Difficult Husbands

by Mary de Laszlo

  ‘I’ve explained but I’ll go through it again, more slowly,’ Beth interrupted him, turning to Lorna with a patient smile as if she was about to explain something of the utmost simplicity to an idiot.

  ‘I know exactly what it would entail,’ Lorna said wearily. ‘I happen to have been in a Christmas advertisement, though it was done in the summer, months before Christmas, and I know that Ravenscourt will not do.’

  ‘My dear, are you an actress? Someone we ought to know?’ Sonia exclaimed as if Lorna might be in line for an Oscar.

  Before she could answer, Nathan said, ‘I prefer to do my brochures at Christmas time, this one will be for next Christmas. We have all the food and the shots taken outside – and I’d like a few of those – look better in the proper season. The house may not do but please could we at least see it?’ His voice dropped an octave, soft and rich, tugging at her heart in the most annoying way. She was a fool; just because she so craved the kindness of a nice man she was going to lie down and roll over and become his slave.

  Beth began again to boast about how she could transform anywhere into a magical setting, however dank. Lorna wondered why these exceptional skills could not turn this barn into the cosy, country house setting they envisaged.

  Nathan came over to her and said quietly, ‘Look Lorna, I know it’s a dreadful imposition, especially as it seems you’ve only recently inherited it but if it’s at all possible I’d love to see it. I’m sorry I can’t pay you, I’ve got cash flow problems just now, but I’d give you a whole ham.’ He smiled, his eyes tender as he regarded her. Her heart lifted and for a moment she felt close to him as if they were the only two people in the barn.

  ‘All right … you can come and see it, but don’t expect too much,’ she said and feeling hemmed in by all the others congratulating her and throwing out their ideas as if her consent had given them carte blanche for any other crazy plans, she slipped away out of the barn for a moment of peace to think it through.

  A wind had got up, whipping round her like a knife, but it was a relief to get out in the fresh air away from the warm, almost suffocating smell of the cooking hams and chutneys. She pounded over grass, which was like a green carpet thrown over the ridges of the roots of the tress that lined it. Ahead she saw a copse of fir trees and she went towards it, wanting to escape all this and be alone to digest the bizarre events Ravenscourt had suddenly spawned.

  9

  Divided Loyalties

  Perhaps she had been too bossy. Gloria felt a twinge of guilt but really, someone had to take charge and it was hardly poor Lorna’s fault that she was so indecisive at the moment, valiantly struggling to adapt to her new life of being single again. Of their three husbands she’d have thought Stephen was the most reliable, the one least likely to do a runner on his family, but then, did you ever really know anyone? Perhaps he’d been so used to life going his way, and the kudos of having a top job in his company that suddenly, being made redundant at an age when finding another well-paid job was difficult had pushed him off the rails.

  Adrian had always drunk too much, although what was too much? There had always been a good selection of bottles on show whenever she’d visited him in the legal firm where he worked – very tempting for someone with a taste for it. The consumption of alcohol had become a sort of flag of honour these days with people boasting that they’d been legless, listing the amount they’d drunk as if it were something to be proud of. In fact, in some circles, if someone didn’t drink they were thought of as wimps, ‘not one of the team’. She’d heard of people being turned down for jobs or missing promotion because they didn’t join in these drinking sessions. This strange ‘bonding’ seemingly could only take place if everyone was drunk.

  Ravenscourt was now the main topic of their conversation as they all stood round in the barn, discussing whether or not it would do as a backdrop for Nathan’s brochure. Beth dominated the discussion with her ideas and Gloria could see that this irritated Lorna. There was a sort of hunted look about her eyes and she was about to pitch in and stop it by saying they must be on their way when she saw Nathan talking intently to Lorna. After a moment, everyone looked their way and she saw Nathan smile, touch Lorna’s arm and thank her, and she felt relieved that she must have agreed to let him see the house. Everyone else realised it too, and began to throw about their ideas as if they were there already and had taken the house over. She moved to congratulate Lorna, when she saw her slip round the back of them and go outside. She was about to follow her when Nathan came up to her and said with relief, ‘She’s agreed I can see the house, I understand her reluctance, as it was rather thrown at her and I feel bad at jumping at it, but after being let down with the one we were going to use, I felt quite desperate to find somewhere else in time, while we have all the food and stuff. You haven’t seen the house, yet, have you? So you’ve no idea if it will do or not?’

  ‘No, we’re on our way to see it now, we came to you first as you are the furthest away. Lorna wasn’t expecting to inherit it at all, so she’s still stunned by it, and faced with your request … well, she … none of us were expecting it and also she …’ She paused, wondering if she should she tell him about Lorna’s predicament?

  ‘Go on … she what?’ Nathan questioned her.

  ‘She’s going through a very tough time. Her husband was ff’ed up by some shrink and has careered off with some visa-seeking nymphet.’

  His expression deepened with concern, ‘I’m sorry. If I’d known, I wouldn’t have burdened her with this.’ He glanced towards the barn door as if he would go after her and tell her not to worry, that he wouldn’t go to Ravenscourt after all.

  ‘I’m sure she’ll be fine about you seeing it. It might not be right for your posh brochure at all,’ she laughed.

  He smiled and touched her shoulder and it sent a little frisson of desire down her body.

  He said, ’I’ll go and find her, having gone through all that, it’s hardly surprising she’s reluctant to let us loose there.’

  Beth, overhearing the tail end of his remark, said rather scathingly, ‘Lorna changed her mind?’ Her face was creased with impatience. ‘Where is she? I’ll explain again exactly what we want to do.’

  ‘Leave it Beth, I’ll go and talk to her.’ Nathan moved towards the door.

  Lorna was quite subdued today. Stephen’s departure had shattered her and Gloria knew she was determined to pick up a new life, though the pain of losing the old one could creep up and pull you down when you were least expecting it, as she knew only too well with Adrian. She should have held her tongue and not started this fiasco.

  ‘Don’t worry, I’ll deal with it,’ she smiled, laying her hand on Nathan’s arm, resisting an urge to stroke him, her feelings torn between doing right by Lorna and getting Nathan what he wanted and gaining his gratitude.

  She left the barn, looking round for Lorna and saw her just about to disappear into the clump of trees in the corner of the lawn. She called to her to wait and ran across the lawn, the wet earth sticking to her thin, leather boots. Lorna waited for her, but she was scowling.

  ‘Oh, Glory, why did you come out with it without asking me first? I’m sorry for Nathan losing the house he was going to use and I don’t mind him seeing it but it’s the others. Well, Beth, really, she’s so forceful and I can’t bear it if she and Sonia sneer over its sad decline. I thought we’d have a good time exploring it just the three of us, and now if they come, it will spoil it.’

  ‘I’m really sorry, Lorna but Nathan looked so fraught I couldn’t help myself. And the house can’t be that bad. Beth will transform it, or corners of it, so they can take their photographs.’

  ‘That’s what I’m afraid of, I don’t want it transformed.’

  ‘But remember our plan to house the boys there. If they make it Christmassy we’ll ask them to leave the decorations up, even add some food and we could pretend it was a hotel we are all staying in for Christmas and then somehow . . .’ She must convince her, she co
uldn’t bear to lose Justin, thinking of it tore at her heart. ‘We’ll find a way to persuade them to stay while we go home and have a peaceful time with our children.’

  ‘Not that idea again, Glory. It was a joke, a mad idea like we’d have thought up when we were children. It will never come off,’ Lorna said gently, almost laughing about it. ‘Remember they’ll have their mobiles and their cars with them.’

  ‘We’ll see,’ Gloria squeezed her arm, thinking it better to leave their plan out of it just now. ‘Let them come over later to see the house when we’ve had a bit of time there, just the three of us as we planned.’

  10

  First Impressions

  It didn’t take them long to get to Ravenscourt. They drove through the wrought iron gates. The fields either side of the drive had been rented out to a local farmer and some wind-blown sheep huddled into a shelter under the trees.

  Lorna was silent on the journey, anxiety ploughing through her. She wished they hadn’t gone to Mulberry Farm before seeing Ravenscourt, or better still, not gone there at all. She’d seen the palaver of a shoot, all those cameras and cables and people milling round and she didn’t want that for Ravenscourt. She felt sorry for Clara and wished she’d thought of her before she’d agreed to this. How would she feel having various strangers poking about the house, perhaps making derogatory remarks about the state of it? She knew that, although she had no cause to, Clara felt guilty that the house had fallen into such a sad state. Yet it was far beyond a good hovering and a flick of a duster.

  She’d wanted to make it clear that they couldn’t all come, that Nathan could slip in – on his own – for a few minutes. When he’d seen how bad it was, that would be the end of it and he would have to find somewhere else.

  She geared herself up to say this when she reached the barn but was infuriated when she heard Beth saying she’d go to the house, photograph it and show the pictures to Nathan later.

  She’d read too much into Nathan’s manner; his kindness had led her to imagine that he cared for her. She had quite lost sight of the fact that he had a company to run and needed a house, Ravenscourt, for his brochure. Emotions didn’t come into it, this was business, and she must learn from it. Why not try and get her cupcakes in on the act too?

  She was about to barge in and say there could be no photographs when Nathan broke away from the group and came to her. ‘Thank you so much, Lorna, for letting me come and see Ravenscourt. I feel I’ve rather pushed you into it, but it could just be perfect for my publicity shoot.’

  ‘You will be coming yourself, I hope.’ she said, her heart lifting, hoping he would understand her feelings for Fergus. She’d tried to explain them if he came.

  ‘Yes, I’ll be there.’ She felt relieved, and wanted to say, ‘Come on your own,’ but she did not, afraid it would sound unbusiness-like. Anyway, Sonia and Beth were already determinedly coming towards them.

  ‘Here we are,’ Lorna said, as Gloria pulled up in front of the house.

  ‘Wow, some house!’ Rosalind exclaimed in awe.

  Clara appeared out of the kitchen entrance to greet them, obviously impatient for their company. Lorna introduced them.

  ‘It’s quite grand,’ Gloria said. ‘Imagine sweeping up to that front door in some classy car. I suppose in the past a butler opened the door and a little maid came and unpacked your suitcase? Is that what happened when you arrived in the old days when there was staff, Lorna?’

  ‘We didn’t have a classy car. There were staff, but I can’t remember if my case was unpacked for me. The house was beautiful when I came as a child, almost magical, I used to think the passages led to secret rooms as it’s all so topsy turvy upstairs, especially the top floor. Funny little rooms tucked in here and there. Then gradually it grew more shabby, it is so sad to see how much it has deteriorated.’

  ‘So Stephen knows it?’ Gloria asked.

  ‘He came once or twice when the children were small. I brought them down for the day sometimes without him in the holidays. He may not remember it now. I hope not, I haven’t told him about it yet and don’t know what his reaction will be.’

  ‘It’s surely nothing to do with him now you are divorced,’ Gloria said firmly.

  ‘Must have been lovely in its heyday,’ Rosalind said, to change the subject. ‘Sad that no one can afford to live in these huge houses now. Except Russians and ‘slebs’ of course.’

  ‘Come in and have some coffee to warm you up.’ Clara led the way through the side door into the kitchen. Lorna, now seeing it through her friends’ eyes, thought how old-fashioned and drab it seemed with its tall pine cupboards and deep china sink. It appeared worse as they went round the rest of the house. The creeping plants that blocked the windows cloaked the rooms with an eerie, green hue. The hall was large and icy cold with a stone flagged floor. A brass chandelier, festooned in cobwebs and dull with age, hung from the ceiling.

  The drawing room seemed even bleaker, with a large water stain resembling a group of islands running down from the corner of the ceiling and over half the wall, bubbling up the faded wallpaper. Part of the moulding from the ceiling had crumbled and fallen like lumps of icing sugar onto the floor.

  Clara said apologetically, ‘I know it looks a mess, but it’s so hard to keep clean. There was so much to do in the rooms he used and looking after him. We used to have more help but…’

  ‘Of course you couldn’t keep up with it. It’s far too much for one person. These places need a fleet of staff.’ Gloria smiled at her. ‘It is lovely though. Well, it would be if it was all put back the way it was.’

  ‘It’s the damp,’ Rosalind shivered, ‘that’s what kills it. You need roaring fires and I must say the fireplaces are magnificent, so enormous and ornate they’d be shocking anywhere else with all those inlays of different coloured marble, but here in these huge rooms they look fantastic.’

  ‘Beth will be mad about those,’ Gloria said, then, seeing Lorna’s face, went on, ‘sorry love, I took over. But you must admit it is beautiful even if it does need a complete makeover.’

  ‘I just wanted to get used to it being mine before other people intrude with their ideas of what to do with it.’ Lorna said. Being here again and seeing the sad state of it wrung her heart. There was so much to be done. The task was too daunting to contemplate just now.

  She opened the door to the dining room, leading the way in. It was colder than being outside in the garden. There were hunting prints on the walls, and holly green velvet curtains held back by faded green tassels. Here and there Lorna noticed little bald patches where mice or moths had made a meal of them. It was warmer in the smaller rooms where Fergus had lived. His bedroom, with its French style double bed, was comfortably done up in duck egg blue and fawn. It opened into a modern, rather austere bathroom made more cheerful by a red carpet.

  ‘I made him buy that to brighten it up a bit and warm his feet too,’ Clara said. ‘He sat in here, his study.’ She opened another door into a good-sized room, the walls lined with reams of books on smart wooden shelves. A large mahogany desk stood near the window overlooking the garden and there were a couple of comfy chairs by the fire, but somehow the thought of the two of them, sitting forlornly there day after day, with no other visitors, was unbearable to Lorna. But Fergus had refused to let her come until his last breath and she must accept that.

  ‘He must have been very lonely?’ she said to Clara, hit with the reality of it.

  ‘He was lonely for the life he’d lost and all the people who’d died before him. He would talk of them for hours, of the war and his friends who’d been killed. He felt guilty sometimes that he hadn’t died with them. Whatever life they all lived after that war, it never left them, and at the end all his memories of it crowded back.’

  ‘And yet he lived such a glamorous life after that, though it seemed he could never settle down with one woman,’ Lorna reminded her.

  Rosalind shivered, clasped her arms round herself. ‘It is a sad house being so ne
glected; it will cost a fortune to restore it, Lorna. You know how these old houses are.’ She spoke from experience, having done up a wreck of a house herself. ‘You start on one thing and uncover a multitude of other things that need urgent attention. I’m sure he meant well, but being confined to these few rooms, he probably didn’t realise how much needed doing to the rest of it.’

  ‘I know, I’ll have to think what to do with it.’ Lorna sighed, knowing the answer but feeling as if she were letting the house down.

  Unconsciously Rosalind rubbed it in. ‘Poor house, but even as it is now, you can feel its character.’

  ‘Like an aging great beauty without make up,’ Gloria said. ‘Well, I don’t know about you all but I am freezing. We’d better go and have lunch and be back for Nathan.’

  Lorna explained to Clara about Nathan coming over later as he wanted to see if it was suitable for his photo shoot. She finished, ‘I’m sure it won’t do, he has very high standards and will not think it smart enough for his posh food.’

  ‘It won’t do for our other idea either,’ Rosalind laughed, ‘though I must say it is secluded enough.’

  ‘What was your other idea?’ Clara asked, as they scurried back into the comfort of the warm kitchen.

  ‘Oh, it’s mad.’ Lorna wished it hadn’t been mentioned, it sounded so crazy. ‘Just dumping our husbands here while we enjoyed a drama-free Christmas without them spoiling it for us . . . well, namely the children, as they have in past years.’