The Day I Lost You: A totally gripping psychological thriller

by Alex Sinclair

  “Hello, Mrs. Stellar here. I would like the police to come to my apartment, please,” the old lady says. She continues to give them her details and goes on to explain that I am trespassing on private property—despite the fact that she invited me into her apartment. She tells the operator how she has bravely handcuffed me to her radiator. I hear her responding to some piece of information from the police. I hope they’re explaining that they’re already on their way to the building in regard to a kidnapping.

  “That’s a false call,” she says. “The woman who made that claim is not to be trusted.”

  My heart skips a beat, and I pray the police don’t take this crazed woman seriously. Somehow, the old lady can’t seem to make the connection that Desmond is the reason behind the need for the authorities to be rushed out, no matter what I say.

  I shake my head and tug on the cuffs again and again. I need to get out of these things if I am to have even half a chance of finding Alice.

  Thirty-Three

  I gaze down at the handcuffs secured to my wrist and rattle them against the metal of the radiator pipe while Mrs. Stellar continues to stare at me. She has finished speaking to the police, who were already inbound. I can imagine the officers trying to work out what the hell is going on at Stonework Village. First, there is a kidnapping; now there is an old lady telling them that isn’t true, but that there is a dangerous individual restrained in her apartment.

  “You don’t have to do this,” I say, as I lean toward her. “I’m not a threat to you. I’m just trying to find Desmond and get my daughter back.”

  The old lady crosses her arms tighter. “I know that nice young man well, dear. He wouldn’t do anything like that. There’s no lying your way out of this one with stories about kidnapping.” She places the key to the cuffs down on the counter beside her.

  I shake my head and try to contain my incredulity. “You have no idea what you are talking about. Desmond is the one who should be in handcuffs. As I said, he’s taken my daughter.”

  The old lady dismisses me with a flailing of her arms. “Lies. It’s women like you who make men afraid to leave their own homes these days. I rarely get to see that nice young man. He’s probably scared of people like you, throwing around accusations and causing trouble.”

  I realize there is no getting through to this demented crone. She has come to her own conclusions and won’t see me in any other light. Desmond, for whatever reason, is her hero. I am her villain. I have nothing else I can use to get through to her. My only option is to break this radiator pipe and run away before the police arrive.

  I test the strength of the pipe by pulling hard in different locations and directions. I can see a few spots that are weaker than the rest and decide to focus on them.

  “You won’t break that off, dear. That pipe has only just been replaced. Desmond did it himself. If you are innocent as you claim to be, then you’ll do your best to stay put and not make this any worse for yourself.”

  I sigh heavily and stop trying to break the pipe free from the wall. “I’m not your enemy,” I say. “I’m a mother, just like you.” I point my free hand to a framed photograph of two boys that sits on the kitchen counter. The old lady flicks her eyes to the photo and picks it up carefully.

  “My two boys. They were such nice young men. Always coming to see their dear old mom.”

  I hear the woman using past tense and realize the two are either deceased or out of her life. I have no way of knowing what the answer is unless she says more. Instead of revealing more information to me, she just stares longingly at the picture and smiles.

  I have to keep the conversation going. “You don’t see them anymore? That must be hard for you.”

  Her eyes snap to mine. A slight wave of confusion fills her brow, as if she has forgotten she has a woman handcuffed to a pipe in her kitchen. “It is hard, but it’s not their fault. They shouldn’t have been driving that day. I should have told them to take the subway instead. It’s my fault they aren’t here.” I see the pain in her eyes and understand that her sons died in some sort of car accident. I don’t probe as to where her husband is.

  “They look like they were good boys,” I say, trying to appeal to her one giant weakness. I can see why she has taken a liking to Desmond. He’s a dead ringer for one of the boys in the photo, though he is at least ten years older.

  “They were lovely young men. Both had wonderful futures ahead of them, once they finished college. They were going to achieve astonishing things. I just knew it in my heart.”

  I let a moment of silence pass by before I speak. “I’m sorry for your loss.”

  Mrs. Stellar smiles at me as she holds the frame closer to her body. I feel like I could ask her to let me go and she wouldn’t give it another thought. That possibility disappears the second she spots the handcuffs again.

  “Don’t try and play me, dear. My two boys were probably distracted by deceitful harlots like yourself.” She places the frame carefully down. “Don’t think you can trick your way out of here.” The old lady looks to the open door of her apartment. “Any minute now, the police will be here to take you away.”

  I wonder how accurate that is, given how long the police have taken to respond. Had enough time passed for the authorities to arrive? I want the police here, but not to arrest me. Desmond will be long gone to his next hiding place by now. I’ll never find him. I push the image of Alice, scared out of her wits, from my head for a moment, so I can concentrate and be free of this mess.

  “You made me leave the door open,” Mrs. Stellar says, as she shuffles her way to the front door. I try to think on my feet as I realize the open door is the only way for Gus or anyone else to see me in here before the police arrive. If another resident were to see me like this, would they take my side or Mrs. Stellar’s? Either way, it’s better for me if that door remains open.

  “What were your sons studying at college?” I ask out of desperation.

  The old woman spins around, fond memories filling her mind as she gives up on her idea to close the door for the time being. She is still close to the front of the apartment.

  “Well, Jude was always keen to become an engineer, while Joseph was focusing on business.”

  “That’s interesting. And were they attending the same school?”

  “Yes. They were only a little over a year apart and almost inseparable. I couldn’t believe it when they both managed to get into the same school one year after each other. It was amazing news to tell the rest of the family.”

  I can picture her gloating at the end of the year in her Christmas letter to the rest of her family. She seems the type to boast incessantly about her sons’ achievements.

  “They were top of their classes, you know. Always striving for the best. Never settling for second place.”

  I doubt this is true. Judging by the photo, her sons passed away a long time ago, maybe ten years or more. Her memory of the time could have been warped to cast her sons as a pair of perfect angels who could do no wrong. But at some point, they had been involved in a car crash. Were they to blame? Had they been drinking that night? I could only guess. But if so, that fact would have been erased from her brain along with every other fault they had exhibited.

  The old lady lets out a long breath as she stares at the ceiling and turns around. She hustles over to the front door and reaches out to close it just as Gus steps into the frame.

  “Mrs. Stellar,” Gus says, “have you seen—”

  His words stop the second he sees me waving with my cuffed hand. “What’s going on here?” he asks Mrs. Stellar.

  “This harlot is trying to harass poor Desmond, so I called the police to come take her away.”

  Gus pieces together the scene before him and asks politely to come in. Mrs. Stellar lets him in without question, possibly delighted by the company. It’s quite likely the most interaction she’s had with anyone in a long time.

  I wonder if I’ll be like her when I’m old. Will I be on my own on
ce Alice leaves the house, slowly waiting for death to release me from my crippling loneliness?

  “Would you like something to drink?” she asks Gus.

  “No, thank you. What I would like is to take this woman off your hands and have her wait for the police downstairs.”

  “Oh no, I’m happy to help. Besides, she’s not going anywhere with those on.”

  “I can see that. Still, I don’t want you in any danger.”

  I try not to feel insulted as they discuss what to do with me, like I’m a rabid dog. I can see what Gus is trying to do, but Mrs. Stellar appears to be one determined old bat.

  Gus stares at me and shrugs as the old lady shuffles around the kitchen. I direct his eyes to the handcuff keys on the counter. He sees them and gives me a wink.

  “Are you sure you don’t want anything, Gus?”

  “You know what, I will have a drink. I’d love a coffee, thanks.”

  The task lights up Mrs. Stellar’s eyes. She probably loved serving her family when her two sons were younger. The simple pleasure of preparing a coffee for her guest will keep her mind distant and distracted while Gus steals the keys.

  He swivels around and places his body in front of the keys. He slowly steps back and secures them in one hand. Mrs. Stellar turns around as he approaches me. “Sugar? Milk?”

  “Yes, to both. Two sugars, thanks.”

  She spins away and busies herself with the coffee. I doubt that’s how Gus takes his coffee, but the order is enough of a distraction to allow him to pass me the key. I don’t waste a second and undo the cuff. I rub my wrist while Gus steps forward and blocks Mrs. Stellar’s view of me.

  She moves toward him and hands over a piping hot cup of coffee. He takes a decent gulp of the steaming liquid and lets out a breath of gratitude. “Thank you. That’s lovely.”

  I take the only opportunity I will have to leave and run for the door, key in hand.

  “Oh no!” Gus says as I run away. “Don’t worry, I’ll go after her,” he yells, as I rush off down the corridor.

  I don’t stop until I am around the next corner. “Don’t let her get away,” Mrs. Stellar shouts. I wait for Gus to catch up to me. We hurry further down the hallway until I can hide behind a support column.

  “What is her problem?” I ask the second we can speak.

  “Sorry about that,” Gus says, as I catch my breath. “She’s not all there, as you can tell.”

  I shake my head and focus on my breathing. “Now what?”

  “Now we find Desmond.”

  Thirty-Four

  Then

  I started packing our bags the second Michael left for work. I knew I should have waited at least an hour, but I couldn’t help myself. We had to go.

  “Everything is going to be okay, Bunny,” I said to Alice, as she stared back at me from her bouncer. She cooed and made bubbles with her mouth, utterly oblivious to the massive change I was about to throw into her six-month-old life. She didn’t deserve to have so much drama around her, but what could I do? We had to go. I no longer felt happy in this marriage, and the negativity was spilling over and into Alice’s developing brain.

  It wasn’t just my lack of happiness driving me out the door. It pained me to think it, but I knew Michael was preparing to do something drastic himself. I could sense it in the way he spoke to me and the way he ignored my every action in the apartment. He would ask me constantly how Bunny was doing, but never how I was coping. Our marriage was on the brink of collapse, and he could only ever check up on his child.

  The impromptu counseling session wasn’t an isolated incident. Every week, that man returned and tried to dismantle every decision I made regarding Alice’s welfare. It took me some time to realize it, but Michael was using the doctor to build a case against me. He wanted Alice taken out of my care.

  He knew I didn’t trust him anymore. How could I? Several times now he had offered to take Bunny off my hands to give me some time off to myself. Every time he said it, he told me he would take Alice out for the afternoon, away from the apartment and away from me. He never offered to stay in with her while I went out instead. I was convinced he had plans to take Alice from me and run away. Where he would go, I had no idea. My best guess was to his parents on Long Island, to leave Alice in their custody. They visited on occasion and also only ever seemed to be concerned for Alice and no one else. They tiptoed around me the way Michael did.

  It didn’t take a genius to work out that we were having issues. Anyone could see it if they merely looked for more than five seconds. Michael’s parents just tried to sweep the whole thing under the rug, as if it was normal for a married couple to have a complete breakdown in communication once a child came into the picture. Maybe that was their experience, but it wasn’t something I planned on putting up with for long.

  I finished packing both my overnight bag and Alice’s diaper bag with as many items as I could carry. I unclipped Bunny from the bouncer and lifted her up and into a car seat carrier. I would need to install it into the taxi that would meet us on the street outside.

  “Okay, Bunny, let’s just slide you into position and clip you in.” I heard the clicks of the harness as it buckled Alice safely into the car seat carrier. I just needed to bring the base along with me for the cab, and then we were all set to go.

  As I walked toward the front door, I remembered another essential item I would need to bring along with me: the stack of cash I had been slowly gathering. I had managed to save over five thousand in notes. Michael always left me too much money each week for things like groceries and nappies. He seemed to have no idea what anything cost anymore, and would often give me a small fortune in cash. I had scrimped and saved on items where I could, to slowly build up the reserves I’d need to leave him.

  I had only recently decided to take Alice and go, but I’d been hiding the money away the entire time. Did part of me know things wouldn’t work out between us, that he’d try to take Alice from me? It was sickening to realize I’d always known things would fall apart, that I’d have no choice but to take Alice and never look back.

  Michael had given me no alternative. His behavior over the past six months only served to make me think the worst of him. It was like he could not forgive me for the emergency birth. He hated me for being so stressed out that I caused Alice to be born early. It wasn’t my fault, but he failed to understand that. Now he was driving me to the point of no return by convincing me that he was going to steal Alice away from my protection, like I wasn’t a good mother. Well, I had plans of my own that day. No one was going to take my Bunny without a fight.

  With the money secured and everything packed that Alice and I would need for the next few days, I picked up the carrier, our luggage, and the base. If anyone asked what I was up to, I would tell them that we were visiting my mother for a day out of town. It wasn’t far from the truth. I would eventually need to see my parents for support. Just not right away.

  I shuffled toward the door, encumbered with more items than I could easily carry. Before I reached the door handle, it jiggled and opened as the electromagnetic lock disengaged. I almost dropped everything when I saw Michael standing in the doorframe. Confusion spread across his face as he stared at me; the door swung slowly open with a slight creak.

  “What are you doing?” he whispered.

  I stood, frozen. I couldn’t say a word. I had no excuses or reasons for the sight before him. I was about to leave the apartment with several of my belongings and our only child, without any explanation.

  “Nothing,” I said. “What are you doing?”

  Michael cleared his throat. “I forgot one of my reports for a client, so I came back to the apartment to grab it. What the hell is going on, Erika?”

  I relaxed my shoulders and put everything down carefully. I unclipped Alice and lifted her out of the carrier seat. I held her tight against my body and gently patted her back.

  “Well?” he pressed.

  With a heavy sigh, I closed my eyes
for a moment to think. When I opened them back up, Michael had moved a step closer. “What do you think I’m doing?” I asked.

  He crossed his arms over his chest. “It looks like you’re leaving… forever.”

  “Well then, no need to keep guessing, is there?”

  “God,” he said, as both hands landed on his forehead. “Why now? After everything we’ve—”

  “You know exactly why, Michael. Don’t lie to me. I can take everything else, it’s the lying that I can’t stand.”

  “What are you talking about?” he asked with wide eyes.

  I saw right through his facade and saw the BS he was spinning me. His training as a lawyer had made the lies from his mouth damn near impossible to detect, but I’d known Michael long enough to recognize what he was trying to do. There was little point in arguing with him.

  “Let’s not do this,” I said. “We’re past it. We’ve been past it for a while now. Just do the right thing and accept you can’t take her from me. Let us go.”

  Michael stared at me and glanced at Alice. I could see his face change when his eyes found her. He didn’t move them from that position until I spoke again.

  “Are you going to let us leave?” I asked.

  He snapped out of his trance. “Leave? Where exactly are you going?”

  “That’s none of your concern.”

  “Oh, I think you’ll find that it is,” he snapped.

  “Don’t raise your voice to me, or I’ll call the police.”

  “And what?” Michael asked. “You’ll tell them I hit you? Tell them I’m a danger to be around?”

  “I wouldn’t need to stoop to that level. They’d just have to spend five minutes alone with you to see what a terrible person you are.”

  I saw Michael’s nostrils flare as he breathed heavily and took another step toward us.