Because of You

by Julie Cannon

  He tossed a chunk of bread in her direction, along with a canteen that sounded more hollow than full, and it landed on the ground in front of her. Repeating his action in front of Barrett, he walked back the way he’d come.

  Kelly snatched the bread and tore it into smaller pieces. “You’d better eat. You may not get anything else for days.” She bit into the familiar hard bread.

  Since Barrett’s hands were still secured behind her back, she couldn’t hold her bread, and Kelly watched her look at it but not move toward it.

  “Look, I know it’s hard, but trust me. At least try to eat it. You’re hungry, and you need to keep your strength up.” She took another bite. “It was months before they let me have my hands in front of me. They were still secured, but at least I could feed myself.” Kelly remembered how she’d been so hungry she ate whatever the guards tossed her way, regardless of where it landed. She often had more dirt and leaves in her stomach than food. They wouldn’t let her starve to death, but they weren’t going to go out of their way to help her eat either.

  “Months?” No way would she be here that long. Debra would pay.

  “’Fraid so. At least it was for me and several others. Right now they don’t trust you, and since you’re worth quite a bit to them, or at least they think you are, they won’t risk letting you get away. I’m surprised they’re not standing right next to you now.” In the beginning, she’d been forced to endure the humiliation of a guard, sometimes two, observing her every move.

  “Well, they’re right. I’m out of here the first chance I get.” Barrett looked around, clearly surveying her potential escape route.

  “They’ll find you.” Kelly didn’t want her to experience the same punishment she had when she was found.

  “I don’t need to run. The Colonel was right. I have money, lots of it. All he has to do is name his price, and I’m on the next flight out of this piece-of-shit country.” Barrett spoke brazenly.

  “Don’t let them hear you say that.”

  “Why not? That’s what they want, isn’t it?”

  “Because if they think you can get it, they’ll take the ransom, keep you, and ask for more. They’ll keep asking every time your people pay, and you’ll never get out of here.” Kelly hated being so blunt, but the sooner Barrett knew the rules of the game the sooner she’d settle down and not get herself, or anyone else, hurt.

  “Fuck,” Barrett said simply.

  “Yes, you are fucked.” Kelly hated the word. “We all are, and if you believe in God, now would be a good time to pray.”

  Barrett’s head shot up and she looked at Kelly with defiance in her eyes.

  Two guards came their way. She’d named one of them Bruce, after actor Bruce Lee, because he constantly practiced karate moves. The other she called Little Boy, because he couldn’t keep his hands off his dick.

  She and her fellow captives had taken to naming the guards so they could refer to them when they talked. They weren’t often allowed to converse, and when they did they managed to share as much information as they could with each other. Each hostage shared their experiences with the guards to help the others from having to undergo the same.

  The rebels didn’t care what condition the hostages were in. They didn’t get any additional points for returning healthy hostages versus sick ones, so they provided only the minimum for them to survive. Food was scarce, shelter even more so, and they provided free labor for the guards, who were pissed to be glorified babysitters instead of fighting for the freedom of Columbia. The soldiers and The Colonel often took their anger out on them for no apparent reason. They’d learned hard and painful lessons and banded together when they could.

  Bruce said something to Barrett that Kelly had learned meant he was taking her to the bathroom. Barrett tried to get up too fast and ended up face-first in the dirt. Bruce laughed and, grabbing her arm, dragged her about five feet into the jungle.

  “He won’t hurt you. Don’t try to get away,” Kelly called. As soon as the words were out of her mouth she wished she hadn’t spoken them.

  Kelly waited anxiously for Bruce to return with Barrett. She knew she’d be punished for speaking, but she wanted to offer Barrett support, however little it was. The look on Bruce’s face when he returned confirmed her suspicions.

  After securing Barrett to the tree, Bruce approached Kelly and pulled her to her feet. Barrett couldn’t hear what was being said, but within minutes both men had her tied so she was face-to-face with the unconscious man between the trees. They tied a rope around Kelly’s waist, effectively lashing her to the other man. Her pelvis was pressed against the man’s bloody penis, and Barrett felt sick to her stomach. They wrapped another rope around their necks, pinning her face to his.

  Kelly had hardly struggled and was now silent and not moving. This time when the men spoke, Barrett heard and understood every word.

  “That will teach you to talk out of line, you bitch. How does it feel to have your cunt next to Lopez’s bloody dick? You’re to blame for all of this.” The man screamed in Kelly’s face, his English broken but understandable.

  “Hey, asshole,” Barrett yelled, grateful she’d remembered to say it in English and not give away the fact that she spoke Spanish. He spun around, obviously not expecting Barrett to talk to him.

  “Barrett, shut up,” Kelly said, her voice muffled.

  “No, I won’t shut up.” She kept her eyes on the man. “Yeah, you asshole. Do you think that makes you a big man? You’re nothing but a piece of shit and can only get your rocks off with a woman who’s tied up.”

  “Shut up, Barrett.”

  “Yeah, that’s right, big boy. I’m talking to you.” Even though her hands were still behind her back, she used her head to point to him. The pain of moving suddenly caught up with her, and she stifled a groan. Was it possible her ribs had been broken? She gritted her teeth. “You can’t understand a word I’m saying, you dumb shit, but you know exactly what I mean. Your kind always does.”

  She expected the blow when it came.

  Chapter Six

  Kelly could hardly breathe. It didn’t matter if she turned her face to the left or right; it was still inches from the man’s dirty, greasy hair. The smell of body odor, blood, and bodily fluids she didn’t care to think about drifted into her nostrils. The man’s blood was starting to seep into her clothes. She wanted to gag but willed herself not to. She hadn’t fought against Bruce and his fellow thug. Fighting would only make it worse.

  Barrett groaned.

  “Barrett?” When she didn’t answer, Kelly repeated her name.

  This time she answered with a moan.

  “Barrett, please talk to me. Are you all right?”

  Another moan. “My head hurts.”

  “Of course it does. Bruce packs a mean punch.”

  “No shit.”

  Kelly felt Barrett move, then say, “Oh, my God.”

  “I told you to shut up. You were too stubborn to listen to me, and look where it got you.” She was tied up exactly like Kelly, with Blue sandwiched between them. Barrett gagged and threw up. She had very little in her stomach so it was mostly the dry heaves.

  “Why did they do this?” Barrett asked quietly.

  Kelly turned her head the best she could to make sure no one was listening. “Because I talked to you without their permission.”

  “What?”

  Kelly couldn’t see Barrett but heard the shock in her voice. “We can’t speak unless spoken to first. One of The Colonel’s rules.”

  “Then why did you do it?”

  “Because I needed you to know so you didn’t try to run. Don’t try it, Barrett. They’ll find you and punish you severely. Make an example out of you like they did this guy.” She knew it was true, all the captives knew.

  “Goddamn it.” Barrett said.

  “Yeah, him too.”

  “I’ve got to get out of here. I can get out of here. I’m in pretty good shape, have a good sense of direction, and—”


  “Are you out of your mind? You can barely see, you probably have a concussion, you haven’t eaten in days, and, in case you’ve forgotten, you’re strung up in a tree like a trophy kill. I won’t even mention that you can barely walk.”

  “Don’t talk to me like I’m stupid. And don’t tell me what I can or can’t do.”

  “This isn’t all about you.”

  “Yes, this is all about me. You can sit on your hands and let these people control your destiny, but I’m not going to rot and die in this godforsaken place.”

  “If you try to escape, not only will you be punished, but we will too.”

  “Let me guess, another of The Colonel’s rules.” There was more than a little sarcasm in her tone.

  “Barrett, I’m just telling you what will happen and asking you not to do it.”

  “I don’t care. I’m not going to jeopardize my chance at freedom for anyone else.” It could have been minutes or it could have been hours before either of them spoke again.

  “How long are they going to keep us here?” Barrett asked. “My arms are getting numb.”

  “Probably all night.”

  *

  “How do you do it?” Barrett asked.

  Kelly had no idea how long they’d been lashed to this guy. Time had lost all meaning. The darkness had crept in, and she guessed that several hours had passed.

  “You learn to block it out. Not think about it. You disassociate from what’s going on. It’s a coping mechanism. You’ll learn. You’ll have to or you won’t make it.”

  “Where do you go?”

  “Anywhere but here. Sometimes it’s a dinner with friends, and it’s as if I’m actually there sitting at the table with them.”

  “What do you talk about?”

  The sound of Barrett’s voice was oddly comforting.

  “Nothing, really. You know, just girl stuff.”

  “Like what?”

  “Work, boyfriends, girlfriends, husbands. We bitch, commiserate, laugh, and sometimes cry. It’s either pizza, beer, and ice cream or wings, beer, and ice cream. One time we had lasagna, beer, and ice cream, but it just wasn’t the same.”

  “I see a pattern,” Barrett said flatly. “Tell me about your job. I think you said you’re a nurse?”

  “Yes, at Brookhaven Hospital in Denver. I’m in pediatrics.”

  “Denver? You don’t sound like you’re from Denver.”

  “I’m not,” Kelly replied. “Born and raised in Alabama.”

  “How did you end up in Denver?”

  “Long story.”

  “It’s not like we’re pressed for time here.” This is really bizarre, Barrett thought. Here they were in the middle of what could only be described as a nightmare, and they were talking about things like two people did on a first date.

  “Another time,” Kelly said, effectively shutting down that subject.

  “Okay.” Barrett shifted back to the original topic. “How long have you been at…I’m sorry, where was it again?”

  “Brookhaven. I’ve been there six years. But before that I was nine years at St. Michaels, across town.”

  “Why the move?”

  Kelly knew this conversation was ludicrous, but it kept her mind off the dead guy in front of her. “I moved,” she said simply. “I bought a house on the other side of town, and the commute was killing me. There’s more to life than driving more than an hour to get to work. Luckily I can pretty much get a job just about anywhere.”

  “Even in the middle of the jungle,” Barrett said. “Sorry,” Barrett said quickly. “So at your ladies’ night, who’s sitting to your left?”

  “Ariel. She’s my best friend and my worst enemy.”

  “How so?”

  “She holds my hand when I’m down, bails me out when I’m in trouble, and kicks my butt when I’m a bitch.”

  “Tell me a time when she did each of those.”

  “I know what you’re doing, Barrett.” Kelly kept her voice low.

  “Then keep talking. I need something to take my mind off this, so please go on.”

  “My fiancé dumped me at the altar. The church was packed, the reception hall decorated, and a sit-down dinner for eighty was waiting. I was in the back of the church with my four bridesmaids cooling my heels while the best man looked for the man who’d promised to love me for the rest of his life. When he came back alone he had a message from Charles that said he was sorry and I could keep the ring.”

  “What an asshole.”

  “Ariel was right there beside me for weeks. She took a leave of absence from her job and came to stay with me. I don’t know what I’d have done without her.” It used to hurt to think about it, now it was just a bad memory. Good riddance, he was a jerk, she thought.

  “When did she bail you out?”

  “When I was almost arrested.”

  “Arrested? You really do mean bail you out. That you’ve got to tell me,” Barrett said, and Kelly told her the rest of the story.

  “It was when we were in college. I was young, dumb, and naïve, and I found myself at a rather rambunctious party in a park. Things kind of got out of hand and one thing led to another and…well…let’s just say the moon was shining in more places than just in the sky.”

  “Do tell.”

  “No, I’ve said enough, thank you very much. Ariel has never let me forget it.”

  “As a best friend should.”

  “Funny, she subscribes to the same philosophy.”

  “And I suppose you didn’t think you needed to have your butt kicked.”

  “No. I definitely did,” Kelly said confidently.

  “I’m patiently waiting for this one, which is hard because I’m not normally a patient person.”

  “And you have quite the potty mouth.”

  “Sorry, force of habit.”

  “Ever get you in trouble?”

  “Nope.”

  “Bullshit.”

  Barrett managed to squeak out a little laugh. This entire situation was too bizarre for words. They were literally strung up with a dead Columbian rebel between them, and they were bantering like a couple of women without a care in the world. It was interesting, Kelly thought, how the mind reacted to stressful situations. Gallows humor, she thought it was called.

  “Touché. Someone once told me it was a defense mechanism. That I’m over-compensating for lack of confidence or self-esteem.”

  “Wow, didn’t see that one coming.”

  “Well, like you said, bullshit. Now about the ass-kicking.”

  *

  Barrett couldn’t feel her hands or feet when she woke. Her side ached, and the dull throb in her head reminded her it was still there. She jolted awake and immediately remembered where she was. Her stomach threatened to heave again, but she willed it not to. She had to get out of here.

  “Kelly?” she whispered. “Kelly,” she repeated, when the woman didn’t move. “Kelly, wake up. Jesus, don’t be dead.” Barrett choked on the last word.

  “I’m not, but this guy is.”

  An overwhelming sense of relief mixed with repulsion flooded Barrett. “How are you?” What a stupid question, she thought.

  “I’m okay. Did you get any sleep?”

  “Some,” Barrett replied.

  Kelly must have heard the guilt in her voice because she said, “I’m not surprised. You’ve been through a lot.”

  “I don’t need your pity.”

  “It’s not pity. It’s concern and caring for another human being, an action that obviously you’re not familiar with.”

  “I’ve been taking care of myself for more years than I can count, and I don’t intend to stop now.”

  Before Kelly could say anything else, a guard Barrett didn’t recognize came out of the jungle toward them with a very large knife in his hand. Her stomach tightened. Was he going to cut them down or do something else with it?

  The guard stopped in front of them, reached up, and cut the rope around her waist and the one hol
ding Kelly’s arms above her head. She fell to the ground in a heap. He repeated the same move on the dead man, who landed on top of Kelly. Finally he cut her ropes, and she somehow managed to miss both of them and landed hard on the ground.

  Bright lights sparkled in her eyes, and it took a few moments for her head to clear. When it did she saw Kelly struggling to roll the dead man off her. When she finally succeeded, she scrambled as far away from him as she could and vomited.

  *

  Kelly retched until her stomach threatened to come out, along with last night’s meager dinner. Wiping her mouth with the back of her shaking hand, she crawled over to her mat and collapsed. She was exhausted both mentally and physically. There was no way she could have slept in the position she was in. Covered in the guard’s blood and urine, she’d had to endure the bugs feasting on her sticky skin all night. She’d felt every breath he took and knew the moment he took his last. She closed her eyes.

  Water splashed across her face, and Kelly raised her hand to shield the sun from her eyes. Bruce was standing over her. She struggled to sit up and managed to before he lost his patience.

  “Yes, sir?” Kelly asked in the way she’d been taught. Not that she’d have completely understood whatever he said to her, but usually she got the general gist pretty quickly. Bruce motioned for her to grab the dead guard and follow him.

  The man’s eyes were open, staring into the air, and Kelly kept her focus anyplace but on what remained of his penis. Holding him by the wrists she walked, dragging the man with her inch by agonizing inch. He was heavy, and the heat and humidity had already started the rapid decay of his body.

  Crazy thoughts bounced in and out of her brain as she put one foot in front of the other. What happened to my car? What happened to Needles? Did Ariel take her? Is anyone making payments on my house? Who has all my stuff? Did Suzanne take all my Star Wars DVDs? What about the pearls my grandmother gave me? Oh, God, what did they think when they opened the middle drawer of my nightstand?

  She almost ran into the back of Bruce, who’d stopped in front of her. He pointed to a shovel, and it was clear she was to dig a grave for his dead comrade. She surveyed the area, thankful for the rain they’d had a few days ago. The ground was soft, and when the first whish of the shovel blade sank into the earth, she drifted off again.