Disengaged (Terms of Engagement Book 3)

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Disengaged (Terms of Engagement Book 3) Page 10

by Melissa R. L. Simonin


  “See that mountain?”

  “Yes,” she replied, as he pointed slightly to the left.

  “See where the snow begins?”

  “Yes,” she said again.

  “That’s where we’re going.”

  Erik turned in his seat, and checked on Caleb. The little guy was awfully quiet… considering he was sound asleep, it was completely understandable. Erik watched him for several seconds, then managed a serious expression.

  “He’s a great kid,” he commented.

  “Yeah, he is,” Amber smiled.

  “He needs a dad, though.”

  Amber’s forehead furrowed slightly as she glanced at Erik.

  “He’s got me and Samantha, and Mom and Dad. What does he need a dad, for? Especially when his dad doesn’t care anything about him, anyway.”

  “Don’t say that in front of him, even when you think he’s asleep,” Erik cautioned her firmly. “Maybe you’re right—or maybe you’re not. But I can tell you from experience, that no kid needs to hear it.”

  “That happened to you?” Amber asked, concern filling her blue eyes.

  “Yes. And my brother. So don’t say that. Ever.”

  “Erik, I’m sorry,” Amber apologized, deeply distressed. “I wasn’t thinking. I promise, I won’t say it again.”

  “Alright. Good. I was lucky, I had my older brother. He protected me as much as he could, and diffused those words. They didn’t hurt me like they could have. But he internalized them. I think he’s still being poisoned by those words, and others.”

  “That’s so sad,” Amber said, feeling even worse. She almost felt sorry for Rob.

  Fine, she did feel sorry for him! The little boy who protected his younger brother, and was permanently wounded in the process… how could she not?

  “Yes. It is. We were both lucky, our grandfather is great. He did everything he could to make up for what we were missing. I’m sure your dad is doing that for Caleb. It’s not enough, though. He needs a dad of his own.”

  “So what are you suggesting, Erik? That I find a good candidate, reel him in, and get married?” she asked, trying to hide the sudden gleam of amusement in her eyes.

  Erik looked at her askance. That’s what it looked like to her, anyway.

  “Absolutely not! You’re practically a baby, yourself. I can just imagine the kind of husband you’d pick out, especially considering your track record.”

  There was no way he’d insult Amber that way, if she really was a young, single mom. But she wasn’t. The deeply offended, outraged look on her face was priceless. Especially after the way she had fun at his expense, the day before.

  “There’s more to choosing a guy than looks,” Erik continued. “It’s obvious that was your only criteria in the past.”

  Erik glanced over his shoulder at the sleeping Caleb, for good measure. He maintained his expression of deep concern, in spite of the indignant look in Amber’s eyes.

  She turned her gaze back to the road, then shrugged a little.

  “You’re only saying that because he looks just like you,” she retorted.

  “He does, doesn’t he,” Erik considered.

  Amber saw the opportunity to reclaim the upper hand. And, ensure that their nephew would stay home with his grandparents from now on!

  “Maybe I should spare Caleb and myself the shame, and let people think he’s yours when we’re together.”

  Erik looked thoughtful, rather than mortified.

  “Maybe you’re on to something,” he replied, and she shot him a startled look. “Slow down, Amber, the gas station is right there.”

  Amber tore her eyes off Erik, and placed them back on the road. She turned into the parking lot and parked beside a vacant pump, then turned off the ignition.

  “I need some time to think about this. I’m not willing to commit just yet,” he continued. He looked intently at the mountains in the distance, rather than at her. Otherwise, he had a feeling her expression, whatever it was, would make him laugh. “Taking on the role of father isn’t something to be taken lightly. It shouldn’t be, anyway. So… I’ll consider it.”

  “You’ll… consider what?” she asked cautiously.

  “Becoming Caleb’s father, of course.”

  Other than the tick of the motor, there was absolute silence.

  Erik gave up on Amber breaking it. He glanced at her.

  Amber’s eyes were huge. He enjoyed watching the multitude of emotions that washed in waves across her face.

  “How—how in the world do you intend to do that?”

  “I intend to give it a lot of thought before making a decision, of course. But goodness knows, Caleb needs a dad. I live in Ashland, so it would be a big commitment to make the trip to see him regularly. Or maybe I could relocate… that’s a possibility. I’m going inside to pre-pay. I’ll be back.”

  After he got the laughter out of his system!

  Amber watched him jog to the convenience store, and disappear inside. She realized her jaw was hanging open, and closed it.

  Well… that would be one way to keep seeing Erik after this investigation was over.

  She slumped back in her seat, and wondered if Samantha would mind if she borrowed Caleb now and then.

  Chapter 6

  ROB looked up from the Bible in his hand, and listened. The sound of the howling wind, and the rattle of icy snow against the side of the cabin, he was used to. This was different, and it came from the living room.

  He used the notepad to hold his place in the Bible, then went to the bedroom door and opened it quietly. If she was still asleep…

  Samantha swayed, and clutched the back of the recliner to steady herself. She was focused on remaining on her feet, and didn’t see Rob.

  “Let me help you,” he said, as he crossed the floor to reach her.

  The sound of his voice startled her, and she flinched. She shot him an apprehensive look and shivered, but said nothing.

  “Please, let me help you. I promise, Samantha, I’ll never hurt you again,” he vowed, as he put his arm around her, using his hands to support her elbows. “Let me do something for you. Where are you trying to go, what do you need?”

  “Bathroom,” she said grudgingly, her voice raw.

  He glanced at the fireplace as he slowly guided her in the right direction. It could use another couple of logs.

  “Are you warm enough?” he asked. After being shut in the bedroom for the past few hours, the main cabin area felt extremely warm to him. That didn’t mean it was comfortable for her.

  The room suddenly dimmed, as the lights on the end tables and the pocket lights in the kitchen flickered, then went out. Samantha looked up apprehensively, and Rob hurried to assure her. “Give it another second. The backup generator will kick in.”

  Light returned, and she relaxed a little.

  “It’s happened a few times since we got here,” he added. “But it’s nothing to worry about. The worst that can happen is that the appliance clocks will need reset.”

  Samantha said nothing in reply. Rob saw her safely inside the bathroom, then waited for her outside the door. When she was ready, he helped her back to the couch.

  “Would you rather be in the bedroom?” he asked, but she shook her head. She sank into the couch with a sigh of exhaustion, and pulled the blankets up around her shoulders.

  “Are you warm enough?” he asked gently, and she shook her head a little.

  Rob immediately added logs to the fireplace, and turned up the thermostat. He warmed one of the blankets, then tucked it around her.

  “Is that better?” he asked, as she shivered a little.

  “Feels like my bones are frozen.”

  “They just about were,” he said, remorse darkening his eyes. He tucked the blanket more snugly around her. “Can I get you anything? You look like you’re in pain.”

  “Back hurts,” she winced.

  “I’ll be right back,” he replied.

  He disappeared inside the bedr
oom, and returned almost immediately with another pillow. He held it in front of the fire until it was thoroughly warmed.

  “Roll toward me a little,” he directed. She understood his intent, and forced her aching muscles to do so. Rob tucked the hot pillow underneath the blankets, and she leaned back against it with a sigh of relief. The tension in her face eased.

  “It’s not as good as a heating pad, but… I’ll warm it for you again, when it cools off.”

  She nodded slightly, then closed her eyes.

  “You need to drink,” Rob said quickly. “Do you want tea? I’ll make you some.”

  She shook her head a little.

  “Then unless you have a preference, I’m giving you more water,” he warned her. She didn’t respond, so he assisted her in sitting up, and reached for the water bottle on the coffee table. He had a feeling she drank just to get rid of him, but… she did drink, that was the main thing.

  “How about food? We’ve got several options, and you can’t afford not to eat. You don’t have any stores to draw on.”

  “You would know,” she said hoarsely, giving him an indignant glare. Much to her surprise, he blushed a little.

  “It was either get you out of your snow-packed clothes, or have you freeze to death right here in the cabin.”

  Her eyes darkened, and she looked away.

  “I know you’re wondering why I didn’t just let you,” he blurted out, and tears pooled in her eyes. “I was a monster, I know it. All I ever gave you were reasons not to trust me. I was worse than stupid, I was mean and cruel, and did the opposite of everything I should’ve done. I made everything as difficult for you as I could. I gave you every reason to think I hated you. I might as well have, for all the good it did you. The truth hit me hard when I thought my pride and anger cost you your life. I’ve thought… I’ve thought a lot of crazy things over the past several years. I don’t know how I could ever believe any of it. You deserve the best I have to give, and that’s not what I gave you. I’m so sorry, Samantha. So sorry.”

  She swallowed hard and tears spilled onto her cheeks, as she closed her eyes tightly. Rob brushed away his own tears, and knelt on the floor beside her.

  “I was so messed up. I said and did the opposite of everything I wanted to. When I saw you yesterday, I wanted to beg you to come back to me. Instead, I was mean to you. I said I wanted your rings back, and that I was glad you were out of my life. I’m not glad, I’ve never been glad. I’ve missed you every single second since you left.”

  “Why are you telling me this?” Samantha sobbed roughly. “Why?”

  “Because it’s the truth, and I’m done with lies. When I imagined seeing you again, I pictured myself hugging you close, and never letting go. I imagined saying I love you, and you telling me the same thing. And instead, I said everything I could to hurt you. It’s like there were two sides to me, and the worst side always drowned out everything good. Then I thought I lost you forever, and I knew it was all my fault. We could’ve been together the past two years, like I wanted us to be, but I was my own worst enemy. I was our enemy. But I’m not anymore. Please let me prove that to you.”

  “No!” she sobbed, her throat tightening, as memories besieged her. “Stop talking! I can’t take anymore!”

  “Okay, I’m sorry,” Rob said, sobbing with her. “I’m so sorry.”

  He wanted to shut himself in the bedroom again and read what that guy Paul said, about Jesus using him as an example of how patient God was with even the worst of sinners, but first he warmed the bedroom’s other pillow. He used it to replace the one behind her back, then took the top blanket and held it in front of the fire until it was thoroughly warm. He tucked it around her. She wasn’t crying as hard now, and she didn’t pull away when he touched her. Maybe she was falling asleep.

  “I’ll be back in an hour and make you some stew,” he said gently. “If you need me… I won’t be far away.”

  Rob turned and went back inside the bedroom and quietly shut the door behind him.

  ERIK reached the safety of the convenience store. He ducked out of sight of the windows, then allowed himself a minute to laugh. Any more than that, and he’d risk discovery by Amber, should she decide to follow him inside.

  He wiped the tears from his eyes, took a deep breath, and smiled back at the girl behind the register, who looked like she’d appreciate being let in on the joke.

  Erik selected drinks from the case, and picked up snacks on the way down the aisle to the register. A small section of toys caught his eye, and he was pleased to see a toy car that was fit for a child under the age of two. He carried it, and his other purchases to the register.

  “Will this be all?” the girl asked, giving him a curious look.

  “I’d also like to put thirty on pump three,” he replied. He glanced toward the wall of glass that faced the pumps and parking lot. He couldn’t tell if Amber switched places yet, or not. He turned back to the register, and something caught his eye.

  Beside him on the counter sat a small display rack, hung with colorful necklace and earring sets. It was costume jewelry, cheap and rubbery in texture, and it was perfect. He choked back another laugh as he rapidly spun the rack and made his selection.

  “This, too,” he said, as he handed it over. “Do you have scissors?”

  “Yes,” the girl answered in surprise.

  “Great,” Erik said, inserting his credit card in the chip reader. He picked up the cardboard square that held the necklace, and cut it so that was all it held. He handed the earrings to the girl. “Keep them or toss them, the necklace is all I want.”

  “Okay,” the girl replied, slowly setting them aside. “She doesn’t have pierced ears?”

  “No, she does,” he smiled back at her.

  “Well… I guess both would be kind of overkill,” the girl said, as she handed Erik his receipt.

  “Yeah, you could say that,” Erik said, and laughed.

  The girl laughed too, although she had no idea why that was funny.

  “Thanks,” Erik said, then focused on composing himself. By the time he finished returning his card to his wallet, his wallet to his pocket, put the receipt in the bag, and took the bag in his hand, he was ready to face Amber again.

  “Have a nice day,” the girl called after him.

  “You too,” he smiled, and leaving the convenience store behind, he returned to his vehicle.

  Amber was in the passenger seat now, so he walked around to the driver’s side and proceeded to fill up his SUV’s tank.

  The snow of Ocotillo was left behind long ago, but in spite of it, he’d freeze if he was standing there without a coat. The thought of Samantha nearly freezing to death while Rob looked out for himself, filled him with sadness, but… not as one who had no hope. There was never more reason to hope than there was now.

  Erik replaced the gas nozzle and the gas cap, then took his place in the driver’s seat.

  “Took you long enough,” Amber said cheerfully. She appeared to have her equilibrium back.

  “I take it you missed me,” he replied to Amber, and smiled back at Caleb, as the little boy jabbered something to him. “We’ll be there soon, we don’t have much further to go. And here, I got you something.”

  Erik rummaged in the bag he held, and removed the toy car. Caleb clapped his hands together, and talked excitedly.

  “That’s so sweet,” Amber said, helping to unwind the twist-ties that held it to the packaging.

  “Does he drink juice?” Erik wondered.

  “Sometimes,” Amber replied.

  “I got him some of that too, just in case. And some snacks. I know you like Cheerios, don’t you, Caleb,” Erik said. “Do I give him the box?”

  “If you want them all out of it as soon as possible,” she warned him, taking the single serving size container. “I’ll dole them out.”

  “Great. I also got snacks and drinks for us,” he said, placing the bottles of soda in the console’s drink holders, and the bag of
snacks on top. “I got something else for you, too. It didn’t seem fair to give one of you something, and not the other, so…”

  Erik held out his hand, and Amber watched in surprise as he opened it.

  She stared, and he managed to look innocent. She raised an eyebrow, then looked at him. There was a gleam of… something… in her eyes.

  “Thank you, Erik. It’s lovely. Were they all out of scarlet?”

  “I thought purple was your favorite color,” he said, his forehead furrowing in concern. “I can go back, maybe they have red…”

  They did have red. But that, would be overkill. And could get him killed.

  “That won’t be necessary,” she said. She fastened the cord around her neck, from which hung the purple letter A. She glanced at him sideways. “I’ll wear it with pride.”

  “I’m touched,” he replied, as if he had no idea she was trying to turn the tables and mortify him over what he’d unwittingly insinuated by giving her the letter A to wear. How fortuitous it was that he could play ignorant so convincingly. How perfect it was that her name started with that letter!

  “You know there’s a book about a scarlet letter,” she informed him, a suspicious gleam in her eyes.

  “Is that why you’d rather have a red one? Because I can easily go back…”

  She gave up on him, and rolled her eyes a little.

  “I like purple better. And how did you know that?”

  “You told me. Your sister chose purple for the bridesmaid dresses, and you were glad, because it was your favorite color,” he said, as he pulled out of the parking lot and back onto the road.

  “I can’t believe you remember that!”

  “You like Dr. Pepper, too. Or you did,” he replied, and she glanced at the drink in the cup holder nearest her.

  “How—how do you know that?” she asked in amazement.

  “Why else would you drink that at our brother’s and sister’s wedding? You made a horrible face and a gagging sound, when the server refilled your glass with Pepsi. I still remember the lecture you gave the guy,” he smiled, and she laughed.

  “Good grief, that was like… five years ago! Did you get straight A’s in school?”

 

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