Dying To Live

by Sam Carter

  “You are a smart man. I knew I could come to you. I need you to help me find a man. This man.” Luke held up a picture he had drawn to exactness. It was a perfect likeness of Barry. Every detail perfect. “You know this man, don’t you?”

  Lying would not do any good. Luke obviously knew Harlan knew who he was. If he wanted this madman out of his office, he would have to give him what he wanted.

  “I do. Why do you need him?”

  “You know why, Harlan. This man, who wants everyone to call him “the voice”, needs to be stopped. You want that, don’t you?”

  “I do.” But Harlan wasn’t sure that Luke was the right person for the job. He also wasn’t sure that he wanted to cross Luke’s path either.

  “Then where is he? Where can I find him?”

  “Last I saw him he was going to his car. Probably for a meeting.” Harlan chose to tell a little lie to buy him more time. Time for what, he didn’t exactly know.

  “Then I’ll wait for him right here. You’ll keep me company, won’t you?” Not the best of ideas for Harlan. He needed to get Luke out of there now. He didn’t have time.

  “As much as I would love to have you here, how will you know that the voice is back? His office is on the eighth floor. Go and wait in the room with the glass doors right outside administration. You will be able to see as soon as he returns.”

  “A perfect idea,” Luke said as he stood up to leave. “Don’t go too far. I’m sure I’ll need your help again soon.”

  ***

  “Was that Luke Masterson walking out of your office?” Cole said as he and Clara walked in.

  “Yup.” The shock had finally caught up to Harlan. He had very few words left.

  “What was he doing here?”

  “Looking for Barry.”

  “Why would he be looking for Barry? Clue us in, Harlan.” Clara was standing right in front of Harlan, demanding an answer.

  “Barry’s the voice.”

  Clara was speechless, an event that deserved its own national holiday. Cole looked how Harlan felt: dumbfounded.

  “And Alex is in on it, too. There is no scenario where I see this working.”

  “There has to be, Harlan.” Clara found her voice. But there was very little conviction in it. “We’ve got all this antivenom. This isn’t over.”

  “It is. Even if we get past Barry, Alex, and whoever else in this place is a part of this, someone will die. I can’t live with that.”

  “But eleven kids will live.” Cole crossed over to Harlan and grabbed him by the shoulders. “You can’t forget that.”

  Harlan knew Cole was right, just like when he tried to convince him earlier. It didn’t make it easier to swallow. It didn’t mean he liked it. However, it did mean that he needed to end his pity party and grow a pair.

  “Ok. Now we just have to figure out how to get past Barry and get the kids the cure.”

  “Why don’t you call the cops? Tell the press? You could end this thing now and get to the kids without anyone in your way,” Clara said.

  “Don’t you think I’ve thought of that? Who would believe me, an alcoholic idiot, over a well-respected CEO of one of the top children’s hospitals in the country? And what about the evidence I have and how I got it? I stole blood from a patient and had it tested on a home chemistry kit. All my credibility is gone.”

  They sat in silence. No one had a clue about what they should do now. It was like they thought getting the antivenom would be the end. Once they got it, the path would be clear. Instead it had become harder to navigate.

  “It’s more complicated than I’ve let on. But . . .” Harlan had an idea. It was not ideal, but it could work.

  “But what, Harlan? Spit it out.”

  “It involves you, Cole,” Harlan said as he pulled all three phones out of his pockets. “I just need to make a few phone calls.”

  Chapter 60

  Harlan began the long journey to the eighth floor. Not long because of the distance, but because the weight of what was next pulled him down. Everything was in place for his plan except for two things, and that was where he was headed now. If these two important parts failed, all the rest of the work they had done wouldn’t matter. The road would still be blocked. No pressure at all.

  He looked through the glass doors of the room next to administration and saw that Luke was still in there. Pacing. Talking to himself. Looking like he was about to lose whatever was left of his mind. Harlan couldn’t decide if Luke would be the easy or hard part. Or if he could even distinguish between the two.

  “Luke?” Harlan whispered as he walked into the room. He was terrified a loud, sudden noise would set Luke off again. “Good. You’re still here.”

  “I’ve been waiting forever for this voice to show up. Where is he?” There was both power and fear in Luke’s voice. This scared Harlan more than anything.

  “He’s on his way back, but he won’t be coming here.”

  “What do you mean? You told me to wait here, and he would show up. Why did you lie to me?” With his one good hand, Luke picked Harlan up by his shirt and slammed him up against the wall. Harlan felt every last drop of air rush out of his body.

  He tried to talk, but nothing came out. This only made Luke more furious. Effortlessly, as if Harlan were just a feather, Luke flung Harlan across the room. Harlan slammed onto the floor and felt his body explode in pain. Harlan knew that this was it. This was how it all ended.

  Luke approached with a terrifying grin and stood over Harlan. He was about to crash his foot into Harlan’s throat when Harlan miraculously found his voice.

  “Wait. Please listen,” Harlan said weakly, but loud enough that Luke paused. “The voice is not coming to this office, but it will be better. I can deliver him to you.”

  Luke’s eyes widened. Harlan hoped that was a good sign, that he believed what Harlan said and would spare his life.

  He reached down and Harlan flinched figuring the final blow was coming. Instead Luke grabbed him by the hand and lifted him up.

  “Sorry about that, mate.” In the blink of an eye, Luke changed to the polite, articulate person he always had appeared to be, that he had always so flawlessly presented to the world. “Sometimes I allow my anger to win out before I listen. I’ll let you finish.”

  Harlan took a deep breath, which hurt in every part of his body. “Go to the fourth floor. There is a hallway there that because of construction is rarely used, except for as a shortcut by hospital staff. Wait there, and soon he and I will walk through. He’ll be all yours.”

  “You really are a smart man, Harlan. Have I told you that lately? This could be the start of a beautiful, long-lasting friendship,” Luke said as he walked out the door.

  Don’t count on it, Harlan thought. He had, however, begun to feel sad for Luke. Over the past few days he had started to believe that Luke was a monster driven by deep-seated hate for everything. But that wasn’t it. It was deeper and much worse than that.

  To Harlan it seemed Luke suffered from a serious and most likely undiagnosed mental illness. Left unchecked, it could not be managed and was dangerous for everyone who crossed his path. There was no doubt that people had used this to their advantage for years. Barry had exploited it. This made Harlan sick. Just another example of how poorly those with mental health issues were treated. Tossed out or manipulated. Sure, Luke was still responsible for his actions. There weren’t really any excuses for what he had done, but he needed help. And Harlan hoped, when all of this was done, he would be able to get it.

  But he couldn’t worry about that now. He had to focus on part two. This part should be easier, but he had to be believable. He could not be flustered.

  As Harlan started to open the door to administration, he was hit hard by what had just happened. He had almost been killed. Murdered. Gone forever. Was he walking into another death trap? Would his actions eventually lead to his death? He had never thought about those things before. He had worked around sickness and death for a long ti
me, but never took a second to question his own mortality. And now he was forced to.

  He closed the door, took a step back, then pulled out his phone and called his parents. He didn’t want the last they heard from him to be his canceling breakfast plans. And Harlan knew he was being a bit over-the-top, actually, way over-the-top, but facing death does that to a person. At least, that was his excuse.

  After several rings, his parents’ voicemail picked up. Shoot. He wanted to talk to them, but a message would have to do.

  “Hey Mom and Dad. It’s Harlan. Just calling to say hi, and I love you. I’m so sorry about breakfast yesterday and for screwing up so much, so often. You deserve a better son. I’ll work harder to be that from now on. I’ll call again this afternoon. I love you guys.”

  He hung up, but kept his phone on. Harlan remembered his promise to his son. He said he would talk to Emily. There wasn’t time now, but he should do something. It meant so much to Jack. Even a text would be good enough.

  “Just wanted to say hey. And if you ever need anything at all, call. I’m here.”

  Not sure if that was the right thing to say, he pressed send and made his way toward Barry’s office once again.

  He smiled and waved at Grace, Barry’s assistant, while she talked on the phone about who knows what. She motioned for him to go ahead in. He wasn’t sure he was ready, but it didn’t matter. He was here.

  “Barry! I need to talk to you. Something you should know.” Harlan burst in out of breath, needing Barry to think he had run frantically to his office. It appeared to work.

  “What? Sit down. Take a breath. What is going on?”

  “No time. The police are on their way back. I’m afraid it will be a scene, and I don’t want that with everything that’s happened here. It’s my fault.”

  “Harlan. Seriously. You’ve got to calm down. I can hardly understand you. What police? And why are they coming?”

  “The detective from yesterday, remember? She is coming to arrest my friend Cole.” Harlan thought he saw the hint of a smile flash across Barry’s face. Just enough for Harlan to know he had him. Then Barry was back to business.

  “What for? And why here? Why not somewhere else? We don’t need this now.”

  “It was the only way. He killed Josie. He did it because of me, because we hated each other. The cops thought I did it, but I knew it was him. I just had to prove it. And I got him to come here so he would have nowhere to run. I didn’t want you to be surprised.”

  “This must be so hard for you, Harlan.” Barry put his arm around him. Harlan wanted to snap it in two pieces and hear Barry scream in pain. “Do you want me to be there when they come? For support?”

  “Yes. That would really help.”

  It had worked. To perfection. And in a few short moments, the road ahead would be shorter and hopefully smooth.

  Chapter 61

  Rodriguez was surprised when Harlan called her. She thought that going to the hospital was the right idea, but this seemed too good to be true, which always made her nervous. But Harlan sounded confident as he explained the plan and gave her every detail she needed to succeed. She wasn’t sure if it were because he really was confident, or if he were putting on a face, doing what doctors do so well—putting the patient at ease even when they don’t completely know the answer.

  She had watched her doctor father do that for so long until he snapped from the pressure of pretending he was something he was not. Pretending he had the answers when he didn’t. And then having to deliver the bad news when everything they tried didn’t work.

  He was why Rodriguez became a cop. To get justice for those falsely imprisoned for crimes they could not, in their right mind, have committed. The man she knew would have never wandered into the corner drug store in just his underwear in the middle of the day. He would have never tried to walk out without paying for his fifty-cent candy bar. And when he was confronted by the store owner never would have stabbed him repeatedly until someone pulled him off the poor severely injured man. He shouldn’t be in some prison surrounded by all those criminals. He wasn’t one of them. He needed help. Serious mental help. And he wouldn’t get it locked up for fifteen to life.

  Maybe that’s why she was so invested in this case that made absolutely no sense. Harlan reminded her of her father. Caring and compassionate. Someone who worked hard to make a difference and covered up his feelings of inadequacy with sarcasm, especially in the most inappropriate moments. Maybe if she could solve this case and allow Harlan to save the patients, she could save Harlan from wandering off like her father had.

  Would what she was about to do work? She didn’t know. Would she lose her badge for it? She didn’t know that either, but she didn’t care. Sometimes you have to bend the rules a little bit to get the right outcome. Her mom always said, “Rules are meant to be followed, unless a broken one mends more than it breaks.”

  As she pulled into the hospital parking lot, she knew now was one of those times. If all went according to plan, and she had no idea if it would, she would be able to do a lot of mending. Not only for others, but maybe finally for herself.

  Chapter 62

  Harlan and Barry silently walked back to Harlan’s office. Normally they would be talking about baseball or work or anything really, but now Harlan didn’t know what to say to this man he had once looked up to and had considered a friend and mentor. A personal savior, even. He was convinced that anything that came out of his mouth would come out wrong, give him away, and end this whole thing.

  As they turned the final corner Barry turned to Harlan.

  “It takes a strong man to do what you did today. Turning your friend in. You have come a long way these past six months. I’m really proud of you.”

  Two days ago that would have been the perfect compliment. Now Harlan felt his blood boil to explosive levels. The ease at which Barry lied was effortless. It just rolled off his tongue.

  “Thanks, Barry.” You lying, murdering scumbag. “That really means a lot.” What I wouldn’t give to inject you with all the snake venom in the world.

  “Anytime. Now let’s go catch us a bad guy.”

  You’ll get your turn, Harlan thought as he gave Barry a surprisingly convincing smile of gratitude.

  “Harlan!” Rodriguez was waiting outside Harlan’s office door. “Is this where the suspect is?”

  “Yes. Right in my office.”

  “And he has no idea I’m here? This isn’t some cruel joke, is it? Trying to get me back for accusing you of all this earlier?”

  “He’s there. He thinks we’re meeting for lunch. I promise.”

  “He better be. Now back up.”

  Rodriguez pushed Harlan out of the way, pulled out her gun, and slowly opened the door.

  “Harlan? That you? I thought you wouldn’t be back for another half an hour.”

  Rodriguez barged in and pointed her gun at Cole, who looked sincerely terrified. Harlan couldn’t tell if he were that good of an actor, or if he had forgotten for a split second this wasn’t real.

  “Don’t move. Don’t even think about running. It won’t do you any good anyway. If you cooperate right now, this will all be easier for you.” How many horrible cop clichés could Rodriguez fit into one statement? She only forgot, “we’ve got the place surrounded.” Maybe she would get that in next.

  “Cooperate about what? I have no clue what you’re talking about.”

  “Don’t play dumb with me.” Another excellent use of cliché. “You murdered Josie Silver. We have evidence and motive. And we have your best friend to ensure you go away for a long time.”

  “No, I don’t believe you. Harlan would never do that to me.”

  “You left me with no choice, Cole. You did it. I can’t lie for you anymore. You’re on your own now.”

  “See, Cole? Not even your friend believes in you. Sad life you live. And now it’s over. It’s all over.”

  Cole put his head down and looked defeated. He slowly walked toward Rodrigu
ez ready to surrender, his hands out ready to be cuffed.

  As Rodriguez reached down to pull her handcuffs out, Cole saw that moment and took full advantage of it. He threw Rodriguez hard against the wall and ripped the gun from her hands.

  “You’re next,” Cole said, pointing at Harlan. “When you least expect it. You’re next.”

  Before Harlan or Barry could react, Cole bolted out the door and took off sprinting down the hall right into the middle of the hospital.

  Without hesitation Harlan took off after Cole. He could hear Rodriguez yelling at Barry to get off his butt and go for help. She was playing her part to perfection. Within moments Barry was right next to Harlan as they sprinted down the hallway.

  They stopped as they came to a section where a few halls crossed. Cole could have gone in any direction.

  “Where would he have gone?” Barry looked concerned. Harlan could see Barry’s mind moving with all the possibilities. Losing Cole would be devastating to Barry. For some reason, Cole was a huge part of this game they were playing.

  “I think I know. He knows a lot more about this place than he should. Follow me.”

  Harlan took off again with Barry right behind. They finally got to a little-used back staircase where Harlan once again stopped.

  “I’m sure he’s up this way. It’s loud back here though. Everything echoes. He’s got a gun, so walk quietly and slowly. Got it?”

  Barry nodded. The concern seemed to vanish from his face now. The confidence was back, but now with an edge of cocky. With an edge of the voice.

  As they were halfway up a flight of stairs, Barry slipped and one of his phones fell out of his pocket. The sound of it hitting the floor echoed throughout the stairwell. They froze, waiting for Cole to pop out at any second. But, just like Harlan knew, Cole would not be appearing anytime soon. He was nowhere near there at all.

  Harlan gave Barry an all clear thumbs up and pointed toward the door leading to the fourth floor. As they approached, Harlan put his hand up to stop Barry.