Gifts of Love

by Raine Cantrell

  “How dare you!” She flew at him, ready to strike him, when she stopped herself and realized what she was doing. “Mace, don’t ever dare think such a thing. I’ve never, you hear me, never been ashamed of calling Becky and Jake mine. I never will be. I love them. Having Indian blood makes no difference to me. But since you brought this out into the open, there is something I want to say.”

  Erin rushed to the doorway to make sure that the two children didn’t overhear her. Coming back to stand in front of Mace, she took hold of his hand and dragged him off to the pantry.

  “When you wrote to me, you never told me about Sky or Becky or Jake. You should have, Mace. I know it wouldn’t have made a difference to me. But I could have hurt those children that day I walked into this house. It wasn’t fair to them.”

  “No.”

  “No? Is that all you have to say?” Folding her arms across her chest, Erin tapped her foot, feeling righteous and wanting satisfaction.

  “Yeah, that’s it.”

  “You’re not angry?”

  He drew her up against him. “How the hell can I be angry with a woman who loves the way you do?” Nibbling on her tempting lower lip, he smiled at Erin’s breathless little sound and backed her up against the shelves. “I can’t ever seem to get you alone anymore. If Becky isn’t tied to your apron strings, Jake is demanding your attention. Or,” he noted, laughter filling his eyes as passion deepened his kisses, which covered her face, “Maddie needs feeding or changing. As if having these three takes you away from me, I’ve got Ketch fussin’ or one of the men has mending or some gift for the baby.”

  Caressing her back, swinging her body back and forth so that she couldn’t mistake his need, Mace teased her mouth with brief searing kisses. “If you really love me, you’d stop starving me.”

  “Mace Dalton, for that you pay.” She controlled his lips, holding his head still, taking them both where they wanted to be, locked in passion’s embrace. Erin was the first to pull away. “Mace, please, it’s daylight. The children—”

  “One more kiss to keep me until tonight,” he coaxed, already taking her mouth.

  But Erin’s protest summoned the children and Scrap.

  Becky’s “Oh, Papa,” made them spring apart, Erin hastily smoothing her apron, Mace giving a heartfelt sigh.

  “Maddie’s wet, Erin.”

  With a shrug, Erin started for the pantry door, but gave him a kiss blown over her shoulder. “The joy of having a family,” she said, waving him off.

  Mace glared down at this daughter, son and the still pint-size dog sniffing at his heels. Privacy was in damn short supply. “There are times…” he began. Becky giggled and Jake followed. Mace fell back against the shelf, laughing himself. Yes, there were times, but he wouldn’t trade them. Not one.

  Later, after supper, while he helped Erin finish the dishes, he suggested they all make a trip into town.

  “But Maddie’s so young.” Erin didn’t want him to know how much she feared having people count on their fingers and give Mace knowing looks that would offend his pride.

  “I want us to go. Together. If what you said today was true—” She shot a glare at him, and Mace held up his hand. “I’m not saying that you lied to me, Erin. I just want us to be together. You can’t hide Maddie. She’s mine and sooner or later everyone’s going to know. I’ve got to go to a Grange meeting about the Nez Percé Indians. More and more of their reservation land is being given to white men. I can’t ignore that. ’Sides, it’ll give you a chance to shop and be away from chores.”

  His engaging grin had her smiling. Mace was proud, she knew. Could she have pride less than his? It would be nice to walk and see shops. She still had that twenty dollars saved.

  “You could get fitted for a few new gowns. Becky’s growin’ out of her clothes and Jake needs shoes.” Mace tossed aside the cloth and slid his hands around her waist, turning her to face him. “Tell me yes.”

  “Yes,” she whispered, unable to refuse him.

  Intending to spoil Erin, Mace installed her in the same hotel where they spent their wedding night and took the adjoining room for the children. He wanted time alone with Erin, but for now, this would have to do.

  Maddie was such a good baby that, once fed, she settled quietly for a nap. Mace took Becky and Jake in hand, telling Erin, “These two come with me. You spend the afternoon with a hot bath and rest.”

  “What hot bath?” Erin asked.

  “The one I’m on my way down to order.”

  The desire in his eyes made her nod, her own growing warm as she watched him leave with the children. A whole afternoon to herself. Bathwater she didn’t need to heat or carry away. Mace loved her, she was sure. She only lacked the words from him to make her joy complete.

  Mace told the desk clerk what he wanted, but was distracted by the entrance of a tall, lushly figured woman. Mace was as much a man as the next. The stylish cut of her clothes marked her as a stranger, but her walk…well, that told him she was a woman who knew her attractions to a man and used every one of them to her advantage. He stood aside as she approached the desk, idle curiosity in his eyes.

  After she sized him up and indicated her approval with a slow smile, she asked for a room from the young desk clerk.

  Her voice was husky and rich, bringing to mind warm whiskey and messed sheets. Mace grinned to himself at the thought. A look at the clerk showed that the man was trying hard to swallow.

  “Is there a way to get a message to a friend of mine?”

  “Oh, I’ll take it for you, ma’am.”

  “Not here in town. Matter of fact,” she said with a laugh, “I’m not sure exactly where she lives.”

  Jake tugged on Mace’s hand, drawing his attention away. Becky was motioning to him by the door. “Please excuse me, but I need one last thing sent to my wife’s room,” he said to the honey blonde, who once more smiled at him. Mace ignored the practiced invitation in her eyes. She might be better dressed than some, but a whore’s offering held no allure for him.

  He ordered a light meal for Erin, cautioning the clerk to make sure he did not wake the baby. He thanked the woman for waiting and turned to leave.

  “Now, about my message,” the woman said.

  Mace no longer listened. He thought about the present he was getting for Erin and left the hotel.

  “Good-lookin’ man,” the woman remarked.

  “That’s Mace Dalton. He’s here with is wife and baby. And those two are his. First marriage. Indian, she was.” The clerk stopped, sensing that he had lost the woman’s interest.

  “Ma’am? I’ll need you to sign the register.”

  “Yes. Yes, of course.” With a flourish, Maddie Darling signed her name. So that was Erin’s husband? And Erin was here in the hotel? She took the key handed to her, glanced at the room number and then up at the attentive clerk.

  “I couldn’t help hearing him order a meal for his wife. Would it be possible for me to do the same? I mean if our rooms aren’t too far so that it won’t be too much trouble for you.”

  “No trouble. You’re on the same floor. They have three ten and eleven and you’re down the hall, three sixteen.”

  Maddie couldn’t resist. She reached out and pinched his cheek. “You’re a sweetheart. If you’ll bring my bag, I’ll see to a nice tip for you.”

  Flustered as she knew he would be, Maddie hoped he would forget that he gave her Erin’s room number. She had no idea how long Erin’s husband would be gone, but the chance to see her and the baby was too strong to resist. With a little luck she would be in and out and Mace Dalton would never know about her.

  Erin expected the knock at the door. But when she opened it and found a woman standing with her back toward her, she started to close it.

  The woman turned and Erin could only stare, clinging to the edge of the door. “Maddie?” she asked after long moments. “Is it really you?”

  “None other.”

  Erin flung herself into Maddie’s open arms
, crying and hugging her tight. “Oh, I’ve missed you so!”

  Maddie didn’t doubt it, but she was aware that anyone passing in the hall could see them together. She managed to get them both inside, moved to a few tears herself when Erin, without asking questions, took her into the adjoining room to see the baby.

  Little Maddie’s hair was as dark as her mother’s. Fair skin, a small nose and a thick sweep of lashes had Maddie whispering how pretty she was.

  “And chubby, too,” Maddie added, longing to hold the child.

  “Don’t you want to hold her, Maddie?” Erin asked. “It’s all right, you know. She’ll stir a bit then go off to sleep. She’s a good baby.”

  Tempted as she was, Maddie put the idea aside and turned to Erin. “I know you must be wondering why I’ve come. When I wrote you, I wanted to see you, but got to thinking that maybe I’d spoil it for you, Erin.”

  “Spoil it for me? Maddie, I don’t understand. Here, come and sit on the bed with me. Mace won’t be back with the children for a while. And I’ve so much to tell you.”

  “I saw him, you know. Down in the lobby. He’s a fine-looking man. Young, too.”

  Erin smiled, but saw that Maddie cast another longing glance at the cradle where the baby slept. Patting the other woman’s hand, she rose and lifted her daughter, bringing her to Maddie. “Hold her. She won’t break. She wouldn’t be here but for you and your help.”

  “Don’t be saying things like that, Erin. You’d have found a way without me.” But she reached out for the baby, feeling a hunger of her own stir.

  The knock Erin had been expecting came and she went to open the door. Two maids brought in hot water for the tub behind a screen in one corner of the room. Since they had to make another trip with more water, Erin told them she would leave the door open for them, and returned to sit with Maddie.

  “Tell me, what made you decide to come?” Erin asked.

  “I left almost a month after you. Couldn’t take working for Jaffery. He got mean. Ugly and mean. The church ladies demanded they clean up the coast. More than a few places got closed down. I guess I got to thinking that I could do better and found out I was right. So much better, Erin, that I’ve got a gent of my own paying my way.”

  “Are you happy, Maddie? I wished you had come with me right from the start. It was so lonely without you. I thought of writing to you, but so much was happening that I just couldn’t. It wouldn’t have been fair to burden you.”

  “It wasn’t good at first, was it, Erin? He didn’t beat you or anything?”

  “No, nothing like that. But he never gave me any time to tell him about the baby, and that night…” Erin lowered her head, twisting her hands together as the memory crowded her mind. “He was furious when he found out that I lied to him.”

  “And now? He didn’t look like an unhappy man to me. I would know best, wouldn’t I?”

  That brought a smile, then a laugh from Erin. She looked up and saw that the maids had returned and were leaving, but she didn’t bother to get up and lock the door after them.

  She wanted to tell Maddie all that happened, and did, but found that some things were too private to share. With a quiet smile of contentment, Maddie listened, enjoying Erin’s descriptions of Ketch and the other men, her learning to do ranch chores and finding her way with Mace’s children.

  “I know that he loves me, Maddie,” Erin finished. “I dream only of bearing him say the words now. These last months since little Maddie was born have been the best of my life.”

  “Aren’t you glad you didn’t make the choice I once told you was there? Marry a stranger, you said to me. Be something that was bought. Well, it turned out for the best, didn’t it, Erin? You never would have been able to bed half a dozen men a night and turn around to do it again. I knew that the first time I saw you.”

  “I haven’t told Mace. I wanted to explain it all so there would be no more secrets between us, Maddie, but I never told him.”

  “That’s why I wasn’t going to come. And that’s why I think I’ll leave you now.” She handed the baby back to Erin. “She’s a precious child. You see that you take care and love her so she never winds up like me.”

  Erin placed the baby in her cradle and returned to stand in front of Maddie. “I’m not ashamed of you. I don’t want you to leave. Mace will understand.”

  “Erin, you don’t know men as well as me. Don’t bet on that. If this man of yours knew that you worked in a place like Jaffery’s, putting up with stinking drunks pawing you, he’d be gone so fast you couldn’t draw breath. Trust me. I know.”

  “You’re wrong, Maddie. Mace wouldn’t care if I worked upstairs at Jaffery’s. I know he wouldn’t. I told him the truth about the baby. And about losing my position. He believed me.”

  “Why wouldn’t I believe you, Erin? You’re my wife.”

  “Mace!” Erin found it agonizing to look at him standing in the open door that adjoined the rooms. How much had he overheard? And why was he here?

  She moved toward him, praying she would not find contempt in his gaze, but his eyes revealed nothing of what he was feeling or thinking. “I didn’t hear you come in.”

  “Aren’t you going to introduce me, Erin?” he asked instead of answering.

  She turned to gesture Maddie forward, but all the while sensed that he knew exactly who she was. “Mace, this is my friend, Maddie Darling. The one I told you about.”

  “I wish I had known who you were when I saw you at the desk, Maddie. I would have brought you up to see Erin.”

  With a knowing smile, Maddie nodded. “Yes, I have a feeling you would have done just that.”

  “Mace, where are Becky and Jake?” Erin interjected, her feeling that something more was going on between Mace and Maddie puzzling her.

  “They’re down at the bookstore around the corner, looking for a book for you.”

  “You still haven’t told me why you came back.” Erin sent him a pleading look and found he refused to meet her gaze.

  “I had something for you and didn’t want to wait for you to see it.” He then addressed Maddie. “Will you be staying long?”

  “No. I came to make sure that Erin was all right and to see the baby.”

  “And have you?” Mace asked, walking into the room and coming to stand near the cradle. “She’s smart and pretty, isn’t she, Erin?”

  It felt ridiculous to stand there, as Mace went on to brag about the baby, all the while telling herself this was not happening. Mace should by rights be furious—or at the very least, angry. He was neither.

  And what was Maddie doing, going to his side, nodding and listening to every word he said? Erin backed away from them, suddenly afraid that Mace knew what Maddie was. If he had heard them talking about Jaffery, if he thought that she sold herself, she could lose everything that mattered to her.

  Maddie turned to look at her, saw she was upset and hurried to her.

  “I hope I haven’t made trouble for you, Erin. If I have, I’m sorry. I never meant for him to know. I’ll leave—”

  “No, Maddie. You’re the only friend I’ve had. I won’t let Mace chase you off.”

  “He’s not. Believe me, Erin, he’s not. But it’s best that you forget about me.”

  “Why? Why are you telling me this?”

  Taking one of Erin’s hands between hers, Maddie gave a quick shake of her head. “Listen to me. I won’t be in San Francisco for long. My gent and me are going to Santa Fe. He’s been telling me that he’s got a place that needs a woman’s touch. Maybe I’m being foolish, but I believe him. You have a new life here, Erin. You don’t need the likes of me in it.”

  Before Erin answered, Mace came and slipped his arm around her waist. Her rigid posture forced him to plant a kiss on her hair before he spoke to Maddie.

  “Erin told me that you took her in and cared for her when she had no one to turn to.”

  “That’s right, I did. Erin’s a good, hardworking woman. Decent and kind. She deserved better tha
n she had.” Maddie met his hard, direct gaze with one of her own. She was almost of a height with Mace and refused to allow him to intimidate her. “Whatever Erin told you was the truth.”

  “I never said that it wasn’t, Maddie,” Mace answered with a wry smile. “Matter of fact, I don’t understand why you feel you can’t see or write to Erin. She claims you’re her only friend.”

  “The hell you say!” Maddie was ready to take off her kid gloves. “You don’t know what you’re offering and what’s more, you don’t know what I am.”

  “Maddie, please.” Erin turned to look up at Mace. She was angry that he was daring to embarrass Maddie.

  “No, it’s all right, Erin,” Mace said. “I know what Maddie is.” And the look he exchanged with Maddie made sure that she had no doubt he spoke the truth.

  “And you’re still making that offer?” Erin asked. She knew Mace’s pride, and this gesture had been given at its cost. Love, she realized, could keep growing, for hers did for him at this moment. The look he bestowed on her left no doubt that he meant every word. She planted a quick shy kiss on his cheek and freed herself from his light hold.

  “Let me say goodbye to Maddie.”

  “I’ll be waiting, Erin.”

  At the door Maddie leaned close and whispered, “You know what love is now, don’t you?”

  Erin looked at Mace, smiled and nodded.

  “It was the right thing that you did in getting away, Erin. I told you you’d never find love in that place. I’m happy for you. Now keep your fingers crossed for me. Maybe some of that Irish luck will rub off.”

  “It’s not luck of any kind, Maddie. Just love. The giving of love brings its own gifts back to you.”

  With a last hug, Erin let her go, then closed the door. Turning, she faced her husband.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  “You’re not condemning me, Mace? I know you heard us talking. I’m just not sure how much you know.”