Bittersweet Love

by Davids, Jesse

  She fell on her bed sobbing as she lost the only person that ever understood how she felt, ever understood the things she did and why she did them. The love of life that she lived for almost a year, sadly disappeared on the pillow of her bed. Hours and hours rolled by her eyes as she couldn't find the courage to walk a normal life, the life she received from a stranger that turned her life around.

  Athena stood up quickly and ran down to the parking lot, day-dreaming to find his car parked at the same spot he chose over and over again. Right under the street lamp, 4 parking spots away from the entrance to the dorms; she found nothing but more heartache.

  As Athena stood in an empty parking spot, accepting the fact that he left, the promises that were made drifted away with a cold depressing wind.

  Monitored by her mother’s computer screen, Melissa felt no remorse for her actions. She was committed to the dirty game being played by governmental agencies; Trying to prove herself to the highest chairs in the industry.

  Athena’s point-of-view changed in a matter of seconds, as the old mindset of relationships, broken hearts and sad stories realistically took the same effect as it did years ago. She rushed back to the classroom and took the painting he painted of her, vowing to keep it as long as she lived, because she felt something most people dream about. Vowing to never give up, waiting for a present that may not return to its former glory. But she couldn't stop the oblivion growing more and more within her mind.

  On another pillow, confusion grew. Allison called Will numerous times back to back. Just as she was about to give up trying, Will finally replied with a text message.

  Apartment B2, Second floor; street number 29; down west of Broadway. Come alone.

  Finally after 2 days of silence Will made an appearance after settling down in his new loft apartment, filled with furniture. Allison positioned herself upright, grabbed her black coat that was left hanging on her wardrobe handle and left Bianca to deal with her dirty complaining by herself. “Hey! You can’t just leave like that you know!” Bianca cried out for someone to complain to, a friend that she could tell her deepest secrets to. Allison waved her off and exited the door, slamming it behind her as she walked fast to the entrance of the dorm building.

  Allison waited for a taxi to pass by; after 5 cab drivers passed her by she relentlessly began to walk to her destination, in mind to see Will again after 2 days of being M.I.A. Will was standing by the window looking down, anxiously looking around to spot Allison, as it became a game of where Waldo is, surrounded by a dozen people. Will took a seat right next to the fish tank, with all sorts of exotic fish swimming around. He tapped the miniature glass aquarium with his index finger, only to see the fish scatter back into their tiny little homes.

  Will sat patiently waiting while looking through his phone, watching television from a distance. The apartment walls were an off-cream color, with a dash of brown in between. All the furniture was white, with black compliments; like cushions and kitchen chairs with lights dangling down from the ceiling resembling a spot on figure of UFOs.

  Allison knocked on the door, fixing her hair as the wind didn't reside on her side for the remainder of the day. Will jumped up quickly, grooming himself in front of the mirror right next to the bathroom before opening the door.

  Act casual, and don't stutter Will. This is what you have been waiting for. A partner in crime, and a lover for life; so don't screw this up.

  Will nervously opened the door. “Hey baby!” He said. “Hey sweetie!” Allison replied. Will hugged her with open arms, holding on to her tightly, realizing what he missed so dearly for only 2 days. “Come in, welcome to our new crib.” Will spoke, excited to see her response. “Wait, you said our crib. What does that mean?” Allison looked around, impressed by the setup he chose for a loft apartment. “Yes, our crib, I was thinking why wait, why not make it official for once.”

  Will replied with a deep tone, scared of what she might think.

  Trying to keep himself calm and sweat free, Will walked into the kitchen as Allison took a tour into the bedroom without replying to Will’s proposal. “What do you think?” He yelled from downstairs. “Wait!” Allison yelled back, confused but excited at the same time. She walked back downstairs to where he stood. “Are you asking me something Will?” Allison threw a pensive face at Will, hoping he caught the hint. “I am asking you, to be my girlfriend and move in with me.” Will laid it out on the table for her to find, the little pieces that made him feel invincible whenever she's around him.

  Allison stared him dead in the eyes, making sure the decision she's about to make won’t affect her for the rest of her life. “Can I think about it?” Allison turned around and smiled the biggest smile she has expelled from her inner emotions. Making sure Will couldn't see her overflow with joy. She quickly turned around to face him, running up to him as she jumped into his arms. “I’d be honored to be your girlfriend and much more.” She smiled and kissed him on his lips, passionately for the first time. Will’s heart beat increased tremendously pounding outside of his chest as he held her tightly in the air. 2 minds perfectly set out for each other by fate itself, as they came together to be one.

  As he looked through the windows of her soul, he found a piece of him in it; to be complete with her, and without. A police siren went off, bringing them back to where they were before. Allison brushed her hair over her ear, looking down at the floor as if she saw her own reflection in it, shy to look at Will once more as feelings began to show its true, natural side. Will coughed in a rather sarcastic way. “Anyway, do you want some juice?” He asked.

  Allison laughed hard, nodding her head vigorously, covering her mouth with her jacket. Allison took a seat in the living room, thinking of how all of this is going to work out; If her mother would approve or not. Thoughts rushed through Allison’s mind like a bull that has been set free from its cage, after years in confinement. Allison finally found someone she could be herself with, after sitting by herself as realization struck, Will stood in front of her with a glass of orange juice and a yellow bendy straw poking out at the top of the glass.

  “Thank you,” Allison gestured to Will to sit down next to her. “So what do you think?” Allison asked. “What do I think about what?” Will replied confused. “When I should move in.” Allison shyly took a sip of her juice, gazing at him gently. At that moment Will reached into his back pocket and took out a spare key he made for the apartment just for her. “How about now?” Will replied, fascinated at Allison’s reaction as her eyes became larger than life. Will lovingly opened her left hand, and placed the key on her palm and closed her hand into a fist. “I can help move your stuff today.” Will added as he reached in for a kiss, kissing her dark red cheeks that blossomed like a flower.

  A few minutes later, after countless debating of who would get which side of the bed, they finally made their way down to the parking, to the temporary rental Will has hired for himself. Trying to set his life straight step by step, hoping Allison would make it worthwhile in the end. “Hey, where were you on exam day?” Allison asked as she got in the car. “I took the exam, don't worry. Everything was so hectic I barely had time to even check my phone, and on top of that I wanted to surprise you with this new place I bought.” Will smiled cheerfully, trying not to think of Daniel, as he could feel his presence like it never left.

  “Oh al right, did your parents help you out with the apartment by the way?” Allison strapped in her seatbelt, as Will drove off heading straight to the campus. “Yeah, my dad has a business going on and since I'm the only son, I get a share out of the profits that the company gets.” Will squealed on the inside, torturing himself by the lies his tongue have produced. Looking up to the sky, he could only think of when the lying can finally stop. When he can completely open up to Allison with the deepest secrets he hasn't told a single soul. As he wanted to share everything with her, no matter how crazy it may sound. To Will it was a matter of not losing the only person he could, and ever would care about.<
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  Will noticed Allison’s eyes, piercing in to his self-image. “Is there something on my face?” Will asked while looking into the vanity mirror. “No, but can’t I look at you now?” Allison giggled, looking at what she calls perfection.

  Doubts and insecurities caught Allison’s attention, for she never knew someone could love her back so dearly. Scared of the emotions to let someone, a stranger completely into her life; The thought of commitment, honesty and to also be true to her partner excited her in every way possible, as she, a hopeless romantic, could prove to life itself that romantic fairytales can in fact come true.

  At the dorms, Will parked his car under the very street light Daniel used to park their car. Will walked to the back of the car to open the trunk, taking out one big brown box with red duct tape as the wind blew hard and the sun made its final appearance on the horizon, slowly yet surely vanishing. Will and Allison ran into the building, straight to the second floor where Allison’s dorm situated. Allison barged in the dorm, quickly packing her things in the duffle bag she came with, throwing useless books she wouldn't ever get to use in the trash can.

  Bianca woke up from her afternoon nap, confused at what’s happening before her eyes. “What are you guys doing?” She peeled her eyes, trying her best to come to her senses. “I’m moving, you sure you can handle being alone by yourself? Oh wait, I’m sure you can.” Allison laughed hard; as pictures popped up in her mind of the first time she met Bianca. “Please don't bring up the past Allison.” Bianca moaned, holding her head as it suddenly felt heavy. Will held his head down; not wanting to waste any time as he quickly packed everything in a box.

  Bianca got up, slowly walking to Allison, coming up to her ear Bianca whispered to her. “Did you fuck him yet?” Allison quickly removed her ear, thinking of how dirty her roommate truly is. Bianca giggled and walked into the bathroom with no guilt hovering over her shoulders. Will taped the box shut, after making sure everything was in the box; making sure he won’t have to enter the dorms building ever again. They walked down the corridor as Allison quickly paid a visit to the dorm security office, giving him the keys to her once owned dorm. “Baby, can you open the back door for me please.” Will mumbled while holding the box, thinking of how heavy it got so fast. Allison rushed and opened the door, as Will placed the box on the seat quickly.

  Will shut the car door and instantly found himself opening the door to their apartment. “That was weird.” He stated while walking straight up stairs, putting the box down by the edge of the bed. “What was weird?” Allison was confused, trying to figure out where Will ran off to in the last couple of minutes.

  Will didn't reply, making Allison more worried about what’s going on. She pushed him on the bed, and firmly sat on top of him ready to interrogate the subject at hand. “What’s wrong? Talk to me.” Allison demanded answers, hoping to god she's not the reason why he's acting so strange lately.

  “Nothing is wrong my love, I'm just trying to process everything right now.” Will chuckled, slanting his head enjoying a nice view of her cleavage. “Details sweetheart, I want details, and my eyes are up here by the way.” Allison caught him looking down under, covering her cleavage to want his full attention. “Sorry, can’t help but stare, you have the most perfect pair of boobies I've ever seen. And to answer your question, I just never thought I’d start a normal life like this, with someone I love so dearly.” Will smiled, looking into her eyes, releasing butterflies in Allison’s stomach.

  “Love so dearly?” Allison asked. “Yes, I love you Allison, with all of my heart. Just be sure not to fuck that up or else I’ll cut your clit off, deep fry it, and make you eat it.” Will winked at her, tittering in his own enjoyment. “Well, Mr. Baker, I love you too, and if you ever decide to cheat on me. I will without a doubt, chop your dick off and anal rape you with your own dick.” Allison giggled as they set the terms, clearly making consequences for every selfish action they might make ahead. Will grabbed her waist, flipping them over so that he could be on top, between her legs. Allison gasped as she felt an erection coming from Will. She opened her legs wider to feel more of him, kicking the box down in the process.

  Love once again took its toll, its price dangled down from the ceiling, witnessing a passionate, intimate and strong sexual bond being made, drawing them closer to each other.

  Chapter 14

  Part II

  In her lonely cave she once thought became a room, turned more into a dull memory, a florescent light that kept blinking, on and off. Graduation soon ended, in broken hopes and lost dreams. Athena wanted to go back in time, to a place where she felt whole and not torn once again. Thinking to herself, what has she done in life to deserve this kind of treatment? One by one everyone disappeared, back to being the ants she never knew. Living a normal life soon hit Athena in the face that she would never be able to recover from a heart that’s bleeding nonstop.

  Nothing felt the same after Daniel left, her world flipped upside down in an emotional rollercoaster that’s about to tip over the edge. Athena found it hard to wake up in the morning, looking for a job that wouldn't give her any joy, as the joy she once felt has left her in ruins; it left her to fight for the things she once believed in.

  For the sake of her own sanity, she chose closure from the one person she thought she knew. Athena moved back into her old apartment which she shared with her mother over the winters they had alone, drinking hot coco watching series until they both fell asleep, back to a time where she felt complete. Without a broken heart that needed to be mended.

  In the coming fall Athena moved back into that same apartment that has been left for her on her mother’s will. Gradually she settled in, as long nights turned into awful nightmares, scared that she might in fact forever be alone. Jenny checked up on her now and then, but only for the benefit of Melissa, to see how the experiment took a grave turn. Yet again no remorse was felt on the other end of the world.

  After 3 months, of battling herself to stay strong and keep a positive mind set. Melissa came and lived with her, to keep a close eye on her herself, as she was committed to prove a point that has been implanted in her brain; that love, doesn't exist. A mere illusion, a trick played by the brain to think you are actually connected to someone, to a complete stranger that can enter your life at any minute. Love is only blind until the point of realization occurs, that you did not love your significant other at all. But how can you think you love someone so much, to the point living without them isn't an option?

  Winter fell short, as droplets of rain still hung on tightly to the leaves of trees. The sun was out, but was unable to provide any heat to New York City as the temperature dropped to -3’C. Athena woke up cold, trying to cover herself with her robe as she walked into the living room. Throwing wood into the fireplace to start a fire, she moved old newspaper in-between the wood to let it burn faster.

  Athena made sure not to make any noise, as she didn't want her mother awake at 6 in the morning. She grabbed her mug and made tea, retracing her footsteps back on to the couch with a book in hand. The fire slowly began to heat up the apartment as Athena curled up in a blue blanket next to the fireplace, as the image resonated on the cover of her book.

  Ah, I missed you old book, you were always there for me; Thank you.

  She thought to herself, for when Daniel came into her life, she completely forgot about reading any sort of book, as she was living her books instead.

  Page after page turned, words had no feeling, no meaning to her anymore. Athena looked above the fireplace, only to see what he has created in his absence. A painting to remind her of all the good, and simply to forget the bad; but that was not so easy for Athena’s heart to bear.

  Athena’s eyes became droopy; sleep took her to a better place than her reality has turned out. A place where she found confinement in every sense of the word, but more or less it felt like a risk she was willing to take, to see his face one last time. The book she read folded neatly on top of her chest, as sh
e breathed slowly with her eyes indicating she has entered the third phase of sleeping, with the fire light shining on her pink cheeks, creating a mirror effect so small that it can’t be seen by the naked eye.

  Noon struck as the clock situated by the hallway sounded, waking Athena up with a sudden fright. The fire burnt out, as the heat lingered in the air. She sat upright, looking at the time, thinking when she should get ready, for the gallery started at 4 in the afternoon. Athena stood up taking her mug with her to put in the kitchen sink, wondering why her mother hasn't woken up yet.

  Athena quickly walked to her mother’s room, knocking on the door in case she was still sleeping. “Mom?” She whispered in a loud screechy tone. She received no reply, and proceeded to open the door with the mind set of jumping on her mother to wake her up. The bed was empty, the room was cold and a dark presence could be felt from the door way. Athena walked in slowly, looking around for her mother to appear, yelling at her to knock for once in her life.