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Talon (Uncompromising #1)

Page 19

by Sybil Bartel


  “I thought that’s what we agreed on.”

  I glanced at her but she was studying the road in front of us. “We did, before.”

  “I still want the truth.”

  No change in her tone or body language, I couldn’t tell what she wanted. “I’m not unaffected,” I said honestly. “But when you’ve spent enough time in a shithole like Afghanistan and you see your brothers get blown to hell, you learn to compartmentalize. Tonight was fucked every which way I can name but in the end, I’m sitting in a car with you and you’re in one piece. For that, I’m fuckin’ grateful.”

  Her gaze dropped to her lap and her shoulders moved with a sharp inhale.

  “Siren, I know you want me to say I’m sorry for Randy but I’m not gonna. I’m sorry you’re hurtin’, I am, but whatever history you had with him doesn’t give him a pass for firin’ a fuckin’ twelve-gauge buckshot within five feet of your head.” My knuckles tightened on the steering wheel just thinking about it.

  “He wasn’t aiming for me,” she said softly.

  “Intent ain’t worth shit when reality interferes.”

  Her voice turned whisper quiet but her hands fisted in her lap. “He didn’t have to pull that trigger. I’m angry with him too.”

  That was a loaded statement I wasn’t ready to touch. “I can only imagine.”

  She turned back toward the window. “I’m not sure you can.”

  “Fair enough.” I let her have her distance as we drove down the deserted highway for a few miles. “You wanna talk ’bout it, I’m here. No judgment, I’ll listen.” It was the only thing I could think to offer her.

  “I don’t think you’re the person I should be talking to about him.”

  My shoulders tight, I shrugged like this whole conversation didn’t piss me the fuck off and make me feel fucking impotent all at the same time. “Sometimes you give up on the best choice and settle for the only choice.” But I didn’t want to be this woman’s only choice, I wanted to be her choice.

  “I’m not sure talking about it would help us.”

  My stupid heart jumped at her last word. I knew I shouldn’t, but I fucking asked anyway. “There’s an us?”

  “No.”

  Reality stomped down.

  “I wasn’t talking about when…” she trailed off, leaving the last part hanging.

  No way was I going to let that slide. “I’ve touched you every way a man can touch a woman, Siren.” She needed to be reminded. “You can say sex.”

  She glanced behind us but I’d already looked when she’d started talking.

  “She’s not listenin’ to us.”

  Snoring, her jacket over head, Kendall was out.

  Siren was quiet a moment. “Was it just sex?”

  I looked at her as the passing street lights flickered across her face. Everything she’d been through showed in her expression like an open wound. “No,” I said firmly.

  She quickly looked away. “You should be with someone…easier.”

  “I don’t want easy.”

  “I’m not ready to talk about this.”

  “I am.” I pushed.

  She shrunk toward her door.

  I couldn’t take another second of not touching her. I held my hand out and lowered my voice. “Reach for me.” I couldn’t make the first move, not after tonight. She had to come to me.

  “It’s not right,” she whispered.

  When she didn’t say no, my heart rate kicked up. “What we shared wasn’t wrong.”

  She sucked in a sharp breath. “Please don’t do this.”

  “Then tell me you don’t want me.” I was an asshole for pushing her right now but she needed to pick a side. “Tell me and I’ll leave you alone.” As much as it killed me to say it, I knew I had to.

  She didn’t speak. She didn’t move.

  I dropped my voice to a quiet command. “Take my hand.”

  Shaking, she started to lift her hand off her thigh.

  I didn’t hesitate. I took her small hand and wrapped my fingers through hers. A quiet but anguished sob broke free and she turned to me. Holding the steering wheel with my knee, I cupped the back of her head and brought her to my chest. “It’s okay.” I kissed her hair, her forehead. “I got you, darlin’, I got you.”

  She dissolved into tears.

  Stroking her hair, her back, I comforted her as best as I could from the driver seat but she only cried harder. “Hang tight, Siren.” I cut across the lanes and flew down the next exit ramp. As soon as I was off the highway, I pulled over and threw my door open. “Shh, shh, baby, I’m comin’ to you. Just hold on a sec.” Untangling myself from her grip, I jumped out and rushed to her side. Wrenching the door open, I unlatched her seat belt, pulled her from the car and took her into my arms. “I gotcha now, darlin’. I’m right here. Let it out.” I whispered every comforting thing I could think of as I held her tight.

  The anguished sobbing wracking her small frame destroyed me.

  “Shh, it’s gonna be okay. I’m right here. I got you.”

  She cried harder.

  Her tears soaked my shirt and bled into my heart. I’d caused this. Me. Every bullshit thing I’d said about not being sorry, I wanted to take back. I cupped her face and tilted her head up. When she looked at me, I broke. “I’m sorry. I’m so fuckin’ sorry.”

  Her chest shook with restrained grief, she closed her eyes and every muscle in her tortured body gave up. Her arms fell from my waist and her knees gave out.

  “Fuck.” I caught her and almost fell back against the Challenger. Kicking the passenger door shut, I slid to the ground with her in my arms.

  Cradling her to my chest, I did the only thing I could. I rocked her.

  But she didn’t stop crying.

  I wiped her tears. I brushed her hair from her face. I held her as tight as I dared.

  And I watched her heart break.

  I remembered the day I lost my wife. “You have to feel it, darlin’.” I knew grief. “You have to let it happen.” I stroked her hair.

  Her pain cutting through her, her body wrecked, she simply let the grief take over.

  I couldn’t do a thing for her.

  “I’m so sorry,” I whispered.

  WATCHING SIREN BREAK CRUSHED ME. I would have swallowed my pride and taken every hit Randy had dished out if I’d thought in the end it would’ve made a difference but Siren was right. Randy didn’t want to live. He’d given up and he gave up on her. The second he’d fired that shotgun, he knew he was dead. He wasn’t trying to save Nic. He wasn’t being fucking honorable. He’d wanted a quick death because he knew if Maldonado’s men got a hold of him, he’d suffer. They would’ve tortured him for information on the LC’s operations, so he’d used me. He’d pulled that trigger and fucking used me.

  I hated him for it.

  But I hated him more for what he’d put Siren through. I stroked her hair as her heart broke for a man who didn’t deserve a single one of her tears. I kissed her forehead and wiped her cheeks. Her sobbing had quieted but her tears silently streamed.

  The night grew damp and she needed to hydrate but I couldn’t bring myself to get up because the selfish part of me wanted to keep holding her. It was all I’d wanted since she’d left my bed, just to have her in my arms.

  But not like this.

  “I gotta move us, darlin’.” I didn’t want highway patrol to find us or worse.

  She nodded but she didn’t move to get up.

  “I’m not lettin’ you go, you hear me? I’m just gonna put you back in the car, okay?”

  She wrapped her arm around my neck and the gesture of trust was almost more than I could take.

  “Good girl.” I kissed her temple and hoisted us up. The bruising on my chest burned and my arm stung but I didn’t give a shit. I wasn’t putting her down. “Easy now.” I opened the door and gently placed her in her seat.

  Kendall watched me with wide eyes but she kept her mouth shut.

  “You’re gonna be oka
y, darlin’, you hear me?” I pulled the seat belt out and clicked it into place.

  She nodded once and curled in on herself. She looked so small.

  I reached in the center console for a bottle of water. Unscrewing the top, I held it to her lips. “Drink for me, baby. I need you to hydrate.”

  Her hand trembling, she took the bottle and drank while I caressed her shoulder. When she pulled her lips back, I capped the bottle. “I’m gonna drive us the rest of the way now, but if you need me to pull over, all you gotta do is say so. Okay?” I brushed a strand of her hair from her face but she didn’t respond. “I need you to answer me, Siren.”

  “Okay,” her hoarse voice rasped.

  “One more hour, and I’ll get you outta this car,” I promised.

  She nodded.

  I stood and shut her door. Sucking in a few lungfuls of night air, I jogged around the front of the Challenger. Before I pulled back onto the road, I stroked Siren’s cheek and placed my hand on her thigh.

  Blue eyes full of sorrow met my glance and she reached for me. Wrapping her hands around my arm, she tucked her head down and closed her eyes.

  I leaned over and kissed her hair. “Sleep, beautiful.”

  I drove the rest of the way to Miami with her hands clinging to my arm.

  They were both asleep when I pulled into Blaze and Layna’s driveway. I looked over at Siren then reached behind me and tapped Kendall on the knee. Her eyes opened and she looked at me weirdly.

  “What?” I whispered.

  “Nothing.” She sat up.

  I gave her a look that said I wasn’t in the mood for any of her shit.

  Then she surprised the hell out of me. “You did right by her.” She nodded at Siren. “Few years ago, I would’ve fallen in love with you for that alone.” She busied herself with putting her jacket on.

  “You ever gonna tell me what happened?”

  “Nope.”

  “Is Candle your old man?”

  “Nope.”

  “Fuck buddy?”

  “Not even close.”

  “Roommate?”

  “Stop trying to guess.”

  “You involved with the LCs?”

  She sighed and looked at me. “Candle’s my friend, that’s all.”

  “Does he know that?”

  “You’d be surprised what Candle knows.”

  I was about to ask her what the fuck that meant when Siren stirred.

  I cupped her face and ran my thumb across her cheek. “Hey, darlin’, we’re here. Stay put, I’ll come get you.”

  Kendall climbed out behind me and went for the trunk.

  I stopped her. “I’ll grab the bags after I get you two inside.” Kendall nodded without any argument and I opened Siren’s door but when I went to help her with her seat belt, she pushed at my hand.

  “I got it.” Her voice was hoarse from crying.

  “I know you do but I’m still helpin’.” My tone gentle but firm, she was getting my help whether she wanted it or not. I helped her out of the car and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. Despite her earlier protest, she sagged into me. “Few more steps and we’ll get you horizontal, stretch that leg out.”

  “How’s your arm?” she asked tiredly.

  “I’m all good, darlin’. Don’t worry ’bout me.”

  She stopped and looked up at me. “Why wouldn’t I worry about you?”

  Jesus. I could stare into those eyes forever. And that scared the shit outta me. “You flirtin’ with me, Miss Archer?” I smiled.

  “I’m not a flirt.”

  Her innocence wiped the smile off my face. “I know, darlin’. C’mon, let’s get you two inside.”

  I unlocked the front door and disabled the alarm André, Blaze and I had installed.

  “Nice place.” Kendall looked out the wall of windows to the intracoastal beyond. “Whose is it?”

  “Blaze and Layna’s. Take the guest room down the hall on the right.” I led Siren toward the other guest room.

  “I’m starving,” Kendall called after us. “Can I look in the kitchen?”

  “Help yourself. I’ll get supplies in the mornin’.”

  “It is morning,” Kendall reminded me.

  I ignored Kendall and pushed open the door to the guest room I usually used when I was here. King-sized bed, attached bathroom with a huge tub, the room faced the front of the house. I led Siren to the bed and gently sat her down.

  “You wanna take a shower?” I kneeled and pulled her boots off.

  Her chin to her chest, her hands in her lap, she didn’t answer.

  “I’ll give you some privacy while I grab the bags outta the trunk.” I stood and made it two steps.

  “Are you sleeping in this room?”

  Taken off guard, I turned. She still had her head down. “Look at me, Siren.”

  Her shoulders rose with a breath and she lifted her head.

  “Do you want me to?”

  Her penetrating stare was her only response.

  “Lots of places in this house to catch some z’s but I’m not a mind reader. You gotta let me know.” I tried like hell to keep my tone even and my body language neutral.

  “You’re upset.”

  “No, darlin’, not at all.” I exhaled and ran a hand through my hair. “You just took me by surprise,” I admitted.

  “You assumed we would sleep in the same bed.”

  It wasn’t a question but I nodded anyway.

  She dropped her head again.

  “Lemme grab our bags and pull the Challenger in the garage. You get comfortable and I’ll be back in a few to make sure you fall asleep, okay?”

  She half shrugged, half nodded.

  I wasn’t sure if I’d read her hesitation right. Didn’t matter. I wasn’t going to leave her alone until she fell asleep anyway. I walked out before she could tell me not to come back.

  Kendall was messing around in the kitchen. “She okay?”

  No, she was a fucking mess. “Yeah.”

  “Do you need me to go talk to her?”

  If I thought for one minute Kendall had a sympathetic bone in her body, I’d say yes. “Leave her alone, Kendall.” Fuck, I was tired.

  “You know she’s never been on her own?”

  I paused at the front door. I knew she’d left her parents and moved in with Randy. “Your point?”

  “She has no one now.”

  “She has me.” I hoped like hell I was enough.

  I grabbed the bags after pulling the Challenger in the garage. I’d rent a car later, but for now, I needed to know Siren was okay and then I needed some fucking sleep. I left my bag and first aid kit in the living room then dumped Kendall’s bag by her door. I debated knocking for half a second before entering Siren’s room. I’d never been the guy who knocked but Siren was making me question everything about myself. In the end, I walked in like I belonged there.

  Curled in a ball on top of the covers, she didn’t look up.

  I walked to the edge of the bed and brushed a strand of her hair from her shoulder. “You want somethin’ more comfortable to sleep in?”

  She shrugged.

  I felt like she was slipping away from me. “C’mon, you need to get outta those clothes.” Randy’s blood stained the front of her shirt.

  “Okay.”

  I reached for her bag but when I looked inside, she had even less clothes than she’d had before. A few pairs of underwear, her running shoes and a pair of running tights, she literally didn’t have another shirt besides the one on her back. Cursing under my breath, I wanted to buy her so many fucking outfits, she’d never be in this position again. “Be right back.” I strode out of the bedroom, trying to control my anger.

  I could’ve grabbed something of Layna’s—she wouldn’t have given a fuck—but I got one of my T-shirts instead. Striding back into the bedroom, I sat down next to Siren and pulled her into a sitting position. Gently lifting her shirt over her head, I tried not to stare. Even in a sports bra she was fucki
ng beautiful. I slipped my T-shirt over her head and laid her back down. She didn’t look up until I reached for the waistband of her pants.

  Alarm spread across her face.

  “Just getting’ you comfortable, darlin’.” I smiled and slipped the leggings over her hips.

  She rose up so I could pull them down her legs but when I got to her thigh, the fabric stuck.

  Knowing there was only one reason that would happen, I tried like hell not to lose my cool. “Your wound’s bleedin’?”

  She flinched. “I’m fine.”

  Shit. I pulled back the pants as gently as I could and my jaw clenched. “Who took the stitches out?”

  “I did.”

  “I told you I would do that.”

  “You said a couple of days. It’d been two days. They were itching.”

  “The top of the wound isn’t even closed,” I accused.

  “It was. It must’ve come apart…tonight.”

  I closed my eyes and inhaled to calm the fuck down. I was mad at myself, not her. I should’ve checked her leg after I pulled her out of that window. “Stay.” I grabbed my kit from the living room then knelt beside the bed and inspected the wound. Red and inflamed, it looked like hell. “You went running.”

  “I needed to get out and stretch.”

  “With a ten-inch knife wound on your thigh?” I was trying not to be an asshole but seeing her bleed was making me fucking lose it.

  She didn’t answer and I kept my mouth shut in case I said something else I’d later regret. I sterilized the wound and considered putting a stitch or two back in but decided she’d been through enough hell for one day so I used a few butterfly bandages. “This should hold but I’ll check on it tomorrow.” I looked up at her. “You have to give this time to heal.”

  “Okay.”

  I couldn’t read her expression. “Have you been wearin’ your wrist splint?”

  “Yes.”

  I stood and pulled the covers back. “C’mon, you need some sleep.”

  She crawled to the pillows and slipped her feet under the covers. Swimming in my T-shirt, her eyes looking too big for her face, she stared at me. “Thank you.” She said it like she meant it and I felt like an asshole for snapping at her.

  I pulled the covers up around her. “You want some pain meds? It’ll help you sleep.”

 

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