The Princess and Her Rogue

by Sheritta Bitikofer

  Nate didn’t seem to care or notice that as Kiara let her hands fall, she let her fingers linger over the back of his head, neck and shoulder muscles. He shuddered under her touch, but otherwise, he didn’t move. She quickly stepped away and wrapped her arms around her stomach as she felt herself tremble as well.

  The deer was still unaware of their presence, grazing in ignorant peace. Nate released the arrow. It sped through the air and stuck firmly in the doe’s thick neck. The animal tried to prance off, but it soon tumbled to the ground in defeat. Nate ran after it, unsheathed his knife and stabbed the doe in the heart to ensure its death. Kiara didn’t like to see such a beautiful creature killed. But, she was too hungry to mourn the doe for long.

  When she rejoined Nate at the carcass, he had already slung the doe onto his shoulders as he did before and began to walk off in the direction of the camp, but not before giving her a kind and thankful smile.

  Back at the camp, everything was still the way it was, and Kiara didn’t expect it to be any different. Who would be out here in the middle of nowhere to steal their things anyway? Nate went right away to skinning and cutting the deer down to edible proportions, but Kiara had no interest in watching the nasty gore so she set off to retrieve firewood. She had no idea if they would be staying in the same place one more night. Nate hadn’t specified if he wanted to get moving at all today. She was rather thankful for the break in walking, but she didn’t know what she would do with such free time. Back home, she would read, practice her archery or socialize with her family. Out here, there was only Nate and the wilderness to occupy her.

  As she walked along an unmarked path in the woods, looking for small and medium sized sticks to use for kindling a fire, Kiara began to think about what was lingering in her heart.

  She never really gave much thought to it. She had her passions, but that was all her heart ever really longed for. She never recalled being in love or having a crush on any man or boy. Her childhood was very sketchy and unclear, but she knew for a fact that she never loved a man. She never felt the way she did now.

  Kiara was sure that she was feeling something for Nate. She didn’t know if it was the desire for a closer friendship or something more, but there was something there. Over time, she began to feel warm and protected, as if she was under the care of her brother. At other times, she felt a fire burn inside her that couldn’t be kindled by mere friendship. The way he looked at her, the way he smiled to her, touched her, kissed her… It was something completely foreign and strange, yet alluring.

  It felt as if her heart and mind were being drawn away from rational thinking. She felt as if clouds were cradling her whenever Nate would so much as glance at her. It was unnatural and at the same time, it was thrilling. She never wanted to stop feeling that way. Sure, her stomach took a beating every time he would touch her or her eyes would wander over his body, but that was something she could bear with.

  Was she actually beginning to think she would want to spend more time with Nate than what could truly be allowed? As she thought about where the end of this journey led, she felt like taking Nate’s own knife and stabbing it into her chest. There was no way she wanted to go back home. Yes, she missed her father, Justin, Eshean and all of her family and friends, but she didn’t want to leave Nate’s presence. Even now, not very far off from him, she felt more alone and empty than ever. And with the knowledge of going back to Sir Claude still fresh in her mind, she knew she would have rather died than go back home.

  Sir Claude was indeed a gentleman and could give her a comfortable living. She did hate having to rough it outdoors, but maybe she could learn to live with it. She may not have wanted to roam the countryside like Nate would, but maybe having a nice little cottage out in the forest would be nice. Kiara could clean the home, feed chickens, milk a cow, tend a field, have a garden… As she thought about all the wonderful ideas of living in the country, she began to grin. Then, as she mentally listed all the things she would do, one task came to her mind very clearly and suddenly: cooking dinner for Nate.

  Nate? Why not Sir Claude or for herself? It was a reckless thought, an unwarranted thought. It was like when she wanted to shout someone’s name, but a completely different name came out. It was an honest mistake then, but this “cooking dinner for Nate”? She even unconsciously added the “for” in there to make it seem like she would have to cook dinner for someone else besides her… And why not? Living in the country would be lonely and she would need some kind of company… But Nate?

  Kiara glanced back towards the clearing where the camp was. She could just barely hear Nate’s blade shaving into the flesh of the deer and see his back moving with the motions. Would she really want to cook for him? Would she want to live with him? Her heart went ahead and replied with: Why not?

  She gripped her abdomen as her stomach lurched under her skin once more. Suddenly, as if under some girlish fantasy spell, Kiara began to think about the possibility of marrying Nate, living with him, having children together, being in love… In love?? Marrying?? Children??? Kiara slapped herself across the face to stop the hallucinations. There was no way in heaven or hell that she would ever marry Nate or do anything but travel with him. Why was she even thinking that? She had never thought of marrying anyone, ever! But, it was beginning to seem like a good idea.

  Reality hit her like a ton of bricks and she settled herself on a log so she wouldn’t fall over. As she sat there, she shook her head and hugged herself, staring at the ground, wishing she had never left home. Whatever this feeling was towards Nate, it had to be killed. It had to stop. She was engaged to Sir Claude. As soon as she got back home, she would realize how nice it was to be within the confines of four walls, with a nice comfy bed and people who love her. No dirt, no trees, no wild animals that could eat her. She was a princess. She didn’t have what it took to live in the wild. She had to put this silly fantasy out of her mind. It was wrong and useless to dream about such things. She had an obligation to herself, her family and her father. There was no way that any relationship with Nate would go further than friendship.

  This whole trip was crazy in Kiara’s mind. She couldn’t keep going like this. She needed to get a grip. She couldn’t falter and forget herself. Not now, when she was half way home. Nate probably doesn’t even like her in return, so it was hopeless even if she wasn’t a princess. She had to put Nate and whatever feelings she had for him out of her mind. It could never happen. It would never happen.

  Kiara took deep breaths as she felt her heart break two ways; one half for her family and one half for Nate.

  Chapter 10

  To Kiara’s disappointment, because of their hunting trip, which took longer than expected, right after lunch Nate had decided for them to travel after dark, to ensure that they would make their ten mile quota for the day. All the way, Kiara tried to keep her mouth shut, but it was hard - as usual.

  She had finally come to the disastrous conclusion that she did like Nate. Probably more than she should have. And she wasn’t sure where this feeling came from. She had a feeling that it was only because of his good looks, because there was no way his personality could spark this fire in her heart. Kiara hardly knew anything about him to begin with and he was so ellusive that there was probably no chance that she would learn anything new about him.

  The longer Kiara had to cope with the fact that she liked a man she hardly knew, she also had to deal with the reality of who this particular man is. She couldn’t forget back when the bandits had confronted them. He was a murderer. She was too, when she remembered shooting down those men who tried to harm Nate. But, he had killed far more people that she could even count. He might have even been the culprit behind mysterious murders in Aleph over the past ten years. When she thought about how Nate fought mercilessly in that clearing, it made her shudder - and then swoon at the idea that he would be willing to fight that ferociously for her safety. She shook the idea out of her head.

  And besides the fact that he was a stra
nger and a murder, he was also not of noble birth. A commoner, a peasant, a rogue. That was the main reason that they could never have a relationship, even if he did return the feelings. She was a princess and she had to marry either a prince or someone who has some kind of stature in society. There was no way she could marry anyone who was born in a hut or out in the wild. Her father would never consent to such a thing. Her father preferred that she marry not for love, but for wealth and status. It was a hard road she traveled upon, but she had to do it. It broke her heart.

  When they had finally arrived to the base of the mountains, Nate decided to set up camp for the night. According to Nate, they should have reached Mem’s Pass by then, but when Kiara looked to the east and west, she saw no sign of a pass.

  “Where’s the pass?” she asked when they had built their fire.

  “It should be just a little east of here,” he replied, not looking up to her. Ever since the hunting trip, he had been even more aloof than before. He didn’t look at her and he hardly talked to her.

  “I don’t see any sign of a pass towards the east,” Kiara said.

  “It’s across the Kaph river.”

  “Where’s the Kaph river?”

  “It’s the river that flows towards the Field we went through.”

  “I thought this part of the country was uninhabited?” Kiara questioned. She reasoned that if a piece of land, mountain or river had no name, then it hadn’t been discovered by people yet. If it did have a name, then people must have lived near by. That was a hope for Kiara, but she tried not to hold onto it too tightly. Nate could have named it himself.

  “Across the river there’s a few signs of civilized life. It was named long ago. It’s only the south half of the river that hasn’t been named. A few miles back it splits off into Waw Creek, which runs twenty miles east into Deceiver’s territory.”

  Kiara nodded in understanding and watched him as he cut off pieces of meat for their dinner. The rest of the dark evening was spent in silence. Kiara didn’t say one word. Nate didn’t either. It was so exceedingly awkward that it just wasn’t natural, even for Nate.

  Luckily, though, Kiara was so exhausted that it wasn’t hard to fall asleep. Maybe if she slept, the feelings for Nate would melt away.

  She had no dream that she could remember, but when she awoke again, the clearing was as dark as the night around them. Nate had let the fire go out. Kiara squinted, finding it still difficult to see anything, even though the moon above was shining bright and the smoldering ambers of the fire gave off some dim light.

  Nate was gone. Gone and nowhere in the clearing. But, she was far too tired to worry about it. She tried to rationalize that he was probably just gone to the bathroom or out to get more firewood. Kiara sighed, looked up at the position of the moon to clock the time, then let her head down to go back to sleep. There was no reason to lose her head about him being gone.

  She woke up again and the first thing she checked in her sleepiness was the moon. If she was correct, it’d been three hours since she woke up the first time. It might have been pretty close to midnight, if not later.

  Kiara rolled over to face the fire, which was completely blackened now without even a hint of embers. She expected to see Nate laying there, fast asleep. But, to her shock, he was still gone! He’d been gone for way too long. It shouldn’t take him over three hours to relieve himself or collect firewood.

  Her dreary sleepiness was obliterated by a full awareness of her situation. She was in a clearing, in the middle of the woods, defenseless. She didn’t have her big strong mountain guide to take care of her. And what’s worse, maybe some kind of animal came in while she was asleep and ate Nate or if he was lost in the woods somewhere or if he abandoned her out here to die. This was not good. Kiara didn’t have the strength yet to move and investigate his sleeping mat, but she didn’t smell anything rotting, so he must have not been eaten. Either way, he was still gone and she was vulnerable. Her circumstance was not good. Panic gripped her chest.

  She pushed herself up to a sitting position and tried to peer through the murky blackness of the night to see if he had perhaps just been sleeping off towards the edge of the clearing. She thought it might have been possible that he was breaking his promise of getting a good night’s sleep and was patrolling around camp. Kiara still couldn’t see a thing.

  So, feeling her heart thumping and blood racing behind her ears, she crawled over to where she had seen the sack last. Her fingers felt through the grass, but the sack was missing too. Nate was gone and he had taken their supplies. Maybe he had abandoned her?

  Continuing her blind, frantic search around the fire, she found the bow and quiver of arrows. He must have had some intention to come back. That bow and quiver, even if he had no use for it, would be worth some money at a trader’s post. Kiara sat back up on her heels and sighed, thinking.

  Why would Nate leave with the sack, but not the bow and arrows? Why would he be gone this long anyway? Kiara let her hands graze over the grass again and she found the flint that Nate used to light the fire earlier. She tried her luck at it, grabbing a bit of the old firewood and striking the flint to make bits of spark flash in the dark.

  After some hard effort, she made a flame at the end of a cluster of sticks. She determined that should last her a while, so she held it up like a torch and glanced down the multiple paths that led out of the clearing. Now, which one did Nate take? Kiara randomly picked one that led towards the river, wrapped her blanket around her shoulders and started out on her search, thinking that perhaps he had gone there to take a bath or fish, or something.

  Kiara tried to stay positive that she would find Nate, but her heart couldn’t help but doubt. The wiser thing would have been to just wait till morning when there was more light to search by. Nate was a big boy and he could take care of himself, but Kiara knew full well that she wouldn’t be able to sleep for the rest of the night as long as Nate was missing.

  The torch’s yellow light illuminated the woods around her, but it didn’t help much due to the thickness of the shrubbery and vines that hung from the trees. She saw everything but Nate. And luckily, she saw nothing else living. Besides her, it seemed that only the crickets were awake.

  Kiara sighed hopelessly, feeling her heart ache. She felt like a silly fool to be feeling this way about a man. She was being foolish just for coming out and attempting to find him like this. She crossed over a small creek, by way of stepping stones and wondered if she would ever find him.

  Then, something occurred to her as she drew close to the river. Maybe Nate didn’t want to be found. Maybe he ran off for a reason and wouldn’t come back. He could have left the flint and bow behind so that Kiara could fend for herself the rest of the way to Aleph. They were at the base of the mountains. Perhaps he thought that the reward wasn’t worth going the extra few miles for and he was going to let Kiara fend for herself through Mem’s Pass.

  She traveled a little ways north along the river, listening to the steady splashing of waves against the shore, trying to think of what to do now. It didn’t seem very gentlemanlike of Nate to leave her like this. But, then again, Nate wasn’t much of a gentleman. There were times though, that made her second guess that idea. Kiara was just beginning to think that maybe Nate was starting to warm up to her, that they may have become friends in due time. But, the longer she walked and searched along the river, the more convinced she became that Nate was long gone. If his intention was to leave her out here, he would have been miles away by now.

  Kiara wrapped the blanket around herself tighter and she felt her lungs convulse with the urge to sob. She would miss him dearly. But now, there was another matter on her mind that took priority. How would she get back?

  Maybe, she could go ahead and keep traveling like this along the river? The river’s current was bound to be weaker as she traveled closer to the mountain. Since she was wide awake, she might as well get as close to Mem’s Pass as she could.

  Then again, it probab
ly wouldn’t be smart to travel at night. Kiara had gotten herself in a mess already and she didn’t think it was advisable to keep going. She had to go back to the camp. With luck, Nate would be back there with some brilliant explanation for his absence that would make her feel even more stupid than she already felt.

  With that hope in her mind, she veered to the west and hurried back towards the direction she thought camp was. It didn’t take long before she realized that she didn’t recognize this trail and that it was curving back towards the mountains. She knew that she had gone too far north to be near the camp, so going closer to the mountains wouldn’t get her anywhere. She needed to go farther south, but the path looked like it wasn’t going to curve back in her desired direction anytime soon.

  Eventually, Kiara stopped on the trail and made the decision to cut off her route to go back west through the thicket. She would come to regret it. The vines and bushes were so tightly knitted together in this unmarked jungle that she had trouble moving at a steady pace at all. Her blanket and clothes were constantly getting caught on some thorn bushes or grabbed by curving branches. A few times, she almost tripped over tree roots that hid themselves cleverly along the ground.

  Finally, when coming to a small break in the trees, she realized that she was utterly lost. She grunted in irritation and looked up towards the moon. She’d been wandering around in this blasted wood for another hour. Kiara felt like bursting into tears. She wished she’d never left camp. She wished she wasn’t even out here in this accursed forest.

  Kiara took a deep breath and looked around her, trying to see any sign of a clearing or another path. Not seeing anything, she thought it safer just to stand there.

  “Nate! Nate, where are you?!” she shouted as loud as she could. Her voice echoed off into the abyss, but there was no other reply. Kiara shouted out louder.

  “Nate! Where are you?! Please answer me?!”