Voices in the Dark

by Jaeza Rayleigh

  Now, though, it was time to go back in. After luncheon she had an escape to plan. That thought improved her mood as well.

  ~o~

  "I have managed to eat a good portion of every meal since we last spoke and I do feel better," Miss de Bourgh told Lizzy that afternoon.

  "I am glad it is helping. We must build up your strength."

  "If I am going to leave, I must not expose the improvement to my health too soon," Miss de Bourgh said with a worried look.

  "Are you concerned someone might tell your mother?"

  "I know someone will tell her, or tell Mrs. Porter, which is nearly the same thing. If mother so much as suspects that I want to leave, she will call for the surgeon to bleed me – for my health, of course."

  Miss de Bourgh looked annoyed; an expression Lizzy had not previously seen on the young woman's face. The shadows started to shift. Quickly Miss de Bourgh calmed herself and the danger was averted.

  "Then we must be sure she does not find out. It seems we both suspect Betty as an informant. Is Clara to be trusted?" Lizzy asked.

  "I think Clara is fond of me and she would not actively cause trouble for me so long as no trouble will come to her from my mother. I do not feel I can confide in her as she might unwittingly betray me."

  "We will have to stay in this room then as we help you build your strength. Tell me about your tonic. Do you know what it contains?"

  "I think there is a touch of laudanum in it, although usually only enough to slightly dull the pain. The proportion depends on who has prepared it for me. It also contains valerian, hops and chamomile as well as honey. There may be other ingredients I am not aware of. It is intended to keep me calm and allow me to rest."

  "How often do you take it?"

  "At least three times a day and more if I am in great pain. The day we met my whole body ached fiercely and I sometimes feel like little jolts of lightning are flowing through my limbs."

  "I am no physician, but I do know that when I am in bed for too long, I begin to ache all over as well. Are you able to walk at all?" Lizzy asked.

  "I can. Usually I feel too lethargic to leave my room. I tend to spend my days reading or dozing."

  "I think the ingredients in your tonic are part of what makes you tired all the time and possibly why you do not feel hungry. Without eating enough you do not have energy to take exercise which leaves you in pain, so you take more tonic."

  "I think I understand what you are suggesting. In addition to eating what is sent up for me I need to move around more and take less of the tonic."

  "That is exactly what I am suggesting. In addition you need to do it in a way that does not excite suspicion."

  "I liked that story very well, Miss Bennet," said Miss de Bourgh in a little louder tone than they had been using. Lizzy was not surprised when she added, "What is it, Betty?"

  "Your mother has summoned Miss Bennet, Miss."

  "Very well, I was about to release her anyway. Thank you for entertaining me with the stories of your sisters, Miss Bennet."

  Lizzy stood and curtsied. "It was my pleasure, Miss de Bourgh."

  As she headed to the drawing room Lizzy wondered if anyone had seen her leave the kitchen garden. She could not think of another reason for a second summons that day. She hoped she would not be forbidden the opportunity to go outside again. She had a promise to keep to the lonely ghost.

  Lady Catherine left Lizzy to sit in silence for nearly an hour. After Lizzy curtsied and took her seat the older woman opened a book and began to read.

  "My daughter appears to enjoy your company, Miss Bennet," she finally said after inserting her marker and putting down the book. Lizzy remained silent as she had not been asked a direct question. Lady Catherine nodded slightly and asked, "What do you speak of when you are with her?"

  Lizzy decided it would not hurt to allow a slight bit of flattery to color her response. "Miss de Bourgh is curious about life on a small estate. Knowing my family's consequence is so far below your own she thought it might be of interest to hear the ways of our household. She also wondered about life with so many sisters. I have told her stories of our nursery days to cheer her."

  "Why does she insist on speaking with you alone, then?"

  "She does not want my attention distracted from her as it might be if others were in the room."

  Lizzy hoped she had struck the correct note in her response. It appeared so as Lady Catherine gave that slight earbob-sparkling nod. They both sat in silence for some time.

  Suddenly Lady Catherine spoke again, "Did you enjoy your visit to the gardens?"

  Lizzy willed herself to display no disquiet as she answered, "Very much. I have never seen a better tended vegetable garden nor one with such a fine variety of edible plants."

  Lady Catherine's voice took on an added hint of pride as she answered, "Of course you have not. Your family's status was not high enough to give you access to a garden as fine as mine."

  Lizzy nodded in silent agreement and waited. After several long minutes Lady Catherine gave a languid wave of the hand as she said, "You are dismissed."

  After making her curtsy, Lizzy left, keeping her thoughts on breathing evenly. Once in the corridor she sighed slightly in relief. Hopefully Lady Catherine's suspicions had been allayed, at least for now.

  ~o~

  The second visit with the ghost was far more amusing than the first. They spoke of singing and ended up discussing the merits of several obscure ballads Lizzy had learned at the suggestion of her Aunt Gardiner. Some the ghost already knew of and some he did not. The discussion was lively as each put forth their opinions.

  Lizzy found the ghost an able debater. From discussions with her father she knew how to support her points with skill. To her joy, the ghost treated her views and arguments with respect even when he disagreed. Most men would counter with snide comments about the limited intelligence of women when contradicted. Even her father tended to pout and change the subject when it seemed her view was better supported than his own. She wondered if the ghost would have been so generous if he were standing alive in front of her. Thinking about the possibility gave her much amusement.

  ~o~

  Her next visit with Miss de Bourgh gave Lizzy equal pleasure. After Miss de Bourgh heard of the interview with Lady Catherine, they agreed to start each visit with a few quick stories of life in Meryton so she would have ready answers if her mother questioned her about the conversations.

  "I enjoy your stories anyway," she told Lizzy. "I was also wondering if we might call each other by our given names when we are talking privately. I am Anne. My mother named me after he younger sister, but she told me once that she regretted the decision as I am as sickly as my aunt was."

  "I am Elizabeth, but I prefer to go by Lizzy. I am also named after an aunt, in my case a great-aunt on my father's side."

  "Thank you, Lizzy. Your presence here is making such a difference. I look forward to each of our visits and you give me hope I might soon be able to leave."

  "Are you feeling better then?" Lizzy asked.

  "Yes, I am, although I pretend that I am not. When I am alone, I have been walking, well pacing really, and I can already go farther than I could a few days ago. You were correct that I hurt less when I get up and move around. I am also figuring out ways to make it seem like I am drinking all my tonic without really drinking it. Before they realize I am awake I hide an empty pitcher between the top of the mattress and the wall then cover it with my pillows. I can pour the tonic there and then empty it in the necessary when they think I am asleep."

  "Good thinking, Anne. I was worried they might force you to take the tonic or add more laudanum to it."

  "I had not thought of that, but it seems like something my mother would order. When do you think we can escape?" Anne asked eagerly.

  "First we need a good plan. We cannot just leave and hope for the best. We need to know where we are going, how to get there and how we will support ourselves after we arrive." Lizzy he
sitated then added, "Assuming you want me to stay with you after we leave here."

  "Of course, I do, Lizzy. I was hoping you would. I do not think I can make it without you."

  Lizzy sighed with relief. "I am glad. Now do you have any idea where we should go? The only places I know of will not work."

  "I think we should go to the de Bourgh townhouse in London. It will give us a place to stay while we contact my cousin so he will help me access my spending money. We can take my phaeton to get there. It may not be an ideal way to travel the long distance, but it is safer than going post."

  "Would the townhouse be safe? I would think your mother would look for us there."

  She does not go to London anymore. In fact, I do not think she has gone any farther than Hunsford in the last five years. I think she may be as tied to this house as the shadows are. Besides, it would only take a little while to get the money we need and then we can move on to someplace she has no control. I am sure my cousin can suggest a location."

  "I have some money to start us off," Lizzy volunteered. "If the townhouse does not seem safe or if we are turned away it will be enough for lodging and food for a few weeks. I usually saved my allowance at home and I brought everything I had saved with me. I have received my first quarter salary here as well, although it is very little, less even than the scullery maid received at Longbourn. We will have to travel light but if you have anything you might be willing to sell if we need more funds you should bring it. We will only be able to take what we can carry down to the stables ourselves and we will have to sneak it out."

  "I had not thought of that. I wonder if there is any place outside where we could hide a trunk and then you could take things down little by little to fill it."

  "I may know of one place, but it is not under cover. If we have rain it might cause a problem. I am also not completely sure the trunk would remain undisturbed there."

  "Keep your eyes open for any place that might work. If not, we will share a small trunk between us that we can carry down together. We can always buy more clothing or other articles after we are settled, and I have my allowance."

  "Are you sure your cousin can help?"

  "I am of age and the money is mine. I just need him to take me to the bank and make sure I can access my account. He will help. He may not wish to marry me just as I do not wish to marry him, but he is a good man and he will look after our well-being. I will also bring any valuables I can. Do you know how to sell them?"

  "No, but as long as I am not asking for funds or a place to live, I think my uncle might help in that regard."

  "Why would he not help you otherwise?"

  "He has. He sold several items that were not included in the entail and purchased a place for us to live and put the rest away to help pay for our expenses. Since there would be a place for me if my mother had not refused to let me live there, he will not support me with his own funds, and I do not really blame him. I will also have a very small regular income from the interest of the dowry he set up for me."

  "We have a beginning. I will try to become stronger while you look for the best way for us to leave. For now I think I should let you go so they do not suspect our plots. I am glad you are my friend, Lizzy."

  "I am glad to have you as a friend as well, Anne. Send for me in a few days and we will compare notes."

  Lizzy stood and curtsied, finishing the charade by loudly saying, "Thank you, Miss de Bourgh." She winked at Anne and then left the room, knowing Betty had been trying to listen in. She nodded to both Betty and Clara as she passed through the drawing room. With luck they would suspect nothing.

  Lizzy knew things could go terribly wrong for both of them if Lady Catherine discovered she and Anne intended to leave. Her friend's mother was an intelligent woman and had the advantage of her houseful of spies. Of course, that made the thought of getting the better of her all the more enticing. Lizzy was willing to take the risk, not only of Lady Catherine's displeasure but also of an uncertain future outside of Rosings Park. As the old saying went, nothing ventured, nothing gained. Lizzy was willing to see if fortune truly favored the bold.

  Chapter 11: Plans

  Even more amusing than the debate about songs were the two conversations Lizzy and the ghost had about books. It seemed the ghost had been as widely read as Lizzy herself. He certainly seemed more cheerful, which pleased her as well. Their conversations could have continued for hours if Lizzy had not been worried about staying out too long.

  Unfortunately, the escape preparations were not moving along as well as she had hoped. After consideration Lizzy could see that bringing a trunk through the hedge would destroy the secrecy of the spot, assuming she could take a trunk outside undetected anyway. They would have to travel light. That meant leaving her books behind, but Lizzy realized they were a small price to pay for freedom from this household. She had read them all so many times she would not really be leaving them behind anyway. Lizzy chuckled at the thought she would carry the ghosts of the books in her head while their bodies remained in her room.

  Without the books, her trunk would be light enough to carry by herself if she had to. In fact, it would be best if she could take it down to Anne's room by herself early on the day that they planned to leave so Anne would have the chance to pack her own belongings. They thought the best day would be one when the parson was scheduled to visit. They could leave while he was there to distract Lady Catherine.

  Lizzy had returned to her habit of walking inside the house again in order to find the routes on which they would be least likely to encounter any of the servants. After some consideration she realized the best choice would be to go right down the main stairs and out the front door. Their biggest danger from that route would be meeting Mrs. Porter on the way. Before they could leave Anne's room, they would need to get Clara and Betty out of the way as well.

  If they could make it out of the house, the next challenge would be to get the ponies hitched up to the phaeton. Lizzy had seen the groom hitch the horses up to her father's carriage often enough that she thought she could manage so long as the ponies cooperated. The main problem was the time it would take. The longer they stayed in one place the more likely someone would interfere. Lizzy wished the stable were not off-limits to her. It would have been nice to take a look around and locate everything she would need for when the time came.

  Anne could barely contain her excitement. Pretending to still be a complete invalid was becoming most difficult for her. Lizzy wondered that anyone believed it. Anne's color was better, she looked less gaunt and anyone who could see the shadows would know they no longer hung so thickly around her bed. Anne was still ill, there was no doubt about that, but she was nowhere near ill enough to be confined constantly to her bed.

  "Tell me about London, Lizzy," she asked as they settled in for another visit. "What sights did you see when you visited your uncle?"

  "You must remember that my uncle is a tradesman. He lives near his warehouse in a pleasant but unfashionable part of town. We tend to shop near his home, not on Bond Street, and we do not attend many events even among his colleagues."

  "Still it must be fun to visit and see all the people. It does not matter if they are fashionable or not. Of course, one of the reasons my mother always disliked the townhouse is the location. It is in a respectable neighborhood but not a highly fashionable one. She would tell my father the house was beneath the dignity of the daughter of an earl. He would always answer that it was perfectly sufficient for the wife of a baronet. He took me there once when I was eight although my mother refused to go along. I remember sitting by the nursery window watching all the people and carriages in the street and wondering about where they came from and what they were doing. Father took me to the park and let me feed the ducks." Anne smiled happily at the memory.

  "You seem to have had your own adventures in London," Lizzy told her. "That does remind me we will need the address so we can find the townhouse once we get there. I am used to having a coachma
n to find the way to wherever I am going. For our journey I am concerned at the possible danger to two young women traveling alone in an open conveyance in an unknown neighborhood. I do not see what other choice we have, though."

  "Do you know how to get to your uncle's house? Perhaps he would lend us a servant just long enough to get us to the townhouse? I can give you the address before we leave."

  Lizzy thought the idea over. "Yes," she said slowly, "that might work. We would still be exposed and there is danger. I do know the way and I expect he would help as long as it does not require him to commit to any support of me. I think we will have to chance asking him. You know what we are planning is quite insane?" she finished with a wry smile.

  "It is better than remaining forever a prisoner here," Anne replied. "We will bluff our way through."

  "That we shall. Now, let me tell you about the most wonderful place I have ever been – Hatchards bookstore."

  "Oh, please. My cousin, Georgiana, told me in a letter once that it was her brother's favorite place to shop. I have never been in a bookstore."

  Lizzy launched into a tale of her most recent visit, describing the shop front before moving inside and detailing the various sections of the store. As she told of some of the books she had looked at and wished to buy, Lizzy thought of her discussions with the ghost. She wondered if he had ever been to Hatchards.

  ~o~

  At their next discussion Anne brought up the subject of her cousin, Georgiana again. Despite a seven-year difference in their ages the two carried on a frequent correspondence and were fond of one another. Georgiana did not visit out of fear of Lady Catherine, although Anne knew that from Georgiana's brother, Fitzwilliam Darcy, not from letters. Both Anne and Georgiana knew that anything they wrote was probably read by Lady Catherine or Mrs. Porter before making it into the intended hands.

  “I am worried about Georgiana,” Anne told Lizzy. “We usually write twice a month, yet I have not heard from her since before Easter. William carried a letter from her when he came for his annual visit, but there have been no letters since. She knows not to write anything to which my mother might object.”