on the list then. What else do you need?”

  “It’s a strange question,” Harlan said as he closed and locked the door behind him. “Can you hack into a phone and figure out a number?”

  “Depends on the phone and how much info you’ve got. The older the phone the better. They are not quite as secure.”

  Harlan pulled out the phone and handed it to Joe. “This I can do. I believe this is a Motorola from about ten years ago. What do you need me to look for?”

  “Before we go any further, this doesn’t leave the room, got it? Don’t say a word.” Harlan realized how cliché that sounded, but he needed to say it. He trusted Joe, but he wanted to make sure.

  “You got it. It’s just you and me, Doc.”

  “It’s in the text messages. There are two from a strange number that uses both numbers and letters. I’ve never seen anything like it before.”

  Joe’s eyes widened as he looked at the number. Harlan couldn’t tell if it was a good look or not. Maybe this really would be a dead end.

  “It has been forever since I’ve seen something like this. Back in my past life, before I went legit, these used to come up all the time. I even used these to get away with, um, stuff.” Joe often alluded to this past life. At some point, Harlan was going to get him to go into more details.

  “Is that a good or bad thing? Can you break it?”

  “It’s a good thing. It won’t be easy, only because it’s been a few years, but I can break it.”

  “Great. How fast can you have it done?”

  “I will make it my top priority. Give me an hour. Tops. I’ll text you on your cell when I’m done.”

  Harlan felt a rush of hope as he walked out of Joe’s office. Something he hadn’t felt for a long time.

  That hope lasted until he reached the fourth floor of the hospital and heard the unmistakable screams of Stacy coming down the hall.

  Chapter 53

  Harlan sprinted down the hall faster than he had run in his life. Had anyone gotten in his way, he would have plowed them over without a second thought. He only had two thoughts during that short trip. First, to get there as fast as he could. Second, where in the world were Cole and Clara? The kids couldn’t wait much longer.

  As he entered Stacy’s room, he could tell something was wrong beyond her screaming and thrashing around like she was running away from some sort of monster. Something was out of place.

  “Where’s her dad? Where is Stacy’s dad?” The two nurses in the room turned and looked at him. Neither seemed to have any idea what he was talking about. Harlan could feel his blood boiling with frustration, and while he promised himself he would never yell at a nurse, he was getting pretty dang close. Luckily, they were saved by Clarence, another RN, entering the room.

  “He went to get something to eat and take a walk. I thought it was a good idea.”

  “It was a great idea. You all did great. Now, what is going on? Why is Stacy screaming?”

  “We don’t know.” This time Lydia spoke up. “She’s been sleeping, and now she’s screaming. It doesn’t seem to be pain, but something else. She hasn’t even woken up through all of it.”

  The nightmares. She was in the middle of one of her nightmares. She was running away from a monster. The horrible monster of reliving her mother’s death over and over again.

  “I’ll take it from here.” All three nurses looked at him, convinced he had lost his mind. “I’m serious. I’ll call if I need you. And please close the door on your way out.”

  Harlan sat down next to Stacy and grabbed her hand. This did not calm her down, but it was a start. He had to do something more.

  He knew her favorite song, at least a few years ago, was “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star.” Maybe she had grown up and moved past this song, but it was all he could think of. So he cleared his throat, hoped no one was standing within earshot, and sang.

  Twinkle, twinkle, little star,

  A tear rolled down Harlan’s cheek. This little girl was that star.

  How I wonder what you are
.

  What are you? Strong. Stronger than anyone Harlan had ever met.

  Up above the world so high,

  That was Stacy. Always watching over others, even in her struggles.

  Like a diamond in the sky.

  The tears were flowing now. The world needed more diamonds like her.

  Twinkle, twinkle, little star, how I wonder what you are.

  Through his tears, Harlan hadn’t noticed Stacy had stopped screaming and was perfectly still.

  “You remembered that’s my favorite song. Thank you, Dr. Allred.” She looked up at him, wiped away a tear, and smiled.

  “What are doctors for?” Harlan smiled back. “Are you ok now, Stacy?”

  “I guess. The nightmare is so horrible. And so clear now. I can see everything. Every detail.”

  “Your dad told me that. I’m sorry.” He wanted to ask her if that meant she could see the person who had caused the accident, but he knew it wasn’t his place. His place was to heal her. That was all.

  “How have you been feeling? Any more pain?”

  “Lots. And it doesn’t go away like it used to. Do you know what’s wrong? That other doctor doesn’t seem to know anything. Or care.”

  And the other doctor didn’t care. He was the one causing this. He was the reason she was here.

  “We are getting close. I really believe we are.” And he did, but he was afraid they were running out of time. It was close to 9:00 now. He was sure that meant they had less than four hours left.

  “I knew it. I’ve been telling everyone you would figure it out.”

  “Thanks for the faith in me, kiddo,” Harlan said as he ruffled her hair. Kids and their unwavering belief in others. At what age do we get that beaten out of us?

  Harlan’s phone buzzed in his pocket. It was a text from Joe.

  “Got it. I’ll bring the phone up.” Perfect.

  “I need to go for a minute. Tell the nurses the second you need me. Ok?”

  “Ok. Dr. Allred? Thank you for the song. It really helped.” She flashed her award-winning smile at him. It was exactly what he needed to give him hope that all would work out.