Greatest Hits Mysteries Boxed Set (Books 1-4)

by Langtry, Leslie

  I usually loved flying. We always flew first class. The hot towel, the comfortable leather seats, more room than the others back in coach. I always reveled a bit in some elitist bastardry. But this flight was agony. Because every few minutes and few hundred miles brought me closer to the greatest dilemma I’d faced since they discontinued my signature hair gel a couple of years back.

  Part of me hoped Leonie would go into hiding and I’d never see her again. That would solve everything but my broken heart. But if she didn’t . . . if she confronted me, would I kill her? The thought of it alone caused an ache that felt like this heartburn I once got after making out with a fire eater (I’m serious).

  How could I have missed it? Of course that’s why Leonie got calls to work at odd hours. And the last night we spent together, she’d probably gotten word that she was the only one of the National Resources assassins left. That’s why she left so quickly. That’s what she meant when she said she had a lot going on professionally. Was she planning on going into hiding and not tell me?

  For a moment, my heart stopped. Had she been thinking that? Was she just going to drop off the face of the earth, never telling me, leaving me to wonder what the hell happened?

  I shook my head to clear it. This wasn’t about me. This was about Leonie. She now knew who I was and that I had tried to kill her. Maybe she thought I got involved with her just to keep tabs on her so I could kill her. Wow. I really didn’t like where this was going.

  What the hell was I going to do? I wanted to convince her I wouldn’t kill her – that I didn’t know who she was when we met – that my feelings for her were genuine. How could I do that? Either she was lying in wait to kill me, or she’d be gone from my life forever. Either way, both of us would be looking over our shoulders for the rest of our lives.

  Damn.

  CHAPTER THIRTY

  “Do I ice her? Do I marry her?”

  - Charley Partana, Prizzi’s Honor

  Gin threw her arms around me as I entered baggage claim. Liv must’ve told her, I thought dully.

  “I’m so sorry,” she said, over and over again.

  I nodded and in silence, the four of us collected our bags and loaded them into Liv’s minivan. Liv dropped me off at Gin’s house, where I found Louis eating peanut butter sandwiches.

  My heart came alive for the first time in the last twelve hours as my son jumped into my arms.

  “I really missed you, buddy,” I whispered in his ear.

  “I really missed you, Dad,” Louis cried out as he squeezed me so hard I saw spots. Good stranglehold, I thought proudly.

  “You broke your promise.”

  “I know. I shouldn’t have done that. Do you forgive me?”

  Louis looked into my eyes – which unnerved me a little bit. “No more travel without me. No matter what. Okay?”

  I nodded. He was right. I was a first-class asshole of a father. Louis seemed to accept my apology. Finally, I let him go, and he ran off to play with Romi. Gin offered me a cup of coffee, and I took it gratefully. Sitting there in silence, I slowly drained the cup. Gin stood, resting her back against the sink, drinking her own. I realized I was glad to have her with me.

  “What should I do?” I asked.

  “I don’t know, little brother. I wish I did.”

  Great. No help from her. But at least she was someone to talk to.

  “I don’t think you and Louis should go home,” Gin started carefully. “What if she decides to kill you?”

  “If you’d asked me that question last night, I would’ve said ‘let her.’ But I’ve got Louis to think about.” I drummed my fingers on the table. “I don’t think she’ll come after me. I think she’ll vanish and I’ll never see her again.”

  Gin nodded in response. “I really liked her. I could definitely see her in this family.”

  “I know. I guess it just wasn’t meant to be.”

  “So, what are you going to do?” Wasn’t that the $64,000 question.

  “I’m supposed to kill her. That’s what I’m contracted to do. Of course, I’m in love with her, so that’s not what I’m going to do. I don’t know.”

  Gin said nothing for a moment. It was a definite catch 22, and even my know-it-all sister couldn’t solve this one. She changed the subject.

  “I showed Louis the basement. He got so excited that I did a little training with him. I hope you don’t mind.” Last fall she had converted her basement into a child assassin’s lair for Romi’s and Alta’s training.

  “He’s an amazing kid, Dak. He’ll be the best Bombay ever. You should’ve seen it when he created the beginnings of a dirty bomb using Romi’s chemistry set. The kid’s got talent.”

  I smiled at that. Maybe it was my first real smile of the day. Whatever I decided to do, Louis had to remain my first priority.

  Eventually, Gin convinced me to stay with her. I tucked my son in and told her I needed to go for a drive to clear my head. Gin would’ve killed me if she knew I was stopping by my condo. But I needed some clothes and wanted to pick up a few things for Louis. I’d pretty much decided that Leonie would flee rather than confront me. After checking the perimeter outside, I decided it was safe to go in.

  I missed Louis. Yes, I knew he was safer with Gin. But it was so weird to walk into my condo alone. Wasn’t that the way I’d always wanted it? To be on my own? No ties to anyone? My nightmare scenario was always having to share living space.

  Wow. I’d changed. Because now the condo just seemed to be as bleak as a cinderblock room. Nothing felt right. I popped my head into the kitchen hoping to see Leonie making breakfast wearing nothing but my shirt. I entered Louis’s room and instead of wishing it was back to being a guest room, it felt so lonely.

  Louis wasn’t there to roll his eyes when I said something stupid. He wasn’t there to make some really strange remark about the exchange rate between the dollar and the Euro.

  Not knowing what else to do, I flipped on the TV. Survivor was on. Instead of grabbing a beer and relaxing, I felt a sudden urge for Kool-Aid and popcorn. Louis thought I should buy something more healthy for him to drink. Hell, I thought all kids wanted colored sugar water.

  I switched the television off. I threw some things in a bag. What a mess.

  A few short months ago, my life was perfect. Or so it seemed. I didn’t have to get up early every morning to get my son off to school. I had my pick of women to keep me company every night. No one told me I couldn’t do this or eat that now that I had a son.

  I was lying to myself. I wanted my kid, here on the couch with me. I wanted Leonie back in my bed. I wanted to take Louis to school and pick him up. And I wanted to crash funerals just to get a glimpse of that lovely redhead.

  The phone rang and I pounced on it, hoping it was my son calling to say goodnight.

  “I need to ask you something.” Leonie’s voice was chilling.

  “Anything. Come over,” I pleaded.

  “No.”

  “Okay. I’ll come over to your place. Or to Crummy’s.”

  “No, not there.” She paused for what seemed like a millennia. “Meet me at 1224 Adams Street.” She hung up before I could ask anything more.

  Well, she wanted to meet me. That was at least something, I told myself as I pulled into the parking lot of a local farm manufacturer. I was surprised to see the lights on and machines running this late. Then I remembered that this was how two of the Terminator movies ended and suppressed a shudder.

  “Leonie?” I called out. And then I noticed that while everything was running, there were no people anywhere. Was she going to kill me here? This really was like The Terminator. But was she the wuss Linda Hamilton, or the buff Linda Hamilton?

  She appeared about ten feet away and made no move to come any closer. I wanted to close the gap, but was afraid that might look too threatening, so I stood still.

  “I can’t believe you stalked me and used me like that.” Leonie shouted over the din. “I thought you really loved me.”
/>   “I do love you. I didn’t know until that moment in Portland that you were on my hit list!” Please believe me.

  “How can I believe you? Why should I?”

  I thought about that for a moment. It was understandable. I’d feel the same way. Damn. That wouldn’t make this any easier.

  “I don’t know how to convince you other than to tell you that you’re the only woman I’ve ever loved. If I thought you were an assassin, would I have let you get so close to Louis? My family? Jesus, Leonie! They all love you!”

  She paused for a moment and I could see that she was thinking about it. I couldn’t even imagine what was going on under all that red hair.

  “I’m sorry, Dak.” She was frowning. “I have to go. If you’re lying, than this is the best thing for me. If you’re telling the truth, then it’s the best thing for you.” She shrugged. “Don’t you see that?”

  I charged her, determined to hold her down until she listened. There was a loud bang behind me and I turned to look. When I turned back, Leonie was gone.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

  “I can’t seem to face up to the facts

  I’m tense and nervous and I can’t relax,”

  - Psycho Killer, Talking Heads

  I found myself drowning my sorrows at a bar. Actually, it was Algonquin’s Table, a place I used to come to pick up blondes. I’m not sure why I went there. Maybe it was the first place I saw on my way home.

  “You look unhappy.” A petite blonde pulled up a stool next to mine and ordered a Chablis.

  I didn’t respond.

  “Hey,” she purred. “What’s your name?”

  I turned to her, intending to blow her off. She was cute. No, she was smokin’ hot. Big, brown eyes, long, thick blonde hair and a body you usually had to pay a lot of money to get.

  “Dakota. And you are?” I wasn’t sure why I responded.

  “Eva. Nice to meet you, Dakota.” She was really on the make. Five months ago, she’d already be in my bedroom by now doing things she never thought physically possible. Did I miss those days?

  She chatted about absolutely nothing – to which I didn’t respond. It was pretty obvious she was looking for a good time. The old Dak wouldn’t have passed up an opportunity like this. And since Leonie was gone forever and I was lonely for the first time in my life, the old Dak was all I had left. Eva kept working me over – trying to get an invitation to my place. I ignored her, threw some money on the bar and left.

  Unfortunately, I’d realized that the bag with my and Louis’ clothes was still back at the condo. Unfortunately, Eva followed me home and forced her way past me as I unlocked the door.

  “This is nice,” she said. Turning to face me in the living room, she kissed me. Eva smelled really good, but my body wasn’t in any hurry to rise to the bait.

  “Mind if I use the powder room?” she purred.

  Powder room? Leonie would never call it that. She’d make fun of anyone who said something like that and I would laugh.

  “Sure. Down the hall, to your right.”

  While Eva was in the bathroom, I tried to figure out how to get rid of her. This chick was seriously pissing me off and I wanted her gone so I could go back to Gin’s and Louis. After what seemed like a long time, Eva came back.

  She pushed me to the couch and climbed onto my lap, her lips on mine. I pushed her off of me and scrambled to my feet.

  “What’s wrong?” She pouted.

  “This party is over,” I said pointing to the front door.

  “You don’t really want me to go, do you?”

  I nodded. I really wanted her to go.

  “What’s your story, Dakota?”

  “No story. Just a guy. Nothing big.” Wow. Not only was the old Dak gone, he apparently had undergone a lobotomy. Huh. Lobotomy sabbatical.

  “I just want to get to know you better.” Eva reached for my hand.

  “Look,” I started. “Don’t get me wrong, but I’m just interested.” Oh my God! It was like having an out-of-body experience. Who was that guy? Why was he turning down sex from a hot blonde? In the old days, he would’ve told any one of a hundred lies just to get her in the sack.

  There was a flash of anger in her eyes, but she quickly hid it. This chick was kind of scary.

  “Let me guess, you just broke up with someone. Is that it?” Eva’s voice regained its purr. “Maybe I can help you forget about her for a little while.”

  She started kissing me and I pushed her back, “No. I don’t think so.”

  “Well, why don’t you just close your eyes and pretend I’m her?” Eva started kissing my neck, her hand reaching between my legs.

  “Only if you have a Woody Woodpecker tattoo,” I muttered – I thought – to myself.

  “I don’t work for National...” She sat up sharply, recognizing her mistake.

  I grabbed her wrist. No tattoo. But she knew something. Eva scrambled to her feet and pulled a gun from a thigh holster. Now, why didn’t I feel that earlier? Seems to me I would have. Of course, I’d been too busy playing with alliteration. Idiot.

  “Damn it. They told me you were partial to blondes!” Her eyes burned, “I dyed my hair for this gig. Now I have to do this the hard way.”

  I stood only a few feet away from her. I’d have the advantage if I charged. The old Bombay Family nursery rhyme popped into my head, rush a gun – run from a knife.

  “Who are you?” I asked calmly, as if a gun wasn’t pointed at my chest.

  “Never mind!” She fairly spat the words out. Wow. This bitch could go from zero to psycho in ten seconds. “Shit! Shit!” she cursed herself.

  “Look.” My thoughts raced and I wondered if Leonie had sent her. Maybe National Resources had more than just five players? No, she said she didn’t work for them. “What is it you want? Maybe I can help.”

  “Doc Savage needs something from you. I don’t want to hurt you. I just need some files. Then I’ll go.”

  I exploded, “I’m so sick of this Doc Savage bullshit! And if you didn’t want to hurt me, why send those men after me? And why the gun now? What goddamned files do you want?”

  Eva actually smirked. “I need the gun because you’re supposedly dangerous. And I don’t know which files. I was just supposed to knock you out and let this guy in once you were unconscious. He’d look for the files and then we’d be out of here.”

  I shook my head, “Why are you telling me all of this?”

  “I don’t know! I’ve never done this before!” She started screaming and forgetting she had a perfectly good weapon in her hand, picked up a book from the end table and threw it at me.

  I dodged it neatly (I’m not a total loser), then dove for Eva and the gun. It only took me a few seconds to subdue her. She was telling the truth. She really hadn’t done this before.

  I managed to handcuff her by the ankles and wrists to one of the kitchen chairs.

  “What time was this Doc Savage coming by, anyway?”

  “One hour. He’ll be here in one hour.” The fight had pretty much gone out of our girl. I didn’t push it. Whoever was in charge would be here soon and then I’d find out what’s going on.

  In the meantime, I had a couple of cups of coffee to wake up so I could think. Eva wasn’t much use to me as a conversationalist so I ignored her.

  None of these Doc Savage attacks made any sense. They all seemed to focus on wanting something in my home. Well, except for the dude in the men’s bathroom. Eva said they didn’t want to hurt me, just wanted some files. What kind of files? I wasn’t much of a paperwork guy. I didn’t really have any use for it. Paris, on the other hand, kept everything all the way back to his first tooth.

  No matter how many times I thought about it, it didn’t make any sense. If the Council wanted something from me, they’d just send Grandma and her Uzi. Leonie was the only one left from National Resources. And I was pretty sure she was long gone.

  All I did know, was that I’d had too much coffee and a full bladder. I stood a
nd winked at Eva and headed to the bathroom. After a few moments of relief, I stepped into my hallway and felt a sharp, sudden pain on the back of my head. There was another blow before I could turn around and everything went black.

  Imagine my surprise when I woke up alive (and just wishing I was dead) and in pain on the floor. A large knot on the back of my head indicated the ‘how.’ And a bent fireplace poker on the floor demonstrated the ‘what.’ I staggered from room to room searching for the ‘why.’

  My condo had been ransacked. Drawers hung open like astonished mouths, their contents all over the floor. Cushions were everywhere but on the furniture and my clothes had attempted to make a break for it from my closet.

  To my shock, nothing was damaged. I’d expected that. There was a huge mess, but nothing was ripped or broken. Of course, Eva was gone. But I was pretty sure she hadn’t done this on her own.

  Without knowing what else to do, I called Paris. He came over and helped me clean everything up.

  “It’s got to be associated with National Resources.” Paris said. “You said this chick mentioned them. Who else would it be?”

  I picked up the last spoon from the kitchen floor. Man, these were some nice spoons. I didn’t even remember where I got them, but they were really nice.

  “Dak.”

  “Oh, sorry,” I shoved the flatware into the drawer. “I’m still a little dizzy from the two blows on the head.”

  “I think we need to tell the Council about everything.”

  I looked up sharply, “What? No! They’ll insist I kill Leonie. I can’t do that.”

  “May I remind you that you’ve had three attacks – two in your own home? It isn’t safe to bring Louis back here until we close out this deal.”

  My perfect posture slumped. “I didn’t think about that.”

  “And it looks like the N.R. guys have more resources than we thought. Maybe we just can’t get them all by ourselves.”

  Leonie or Louis. That’s what it came down to. “I can’t do it.” I shook my head. “I can’t sick the Council on Leonie.”