Believe in Me

by E. L. Todd

  She held my gaze and the emotion returned. “What if I proved to you—”

  “We’re done.” I didn’t want to hear her beg. “I’m sorry.”

  She looked down at her hands, clearly at a loss of words.

  Arms moved around my neck and down my chest. Then Lexie’s lips were on my neck, kissing me gently. I didn’t push her off because it was probably the best way to get rid of Beatrice, as mean as it was. “I missed you.” She moved into my lap and continued to kiss me.

  Beatrice’s eyes watered further then she walked away, heading straight for the bathroom.

  I thought I would feel good about this moment. I thought rejecting Beatrice would give me closure but it didn’t. All I felt was pity. She pushed away a man who truly loved her and now she couldn’t get him back. I wasn’t even the same person anymore.

  Lexie stopped kissing me when she was gone. “You okay?”

  “Yeah, I’m fine.” I didn’t meet her gaze.

  “What did she want?”

  “Small talk and she wanted to get coffee tomorrow.”

  “And what did you say?” she asked.

  “No.”

  “Well, she probably won’t bother you again at this point.”

  “Yeah…probably.” I moved her off of my lap and stood up. “Ready to go?”

  “Yes, I’m ready to get fucked in the back of your car.”

  I took her hand and guided her out. “Good. Because I’m going to stick it to you good.”

  ***

  I walked Lexie inside her apartment and she immediately kicked off her shoes. “Man, those were killing my feet.”

  “Foot massage?” I asked.

  “No, it’s okay.”

  I looked at my watch. It was two in the morning. I was exhausted and didn’t want to drive home then head to my apartment. I took off my jacket then laid it on the back of the couch.

  “What are you doing?” she demanded.

  I froze as I unbuttoned my shirt. “Taking these clothes off…”

  “You aren’t sleeping here.” She said it coldly. Our affectionate atmosphere was gone.

  “Why not…?”

  “I don’t do sleepovers,” she said. “I said that a hundred times now.”

  I sighed. “Lexie, I’m exhausted. Can I at least sleep on your couch? Is it that big of a deal?”

  Indecision was in her eyes. “Sleeping is more intimate than sex. It’s a scientific fact.”

  “Even so, we both understand what this relationship is. You really think I’m going to sleep with you and fall in love? If I haven’t fallen in love with you by now I’m never going to. Lexie, you need to chill out.”

  Her body relaxed and she seemed calmer.

  “Now, can I crash here?” I peeled off my shirt and tossed it aside.

  “Yeah, I guess.”

  “Geez…” I headed to her bedroom then stripped off my slacks. Then I got into her soft bed and pulled the covers up. I immediately closed my eyes because I was so tired.

  She came in a moment later then undressed and got ready for bed. She brushed her teeth then put on her pajamas. Then she lay beside me and turned off the light. “No cuddling. You stay over there and I stay over here.”

  “Gotcha.” I was already half asleep.

  She stopped stirring and stayed still on her side.

  ***

  I woke up in the middle of the night with the urge to pee. I drank a lot that night and it didn’t surprise me I had a full bladder. But when my eyes opened, I realized Lexie was on me.

  I was still on my side of the bed but now she was too. Her arm was hooked around my waist and her head rested on my chest. Her leg was pressed between mine and she was tangled up with me.

  So much for not snuggling. I smirked as I stared at her.

  Then I gently removed myself without waking her then rolled her back to her side, knowing she would freak out if she woke up to us cuddling. After I went to the bathroom and relieved myself, I returned to the bed.

  And like a magnet, she was on me again. She moved to my side of the bed and wrapped her body around me. Her arms hooked around my waist and her hair cascaded over my chest.

  I stared at her and tried not to laugh. Then I embraced it and held her close to me. Sleeping with her was more comfortable anyway. I moved her onto my chest then rested one hand deep inside her hair. The other lay on the small of her back. She released a deep sigh, full of contentment.

  Then I went back to sleep.

  ***

  I was jolted awake as Lexie jumped off me and fell onto the floor, becoming tangled in the sheets and forming a cocoon she couldn’t get out of.

  I sat up and squinted my eyes as the afternoon sun pierced them. I ran my fingers through my hair while I watched her try to kick her way to freedom.

  “God fucking dammit.” She tried to pull the sheets off her legs but they were wrapped around her too tightly.

  I watched her passively. “Need a hand?”

  She growled and wouldn’t look at me.

  I released a loud yawn and stretched my arms before I moved to the floor and helped her get out of the mess she made. I loosened the soft sheets then released her. “There you go.”

  She jumped to her feet and put her hands on her hips, giving me a menacing glare. “I said no cuddling! I said you needed to stay on your side of the bed but you didn’t listen to me!”

  I tried not to laugh. “Uh, Lexie…you were the one who kept cuddling with me.”

  “You’re such a liar.”

  “I’m really not,” I said. “I woke up in the middle of the night to pee and you were all over me. So I pushed you off, went to the bathroom, and then when I came back, you immediately crawled on top of me. I didn’t bother pushing you off again so I just let you stay there.”

  Her anger vanished, replaced by embarrassment.

  “It’s really not a big deal. You’re lighter than air anyway.”

  She ran her fingers through her hair, clearly flustered. “I’m sorry. I—”

  “It’s okay,” I said immediately. “I didn’t mind. I liked cuddling with you. It didn’t bother me.”

  She crossed her arms over her chest and looked out the window.

  “What’s the big deal, Lexie? We are both mature adults. If we sleep together, why can’t we go to sleep together once in a while? I don’t mind the cuddling and you clearly don’t either.”

  “It’s just…dangerous.” She wouldn’t look at me.

  “Dangerous how?” I asked. “How many times do I have to tell you I’m never going to want something serious? You can calm down. I’m not going to wake up one morning and tell you I can’t live without you. Just relax.”

  “That’s not what I’m afraid of…” She rubbed her hands up and down her arms like she was cold.

  What did that mean? “Then what are you scared of?”

  She shook her head slightly. “Nevermind. I’m going to shower.” She walked into her bathroom and shut the door.

  I thought I had a better understanding of women after my relationship with Beatrice, but in actuality, I understood them even less.

  Chapter Seven

  Clementine

  I carried a box into the house then set it on the counter. The place was cluttered with my belongings from my old apartment. Ward hired movers to move everything for me, but he and I helped out.

  I opened the box full of silverware and started to put everything away.

  Ward came in a moment later with a box full of pots and pans. “You have a lot of stuff, darling.” He set it on the counter carefully but the pans still made a clashing noise.

  I didn’t like it when he called me that. It reminded me of our old relationship, which made me sad. “Call me Clemy.”

  He turned my way with a sad look on his face. Then he returned his attention to the box and started unpacking everything.

  The movers came downstairs, looking sweaty and exhausted. “That’s everything, man.”

  “Great.�
�� Ward pulled his wallet out then tipped them. “Thanks for the help.”

  “Of course,” the main guy said. Then they walked out and drove their track away.

  Ward wore an old gray t-shirt and running shorts. His legs were thick and strong and his shoulders were more powerful than they used to be. I noticed it when he wasn’t wearing a suit. He’d clearly been working out more often.

  “What?”

  I didn’t realize Ward was staring at me. “Nothing.”

  “Then why are you staring at me?” he asked.

  “I just…” I couldn’t find something to say. Checking you out? “Thank you for hiring the movers.”

  “Of course,” he said. “We couldn’t handle this alone. And I didn’t want you to carry anything anyway.”

  I unpacked the plates and placed them in cabinets. “So, do you have any names in mind?” Ward and I were getting more comfortable around each other. It wasn’t so awkward. And he didn’t bring up our relationship again. It seemed like he finally let that go.

  “Actually, yes,” he said. “For a boy, I was thinking about Brett.”

  I nodded. “That’s nice.”

  “You like it?”

  “Yeah. What about a girl?”

  “Riley.”

  “I like that one too.”

  “Do you have any?” he asked.

  “No, not yet.”

  “I’ve been thinking about it a lot,” he said. “I’ll probably come up with more. Then we can vote.”

  “Yeah.” I closed the cabinet then grabbed the glasses out of the box. “Have you told your parents?”

  “No. I wanted to tell them in person—with you.”

  “Well, I can’t fly during my last trimester.”

  “I know,” he said. “We’ll have to do it soon. You’re willing to fly out there?” He seemed hesitant, like I might say no.

  “Of course,” I said. “They’re going to be grandparents to my child.”

  A slight smile formed on his lips. “Good. I know they’ll be really excited.”

  “I doubt Willow will be…”

  He chuckled. “Don’t worry about her. I’ll handle her.”

  She didn’t seem like a woman who could be easily handled.

  “So, dinner tonight with your family?” he asked.

  “Yeah.”

  “How do you think they’ll react?” he asked.

  “They’ll be shocked but I know they’ll be happy. Don’t worry about it.”

  He still seemed nervous.

  “It’ll be fine.”

  “I just don’t want your dad to think I’m a coward.”

  “He won’t,” I said. “Cayson will vouch for you. And my dad trusts everything he says because he’s his golden boy.”

  “I guess that’s true.” He hung the pans from underneath the microwave then gathered the empty cardboard boxes. “This place is already a home.”

  “Yeah.” I released a happy sigh. “It’s so beautiful. I love it.”

  He smiled at me. “I’m glad.” He stared at me for a moment before he pulled his gaze away. “Do you want to know the sex of the baby now or wait until they’re born?”

  “I don’t know. What do you prefer?”

  “I think I want to know now,” he said. “I want to decorate the room in the right colors. Plus, I want to get all the clothes ready. It’ll be easier to do that now rather than wait until they arrive.”

  “That makes sense.”

  He broke down the boxes then picked them up. “I’m going to drop these in the dumpster. I’ll be right back.”

  “Okay.”

  When we walked out, I listened to the silence. Soon, there would be the sound of a crying baby and laughter. I wouldn’t be the only member of this house. I would have a family. Ward wouldn’t be living with me but he would be just as involved. I was so grateful to have his support. He’d only known the truth for a few days and he already made this so much easier on me.

  He returned to the house then snaked a key out of his pocket. “I forgot to give you the other key. I’ll leave it here with the papers.” He left it on the counter then checked his watch. “I should probably shower before dinner.”

  I stared at the key on the counter then grabbed it. “I want you to have it.” I handed it back to him.

  He stared at it with a raised eyebrow but didn’t take it. “Why?”

  “I want you to feel welcome here. If you need to come by, use it.”

  “I wouldn’t invade your privacy, Clementine.”

  “Hey, we’re a team,” I said. “I wouldn’t give this to you if I felt uncomfortable. Besides, you bought the damn place.” I gave him a smile.

  He chuckled. “I guess I did.” He took it back then put it on his key ring. “Thank you. I appreciate the gesture.”

  “And I appreciate the house.”

  He stepped back and headed toward the door. “I’ll pick you up in a few hours.”

  “Okay. See you then.”

  “You can handle the rest of the stuff?” he asked as he held the door open.

  “I’m pregnant, not disabled.”

  “I know,” he said with a chuckle. “But pregnant women should never do anything strenuous.”

  “I got it,” I said. “But thanks.”

  “Okay. See you soon.” He walked out and locked the door with his key.

  I didn’t know what possessed me to offer him the other key to my house but it felt right. Arsen couldn’t get to his child because Lydia was a psycho. I wanted Ward to feel comfortable, that even though our child would live with me he could be as involved as he wanted to be. And I wanted our child to see that we loved each other—even if we weren’t together.

  ***

  We got to the restaurant first then took our seats.

  Ward wasn’t himself, cool and suave. His leg shook under the table and he kept glancing at his watch without actually looking at the time. The chair could barely contain him because he wouldn’t stop moving.

  “Don’t be nervous,” I said gently.

  “I respect your father as a friend and colleague. I really want this night to go well.”

  “It will.” I moved my hand to his and patted it.

  “I can’t even imagine what it was like for you to tell them you were pregnant to begin with.”

  “Terrifying,” I said with a laugh. “But I got it over with and everything was fine. And that was way worse than this so you can handle it.”

  Skye and Cayson arrived next. When she saw Ward sitting beside me she released a quiet scream. “You guys are back together! I knew it.” She turned to Cayson. “I told you we needed to meddle. This is so wonderful.” She sat next to me and beamed like her cheeks were permanently stuck that way.

  “We aren’t back together,” I said gently.

  Her face fell. “Why? Then what is he doing here…?”

  “I’ll explain when my parents get here,” I said.

  Skye looked like she wouldn’t be able to wait that long.

  Cayson acknowledged Ward. “Hey, how’s it going?”

  “Well,” Ward said. “You?”

  “Good. How’s the house?” he asked.

  “We got all of Clementine’s things inside,” he said. “Man, she has a lot of stuff.”

  Cayson laughed. “Mostly shoes, huh?”

  “I can tell you’ve helped her move before,” Ward said.

  “Yep,” Cayson said. “When she first moved to the city.”

  I was grateful Ward and my brother were getting along. It made me happy to see them actually like each other. I wanted my baby to see that when it arrived.

  My parents came in next, and judging the surprised looks on their faces, they were surprised Ward was there. But they held back their curiosity and greeted us before they sat across from us. Dad was directly across from Ward. I knew Ward must be a little nervous.

  “So, what’s new?” Mom asked cheerfully. “You know what the sex of the baby is?”

  “Not yet,�
� I said. “I’ll find out soon.”

  “I hope it’s a girl,” Mom said. “I can dress her up in so many cute things.”

  “I don’t care what it is,” Dad said. “I’m just happy to be a grandpa.”

  “I hope its a boy,” Cayson said. “So I can teach him to play laser tag.”

  “You can teach a girl too,” Skye said.

  “I guess,” Cayson said but it was clear he didn’t agree with that.

  I didn’t want to spring the news on them so suddenly so we ordered and got the drinks going.

  “So, Ward,” Dad said. “What brings you here?”

  “Clementine invited me.” I knew he was waiting for me to take the lead because I knew my parents better than he did.

  “Oh.” Dad nodded, still confused why he was there. They’d never seen me with Ward. They probably didn’t even know that I knew him.

  “Actually, there’s something Ward and I want to tell you,” I said.

  Mom’s eyes were large, like she couldn’t wait to hear what I might say.

  Just do it. Rip the bandage off. “Ward is actually the father of my baby.”

  Mom dropped her fork and it clattered on the table.

  Skye screamed. “Yes!”

  Cayson didn’t react at all. He was too shocked.

  My dad didn’t look happy. In fact, he looked angry. “You bail on her for three months before you finally get your act together?” Dad hardly got mad, but when he did he was frightening.

  “No, let me explain first,” I said. “It’s not what it seems like.”

  “You better explain then.” He shot Ward a threatening look. “Because I’m about to rip this guy to pieces and make sure he’s out of a job.”

  Dad had never been so hateful. “Ward and I dated for a year. We were in love and very happy.”

  “A year?” Mom asked incredulously. “And you never mentioned it?” She didn’t like being left in the dark.

  “I wanted to keep it a secret because I knew Ward and I would never last,” I said. “He lives in London and I live here. We broke up a while ago, and somehow, I got pregnant.”

  “And now that you’re broken up he wants nothing to do with the baby?” Dad asked incredulously.

  “Let me finish!” I told him to shut up with just my eyes.

  Dad backed off.