Nicole raised up and smiled. “I can’t believe Storm is putting up with that.” She moved off of the bed and towards the door. Looking back over her shoulder, she warned with a grin, “Don’t move, I am coming back.”
~E&F~
The noise ceased and Lucy breathed out the breath she was holding. She gave herself a little pinch to make sure she wasn’t dreaming. As the door opened, she looked up expecting to see Nicole, but instead it was the mini version. Storm.
“Hey sweetheart, you’re awake then?” Lucy said.
“Yeah.” She lingered at the door. In her old life she wouldn’t dare enter her parents’ bedroom without permission.
Sensing the youngster’s hesitation, Lucy put her fears to rest instantly. “You can come in ya know.”
So she did. At lightning speed she was on the bed, bouncing with excitement. “Are you and Mom getting married?” she asked, kneeling in the space Nicole had vacated.
“Uh, not right now,” Lucy answered, watching a small frown appear on Storm’s face, the little crease between her brows in evidence. “Why?”
“Well…If you and Mommy were married then Mommy would sleep in here with you all the time, right?”
Lucy nodded, a little unsure where this whole conversation was headed, and wishing desperately that Nicole would reappear any minute to save her from whatever the next question was.
“Then, can I have Mommy’s room?” She grinned, and Lucy breathed a sigh of relief. Was it really going to be this simple?
“I dunno, you might have grown up and moved out before that happens.” Lucy giggled at the wide-eyed look of horror on the young girl’s face. “Mummy might not want to marry me, and then what?”
“She will.” She nodded her head furiously, an all-knowing grin appearing. “People that love one another get married,” she stated matter-of-factly. “Everybody knows that, Luce.”
“Is that so? Well, I think it might be a little while, so don’t go getting your hopes up, okay?” Lucy explained. The little one spent a moment considering something before she smiled, grabbed a pillow, and threw it at Lucy. Laughing, they spent a few minutes in a pillow fight while Nicole stood at the door watching them.
“Don’t just stand there woman, help me! I’m being attacked by a munchkin!” Lucy called out to Nicole as she bounced a soft pillow against Storm.
Nicole had no choice but to come to her rescue. Grabbing a spare pillow, she joined in too. Before they knew it, there were two more small munchkins joining in on the action as Rain and Summer came bursting through the door too.
“Okay, truce!” Lucy shouted while laughing too hard to even lift a pillow. “Truce.”
Rain and Summer had no idea what a truce was, so they continued to bash pillows and giggle until they noticed everyone else had stopped. There was a lot of smiling going on lately, and it felt just the way a family should feel. Happy.
“Wow. So, what started that?” Nicole asked, out of breath and flushed from the unexpected exertion as she flopped down onto the bed and into the crook of Lucy’s arm, an arm that instantly wrapped around her shoulder to pull her closer.
Both Storm and Lucy pointed to each other.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
The afternoon was flying by as they spent some more time just hanging out by the lake. It was a hot day, so hot that the twins were stripped off and running around half naked, and Storm was in her swimsuit, reading in her spot.
Lucy looked down at herself. She was wearing skinny jeans and a long-sleeved top. An outfit for autumn, not summer. She stood up and limped her way back to the cabin. Stripping quickly, she found an old bikini and slipped it on, amazed that it still fit. She pulled on her robe and just as casually strolled back outside to the same spot next to Nicole.
Only the lower part of her legs was visible. A long pink line drew down the length of her left leg, tiny dots on either side of it where the staples had held her skin together. She had red marks either side of her knee from where the metal cage rods had held her bones in place. It wasn’t pretty. She stood there for so long that Nicole looked up at her, concerned.
“I…I’m gonna…” She looked at Nicole. Her eyes were sad, but determined, and she drew courage from the woman staring back at her. “I want you to see. I want you to know what you’re getting.”
“I know what I’m getting, Lucy.” Nicole’s eyes never left Lucy’s. “We both have scars sweetheart, yours are just visible. They don’t change who you are or why I am attracted to you.” She reached out a hand and gently squeezed Lucy’s arm. “But I understand how difficult this is for you, so you do what you have to.”
Lucy nodded. “I just want to prepare you, ya know, because it’s not…it’s everywhere, okay? When I was on the bus and it flipped…I was trapped, and the glass, the tarmac, it all….and I don’t want…” She blew out a breath. “I don’t want...the first time, ya know, I don’t want that to be the first time you see me.”
“It’s ok. Just show me.” The kids were sitting quietly playing with pebbles and rocks. Storm was still reading her book. It was just Nicole looking at her. Looking at her with love, not pity. Looking at her with admiration and tenderness. She took a deep breath, preparing herself for the look of horror she was sure would imprint itself on Nicole’s face when she finally saw Lucy and the full extent of her injuries. Nicole held her gaze as she slipped off the robe, and only when she thought Lucy was ready did she allow herself to look lower and take in the body on show to her.
Lucy wore a black bikini. The scarring that marked her shoulder went much lower, under the bra and out again at the bottom, down her torso to her hip and further still along her thigh. There was a crisscross of lines that smattered her torso area, her stomach. She turned slowly to allow Nicole’s eyes to rake over the back side of her body. More and more marks and scars scattered across her soft skin in lines of pink. It was horrifying, not to look at per se, but because she could tell just by looking at them all of the pain that Lucy must have suffered. Her left arm from the elbow upward and across her shoulder blade looked as though she had been dragged across the ground (which she had). Her skin was puckered and torn where pieces of grit and tarmac had embedded themselves.
When Lucy had rotated all the way around and Nicole had seen all she needed to, there was a silence that Lucy expected. What she didn’t expect was for Nicole to lean forward and place her lips against the rough patch of puckered skin that peppered her side. Her fingers traced the thick lines as her lips moved softly against her skin.
“Okay?” Lucy asked. It was a rhetorical question rather than an actual one. She was okay. That was her biggest issue right now. She had shown Nicole almost everything, and she was okay with it. Lucy was used to it; her scars didn’t bother her anymore to look at them. That was never her problem, well not for years anyway. Her issue had always been dealing with other people’s reactions to them. The questions and the pitying look she would get.
“Oh yeah... I am fine. Enjoying the view,” Nicole said, smiling against her skin.
Lucy was lost in the feeling of being home. Nicole hadn’t run from her, and she was still enjoying the feeling of being touched for the first time in many years. She barely noticed when little fingers touched her hand. Looking down, she found the little blonde head of Rain looking up at her, her eyes wide as saucers.
“Can we play in the water?” she said quietly. She hadn’t even noticed. This small child had looked at her, and yet not seen anything other than Lucy. To Rain, there was nothing to be frightened of.
“Yes, come on then.” She let herself be led to the water. Summer ran across to join them, and the three of them splashed around, squealing at each other. Storm looked up from her book and smiled at them before putting her nose back into the pages and carrying on. Everything was just perfect.
Chapter Thirty
“You’re not hot? It’s boiling out here,” Lucy said, drying herself off with the towelling robe she had used previously to hide behind. Laying it
down on the floor, she plonked down on top of it and got comfortable next to Nicole, the only one of the group still in clothes.
“I’m good,” Nicole replied, but she didn’t look at Lucy as she spoke. Instead, she bit her lip and looked away, an air of discomfort about her.
“What’s up?” Lucy probed gently.
“Nothing, I’m good,” she said, quickly glancing over at the woman she loved. She smiled shyly and looked away again, her line of sight focusing out across the lake.
“No, you’re not. I’m going to touch you,” Lucy warned before reaching out to her. Fingertips gently pressed against her cotton-covered thigh. “It’s a beautiful day, there is nobody around but us, and it is really hot, so, why don’t you want to enjoy it?”
“I am. This is me enjoying.” She sat back and took Lucy’s hand in her own, her fingers squeezing gently.
“Alright, I’m not going to push, but I think you like looking at me in my bikini, it’s only fair I get to see you,” she said with a wink, kissing her hand just as Rain shouted that she had found a fish.
It turned out it wasn’t a fish at all, it was just a candy bar packet that some lazy tourist had discarded without a thought for the environment. Lucy fished it out anyway and found the girls some nets so they could try and catch real fish, which they thought was one of the best ideas ever, especially when Lucy told them they could keep any fish they caught as pets.
When she turned around again, Nicole wasn’t there. Her lips tightened into grimace and she really hoped she hadn’t overstepped the mark when she had suggested changing into something cooler. It wasn’t a surprise really that Nicole might have some issues with her own body image; she was married to a complete arsehole after all.
She sat back down on a towel in her customary pose of face to the sun and relaxed. It wasn’t very long until she registered a presence next to her. She glanced sideways and saw Nicole sitting there very still, in her bikini.
“Wow,” Lucy blurted out. “Where have you been hiding?” She continued looking Nicole up and down. Nicole blushed but smiled shyly at the compliment. “You really have no idea, do you?” said Lucy, astonished. Nicole sat there looking blankly at the ground; she really didn’t. “Nicole, you…” She paused and leaned closer. “You are beautiful, stunning I mean… God, you’re just gorgeous.”
The dark-haired woman continued to stare at the ground, not knowing what to say. Compliments had been something few and far between these past few years, and when they had come, they had come in the shape of a drunken fumble, or when he wanted to show her off to his friends. Then she would be beautiful, amazing, such a wonderful mother or wife. Behind closed doors the compliments were less than appealing.
“You don’t believe me, do you?” Lucy asked gently, watching as Nicole shook her head slowly. “It’s okay, I am going to show you. Bit by bit, day by day, I am going to make you believe what I am saying because you are gorgeous, sweetheart.”
“I am far from perfect, Luce,” she said, her hand rubbing over her rounded tummy.
“Who wants perfect? I am not perfect, look at me,” Lucy argued back, swivelling around to face her.
“Your scars are because of an accident, I am just…” She stopped speaking as tears threatened to overflow.
“You’re what? What were you going to say?”
She shook her head and looked up to the sky, trying to ward off the tears. There were moments when she felt on top of the world. She felt like a normal, healthy part of society again, but then, there would be something that always pulled her back. Back to the life she had with Paul, where she was worthless.
“Tell me what you think is wrong with you.”
Nicole swallowed hard; it was difficult to explain, but she wanted to. After everything that Lucy had put aside for her, she knew she had to try. “I…I’m not in the best shape, since having the kids I mean. I...I…need to get back to the gym, but…”
“Woah. Wait up.” She reached over and caressed Nicole’s face with a scarred hand. “You think…you’re under the impression that you’re overweight? That somehow the way you look isn’t good enough?” She shifted onto her knees.
Nicole nodded furiously, glad to have finally gotten it out into the open so she could deal with Lucy agreeing with her and start working on shifting the pounds.
“Babe…god, no! No, sweetheart that is so wrong, so wrong!” Lucy said, cupping her face with both palms now so that she had to look at her. “That’s just what he told you to make himself feel better, to keep you from leaving him. I promise you he is a liar.”
“He said I am fat. That I was gross and not worthy of him, that he only slept with me out of duty.” She sobbed now and fell into Lucy’s arms. Storm looked up and was ready to run to her mother, but Lucy smiled and nodded at her. She had this. Storm nodded back and went back to reading her book, one eye still on them.
“Its ok babe, let it out.” She held her close, knowing that she needed this to start the healing that she needed to do.
Chapter Thirty-One
Now that Lucy was finally re-emerging back into the world around her, she found that she was looking forward to doing things that before she would have shied away from. She would do the school run and not think twice about saying good morning to the other parents dropping their children off. People would now say hello to her as they passed by in the street rather than cross the road or stare at the woman they found difficult to understand. There had been a couple of pitiful looks or questions from inquisitive children, but she dealt with them and held her head up rather than hiding underneath her hat.
The agreement to take things slowly had seemed like the perfect idea once upon a time on a couch not that long ago. But now, as the days turned into weeks and the end of June was almost upon them, moments of intimacy were becoming a battle. Kissing was now a given, at any opportunity. With the heat holding, bikinis had become the norm on days that Nicole didn’t have to work, and with the kids at school or with Rita, they had plenty of time to fool about and get to know one another more closely.
And now, with her confidence growing, Lucy was very keen to take Nicole on an actual date. She had spoken to Rita and she had readily agreed to look after the girls that night so that they could go out and have some fun. Nicole dropped them off at Rita’s place around 7 p.m.
“Well, don’t you all look cute?” Rita said as the girls filed through the door. Shouts of “bye Mom” and “see you soon” were hollered over shoulders as Summer and Storm made themselves at home in Rita’s house.
“Mommy and Lucy are going out,” Rain said, not understanding that Rita knew already.
“They are? Well, it’s a good thing you’re staying here with me then!” She smiled down and received a big grin in return.
The girls loved Rita; she had become like a surrogate aunt to them all. “You have a wonderful time with Lucy, we will be fine,” she said to Nicole. “We have ice cream and that movie you’ve all been talking about,” she said to the girls.
“Thank you, we shouldn’t be too late in the morning to collect them.”
“Don’t you worry about it. Enjoy the freedom.” She winked, and Nicole blushed before kissing her girls and making a hasty retreat.
~E&F~
Lucy was nervous. In her younger years, she had been the kind of woman who dated with all the confidence a pretty, happy-go-lucky girl in her prime should have. She was witty and cheeky, often trying her luck with girls who were out looking for a boyfriend. When she met Nicky though, everything changed in a heartbeat, and she no longer even looked at anyone else. She didn’t need to; Nicky was all she wanted to look at. They had fun, going out to bars and clubs. When the band took off and Lucy became famous, it barely changed anything, they were just more discreet.
Now, as she waited for Nicole to return, she could feel the butterflies fluttering in her tummy. She couldn’t sit still. She paced the room and checked her image in the mirror more than once. She had promised Nicole she wouldn�
�t hide behind her hat, that if the people in town couldn’t deal with her scars, then it was their issue, not Lucy’s, and if people stared or asked questions then they would deal with it together because Nicole was proud to be seen out with Lucy.
Nicole arrived back from Rita’s and wandered into the cabin to find Lucy waiting for her; she looked dashing, dressed simply in dark jeans and a red shirt, her long hair pulled up into a ponytail.
“You look great,” Nicole said, walking up to her and kissing her quickly on the cheek, so proud that she wasn’t hiding herself.
“Thanks, you look stunning though,” she replied, taking Nicole in. She was wearing the customary little black dress, with legs that seemed to go on forever. She was a sight for anyone’s sore eyes, but especially Lucy’s. “Are you ready to go?”
“Yes!”
~E&F~
They shared a meal that was simple and yet, just perfect. And apart from a couple of people who stared at Lucy for a few seconds, nothing spoilt the time they were spending together. There was a time when anyone staring at Lucy would have had her running for the door to hide, but here, with Nicole holding her hand across the table and glaring at them, she actually found the whole thing quite funny. She had scars, she could deal with it; if it didn’t put Nicole off, then she could deal with other people staring. After all, she liked it when Nicole stared at her.
They strolled through town back to the car hand in hand, sharing jokes and conversation as they went. It couldn’t be more comfortable.
“So, Juicy Lucy?” she asked, smiling. “I never did get to the bottom of that.”
Nicole blushed and tugged on her hand. “Okay, okay…I admit that I might have been telling Rita that I liked you.”
“Uh huh, and why was that?”
“Because she asked. Apparently, it was obvious to more than just Storm, but she wasn’t going to ask you in case it sent you scurrying back under your hat again.” She giggled and felt herself being tugged to a halt. Just for a second, she zoned back to a time when she wasn’t allowed to laugh or make fun and tease, but it was gone in an instant. The moment she looked at Lucy and into those honest eyes, she felt safe again.
The Meant to Be Collection Page 16
