“You okay?”
“Yes.” She leaned in and kissed her.
The ride home was quiet as they each contemplated the next step in their relationship. For each of them there was a nervous outlook; for Lucy it had literally just been so long that she almost felt like a teenage virgin again. For the first few years after losing Nicky, she had concentrated only on getting better. Her recovery was slow and painful in every way, and the thought of ever having another relationship hadn’t even entered her mind. Eventually, she considered it. She went on a few dates with women her friends set her up with, but she didn’t feel any spark with them. All she could think about was how she was disrespecting Nicky. And then she met Megan. They were both using the same physiotherapist. Meg had fallen and damaged her knee ligaments. She was also blind and couldn’t see the scars that covered Lucy. She was sweet, and Lucy had been able to enjoy spending time with her. It was fine until Lucy realised that she could see, just not with her eyes. Right then, Lucy knew she wasn’t ready, and she hadn’t been until now.
For Nicole, having been with someone as vile as Paul for the best part of the last decade meant that sex had connotations attached to it that she never wanted to think of again. To contemplate intimacy with anyone else had been unthinkable until these last few weeks. She knew though that being with Lucy was not going to be anything like being with him; it would be gentle and intimate, special. She knew Lucy would take care of her and she wanted it. Even though she had declared the need to go slowly, it had been a real difficulty to keep her libido from racing ahead. She could only hope that tonight would be the night.
~E&F~
“Do you want a drink?” Lucy asked as they entered the cabin. She moved around the room flicking lamps on, trying to calm herself. It wasn’t that it was decided already that things would progress, and it might have been years since she had been in this situation, but she wasn’t blind. She recognised all the signs of arousal in herself and in Nicole, and she was ready for this to go further. Scared, but ready.
Nicole watched her for a moment, noticing she was just as nervous, and decided to just take the bull by the horns. She moved closer to her, her eyes never leaving Lucy’s. As she reached her, she placed her palms flat against her chest, sliding them up over her shoulders and around her neck, fingers tangling in her hair.
“No, I have everything I want right here,” she whispered, leaning in for a kiss. A kiss that was instantly reciprocated.
“Everything?” Lucy asked, smiling and placing her hands around her waist, tugging her towards her.
“Mmm hmm,” Nicole replied, smiling into the next kiss. Her fingers slid further into Lucy’s hair, keeping her lips in place. “I think we should take this to the bedroom,” she all but whispered, taking Lucy’s hand and leading her to the room they had been sharing these past nights.
Nicole reached the bed and then turned to face Lucy, reaching her hand up behind her and pulling the zipper on her dress down. The dress loosened around her shoulders and she shimmied out of it, letting it fall slowly to the floor, leaving her standing clad in just her underwear, her almost black hair matching perfectly.
“You’re so beautiful,” Lucy whispered as she closed the distance between them and captured her lips once more. “So very beautiful.”
Her touch was tender; everything about Lucy was loving and giving, and although apprehensive about being this vulnerable in front of her, Nicole knew she would be in good hands, and she wanted those hands to touch her, to caress her and to pleasure her in every way that was possible. She wanted to finally know what it felt like to be loved by someone so fully like she knew Lucy would love her.
“You can be loved by me, Lucy,” she said solemnly. “And I know I can be loved by you.”
Lucy brought her hand up to Nicole’s cheek and stroked her skin. Once upon a time, that action by someone would have made Nicole flinch, but not now, not here, and not her.
She covered Lucy’s hand with her own and kissed the palm. “Love me tonight?”
Feelings began to overwhelm Lucy. Her heart ached, but in a good way; a way that felt like it was mending. Her fingers tingled, and the need to touch Nicole made her tremble. Her fingers slid effortlessly through raven locks, inching ever closer until they were kissing. Their lips, like always, were so soft and pliable as they moved with ease against one another, parting slowly to deepen and bring forth a murmur of need and want.
“I will love you every night,” Lucy whispered reverently. There would be no other option for her. She loved this woman, she knew that much now.
The buttons that held Lucy’s shirt together were small and fiddly, but Nicole’s deft fingertips worked quickly to release them from the security of their cotton cradle. She slid her palms beneath the soft material, her left hand skimming over smooth skin that was soft and yielding to her touch. Her right hand felt a polar opposite: flesh that was rough and hardened. Nicole used the back of her hands to slowly reveal Lucy as she pushed the scarlet material off of her shoulders. It caught on her biceps, but Nicole wasted no time in pushing the material down until it fell by its own volition to be forgotten on the floor. Lucy’s eyes followed every movement, captivated by the way Nicole could spark such a desire within her. Every touch sent a shockwave of excitement and longing through her every cell.
She kissed Lucy along the scar that marred her beautiful face, down her neck and along her collarbone. Her lips, like her fingers, felt the change of smooth to rough skin. It didn’t faze her. She was pulled upward, back to waiting lips that felt like home.
Breaking the kiss, Lucy took a moment to study Nicole. The swell of her breasts encased in lace, the soft roundness to her tummy all added to the beauty of her. She couldn’t envisage ever thinking of her as anything less than beautiful.
Lucy climbed up onto the bed and then reached out her hand for Nicole to take, leading her to the centre of the mattress. On their knees, pressed thigh to thigh, breast to breast, they kissed once more as confidence began to surge through them both. Urgency bubbled beneath the surface, held back with a need to explore and enjoy this moment that they would never get back.
It wasn’t difficult for Lucy to let her fingers explore, a skill long ago learnt; her instincts wouldn’t fail her now. They stroked slowly down Nicole’s tummy before dipping inside the band of her underwear, and when she heard the low, sensual moan that came from Nicole at her touch, she decided that it was unequalled by anything she had heard in a long time.
Their kiss deepened. Lucy felt the arc of electricity that shot between them as she slid gently inside of her, feeling Nicole’s fingertips grip her shoulder with one hand as the other began its own search of skin to touch and stroke: a breast, her waist. Nicole couldn’t think; all she could do was feel, feel the way in which Lucy was adoring her, touching her with tenderness. They were making love, that was the difference. That was what had always been missing: someone to make love to her. Someone who wanted her to enjoy the experience, to participate with her as they found pleasure together.
They collapsed side by side on the bed, smiles adorning both faces as they continued to caress and kiss, teaching one another in ways that until now either had barely considered possible.
“Are you okay?” asked Lucy, wanting to be sure that Nicole was comfortable with everything they were doing. Her eyes had misted over, and it had unsettled Lucy a little.
“God yes,” Nicole gasped as she felt Lucy’s fingers find a particularly sensitive spot along her torso. Her tears began to overflow as she shook her head. “Happy tears.” They both laughed. “Nobody has ever…”
Lucy’s smile widened as she understood what Nicole was trying to explain. She pulled her in tighter and hugged her closer, enjoying the feeling of this intimacy, the familiarity of it. “I will always treat you with care and respect,” Lucy said gently into her hair as she sobbed quietly. “Always.”
Nicole looked up and found Lucy’s vibrant eyes. In them she saw everything she hoped
Lucy was seeing in her own. Want, need, lust, love. She moved to kiss Lucy again, gently pushing her onto her back so she could show her how she felt. If it was indeed possible to show someone that they adored them and wanted them in every way possible, if there was a way to show Lucy just how much she was attracted to her and aroused by her, then she would find it.
Lucy’s legs parted and allowed Nicole to settle her own trim thigh neatly between them. She was no expert, but she wasn’t naïve; she knew what women could do together, and her imagination was in overdrive right now.
She kissed a path downwards, following the pattern of scars and mapping the areas that caused a whimper or a gasp from Lucy. She wanted to find every way she could to give Lucy what she had given her. Using her knee to nudge apart Lucy’s thighs further, she settled herself between them and used her mouth to bring pleasure so irrefutably immeasurable that Lucy could do little more than give herself over to her. Lucy felt lighter, as though she were floating and yet she was anchored, safely sheltered in the harbour of Nicole’s love, an enclave that only she would ever bear witness to.
In the hours that followed, between bouts of sleep, they made love again, effortlessly slipping into each other’s arms, healing together. When the sun began to rise and peak in through the window, Lucy found herself captivated by the woman sharing more than just her bed. Raven locks shone in the sunlight, a smile lazing on her sleeping face, and for once, everything felt right with Lucy’s world.
Chapter Thirty-Two
She tried to disentangle herself from Nicole. Slipping her arm from around her waist was easy enough, but as she was just about to slide her other arm out from under her neck, Nicole tugged her back against her and sighed dreamily.
“Don’t go anywhere, coffee can wait,” Nicole demanded, her voice sleepy and gruff as she wrapped her leg around Lucy and held tight.
Lucy chuckled. “How did you know I was going to make coffee?”
“Because you can’t live without coffee.” She grinned and burrowed in, her arms wrapping around Lucy limpet-style.
“Ah, so you know my weakness already?” Lucy laughed and snuggled deeper under the covers, content to just lie there in this woman’s arms for eternity if need be.
They lay together like that for a few minutes, just looking at each other, stroking arms and faces. Tender kisses spoke so much more than words could.
“Thank you,” Nicole whispered, her tone suddenly serious.
“There is no need for thank you unless we're both saying it,” Lucy replied in all earnestness. She hadn’t woken up feeling this light and happy in so many years; it was all so foreign to her. She felt like she wanted to jump out of bed, climb on the roof, and shout it out to anyone that could hear.
“Okay, you can make your coffee now,” Nicole said, kissing her shoulder and moving to allow her out of the bed.
“You want one?”
“No, I dunno what’s wrong with me lately, but the smell of it just makes me feel nauseous.” She grimaced even at the thought of it.
“Oh, well I won’t have one then.” Lucy smiled, turning so she could snuggle back in.
“Don’t be silly, it's your morning drink. Go on, I’ll have a glass of orange juice, and can you bring me some of those peanuts?” Lucy jumped out of bed and padded naked to the kitchen. It was a little bit weird not having the kids here, but it was nice to have that moment of freedom like she used to have, of just being able to stroll around butt naked if she wanted to.
“Peanuts?” she mumbled to herself with a quiet chuckle.
She made the coffee and poured the juice. Searching the cupboards, she found the peanuts that Nicole wanted and placed them all on a tray. Carefully she carried it all through and placed it down on the bedside table beside Nicole. The brunette suddenly lurched upwards and ran to the bathroom, where she promptly threw up.
Lucy followed in after her and aided her in her distress, holding her hair out of the way and stroking her back.
“Oh god, I am so sorry,” Nicole said between bouts of vomiting.
“Hey, you can’t help being unwell, though I am not sure what could have caused it.”
“So embarrassing, I am really sorry,” she said, sitting up. She instantly felt much better. Lucy passed her a washcloth to wipe her face. “It’s the coffee, I took one sniff and…” She closed her eyes and tried to fight off the need to vomit again.
“I’ll go get you some water, why don’t you lay down for a moment?” Helping her to her feet and back into bed, Lucy disappeared quickly before she returned with a glass of cool water from the fridge and watched as Nicole took a long sip and thanked her for it.
“Feeling any better?”
“I’m not sure, I was fine and then the smell, it just hit me.” The colour had returned a little to her cheeks, but she still looked a little peaky in Lucy’s opinion.
“Might be a 24-hour bug or something. Why don’t you stay in bed and I’ll go and get the girls, then if you’re up to it we can have some breakfast.” Pulling on some sweatpants and a t-shirt, Lucy readied herself to make a quick trip.
“Okay, I don’t really feel up to arguing,” she said. Suddenly she went pale again and rushed back to the bathroom.
“Maybe I should just call Rita and ask her to keep the girls for a little longer?” Lucy suggested as she soaked the washcloth in cool water again and wiped it across the back of Nicole’s neck. “I don’t want to leave you.”
“Aww, you’re so sweet, ya know that? I’ll be fine, I promise, I’m a mom, I’m used to sickness.” The smile was genuine, but Lucy still felt torn.
“Are you sure?” Lucy looked so concerned that Nicole thought it might be the sweetest thing she had ever witnessed. Paul would never have sat with her and helped her like this. He would have screamed at her, told her how gross she was and to clean herself up before she came back out. Her eyes closed at the image of her husband looming over her, his face contorted, red and angry. She shook the image away, focused on the warmth of the hand that was rhythmically stroking down her spine. When she opened her eyes again, she found love staring back at her with apprehension.
“I’m okay, I promise. Get the girls and I’ll grab a shower and be right as rain by the time you get back.”
Chapter Thirty-Three
Arriving at the store, Lucy found Rain and Summer sitting on their haunches down the middle aisle placing tins the right way up along the bottom shelf. Lucy had never seen the shelves look so neat.
“Child labour back?” Lucy joked as she rounded the counter to find Storm at the till. Pushing her glasses back up her nose, she looked up at Lucy and grinned.
“Rita said I can have a job when I’m old enough.”
“Oh, right…well that’s good.” Lucy glanced around and found Rita smiling over at her from the deli counter. She finished serving her customer and then headed straight for Lucy, wiping her hands with a cloth that she dropped into a trash bin.
“Hey, have a good time?” she asked, smiling as the blush rose easily on Lucy’s cheeks.
“Uh, yeah,” she answered. She reached up and rubbed the back of her neck as embarrassment crept across her skin. “So, the uh…they behave?” She jutted her chin in the direction of the twins and changed the subject, much to Rita’s amusement.
“Sure did. We had a great time. Wanna cup of coffee while you tell me all about your night?” She was already moving out back to put the kettle on.
“Actually, I need to get back, Nicole isn’t feeling well.”
“Oh, what’s the matter with her?” Rita asked before Storm chipped in too.
“Is Mommy okay?”
Lucy reached out a hand and stroked her hair. “Yeah, she’s fine…just a little upset tummy I think.” And then to Rita she added, “She was sick this morning.”
“Maybe something she ate?”
“Maybe, but we mostly ate the same things, so…” She shrugged her shoulders and scratched her head. “Anyway, thank you so much for having them.�
��
“Anytime, Lucy,” Rita replied. “Grab some chicken soup, that’ll help settle her stomach I am sure.”
~E&F~
The girls were super excited. They talked non-stop all the way home about the fun they had had with Rita, and Lucy couldn’t hold back the smile at their exuberance.
“Can we go outside when we get back?” Storm asked from her seat between the twins.
“Sure, I just want to check on Mummy and then we can go for a walk maybe, how does that sound?”
Thankfully, Nicole was up and dressed and looking much healthier when they all piled in through the door. Lucy’s eyes searched her out in an instant. Her skin was back to its natural golden glow, and she was drinking some orange juice while standing at the sink.
“Hey beautiful, how ya feeling?” Lucy placed the back of her hand against her forehead to check for a temperature, but she felt fine.
“Much better, thank you.” She smiled up at Lucy.
“You don’t feel hot, so that’s good, right?”
“Yeah, I think I’ll be okay. You want some bacon and eggs?”
“I do, but I am going to make it, and you are going to sit down over here with the munchkins.” She laughed as she guided her to a seat next to Storm. The girls were very excited to tell her about the fun they had had with Auntie Rita, as she was now being called by all three of them.
“Are we having pancakes?” Summer asked hopefully, her little face all lit up like a kid at Christmas.
“Well, I don’t know,” Lucy said in all seriousness. “Have you been good while you were at Rita’s?”
“Uh huh,” she said nodding her head furiously.
“Then you can have pancakes!” she said, placing a finger on the child’s nose. She watched with delight as Summer smiled the biggest smile back at her.
“Yay!”
The Meant to Be Collection Page 17
