A Murder Most Odd

by Beth Byers

  Vi touched her throat and then grinned at Lila, her gaze moving over her friend who had selected an all-black dress with fringe to hide whatever excess remained from carrying a baby.

  “Maybe I’m just claiming Vi then,” Jack suggested. “After all, everyone is fixated on the…what did you call it Vi? A pile of buillon I’ve fairly won.”

  “Fairly?” Kate demanded. “That’s not what I heard.”

  “What did you hear?” Jack asked, grinning easily.

  “I heard you stepped in, dark and mysterious. That’s hardly fair.”

  “With those shoulders,” Isolde added, causing Tomas to tug her close and squeeze her tight. “Who could resist?”

  “And that clever mind,” Lila added. “Not everyone can offer a clever mind.”

  “It was none of that,” Victor countered. “It was that he saw her for who she was and liked her all the same. Accepting of her cleverness, willing to let her be as smart as he was, smarter even. The way to Vi is through her mind, as only her twin could understand.”

  “According to Jerome,” Lila added, “the way to all women is through their mind first.”

  “Ew!” Kate shook her head. “Don’t bring that fellow into it. I dreamed of him and your stepmother last night, woke up disgusted, and couldn’t slide back into sleep.”

  “Isn’t that the man who is trying to romance your mother?” Tomas asked Isolde.

  Vi’s little sister had spent much of the time at this party distracting Lady Eleanor, since she was always better behaved with her children around, so Isolde hadn’t been in on what Vi had done. They had become close enough, however, and Isolde guessed immediately.

  “Are you the one who set him on her?”

  Vi’s slow grin was her only reply.

  “Vi,” Isolde breathed, “you are evil.”

  “Have you heard of karma?” Victor asked Isolde. “Sometimes we’re just instruments of karma’s will. There’s nothing else the rest of us can do but obey her whims.”

  Isolde ignored Victor to stare at Vi. Slowly shaking her head, she said, “Mother can never know. If she realized what you’ve done--” Isolde shook her head, her pretty blue eyes wide and worried. She didn’t finish the statement, but Vi could see that Isolde was sure the result would be terrible. The thing Isolde was missing was that Vi and Lady Eleanor barely tolerated each other. What was she going to do?

  “Distract Lady Eleanor then, Isolde,” Jack suggested. “Your mother is not a fool. But no one can notice everything. If you turn her attention away, perhaps a level of peace could be maintained.”

  “I was going to agree to a little something for Geoffrey,” Tomas said gallantly. “Perhaps it is time to tell her.”

  Victor’s brow rose. “Really? He’s not even your brother?”

  “He’s Isolde’s though,” Tomas said. “What’s a few thousand pounds to get him started when I have so much?”

  Victor’s gaze narrowed and he asked, “What did you say to her about it?”

  “I told her I’d consider settling money on Geoffrey if she’d limit her visits to our country house to twice a year, upon invitation only, and the same with visits to the London house. No more just showing up at 10 a.m. and demanding Isolde spend the day with her as though she were nothing more than a pretty accessory.”

  “Tomas!” Isolde’s gaze was wide.

  “He’s your brother,” Tomas told her. “We have more than enough. Even if we have ten children, we have more than enough. And our peace and happiness is worth a fortune.”

  “Consider and reconsider,” Victor told Tomas. “If she’s got her mind on you and what it’ll take you to agree, she might notice Vi’s shenanigans.”

  “It’s hard being the one she likes,” Victor told Tomas with a wicked grin.

  “I can handle it,” Tomas said, clearing his throat.

  No one believed him for a moment. Not if he was willing to buy off his mother-in-law for a little peace.

  “Here’s the thing you need to understand, my friend,” Victor told him. “You need to be able to snatch back the money, so she has to obey the agreement. Once she’s got what she wants from you, she conveniently forgets the particulars of the arrangement and smiles blithely while you lose your mind.”

  Tomas paused and then his gaze narrowed. “This is why I need you. You already know how Lady Eleanor thinks.”

  “What do you mean?” Isolde asked. “She won’t do that.”

  Vi grinned at her sister. They were half-sisters, so Lady Eleanor was Isolde’s actual mother. The blindness of childhood faith and love still struck Isolde when Victor and Vi had learned Lady Eleanor’s ways before they’d been old enough to go away to school. The truth was, however, Lady Eleanor would absolutely do whatever she wanted once the funds were permanently Geoffrey’s.

  Victor patted the top of Isolde’s head and told her, “You’ll understand in time, little kitten.”

  Isolde batted Victor’s hand away. “Tomas, dance with me. They’re being mean.”

  Tomas lifted Isolde’s hand, pressing a kiss on her palm, and Victor and Denny groaned in unison.

  “She’s my little sister, old man,” Victor told his long-time friend. “Please, for the love of all that is good and holy, stop.”

  “She's the mother of my son,” Tomas countered with a proud grin.

  Vi giggled into Jack’s arm since he’d stiffened at the statement. He said, “That’s our cue to dance as well.”

  Jack tugged Vi onto the ballroom floor and swung her into an old-fashioned waltz. Rather than playing jazz music, there was a four piece quartet playing old-fashioned dances. Vi blinked in surprise and shock and then felt the weight of Jack’s hand on her back, the press of his body against hers and realized they really didn’t waltz enough.

  Food was served in a room off of the ballroom with plates that could be filled with anything from lobster tails to slices of prime rib. There was even a cold strawberry soup that begged to be eaten after hours of dancing and the heat of the filled room.

  Vi held both her and Jack’s plates while he filled for both of them. They found their way through the crowd and realized that Denny and Lila had already laid claim to a table and saved them a seat.

  “Did you sneak in here before they were even serving food?” Jack asked as he settled their plates on the table and held out a chair for Vi.

  “We did,” Lila said without regret. “Denny was determined to get the pick of the chocolate treats, and I was determined to put up my feet.”

  “The servants tried to turn us away,” Denny said easily, “but we won out in the end and even found a fellow to bring some of your coffee, Vi.”

  Vi’s gaze widened and she leaned in happily. Being hot didn’t matter when there was Turkish coffee on the table. Vi moved between her coffee and her cold strawberry soup as the room slowly filled. Her gaze widened when she saw Lady Eleanor instructing Jerome on what to get her and then parading to a table in the center of the room.

  “Did you see Smith and Beatrice?” Lila asked. “It was a sight for the ages. Something to hold you warm at night and warm the cockles of your heart.”

  “Exactly what are the cockles of your heart?” Denny asked.

  Lila shrugged. “This was fun. I’m not a woman for a scavenger hunt, but you throw in a pretty mask to make me look like a bird, an evening dancing with just Denny, and then an excess of rich foods, and I’m nothing but pleased. I might even decide to like Mr. Russell, and I rarely find it worthwhile to like anyone other than the few of us.”

  “The cockles of your heart,” Kate started, “are the ventricles.”

  “The what?” Denny demanded.

  Kate started to answer and then stopped. Her gaze met Denny’s and she grinned wickedly as she clearly thought it wasn’t worth explaining. Instead, she said, “It means the deepest feelings of your heart have been touched.”

  “I don’t know if I have those,” Denny joked.

  “You’re a big old soft-hearted fool,
” Lila told him flatly. “You have all kinds of innermost feelings, and they’re full of Lily and I.”

  “Followed by me,” Vi joked. She tangled her fingers with Jack’s, watching the crowd come and go. Loopsie and Reese weren’t far down the line for dinner, and Loopsie held the plates while Reese got food for them both. They were chatting as though Loopsie hadn’t been crying in the bushes the last time Vi had seen her.

  Reese had a wide grin on his face and Denny leaned in to tell Jack, “That bloke is sure he won. And he’s sure that the prize is valuable enough to finance some adventure he wants to take.”

  “It probably is,” Jack replied. “Russell pulled out all the stops for this celebration. It’s probably enough to do a lot of things.”

  Vi rubbed her thumb along her jaw, staring at Reese. He had taken a seat next to Percival and then glanced around the table, freezing awkwardly at the sight of the Lissow couple. Instead of excusing himself, he simply shrugged and placed a napkin on his lap. A servant moved in and delivered glasses of champagne. Lady Eleanor was also at the same table with Jerome, and Vi watched as her stepmother smiled at him.

  “My goodness,” Vi whispered in dawning horror. Her plan was backfiring. Her fingers dug into Jack’s wrist, and he followed her gaze. Lady Eleanor’s face transformed into a pretty laugh and Vi gaped. Her stepmother had never looked more like Isolde than she did in that carefree moment, and Vi thought she might vomit.

  “What have you done, Vi?” Victor asked in a low voice. “I’ll never get this out of my mind. Never.”

  Denny’s giggle filled the air and Vi’s hearing was coming in and out as the sound of her heartbeat rose in her head. That’s why she didn’t hear the scream right away. Once she recognized the sound, it took her a moment to realize it wasn’t just her own internal horror, but someone else screaming. Jack jerked away from Vi and Lady Eleanor rose, her eyes matching Vi’s in wide horror. Why was her stepmother so upset?

  Slowly, Vi turned. She’d heard screams like this before, screams of terror. That’s why her expression didn’t change when she saw him… the lovely Reese Stafford was lying dead in his soup. Her repugnance at Lady Eleanor’s possible relationship with Jerome now shifted to dread.

  Chapter 9

  The local constable eyed them all and said, “I’ve already called Scotland Yard.”

  The guests had been moved back into the ballroom, but Vi could hear the screams still echoing in her ears. She had her arm wrapped around Rita while Ham and Jack were dealing with what could be seen. Vi had seen both of them taking notes before the police arrived including leaning down to sniff the soup and examine the area around Reese.

  The constable was the fellow who’d investigated at the fête and they’d ignored everything he was up to and investigated on their own. He was a good man, but he wasn’t of the caliber of Ham and Jack, and the man knew it. He met their gaze, and moved around the scene.

  When Reese first collapsed, they’d pulled him out of his soup. They’d tried to help him. They’d checked his pulse and they’d sent for a doctor, but it had been too late. The doctor had shaken his head and glanced around the room. He’d whispered to Ham who had nodded.

  Vi didn’t need to hear what Ham had said. She’d smelled the bitter almonds and seen the effect. Reese Stafford had been poisoned. It wasn’t official yet, but it would be.

  Ham glanced at Rita, who had taken a seat nearby when it was evident that nothing could be done but to wait for the local doctor and constables to arrive.

  “Shall we go as Constable Elliott has requested?” Ham asked.

  Rita, who had turned a sickly green, only nodded in reply. Ham pulled her to her feet and Vi followed carefully after her friend. Vi knew it wasn’t the murder that was making Rita seem quite so helpless. It was the wedding and Rita was hating herself for her concerns about it.

  “We’ll be in the library,” Ham told the constable.

  They bypassed the ballroom, but Ham told Victor, “Find Smith and Beatrice. Set them to work if you can do it on the sly.”

  Victor nodded and then headed away from the side door and towards the main doors into the ballroom. Maybe he’d be able to sneak in and get things in motion.

  The constable followed them to the door and said, “We’ll get names and start finding out who knows what.”

  He said it in a way that seemed to both invite advice and decline it at the same time. His gaze moved over the group of friends who had interfered with, meddled in, and solved more murders than the vast majority of detectives would face in their lifetime.

  “That’s an excellent start,” Jack said easily. He nodded at the man and said, “You’ll be fine.”

  Constable Elliott cursed under his breath and said, “Did you see anything?”

  Ham shook his head, answering for all of them. He glanced at Jack who also shook his head.

  “My eyes were fixed on the table where he died, as he died,” Vi told the constable, “and I saw nothing. Granted, I wasn’t looking specifically at him, but there wasn’t anything overt.”

  “There wouldn’t have been,” Kate said as she glanced back for Victor and then followed the others.

  “They’re always sneaky,” Denny muttered. “It doesn’t matter if you’ve seen it before. No one ever thinks—murder! It’s always a terrible accident and then a realization that what you want to be an accident was deliberate.”

  The constable lifted a brow and then said, “I suppose it could have been a stroke.”

  Vi thought back to the young, strong, energetic Reese and didn’t shake her head. “Or poison.”

  The constable frowned. “One can hope it was merely a terrible accident.”

  Ham shook his head and clapped the constable on the back. “Dr. Hollands and I both smelled bitter almonds.”

  Violet had eaten the same soup that Reese had fallen facedown into. She didn’t think a terrible accident was on the table of options even without the scent of bitter almonds. But there was no point to argue. The police doctor would make an official declaration and it would guide the investigation.

  He needed to get to work, and the rest of them had a deadline. Vi met Ham’s gaze and she saw the banked fury in those eyes. She nodded at him once and then at the rest of their group. They were united. This wedding would go off if they had to kidnap a vicar and hijack a church.

  Mr. Russell had abandoned them earlier with the body while trying to keep control of the remaining guests. Vi had peeked into the room before the constables had arrived, however, and she’d seen a lackluster performance from the quartet. Mr. Russell was promising some sort of happily ever after where it would all end up being a terrible accident, and a good portion of the guests had taken to the chairs, or leaning against blank portions of the wall, and a few of the more intrepid were sitting, picnic style on the shining floors. The only thing that could be said for sure was that they’d be out of cigarettes before the night was over.

  To her surprise, Lady Eleanor followed along with the earl when Victor returned. They reached the library almost in unison and Victor crossed to the fire, lighting it. Vi and Kate slid into the same oversized chair on one side of the fire while Rita took the seat opposite.

  “What is it about us?” Rita demanded. “Why does this always happen to us?”

  “You traffic with corrupt people and snakes in the grass,” Lady Eleanor told them flatly. “This doesn’t happen among—”

  “Enough Ellie,” the earl told his wife. There was a feel of pure steel in his voice and her mouth snapped shut. “Just enough. Our children and their friends aren’t murderers. They’re not criminals, and we aren’t going to berate them for the things that happen while they’re around.”

  Lady Eleanor’s gaze bulged and she huffed, looking away as though she were indulging him instead of obeying his order. When he wasn’t looking her way, the looks she was sending were dark and furious, but Vi ignored all of it. There was much to do, and Lady Eleanor’s feelings were the lowest on the list.


  Rita’s gaze turned from the fire to lock with Vi’s. If it were possible to shoot waves of love and support to another person, Vi was doing that for Rita. Her eyes were welled with a watery sheen that she blinked carefully away before they could roll down her face and make things more difficult.

  “You aren’t a bad person for not wanting this to ruin your wedding,” Violet told Rita in a low whisper. Violet had faced a similar situation, and she knew how easy it was for the guilt to grow. It seemed to be impossible to not be sad that your wedding would be affected while knowing that wedding dreams crashing were the least of the problems associated with a person’s death. Somewhere out there, Reese’s parents were going to learn they’d lost their son. His friends were mourning their companion. His lover was going to have to face the life ahead without him.

  “We’re getting married Saturday morning if we have to do it between police interviews and with only our closest friends in attendance.” Ham’s calm statement had Rita’s gaze moving to him quickly. He hadn’t left the doorway of the library by more than a step or two, and his hands were fisted at his sides. “All we wanted this whole time was the people we love to be with us. We can still have that. This oversized event was your father’s dream, and we aren’t delaying to do it again.”

  “But—” Rita started.

  Ham shook his head. “None of us killed that man and as far as I’m concerned we’re just…”

  He wanted to make up some lie about it being an accident, but none of them believed it. Ham cursed and glanced at Jack. They’d worked together on too many deaths, too many horrifying moments, too many stolen lives to not know what they’d seen even if Dr. Hollands hadn’t confirmed it.

  “Let’s not start by kidding ourselves,” Jack said. “We saw Reese with his lover, we saw him bouncing about through the hedge maze. We saw him working the scavenger hunt and dancing with vigor. He didn’t just fall dead without a reason. What we need to know is why this happened.”