A Daughter's Courage

by Kitty Neale

  Alice and Dorothy fetched dishes from the kitchen until the table was laden with food. Adrian felt his stomach grumble at the sight of steaming turnips, carrots, peas and, best of all, the crispy roast potatoes that were placed around the crowning glory: a succulent-looking turkey. Each setting had a cracker ready for pulling and, though they only had ale glasses to drink from, they all enjoyed a glass of sherry, which Adrian had supplied.

  ‘This looks glorious, Alice,’ said Adrian and he raised his glass to toast her. ‘Season’s greetings, and may your home be blessed with happiness and prosperity.’

  Alice clinked glasses with him, took a sip of her drink and then said, ‘Would you do the honours, Adrian?’ as she handed him the carving knife.

  As he sliced through the turkey breast, his mouth salivated. It had been some time since he’d had good, home-cooked fare and he couldn’t wait to get stuck in.

  ‘Look, the wishbone,’ Dorothy squealed like an excited child.

  ‘Why don’t you and Adrian pull it?’ said Alice. ‘I only have the one wish and we all know what that is.’ She looked warmly at her husband who was absently staring at the wall beside his chair.

  Adrian offered the delicate bone to Dorothy with his chubby pinkie finger only just managing to grasp it. You’re not the only one with just one wish, he thought, locking eyes with Dorothy, and hoping, but not really believing, that his one wish would be granted.

  Alice saw the way that Adrian was looking at Dorothy, but doubted her daughter would ever feel the same way. It was a shame, because, though he was overweight, if Dottie married Adrian she’d want for nothing.

  ‘Come on now. Let’s get this dinner eaten before it turns cold,’ she said, but then felt her chest tighten. She rubbed it, regretting eating so many prunes before lunch. They had obviously given her indigestion and she winced as she caught her breath.

  ‘You look a bit peaky, Mum. Are you feeling OK?’

  Alice heard her daughter’s words but couldn’t seem to answer. She felt like she was struggling for breath and the pain in her chest intensified, as though a vice was gripping it tighter and tighter. She grabbed hold of the white cloth covering the table, but her left arm had gone numb. What was happening?

  Dorothy was standing up now, looking at her with a shocked expression, and, though she could see her daughter’s lips moving, she sounded so far away. The room was swimming and Alice felt herself begin to lean sideways from the chair. Then there was darkness.

  Adrian surveyed the scene in front of him. Alice had fallen from her chair to the floor, taking the tablecloth with her. She was lying motionless, covered in vegetables, while Dorothy knelt over her.

  ‘Oh my God, Adrian … what should we do? Call an ambulance? Would it be quicker to take her to the hospital in your car? Mum … Mum … can you hear me?’

  Adrian tried to think clearly but felt frozen to the spot.

  ‘Adrian … do something … ADRIAN, HELP ME!’ Dorothy screamed which spurred him to action.

  Bill was rocking back and forth in his chair and muttering the word ‘No’ over and over, so Adrian told her quickly, ‘Let me look at your mum. You see to your father.’

  Dorothy was beside herself and in obvious distress, though she went to her dad while Adrian got on one knee to place his fingers on Alice’s scrawny neck. He couldn’t feel anything so took her wrist in his hand, but try as he might he still couldn’t detect any sign of a pulse. This can’t be happening, he thought, lowering his ear to her face. There was no sound of breathing.

  Adrian sat back on his heels. There was nothing that could be done for Alice. She was gone. How on earth could he break it to Dorothy? She was already fragile from the loss of her baby, and now he had to tell her that her mother was dead.

  Chapter 16

  It was only a week into the New Year, but Robbie was already enjoying 1957. He had secured himself a tidy room in Portsmouth, with his own bathroom, in a decent enough house close to the seafront. Southsea was nearby, just a bit further along the coast, but best of all there was a pub on the corner of the road and Robbie had already made friends with a few of the locals.

  The fresh sea air was bracing but Robbie breathed it in deeply, and, as the coldness hit his lungs, he felt alive and vibrant. Life was good. He was on his way to meet a girl he’d bumped into the day before. She’d been coming out of a telephone box when they’d walked into each other and her long legs and blonde hair had caught Robbie’s eye. She reminded him a bit of Dorothy, but when the incident gave him the chance to speak to her the similarities stopped, because she spoke with a Welsh accent. He had flirted with her and she’d responded, giving him the opportunity to ask her out.

  He now felt excited at the prospect of buying her a few drinks and was sure his luck would be in tonight. After all, she’d been easily persuaded to meet him. It had been a while since he’d enjoyed the pleasures of a woman and his frustration was mounting.

  She was there as arranged, waiting outside the pub for him, and as Robbie approached he noticed she was attracting quite a bit of attention from passing men. He wasn’t surprised. In her tight skirt and low-cut jumper, he thought she looked very sexy, though she must have been freezing.

  ‘Hello, Gladys. You look cold. Haven’t you got a coat?’

  ‘Hi, Robbie. No, I did have a proper fur up until a few weeks ago but I had to sell it. Shame really because now it’s cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey.’

  Robbie smiled, surprised at Gladys’s language but pleased to find it sounded even funnier in her broad accent.

  ‘Best we get you inside and warmed up then,’ he answered as he admired her bulging cleavage.

  ‘Hey, cheeky, my eyes are up here, not down there in my bra. Am I going to have to fight against my breasts for your attention all night?’

  ‘Don’t you worry your pretty little face about attention from me,’ said Robbie with a frisky grin. ‘You can have as much of my attention as you like.’

  ‘Is that a promise? All your attention,’ Gladys purred.

  Robbie celebrated quietly inside. She was fast, flirty, and from the way she was playing with him he felt she was definitely a sure thing for tonight. They found a table and Gladys started knocking back gin and tonics at a rate that alarmed Robbie. He would have to get her back to his place sooner rather than later as he didn’t want to be spending much more of the cash he had left. At least not until he had done another job.

  ‘Excuse me a moment, will you? I’m going to powder my nose,’ said Gladys and made her way across the pub to the ladies’ toilet. It didn’t go unnoticed by Robbie that all eyes were on her as she wriggled her hips and clipped her heels on the wooden floor.

  ‘You’ve pulled a bit of a looker there, mate,’ a burly-looking man called from the bar.

  Robbie had shared a few pints with him over the last couple of evenings, learning that his name was Fred and that he was a merchant navy man. He was a rough diamond, but Robbie had enjoyed his company. ‘Yes, I certainly have.’

  Fred got off from his bar stool and came to Robbie’s table. He leaned in and whispered, ‘I’ve had a bit of a windfall and come into a few quid. If she’s got any sisters or friends, well, you know what I mean?’

  Robbie looked up at Fred. He was a large man with hands as big as shovels, and a bulbous nose that matched his stature. Not only that, his ears were almost as big as his bald head so, all in all, he wasn’t exactly an oil painting. Robbie doubted that Fred had much success when it came to women.

  Teasing, Robbie said, ‘So you fancy my new girlfriend, do you?’

  ‘No, no, Robbie. It ain’t like that. Well, it is actually, she’s a blinder, but she’s your bird and I wouldn’t step on your toes. But like I said, if she’s got any friends I’ve got a pocket full of cash and you know me, I’d be generous.’

  Gladys came back to the table and gave Fred a friendly smile as she sat down. ‘This is Fred, a friend of mine,’ Robbie said.

  ‘Hello,’
Gladys said.

  Fred looked awkward and shuffled from foot to foot, but managed to stutter, ‘Pl-pleased to meet you.’

  Robbie saw the effect Gladys had on Fred, and as the man had admitted to having a pocket full of cash, an idea suddenly sprang to mind – one that this time didn’t involve robbery.

  ‘Fred, why don’t you get a round in and join us?’ he asked.

  ‘Err, yeah, all right. What are you ’aving?’

  ‘A whisky for me and a gin and tonic for Gladys,’ Robbie said, and, as he watched Fred walk to the bar, his idea expanded into a plan that could be a lucrative long-term venture.

  As the evening went on, Robbie turned on the charm and told jokes that made both Gladys and Fred laugh. He noted that Gladys hung on to his every word and had to laugh when she described him as posh. When it was coming up to nine-thirty he saw that Gladys was tipsy and decided it was time to recoup some of the money he’d spent on her. ‘Fred, why don’t you pop along to the off licence to buy a bottle of whisky, and then we can head over to my place.’

  Fred looked confused. ‘Your place? What for?’

  ‘I thought we’d have a bit of a party. What about you, Gladys? Do you fancy coming back to mine?’

  She looked a bit disappointed and pouted. ‘I don’t know, Robbie. I thought it was going to be just me and you tonight.’

  ‘Don’t worry about that, there’ll be other nights and a little party would be nice.’

  ‘Oh, all right.’

  ‘Good girl,’ said Robbie and kissed her quickly on the cheek. ‘Fred, off you go then, mate. Get the whisky and I’ll see you back at mine. You know where it is, number twenty-three, just up this road.’

  The cold air spurred Gladys on and Robbie was pleased that she walked quickly. He wanted a few minutes with her before Fred got back. He opened the front door and invited Gladys in before him, slapping her bottom as she passed on the doorstep. Gladys giggled and sashayed up the stairs to Robbie’s second-floor room with Robbie following and admiring her backside.

  Once inside, Robbie closed the door and pushed Gladys up against it. He furiously kissed her and ran his hands up and down her voluptuous body.

  ‘Hey, easy, tiger,’ Gladys breathed. ‘What’s the rush?’

  ‘Fred will be here soon … I want a bit of you before he disturbs us.’

  ‘Robbie, I do really like you but we’ve only just met. I don’t want you to think I’m that sort of girl.’

  ‘Of course you aren’t,’ he answered as he lifted her jumper over her breasts and reached around her back to unfasten her bra. Gladys’s breasts swung loose and Robbie cupped handfuls of them, brushing his lips and tongue against her nipples. ‘It isn’t important that we haven’t known each other for long. You’re my girlfriend and it just matters that we would do anything for one another.’

  ‘Oh, Robbie,’ Gladys replied, giving into Robbie’s advances and caresses, ‘I’ve never met anyone like you before and if I’m your girlfriend now, of course I’d do anything for you.’

  Robbie hid a smile of triumph. Perfect! That was just what he wanted to hear.

  A knock on the bedroom door brought the canoodling couple to a stop and Gladys adjusted her clothing as Robbie let Fred in.

  ‘This is nice,’ said Robbie, pouring them all liberal measures of whisky in white china teacups. ‘Cheers!’

  Fred and Gladys downed theirs, but then an awkward silence fell between them. ‘Come on, lighten up, you two. This is supposed to be a party,’ Robbie said.

  ‘Well, a party usually has music,’ said Gladys.

  ‘You’re Welsh, aren’t you? I thought all you girls from the valleys could sing. Come on, give us a song then.’

  ‘Don’t be silly,’ she replied. ‘Haven’t you got a record player or a radio?’

  ‘I’ve only just moved in but as luck would have it, there’s an old radio in the cupboard. I don’t know if it works but, Fred, pour us all another and I’ll see if I can get us some music. Anything to keep my girl happy,’ Robbie said and winked at Gladys.

  The radio didn’t work but Robbie wasn’t going to allow that to put a damper on the night. The whisky had gone to his head and was making him feel horny, but he had something else on his mind. Something that was little effort for him and could earn him a bob or two.

  Half an hour later, Gladys checked her reflection in the bathroom mirror. She was pleased with what she saw and sauntered back into the room where Fred was sitting, legs splayed on the floor. Robbie was sitting on the bed, casually leaning up against the headboard.

  ‘Come and sit next to me,’ Robbie said to her, patting the bed next to him.

  The gin mixed with the whisky was making Gladys feel quite heady and she wobbled a little on her heels as she walked across the room.

  ‘Kick your shoes off,’ Robbie urged. ‘Relax and make yourself at home.’

  Gladys was happy to do just that. Robbie’s place was only a room but he had his own bathroom. It was so much nicer than where she lived, a place she shared with her three younger sisters and several other families. She wrinkled her nose at the thought of the stench that was always present in the bathroom they all used. She hated living there and detested the fact that she was forced to make her sisters stay there too, but after their mother died there’d been no choice. Unable to support them, she knew she had to find their father, who was a sailor, and with her sisters in tow they’d travelled down to Portsmouth.

  It had been awful to move away from the lush, green small town where they had been born and brought up. Their mother worked as a cook in the big house that came with a tied cottage, but when she died they’d been told they had to move out. It didn’t seem right, but she was sure her father would be able to sort it out. She just didn’t know when he was due back from sea.

  Gladys took off her shoes and snuggled into Robbie. It was comforting to have a boyfriend and she hoped he would help look after her sisters too. She had sold just about everything they owned, including the fur coat her father had bought her mother. She remembered the look on her mother’s face when she’d been presented with the coat. ‘What a ridiculous waste of money,’ she had exclaimed, and sure enough she’d never worn it. Her father had tickled her nose and told the woman to hush up, saying the coat had come to him by good fortune and not a penny had been wasted.

  A lovable rogue, that’s what her mother always said about her dad. Gladys missed him terribly and hoped she would find him soon, but in the meantime she had Robbie to take care of her now.

  Gladys was dozing but was woken from her nap as she felt Robbie’s hand move up her leg, as high as her suspenders. It felt nice, and though she had protested her innocence to Robbie, in truth she had lost her virginity to a farmhand about a year ago. They had enjoyed a few tumbles in the hay, and now, as Robbie gently caressed her, she forgot Fred was in the room. She nuzzled Robbie’s neck and he turned his head to kiss her on the lips, parting her mouth with his tongue.

  Fred cleared his throat.

  ‘Do you like what you see, Fred?’ Robbie asked.

  ‘Yes, mate, don’t mind me,’ Fred replied and licked his lips eagerly.

  ‘Do you want to come over and have a feel?’

  ‘Robbie!’ Gladys exclaimed, unable to believe he’d suggest such a thing.

  ‘It’s all right, Gladys. Fred’s a good friend of mine and I like to see my friends having a good time. Come on, I thought you said you’d do anything for me?’

  ‘Yes, but, Robbie, not that!’ Gladys replied, annoyed that he would expect that of her.

  ‘Oh, I see, so you talk the talk but don’t carry it through. I can’t stand girls who do that, so if you want to be my girlfriend you’ll have to change your ways. If not, well, we’ll call it a day.’

  Gladys’s mind was fuddled with alcohol but one thing was for sure: she didn’t want to lose Robbie. If it meant letting Fred join in, then so be it. She reluctantly nodded. ‘All right then. I’ll do it,’ she said and laid herself down on
the bed, dreading what was coming next.

  Robbie beckoned Fred over with his head. ‘That’ll be a pound,’ he said and held his hand out for payment.

  Gladys saw the money exchange hands. I’ll be having half of that, she thought, and though suddenly aware that she was about to sell her body for sex, she resigned herself to the fact that as she was desperate not to lose Robbie, she’d have done it for free. The money was an added bonus and she needed it to feed her little sisters.

  The thought had never before occurred to her to prostitute herself and she wouldn’t have had the nerve to do it alone, but with Robbie there to look after her, Gladys could close her eyes and just wait for the big oaf to get it over and done with.

  Chapter 17

  The church was full of mourners who had come to pay their last respects to Alice. Dorothy was surprised to find there was standing room only, a fine tribute to her mother, especially as she hadn’t left the house in years.

  Dorothy sat at the front and found a small measure of comfort in having Nelly to one side of her and Adrian on the other. Her eyes were fixed on the coffin – she couldn’t believe her dear mother was lying in there. It just didn’t seem possible.

  The vicar welcomed everyone and led the first hymn but it was all becoming a daze to Dorothy. She looked at the words in her hymnbook, but her brain wouldn’t register them. She couldn’t shake the thought of how much she was going to miss her mum.

  Tears began to well in her eyes and Dorothy felt the urge to run from the church. She suddenly realised that she couldn’t go through with this; it was just unbearable. There was still the interment to face but she couldn’t deal with the anguish of watching them put her mother into the ground, burying her small, frail body. It was unthinkable. She wanted to escape the all-consuming pain.