Die, My Love

by Penelope Fletcher

  “This is not your fault. It’s his.”

  “Is it? Daniel is surviving the only way he knows how, by filling up he hole she left behind.” Ben kisses my forehead. “I love you, but it was a mistake to do so.”

  This hurts, but I bat his words away. “There is nothing wrong with what we feel for each other. So, a few couples before us royally cocked things up, no matter. It doesn’t mean we’ll do the same. Look at Simone and Adam, they’re making it work.”

  “Barely.”

  “Whatever. Darling, you are depressing me and worrying over nothing. We’ll sort your Sire out and it will be fine. Believe it, and we’ll be one step closer to achieving it.”

  He twists away from me to look out over the water. “I am disquieted. I fear the worst.”

  With a sigh, and a roll of my eyes, I place my hands on his strong back and lean my cheek in between them. I have no more words for him. I hope the love in my heart will speak for me instead.

  ‘What now?’

  “Bethany,” I reply.

  Chapter 13

  Bye, Bye Bethany

  Outside Bethany’s house, I breathe in deeply. I open my eyes and smile, feeling my lips pull back over my fangs. “They’re here,” I breathe.

  I bend my legs and Ben snags my arm to spin me around roughly. “Someone is awake, I hear it.”

  “I know.”

  “Should the worst occur, you will cause your friend pain if you do this.”

  His hand digs into my arm. “The problem is not with me killing him,” I say slowly. “Somehow you think hurting him will hurt me.”

  “Your friend will grieve for him. She will have lost two people she loves, and this will cause you pain.”

  “Bethany will never lose me,” I bite back furiously.

  ‘You are in love with her.’ Ben’s voice is pained; he couldn’t even speak the words aloud.

  I step into him and tickle his sides. ‘I love her, deeply, but I am in love with you.’

  His dark eyes twinkle down at me. ‘You sound so certain.’

  “That is because I am,” I murmur into his mouth before I slant my lips over his and kiss him with all the passion and love I feel. He wraps his arms around me tightly, pulling me close. My stomach cramps painfully, making a harsh crunching sound. I cry out and Ben splays a hand to my stomach and rubs soothingly.

  ‘You must feed again before we make our way back to Castle. There are precious few hours before the sun rises. Come now. Let us leave this for another night.’

  “I want to see her. Please.” Ben swoops me into his arms and smiles down at me. His previous anguish has been pushed away and he is genuinely happy.

  “As you wish.”

  “I’m perfectly able to walk.” I quirk my eyebrow and loop my arms around his neck to snuggle closer.

  “The feel of you in my arms is pleasurable. I never was one to deny myself pleasure.” He glances up. “We could take the stairs?”

  “That would be no fun, and I want to surprise her with how cool I am.”

  Chuckling, he bends his knees and jumps, landing silently on the small balcony outside Bethany’s window. I rap on it loudly, my best I Am A Scary Creature Of The Night face firmly in place. Nothing. I tap the window again when there is no answer.

  A hushed murmur reaches me from inside the flat, a male voice demanding Bethany get up and check the window. Wow, Derek really is an asshole. The heavy curtain rustles and a pair of eyes peeks at us then disappear. What on earth? Another hushed and panicked whisper for Bethany to get up. Something is not right. Beth is an insomniac, and though dawn is drawing closer, she would probably have slept a few hours and be up by now, tearing her hair out and moaning about bags under her eyes.

  I smash my fist through the window and undo the latch, sliding the frame up. I clamber down from Ben’s arms and climb inside.

  ‘We need to work on your patience,’ Ben says dryly. ‘You frightened him.’

  Landing inside the flat, I ignore the crunch of glass beneath my feet and scan the room. Bethany lies on the bed. Derek shakes her roughly mumbling for her to wake up. The room is dishevelled, nasty really. Not like Bethany at all. Her cleanliness borders on obsessive compulsive.

  “Bethany knows what I’m about. Don’t you,” I joke, to get her attention. Derek clutches his head and cries out. Bethany does not respond. What’s wrong? Is she pissed at me because of how long I have been gone? “Beth, sweets, I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to get back to you but there’s a good reason. Look at me, please; you’re going to freak out when you can see what I can do now. Beth? Come on, look at me.”

  Ben stares at Bethany on the bed, concentrating. ‘Love, you forget what my voice used to do to you,’ Ben reminds me.

  Oh gosh. I clamp my lips together guiltily. I totally forgot about that part.

  My friend is still turned onto her side, so still. The scent of her fear is rank in the small room, and what is most disturbing of all … I think I smell … death. I shudder. Bethany, afraid of me? I’ve known this girl my whole life, been through more than I can remember. No matter what I’ve become, or how much my voice hurts her ears, she will never be afraid of me.

  Ben’s hand lands on my upper arm. He sniffs and tightens his hold on me. ‘Love, you must remain calm.’

  “Why do I need to be calm? What’s going on here?”

  “What’s wrong with your voice, you freak? Get the fuck out of my house!” Derek, still shrieking nonsense jumps off the bed and lunges for the light switch. I react, and in a blur of movement, I have him by the throat and half way up the wall, legs dangling.

  “Tisk, tisk,” I chide and pat his cheek with my free hand. “The bright lights still hurt my eyes. You understand, don’t you?”

  He rubs the side of head into the wall trying to both tear my hand from his throat and rub his other ear “Lee? Is that you?” he squeaks and angles his head down to get a better look at me. “We thought you were dead.”

  Dark hair matted to his head, Derek’s skin has an almost grey tinge. His lips are dry and cracked, and his pupils are like saucers: corneas jaundiced and bloodshot. His eyelid keeps twitching. Sweat beads his brow and trickles down his temples. Oh. Now I’m closer I hear his heart chugging. Each pump from the organ pushes heat through the air to flutter across my colder skin. I inhale deeply. He’s a smoker, is that why Beth started up again, his bad influence? Ugh, his blood is saturated with nicotine and caffeine. He’s also taken something else, recently, a stronger drug. I smell it coming off him, so pungent I taste it. I gag. My eyes glance down his body continuing my harsh assessment and finally rest on his hands. There are bruises on his knuckles, some old and some fresh. He’s been hitting something, beating someone.

  The world is turning black at the edges. My entire body quakes as my head turns slightly to where Bethany lies.

  “Love… .” Ben takes a hesitant step toward me, his eyes now pained and still resting on Bethany. “Don’t–”

  I drop Derek and rush over to Beth, dragging her shoulder back, and pinning her to the bed. She does not fight me – not like her at all. One eyeball is rolled into the back of her head and one is puffed closed, swollen and purple. She has no wig on and her gamine cut is matted, sticking up at haphazard angles in clumps. Lips blue, her skin is chalk white. I hear no heartbeat. Her chest is silent, her blood still. Lifeless flesh. Dead. I choke out a sob. I pick up her arm gently, it’s stone cold, and the needle sticking from the crook of her arm wobbles. I wrench it from her skin, crush it in hand, and drop it to the floor beside us.

  “Bethany is not a junkie,” I manage. “She would have told me.”

  Ben says nothing. Derek is crying, heaving sobs as he claws at the wall.

  I press my fingers to the side of her bruised face. I follow the touch with my lips, ignoring the horrible smell on her ashen skin. Bethany usually smells like baby lotion.

  Lee, you’ve been gone a month, and as wonderful as Beth is, she’s always had an addictive pers
onality.

  I feel sick. My skin crawls at the thought of her sticking needles into herself to get high.

  Squeezing my eyes shut, I push my thoughts to the back of my head. Further inspection of her skin shows further track marks. She hadn’t even tried to hide it. Yeah, she’d done a few joints in Uni, but she’d never done anything remotely close to this. What happened to my friend? I rest her head to the side, stroke her swollen eye, and close the other lid.

  Rage rumbles beneath the surface, a red haze that blackens at the corners. I have to get my anger under control or I will end up killing him far too quickly. I was going to take this slow, nice and slow, and painful.

  I gracefully roll off the bed onto my feet. “Derek, you sonofa– Ben!”

  Ben is latched onto Derek’s neck, his entire body rigid. He throws his head back with a pained gasp. “Ugh. He tastes foul.” Dropping Derek to the floor he swipes a hand over his mouth, disgust in the move. “I sucked out most of the poison. You’re too young to ingest hard drugs.” He reaches his hand toward me, concern etched into his features. “It would make you ill.” He winces and places a hand to his temple.

  In a blink, I’m at his side, worried, frightened. Ben has never shown any physical weakness before now. My heart hammers hard. Is he dying? Is he sick? Will he leave me like Beth has, Grief washes over me, my heart sinks, the room spins but I push through it. ‘Are you well?’ I ask Ben. ‘What should I do?’

  “Calm yourself.” Ben strokes my face. “Breathe slowly. Human drugs do not agree with our system. I’ll be fine tomorrow night after I feed again. I’ll be weaker until then.”

  I allow myself to breathe out, let myself be calm like he asks of me.

  Pitiful whimpering draws my attention away from him, and I tilt my head down expecting to see Derek, but instead see the dirty soles of his feet. I grab his foot and drag him back. Picking him up by the hair, I body slam him onto the bed, the weight means nothing to me now. I straddle him in the next moment, my fangs bared.

  He screams.

  “This will not make you feel better.” Ben stands beside me. Derek rears up and he places a finger in the middle of Derek’s forehead to push him down flat. “But I understand.”

  My brow slants, my teeth lengthen, and all sympathy and vestiges of humanity flee in the face of the monster that consumes me. Snarling, I yank his head back and bury my teeth into his throat. Blood spurts. His scream becomes a wet gurgle; his body’s bucking, a feeble struggle. I am not gentle. I bite down hard, sucking the life from him, and having a good fucking time whilst doing it.

  Flashes strobe in front of my eyes, visions of Bethany crying, his hands fisted around her neck as he squeezes the air from her and takes her brutally. I feel it when his balled up fist connects with the side of her head. I hear and feel the crunch as her skull fractures. I feel his arousal at her weakness, the rush of power he experiences from this sick display of dominance. He likes hurting her, and likes making women feel small and insignificant. The next flash makes my heart sink to the soles of my feet. It’s of me and Bethany, her head between my legs, and I’m arched off the bed. His jealousy and lust choke me as he pleasures himself from the bushes outside.

  How did I not see how cruel he was before now? How did I miss this? Why didn’t she tell me?

  I flex my jaw. His puny fists try to fight me off, thumping my sides. There is a snap and he shrieks. Swallowing, I glance off to the side and see Ben has broken his arm. Well, he asked for it. Like my man was going to stand there and watch him hit me.

  Derek’s is dying. He’s lost too much blood and the terror is too much for his heart.

  Make your choice, Lee. Does he live or does he die?

  I draw my teeth out of him and lean back. My body feels alive, warm. I trawl my hands through my hair and roll my shoulders. Bethany’s loss weighs heavily on my heart, but Derek’s pain lightens the load. I am not ashamed to admit it. He sobs beneath me, and I slap him across the face, making his head jack-knife to the side. He gets the message and shuts up.

  Ben is carefully checking Bethany over. His face is furious and twists in disgust as Derek whimpers beneath me. When he looks back at Bethany his expression softens. “She suffered, but is at peace now.” I look at my friend lying beside me, and my eyes mist with red again. This time it’s not from anger. I blink as tears of blood leak down my face. Ben unceremoniously pushes Derek’s lax body off the bed. He lands with a thump in a broken heap. Ben gathers me into his arms, tucking my head under his chin. “Hush now, you didn’t know, couldn’t have known.”

  “I should have noticed,” I mumble, hiccup. I wipe my mouth and grimace when a chunk of Derek’s flesh slides off my fang. “She was my best friend. I should have seen what he was doing to her. God, Ben, why didn’t she tell me?”

  He’s quiet for a while, his hands rubbing my back. “Would you have told her? Honestly?”

  My instinct is to say yes, I would have told her, but I pause, because the truth is staring me in the face. I had not told her about Ben when I first met him, and I was not sure I would have. She only found out because he had a wish to meet someone from my family. Shit. I understand why she had not said anything. As close as we were, you just didn’t tell some things to certain people. Not only was Bethany my friend, she had been a lover. In either capacity I would have… well, I would have freaked had I found out how terribly Derek was treating her.

  Shifting from Ben’s arms, I pick up the edges of the blanket Bethany lies on top of and wrap her up tightly. I kiss her forehead and pray she’s found peace.

  Leaning over the edge of the bed, I take Derek’s head in my hands and twist until I hear the fatal crack. The lines of his body go limp. Dropping him, I rub my hands on my thighs then climb off the bed and head toward the door. “There was no longer a place for him in this world.”

  “That is for you to decide?”

  I stop and turn to face him slowly. “Now you get moral?”

  “Did you kill him for Beth or to make yourself feel better?”

  I hold up my hand to signal that he should stop talking. “I’ll put a call in to the police later.” Never will I come back here. Never.

  Ben follows silently behind me.

  Outside, I’m charging down the pavement trying to work of some of my aggression. I shake my hands, flicking away the ugly feeling that had coiled inside me and sprung forth, demanding I end Derek.

  “Lee,” Ben says urgently, voice cracking with emotion. “Please wait. I’m sorry. Let’s talk, remember her.”

  My anger dissipates. Like a storm cloud that is spent, it breaks apart, and the whirlwind of pain is no more. I spin around, open my mouth, and close it. I shake my head and chuckle. “I’ll not mourn her. She was vibrant, a force of nature. Bethany’s life will be celebrated, and I will never forget her. She was too wonderful to deserve anything less.” I beam at him, honestly feeling better, and laugh. “Ben, you said my name.” It was the first time, and it sounded marvellous from his lips.

  Screeching around the corner, a sports car careens to a halt in front of us, bouncing up onto the curb. The engine purrs. My god, it might just be sexier than Ben’s motorbike.

  The driver’s tinted window rolls down and Iain, face etched in leans out. “Daniel killed a Lycan. The body lies on Castle steps.”

  There is a strained silence as the reality of that statement sinks in.

  Lycans. War. Death.

  “The fool,” Ben hisses. “He will bring the entire pack down on my head.”

  “I think that is the plan,” Afzal’s deep voice says from the passenger seat. I see his tense lower body, his huge hands fisted on his thighs.

  “How did you find us?” I ask Iain.

  He smirks at me, eyes flicking to my mouth, to my eyes, and taking in the blood on my chin and chest. “All of us can find ye. Welcome to the family, Lee. Was dinner good?”

  “Yeah, yeah.” I’m already sliding into the back seat of the car. “Let’s go.”

&n
bsp; Chapter 14

  To Battle The Undying

  The drive passes in silence. I am too wrapped in my own fight to not let melancholy taint Bethany’s passing, and Ben is too furious at the death of the Lycan speak.

  “We’re being hunted,” Afzal says matter of fact and cracks his knuckles.

  I look out the window, my keen eyesight laser sharp in the dark. True enough, shadows race beside us, weaving in and out of the tress.

  Wolves.

  “Lycans,” Ben murmurs. “ It took two hundred years to broker peace after the last war Daniel declared.” He sighs heavily and clasps my fingers. “I count three to the north east.”

  “Two my side,” Afzal adds. “Easy.”

  Easy? To kill them? No. What would that achieve?

  ‘It is necessary,’ Ben thinks to me. ‘They will not listen to reason. One of us has killed one of them. That is all they care about. We must keep you safe.’

  ‘We can try,’ I plead. ‘They may still listen if we explain.’

  ‘It is too dangerous.’

  “Stop the car,” I demand out loud. ‘Now,’ I add in my mind and all three flinch, hunching their shoulders.

  Surprisingly, Iain hits the breaks. We jolt forward and slam back into the leather seats. I use the shock of the whiplash to jump out of the car a second before Ben makes a grab for me. “Lee!” he roars.

  Wolves double the size of Alsatians lunge from the woods onto the road; their powerful bodies thickly muscled and long-legged. Crouching, gathering themselves, they spring forward to streak towards me, teeth bared, snarling. The pack is shaggy and coloured in hues of dark brown and black. Their teeth glow in the darkness. Narrowed oval eyes ranging from deep green to vivid amber blaze hatred. Calmly, I cast my gaze over them again and do not see the silky chestnut coat, and mysterious blue gaze I was hoping for.

  “Harmony!” I screech. “If any of you can hear me or understand me, I demand to speak to Harmony.”

  The wolves scramble to a stop, claws clattering as they backpedal at the familiar name. My fists clench at my sides, nails scraping my palm, and my stomach summersaults. Thank goodness for that. Their sleek heads swing from side to side, uncertain, and after less than a beat, one rumbles sullenly lifting his head to the sky. He howls piercingly, long, and deep. It echoes through the trees, steals away through the night carrying power that is unknown to my kind. I focus on this one. His fur is more hirsute than the others, and a smoky grey is clumped around the jowls. He looks familiar…. The rest follow him, growling, hot breath rushing from elongated maws in clouds of dense vapour. The agitated pacing makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end.