My Kind of Love

by Jill Sanders

  He’d jumped on the bike and ridden out to her farm, thinking she wouldn’t be there but secretly hoping she would.

  Now, taking a deep breath, he nodded to the llama and decided to change the subject. The llama, for its part, walked up to him and laid its head on his shoulder as he scratched the spot between its ears.

  “One of the reasons I moved back to Pride was because of my mother,” he started. When she remained silent, he turned towards her.

  She was looking at him as if he’d just done something shocking.

  “What?” he asked. The llama leaned in when he stopped scratching its head.

  “How—? Bert doesn’t like anyone.” She crossed her arms over her chest. “She’s been here a year and all she does is spit, kick, and bite anyone who tries to get close to her.”

  “Who is Bert?” He chuckled when the llama butted his head and nibbled on his shoulder.

  “That”—she motioned to the llama— “is Bert. You’ve practically got her crawling into your arms.”

  He chuckled. “What kind of name is Bert for a female llama?” He wrapped his arms around the soft white-and-brown-speckled neck and pressed his face next to its ear. “You just haven’t found the right person, huh?” he joked. Then he turned to Carrie. “Maybe she prefers Berta?” The llama rubbed her head against his. “See.” He laughed and continued to give the animal his attention.

  “What about your mother?” she finally asked, and he turned away from the affectionate beast.

  “She’s had some… security issues lately.”

  “Your dad?” Carrie knew his history, all of it. She had been the only person he’d trusted with the gritty details of his abusive father, of growing up watching what happened to his mother, brother, and sister when they got out of line. Hell, he’d taken more punches than most of them. He’d even asked for them a few times to save his mother or sister from the pain.

  “I’m not sure. It’s the reason I started Internal Security.” He shrugged as he remembered sitting at a computer after his mother called him and told him someone had cleaned out her savings account. He’d been a fry cook at a greasy diner in LA, barely making enough to pay for the shithole studio apartment he’d rented just down the street. His future hadn’t looked good—until he’d learned he was great at hunting down the bad guys on the internet.

  It had taken him less than a week to figure out how his mother’s account had been hacked. It hadn’t gotten her money back, but at least he’d started down a new path.

  He’d spent all his free time learning about online security, banking security, email security, all kinds of personal online security. He’d started his own business, paid for the license, and set up an account. He’d had a huge break when he’d cracked one a huge case by chance.

  “What kind of issues?” Carrie asked, breaking into his memories.

  “She had some money go missing last year, and lately, someone’s been stalking her. Breaking into her place while she’s at work, leaving things.”

  “Has she talked to my dad?” she asked as she started walking towards the farm house that sat on the front of the property.

  “Yes, a few times.”

  “And?” She stopped and turned towards him.

  “There’s only so much a small-town cop can do.” He held up his hands. “No offense, but the law can’t do anything unless they have proof it was my dad.”

  “And proving that is your job?” she asked, tilting her head.

  “It is, she’s my mother.” He glanced around her place, immediately thinking of the security she needed. For the last year, it had become his life.

  “What about being a world-famous chef?” she asked, stepping up onto her front porch. An old dog was lying by the front door and slowly got up and walked over to them. She sat down on the step and let the dog lay its head in her lap.

  For as long as he could remember, there had been a dog alongside Carrie.

  “Where’s Bo?” he asked, looking around.

  She frowned. “Bo died two months after you left.” There was a slight bite to her tone.

  “I’m sorry.” He sighed and sat next to her to scratch the old dog’s head. “Who’s this?”

  “DeWalt.” She chuckled. “He came with the name. I call him D for short.”

  “He’s pretty old.”

  “Which is why he’s on the porch and not out for adoption. He’s too old. He was one of my first rescues.” She scratched the dog’s head. “So, he stays with me.” She glanced over at him. “You didn’t answer my question. What happened to you becoming a chef?”

  “Life got in the way.” He shrugged. “What happened to you becoming a ballerina?”

  “You know what happened. At my first class, everyone discovered that I’m a klutz.” She rolled her eyes.

  He chuckled. “It’s one of the first things I liked about you.” He leaned his back against the railing of the porch as the old dog rolled over to get his belly scratched by him. “I remember seeing you trip doing hopscotch. You fell and skinned your knee.” His smile fell slightly as the memory played in his mind. “You didn’t even cry,” he said softly.

  It had surprised him that a girl with a raw and bleeding knee hadn’t even shed a tear. It touched him so because every time his father slapped him or pinched him, tears would roll down his own cheeks. If a girl didn’t cry when she was bleeding, why did he cry when he wasn’t? He’d made it his mission after that day to watch her closely and learn as much as he could from her.

  “What was I, thirteen?” she joked.

  He frowned at her. “No, you were probably five at the time,” he answered truthfully.

  Her eyebrows shot up. “Five? You didn’t…” She shook her head. “You remember me when I was five?”

  His eyes moved to hers and held. How could he tell her how long he’d watched her, cared about her? Why tell her now and open old wounds? So instead of saying all the things he wanted to, he shrugged and turned his attention back to the dog.

  “Josh.” Her hand on his arm stopped him and he glanced back up. “Why are you back?” She held up her hand to stop his first response. “The truth.”

  He sighed and looked around at the life she’d built. He was flooded with jealousy. “For this.” He motioned to the dark yard and held in his other answer. For you.

  Chapter 4

  Carrie was running late. The old truck wouldn’t start today. Something had probably broken loose on the last rescue mission, so she’d had to shove a couple bales of hay into the trunk of her car and drive it out to the far field to give Brownie, Chester, Rudy, Scratch, and Itchy breakfast. The horses she was currently boarding were always a pleasure to take care of. Two of them were rescues that had found a new home already but the new owners, Ryan and Ann Ravage, were waiting until their new barn was finished before picking them up.

  After dealing with all the animals during her normal morning routine, she showered quickly. When she went to pull on her uniform, she discovered that she’d forgotten to wash the blouse, which still had stains on it. Searching the back part of her closet, she found a shirt that was cleaner than the other one and pulled it on just as her phone buzzed.

  “Where are you?” Riley hissed into the phone.

  “Late,” she said, tucking the phone between her ear and her shoulder as she hunted for her other boot.

  “Mason’s here and I think he’s waiting to talk to you.” Riley’s voice was muffled.

  “I’m coming,” She groaned. “If I can ever find…” Her fingertips touched the boot under her bed and she smiled. “Got it.”

  “Well, hurry up. He looks like he has something to tell you and I don’t think he’s going to wait around long.”

  Carrie rolled her eyes when the phone went dead. Riley had a way of exaggerating. Still, she doubled her efforts to get out the door.

  She walked into the Golden Oar ten minutes after the lunch hour rush started. There was a line out the front door and when she entered the back, Iian’s
dark eyebrows rose as he glanced down at his watch.

  “Don’t start,” she signed to him. Iian was deaf, and one of her father’s best friends, so she’d spent all of her life around the man and had picked up American Sign Language long before she knew how to spell most words.

  “Problems?” he signed back.

  “Truck wouldn’t start.” She punched the touchscreen computer and clocked herself into the new system.

  “I’ll have Jacob stop by and take a look at it.” He pulled out his cell phone and texted his son. Jacob was the complete opposite of his twin, Riley. Where Riley was outgoing and popular, Jacob was the quiet brooding type. Jacob was just like his dad. Connor, the oldest of Iian’s three kids, took after Iian and Allison—determined, self-motivated, and outgoing with a hint of Iian’s brooding style.

  “Thanks,” she signed when Iian looked back up.

  “Don’t thank me, you know the rules.” He smiled. “Have fun taking the trash out tonight.”

  She groaned and rolled her eyes for show, then spun on her heels and got to work.

  Riley found her just before she exited the kitchen. Her friend gripped her arm almost painfully.

  “I was wrong, Mason doesn’t want to talk to you. I can take your section…”

  She stopped her friend. “It’s okay, there is nothing between us.” She almost laughed.

  Riley’s shoulders fell. “Why not?”

  She shrugged. “There wasn’t a spark.” She turned and stepped out into the dining area.

  Just as she suspected from Riley’s actions, Mason sat at a table near the windows with a young blonde woman. From across the room, she could feel the sparks shooting off between the couple.

  Placing on her best “I don’t care that I don’t have someone in my life like that” smile, she made her way across the room.

  For the rest of her shift, her mind pondered over why relationships were so hard. It kept gnawing at her that, with Josh, everything had been smooth. They had fit together so well, she’d never had to work at being with him.

  Last night had been the same. Even though she was still pissed, having him at her place felt… right. Kicking herself for those thoughts, she tried to focus on her work.

  When it was closing time, she spent extra time cleaning up, knowing she had to wait until everyone was done before she hauled the trash out to the dumpster behind the restaurant. It was punishment for being late. Not that it was a big job, but everyone knew that whoever got stuck with it must have been late.

  She had just tossed the last bag into the large dumpster behind the fenced-in area when she smelled smoke. Walking around, she jumped slightly when she noticed a man leaning against the corner of the fence less than two feet from her.

  “You didn’t waste time slumming it again with my son.” The last two words out of Kevin William’s mouth were spit out, telling her exactly what the man thought of his son.

  Shutting the gate behind her and securing the latch, she took her time replying to him. She’d learned how to deal with Josh’s father long ago, but the man still creeped her out.

  “I’m not seeing your son.” She stepped around him, but he threw his hand out, gripping her upper arm in a tight hold.

  When she tried to jerk herself free, his fingers tightened painfully as he moved closer to her. His breath reeked of cigarettes and alcohol and she coiled back slightly. As she moved, his smile grew, and she kicked herself mentally for allowing him to get to her.

  “What is it you want?” she hissed and once again jerked her arm until he finally let go of her.

  “I want a lot of things, missy.” He tossed his cigarette over the fence towards the trash bin. Worry flooded her that the bin would catch fire.

  Kevin stepped closer until he was a breath from her. This time, she held her ground and raised her chin slightly.

  “You think you’re too good for us, you and your kind. I know what will happen if he comes sniffing around you again. Your old man can be a pain in my ass.” His eyes narrowed. “Mark my words, it won’t end well for you if you take up with Joshua again. He’s a chip off the old block.” He laughed as he turned and swayed his way back to his old truck, which was parked across the dark lot.

  Carrie shivered and wrapped her arms around herself. Once his truck had disappeared, she opened the gate and quickly stepped on the glowing cigarette butt.

  Driving home that night, she couldn’t get Kevin’s words out of her mind. Josh had prided himself on being nothing like his father. But the Josh she thought she knew would have never left like he had two years ago.

  As she parked behind the old truck, she finally accepted that the boy she’d once known was no longer. In his place was a man she desired but couldn’t trust.

  She showered and climbed into bed. As she lay there, staring at her ceiling with DeWalt lying at her feet, her mind kept going back to the first time she’d felt heat, spark, and pure desire with Josh.

  It was the week before the end of the school year. She had just turned sixteen, and she’d hidden her crush for Josh Williams for more than a decade. During the last school dance of the year, he’d bumped into her in the hallway as she’d been heading to the bathroom to clean up the punch she’d spilled on her dress.

  “Sorry,” she’d mumbled before looking up to see who she had bumped into. When she’d noticed his blue eyes laughing down at her, her mouth had gone completely dry.

  Josh had been dating a few different girls in school. All of them had been cheerleaders or part of the popular club. She wasn’t any of those things. She was the quiet shy type that had always kept her head down. She had her own clan of friends, mainly Lilly, Riley, and Sara.

  It wasn’t until he spoke that she realized he was holding her shoulders. Since the dress she’d borrowed from Sara’s closet was strapless, he was touching her bare shoulders. Bumps had risen over every inch of her skin.

  “Sorry.” He’d almost whispered it. He glanced behind her quickly, then turned back to focus on the red stain on her cream-colored dress. “Oh, that doesn’t look fun.” He nodded to the spot.

  She glanced down and sighed. “No. This time it wasn’t my fault.”

  His hands still on her skin were causing her to babble about how someone had tripped and spilled their drink on her. She had even added that she thought the boy had done it on purpose.

  “I’m sure you’re right. DJ is known for causing problems.” He tugged her gently until she moved towards the wall with him as a group of kids rushed past them. His arm went up protectively as they passed by. She glanced down at it and smiled up at him when the hallway was empty again.

  “How about a walk?” he asked her. “It’s hot and stuffy, and I was just stepping out to get some air.”

  She didn’t have to think twice about it. “Sure,” she said a little too eagerly.

  They had ended up across the parking lot at the elementary school’s playground. He held the swing for her as she sat down, making sure to tuck the dress around her. Sure, there was punch on it, but she didn’t want to totally ruin her friend’s dress by ripping the delicate lace.

  He gently nudged the swing into motion, then sat in the one beside her and started swaying with her.

  “What are your plans after school?” he asked after a moment of silence. He was a year older than her and even though he wouldn’t be a senior until next year, she knew he was probably thinking ahead already.

  She filled him in on the dream she’d had since grade school.

  “I had hoped to go to night school and become a vet, like my mother.” She held in the fact that she couldn’t stomach the blood. He didn’t need to know about her phobias.

  “Cool.”

  “You?” She glanced at him.

  He shrugged. “I want to get out of this town.”

  Her heart took a dive to the bottom of her chest. “So, you’re leaving town after graduation?”

  He stopped his swing from swaying and turned his body towards hers.

&nb
sp; “Unless I have a reason to stay.”

  Her heart jumped again, this time for joy. “Like, what would keep you here?”

  He didn’t say a word as he gripped the chains on her swing and pulled her close until they were a breath away.

  His eyes moved to her mouth. “Like this,” he said before gently placing his lips over hers.

  The kiss had done more to her than any that had come before. Her entire body shook and sizzled as his mouth slanted over hers. When their tongues touched, she melted against him and knew that no matter what happened, she wanted to be with Josh forever.

  * * *

  Business was booming. Not only had Josh hired Mason to run the local shop, he had more than three dozen other employees around the States who were programmers or in sales for him.

  He’d already received a few lucrative deals with major banks, credit card companies, and even several large online shopping sites. At this rate, he would need to hire someone to hire other people.

  Currently, his focus was on the work that was being done on his apartment. The general contractor he’d hired, Parker Clark with Clark Construction, had been in charge of the remodel work done at the Golden Oar, which had impressed him. When he found out the man had married Sara Jordan, now Sara Clark, he’d hired him on the spot to fix up his building.

  Currently, the plumbers were finishing up the installation of his new shower, but the men were still working on adding a small kitchen to the main living area. He’d divided the space into a living room, a small dining area, and a kitchen area along the side wall, where the workers were installing cabinets, countertops, a stove, a refrigerator, and plumbing for a kitchen sink and dishwasher.

  The electrician was rewiring the entire place for updated lights and outlets, since plugging a toaster oven in had fried a breaker. Most of the plugs didn’t have grounds, which meant rewiring was needed.