Alfie the Werewolf 3: Silvertooth

by Paul van Loon

  Mum undid her seat belt and got out of the car to study the poo more closely. It was shaped like an arrow and it pointed straight into the forest.

  ‘Impressive,’ Mum mumbled. ‘Leo’s got talent. OK, everyone get out.’

  Tim looked at her with surprise. ‘What are we going to do, Mum?’

  ‘We’re going to walk. If Alfie is being held captive in this forest, we have to look for him quietly. A car would be much too noisy.’

  ‘You’re a smart woman,’ said Grandpa Werewolf. ‘If I was fifty years younger, I wouldn’t think twice.’

  Mum giggled for a second, then led them into the forest. Fortunately the full moon was shining through the branches to light the way.

  ‘Where are Dad and Leo?’ Tim asked.

  Mum laid a hand on his shoulder. ‘I bet we bump into them any moment now.’

  They followed the path deeper into the forest. Suddenly a voice called out, ‘Hello, who’s there?’ There were figures moving in the moonlight. A little bit further along they could make out the dark shape of a large lorry.

  ‘Grandpa Werewolf, get back,’ Mum whispered and right away the old werewolf slipped into the bushes.

  ‘Who’s there?’

  Two men appeared. One was wearing a brown suit and a brown hat and carrying a case. The other had grey hair and glasses with reflective lenses.

  ‘Mum, that’s the guy you told off at the crossing,’ Tim said.

  ‘I see that too, son. Just act like you’re a babe in the woods.’

  ‘But, Mum, they’ll see I’m not a baby.’

  ‘Shhh, Tim, quiet.’

  A torch shone full into Mum and Tim’s faces.

  ‘Would you please shine that light somewhere else!’ Mum snapped in her strictest voice.

  ‘Oh, beg your pardon, ma’am.’

  The beam of light went down to the ground.

  ‘Hello,’ said the man with the reflective glasses. ‘I am Dr Cutter. This is Mr Frogley of the RCUPA.’

  Mum gulped. ‘The RCUPA? The Reception Centre for Unusual People and Animals?’

  ‘Precisely,’ said Dr Cutter. He gave Mum a probing look from over the top of his glasses. One of his eyes was all white, without a pupil.

  What a creep, thought Tim.

  ‘Don’t I know you from somewhere, ma’am?’

  Mum coughed and shook her head. ‘Not as far as I know.’

  ‘Hmmm, then it must have been someone else, someone who looked like you.’ Dr Cutter ran his fingers through his grey hair. ‘Do you know your way around this forest? You see, we seem to be lost.’

  ‘Oh?’ Mum smiled innocently. ‘What are you doing here?’

  Dr Cutter hesitated for a second. ‘Um … We’re here to pick up some special … er, animal species. In a manner of speaking. We have an appointment with Mr. Silvertooth. His Menagerie of Extraordinary Creatures is somewhere in this forest. Mr Frogley here is a purchaser for collectors and I’m a researcher.’

  ‘Oh? And what exactly does a researcher do?’

  Dr Cutter cackled with laughter. ‘Well, I’m a kind of surgeon. I do operations. I have some very sharp scalpels.’

  Tim felt a shiver run down his spine. He squeezed his mother’s hand. Then he picked a sturdy branch up off the ground and put it in his mother’s other hand behind her back. She squeezed his hand in reply.

  ‘But I don’t want to bore you any longer,’ Dr Cutter said. ‘Do you know which way we have to go to find the menagerie?’

  Mum smiled a cold-blooded smile. ‘You’re right. You don’t want to bore me any longer. And you won’t.’ She swung the thick branch up over her head like a club. Tim dived at Mr Frogley’s legs. And suddenly Grandpa Werewolf came roaring out of the bushes.

  Unfortunately, he stumbled and fell on his nose.

  30

  Nutcase

  Alfie gripped the bars with two paws. Panting with surprise, he watched the net swing back and forth high in the tree.

  ‘Did you see that, Noura? Did you see those two people walk into that trap? That net shot up like a rocket as if it was attached to elastic cables, and the next moment it was up in the tree. Valentine said that Silvertooth has got traps all over the place. We’re just lucky it wasn’t Tim and his father.’

  ‘Who are those two?’ asked Noura.

  Alfie shrugged. ‘Collectors, I think, one with a funny hat and one with a cap. I’m not sure though. I didn’t get a good look at them. I’m glad they got caught in the trap though.’

  Valentine crept back out from his dark corner and peered at the net. ‘They’re no collectors.’

  Alfie frowned at Valentine. ‘How do you know?’

  ‘Because one of them’s a wolf. A big one. Your kind of wolf.’

  ‘A big werewolf? Are you sure?’

  ‘Yep,’ said Valentine. ‘We vampires have super sharp eyes.’ He squinted and looked again. ‘And another very strange character. Someone with a flowerpot on his head. He’s wearing a diving mask and he’s got blue hair. What a nutcase!’

  Alfie looked at Noura. ‘Blue hair?’

  ‘A flowerpot and a diving mask?’ said Noura.

  They looked at each other and growled, ‘Tim’s dad!’ at exactly the same time.

  Silvertooth stormed out of his shack with his cigar in his mouth and his gun under one arm. He ran over to the tree and looked up at the net. His catch was still wriggling. A snarling and growling sound came from the net.

  ‘Aha,’ Silvertooth cried. ‘I thought I heard something. A fine haul by the looks of things. Yet another werewolf. It’s good werewolf weather, tonight. The collectors will be overjoyed.’ He screwed up his eyes. ‘But what’s that other one? It’s not a werewolf. But it does look like an extraordinary creature. Blue hair, big strange eyes, a furry coat. Maybe it’s a bug-eyed blue-crested nincompoop. They’re mega-rare.’

  ‘Lets us out, Silvertoothache!’ Leo roared. ‘Leo eats you ups and spits you out.’

  Alfie looked at Noura. ‘It’s Leo,’ he growled. ‘Leo and Tim’s father.’

  Silvertooth gave a loud laugh. ‘No werewolf can harm me, big mouth. And you’re so stupid you walked straight into my trap. What a fool!’

  Suddenly they heard the sound of an engine and wheels spinning. Lights appeared behind the trees. A big lorry was driving straight through the undergrowth and ploughing through the sand. It jolted and bounced ever closer, then stopped with the engine still roaring.

  The engine died and the lights dimmed. Then the door swung open. An old man in a white coat climbed out carefully. His hair was grey and he was wearing reflective glasses that caught the moonlight.

  31

  A Blue-Crested Nincompoop

  ‘Who’s that?’ whispered Alfie.

  Growling softly, Noura walked circles inside her cage. ‘A creep.’

  Valentine crept forward and wrapped his fingers around the bars. ‘A researcher,’ he said with a quavering voice. ‘They always look like that. Researchers have white coats. Usually with bloodstains on them. Now we’ve really had it.’ Moaning, he crawled back into the shadows at the rear of his cage.

  In the cage next to his, the Scoffle woke up with a screech.

  Someone else got out of the lorry: brown suit, brown felt hat.

  Silvertooth walked up, holding out his hand. ‘Dr Cutter?’

  The old man nodded and shook Silvertooth’s hand.

  ‘Excellent. Then you must be Mr Frogley.’

  The other man just nodded.

  Silvertooth pointed to the cages. ‘Let’s not waste any time. Come this way.’

  The two visitors followed along behind Silvertooth, stopping in front of Alfie’s cage.

  ‘This is the werewolf for you, Dr Cutter. A magnificent specimen.’

  Suddenly the Scoffle screeched. Its box shook back and forth. Silvertooth turned a furious red. ‘Thunderation! Why don’t you just shut up for once, you horrible creature?’ He stuck his gun in through the bars and gave the Scoffle a few hard whacks
that made it screech again, loudly, then fall silent.

  Alfie felt sorry for the Scoffle, even though he’d never seen it.

  Silvertooth hung the gun over his shoulder. ‘Sorry, doctor. That creature is extremely troublesome. Violence is all it understands and no one wants to buy it off me.’ He kicked the box. ‘But that’s not what we’re here for. We’re here to talk about this werewolf.’

  Dr Cutter looked at Alfie. Alfie stared back at the long wrinkled face with white sideburns. Dr Cutter didn’t look mean at all. He actually looked friendly. For a moment he even seemed to be smiling at him. But his eyes stayed hidden behind the reflective glasses.

  What a treacherous smile! thought Alfie, baring his teeth and growling.

  ‘Lovely, lovely,’ mumbled Dr Cutter.

  Silvertooth banged Alfie’s cage. ‘You can do as much research on him as you like, cut him open or whatever. And that’s not all.’ He raised a finger in the air and grinned. His silver teeth flashed in the moonlight. ‘It’s your lucky day, Dr Cutter. Look what I’ve got here,’ he said, walking over to the next cage.

  Noura was too scared to look up at the strange doctor.

  ‘Another werewolf,’ Silvertooth said. ‘A black one, a female. I’ll throw her in extra for half price.’

  Alfie hurled himself against his bars, growling and snarling. ‘Leave Noura alone, you crooks.’

  Silvertooth grinned. ‘A plucky little werewolf, as you see. What do you say, Dr Cutter?’

  The old man nodded. ‘Um, yes, of course. The more werewolves the better. I can do lots of lovely operations.’

  Silvertooth chuckled. ‘But wait. Wait! I’ve got something else for you. Something very special.’ He pointed up. ‘Look up there! A whopping great werewolf that I just trapped a minute ago.

  ‘He’s yours too, if you’d like him. And I’ll throw in that Extraordinary Creature next to him as a free bonus. It’s a bug-eyed blue-crested nincompoop.’

  Up in the air, Leo growled. He slashed with his claws and lashed out with his legs, making the net dance dangerously in the air.

  ‘Take it easy, Leo,’ Dad whispered. ‘You’re not an acrobat. If you’re not careful, we’ll fall down.’

  Dr Cutter rubbed his hands together. ‘Fantastic! Three werewolves and a blue-crested nincompoop. The more creatures the better. Load them into the lorry.’

  Suddenly Mr Frogley started to cough. He’d choked on something when he looked up.

  With a contented expression on his face, Silvertooth lit a cigar. ‘Fine. Just drive the lorry over here.’

  Alfie looked at Noura, who was sitting hunched up in a corner. He could see that she was trembling. ‘Don’t give up, Noura,’ he growled. ‘We’re going to be rescued. I just don’t know how.’

  Alfie was trying hard to sound brave, but inside he didn’t feel brave at all. Things were looking more and more hopeless. If only Tim was here, he thought. He’d be sure to come up with a good plan.

  Mr Frogley walked over to the lorry.

  ‘Wait, wait,’ shouted Silvertooth.

  Mr Frogley looked back. ‘Is there something else?’

  ‘You are taking the vampire too?’ Silvertooth pointed at Valentine’s cage.

  Mr Frogley swallowed. ‘A vampire?’

  ‘Of course,’ Silvertooth said. ‘That was the agreement. You were picking him up for a collector who wanted a stuffed vampire.’

  Mr Frogley coughed. ‘Oh yes, that’s right. I almost forgot.’

  ‘It doesn’t matter,’ Valentine cried out in a frightened voice. ‘I’ll stay here if you don’t want to take me. I’d be very difficult to stuff.’

  Mr Frogley seemed to think for a moment, then shook his head. ‘No, I’d better take you too.’

  Alfie had been listening carefully the whole time and it was if his blood was tingling through his veins. There was something about Mr Frogley’s voice. He knew that voice. He was sure of it.

  Suddenly he heard a sound behind him.

  Pssst, Alfie.’

  Surprised, Alfie looked over his shoulder.

  There was someone on the other side of his cage, hidden behind a bush.

  32

  To the Rescue

  ‘Tim!’ Alfie whispered, but he was so excited his whisper was too loud. Quickly Silvertooth looked in his direction.

  Oops, thought Alfie, he might see Tim. Alfie had recognized Tim by the hair sticking up over the bush. Just then Dr Cutter started coughing loudly.

  Silvertooth turned back to the doctor. ‘Is my cigar bothering you?’

  Still coughing, Dr Cutter shook his head.

  Silvertooth patted him on the back. ‘Shall we get down to business then, doctor?’

  They took a few steps away from the cages.

  Even though Alfie was overjoyed to have Tim so close at hand, he was still too scared to move a millimetre.

  ‘Don’t look back,’ Tim whispered. ‘We’ve come to rescue you.’

  ‘I’ve still got your favourite bear, Tim. I knew you’d come.’ Tears leapt into Alfie’s eyes. ‘Noura, I told you, didn’t I? We’re going to be rescued. Tim is here.’

  Noura did her best to look back without being noticed and when she saw Tim, her eyes gleamed. Valentine saw him now too.

  ‘Who’s that?’ he hissed to Alfie.

  ‘That’s Tim, my best friend. He’s come to rescue us.’

  ‘Oh, great!’ Valentine groaned. ‘Now his friend’s come to rescue him too.’

  ‘Tim,’ Noura said under her breath. ‘How are you going to rescue us?’

  Tim crawled a bit closer to the cages. He had pulled a bush out of the ground and was holding it up in front of him. ‘Mum is disguised as Mr Frogley.’

  Alfie growled softly. ‘I knew it! I recognized her voice.’

  ‘And you see Dr Cutter? You’ll never guess who that is.’

  Alfie looked at the cruel doctor. ‘Who?’

  ‘Grandpa Werewolf.’

  ‘What?’ Just in time Alfie clapped a hairy paw over his mouth. ‘How can he be, Tim?’

  Tim rustled his bush softly. ‘Mum knocked them both out. You should have seen it. And Grandpa took on human form again for the first time in ten years. Just to rescue you, Alfie.’

  Alfie swallowed.

  ‘But he can’t keep it up for long,’ Tim said. ‘He could turn back into a wolf any moment, so we have to hurry.’

  Mr Frogley manoeuvred the lorry very carefully in between the cages. ‘There, we can load ’em up.’

  Silvertooth chuckled approvingly. ‘I hope you’re satisfied, Dr Cutter. I’m sure we’ll be able to do business again in the future.’

  In its cage the Scoffle growled ominously.

  ‘Shut up, beast.’ Silvertooth kicked its box, then looked back at Dr Cutter. The doctor’s nose seemed to have grown a little. There was more hair on his face too and his ears were a little pointier.

  ‘Are you feeling all right, doctor? You suddenly look a little … different.’

  Dr Cutter shook his head. ‘I’m right as rain. Let’s go. Load those cages.’

  Suddenly they heard voices. Two men emerged from the bushes. They were in their underwear, stumbling and leaning on each other for support.

  ‘Oh, no,’ groaned Tim behind his bush.

  ‘What is it?’ said Alfie. ‘Who are they?’

  Tim groaned again. ‘They’re the real Dr Cutter and Mr Frogley.’

  33

  Impostors!

  The two men were shivering. Their bare arms and legs were blue from the cold and covered with goosebumps.

  High in the air, Leo kicked and roared in the net. The branch they were dangling from bent lower and lower.

  ‘Take it easy, Leo,’ Tim’s father moaned. ‘It hurts every time you move.’

  He was bent double with one knee under his chin. The cords of the net pressed his nose flat and cut into his cheeks. His right ear was folded forward. He peered out of the corner of his eye through the diving mask. ‘What’s happening
down there? Who are those two men in their underwear?’

  Leo wasn’t listening. He tugged on the net and wriggled and bit it harder and harder, but just got more and more tangled.

  Meanwhile Silvertooth had turned his gun on the men. ‘Who are you? What are you doing here?’

  The men pointed at Mum and Grandpa, who were still in disguise.

  ‘Im-p-p-postors!’ they stuttered in chorus.

  The older man had grey hair and one white pupil-less eye. The other one had an enormous bump on his forehead.

  ‘Th-those two are imp-p-p-postors. They stole my g-g-glasses. And our c-c-clothes.’

  Silvertooth looked at the lorry with astonishment. Mum and Grandpa smiled and shrugged.

  ‘Two shivering charlatans in their smalls,’ Mum said in her Mr Frogley voice. ‘Free-range loonies.’

  ‘L-l-lies!’ shouted the old man. ‘We’re C-C-C-Cutter and F-f-frogley. Th-th-they attacked us! They even stole our t-t-t-t-trousers.’ He rubbed his cold blue arms. ‘U-use your eyes! Th-the old one’s not even hu-hu-human. He’s a w-w-werewolf too. And the other one’s a l-l-l-l-lady. She c-c-c-clubbed us with a b-b-b-branch.’

  The cigar fell out of Silvertooth’s mouth. ‘What?’

  Again the Scoffle growled in its cage.

  ‘A werewolf?’ cried Silvertooth, quickly jabbing his gun in between the bars. The Scoffle snorted furiously, then fell silent.

  ‘Ooh, now we’re in for it,’ Tim said. ‘Grandpa Werewolf can’t keep it up much longer.’

  Silvertooth had noticed now too. Snorting with rage he strode over to the fake Dr Cutter. The doctor’s face had changed. He now had a hairy muzzle and pointy ears. The reflective glasses fell to the ground.

  ‘A-ha!’ Silvertooth roared. ‘Impostor, you’re not Cutter! Now I see. I know you from the old days. I should have blown you away then. Don’t think you can make a monkey out of me, old werewolf.’ He pointed his gun at Grandpa. ‘I think I’ll shoot some nice holes in you right now.’

  ‘Run, Grandpa, run!’ Alfie screamed. He threw himself against the bars but they were too strong.