Unicorns are Short

by T S Paul

  I drew back from him. Albert? Was that even possible? I was still trying to work out the mechanics of that in my head when I heard cheers coming from the females and humans. Marion was bowing to me demonstrating my superiority.

  I trotted over towards Jewel and her friends when a large human hand grabbed me by the mane. “Come with me. Let’s get this over with.”

  Several other humans surrounded me and led me toward the barn. I started to fight them but remembered that my father was in this situation many times. We had a compact with humankind. They were our protectors.

  Sitting in the middle of the barn was the phantom mare I remembered from my games as a child. It looked different today. Lifelike features had been added to it, and it had a scent that totally drew me to it. Those parts of me that I never used had now come to life and were making me want to do things to the mare.

  <<<>>>

  “See what did I tell you, Charlene gets them every time. Those pheromones are the best money ever spent. Doing this the hard way was entirely too costly. Gotta love modern technology.” The speaker was a large burly man with a soft-spoken voice.

  “If you say so, Robert. Once he’s collected what happens to the product?”

  “It depends. The young males are of an age where they challenge each other for ranking and position. Did you see how the Marion bowed? He was acknowledging Fergus’s higher rank. They will continue to challenge each other until there is a definite winner. If this one here is the winner, he will spawn the majority of this year’s foals. If he doesn’t then, his ‘product’ gets sold on the open market. His father and mother are thoroughbreds, so regardless we will make bank on him.” Robert watched Fergus carefully.

  “Oh. I see. Is that the only way to make money with the creatures?” The younger man was a visiting relative.

  “No. We sell the culls to prospective ranchers, and the Magical elite wants them for party favors and parades. Usually, we save the older nags for that. The rest end up in the house or with collectors.”

  “I wondered where all the horns came from. Do you sell those as well?”

  “There is a big market for them overseas. Unicorn horn is an aphrodisiac and is used for medicines. You should know all of this Walter! This is our family business after all. Your parents run Ultra, the biggest import-export horn operation in the world.”

  “What mom and dad do is just boring Uncle Robert. This looks more fun.”

  “The Magnus family has many holdings, but Unicorns are our bread and butter. You know that they want you to run Ultra one day. You should be learning about those markets, not this one.”

  “I know. I know. This one is more interesting.”

  <<<>>>

  I heard none of that conversation. The smells coming off Charlene were too strong for me to bear. Hormones and natural urges took over my bodily functions, and I now knew why Charlene was all clawed up. I added my own horn and hoof strikes to the collection on her wooden body.

  After it was all over and the humans returned me to the main yard, I felt both satisfied and dirty at the same time. My mother stared at me and looked away when I met her eyes. She knew.

  “What did you think of Charlene? Fun wasn’t it?”

  All I could do was stare at my friend. “When did you visit her?”

  “As lead Stallion’s son, I get certain privileges. Are you challenging Albert next?”

  “No. Him and Marion are together. They have no interest in our games. You are my next challenge. Sorry.” I stared him in the eyes.

  “Good. We need to get that out of the way. I’ll try not to hurt you too badly.”

  “You, hurt me? What if I hurt you?” I cocked my head at Peter.

  He made the choking sound at me. “Right. Sure. You might hurt me. Like that’s going to happen. How about you bow right now and we not even have the fight?”

  “No. It sounds to me like you don’t want me to challenge you. How about tomorrow when the sun is at its highest here in the courtyard so all can see you bow to me.”

  “You’re on. Tomorrow.” Peter stormed off.

  I ran to the South field to see Jewel and to tell her of my upcoming battle, but the girls were no longer there. I looked in the west and east fields as well. Nothing. Desperate, I went in search of Peter.

  “They moved them. I’m surprised you didn’t notice. The girls are in the paddock to the right of the barn. Go look for them there and say goodbye because tomorrow is your last day.” Peter went back to sharpening his horn.

  What did I do to cause him to hate me so much? I waved my horn in the air on the way back. My father once told me it was all about the horn. It was what drove us and protected us. Looking up at mine with crossed eyes I wondered if I should do the same thing and sharpen it.

  Only the north field directly connected to the barn. As I drew closer, I could see a lot more humans than ever before as well as strange mechanical monsters and smells. Peter was right. The female herd was in the paddock next to the barn. Many of the new humans were staring and pointing at them. A booming voice suddenly sounded. To me it resounded like a Dragon's roar might sound. I ran for cover near the barn not worried about humans at all now.

  <<<>>>

  “Welcome folks, Welcome to the Magnus Farms fifteenth annual Unicorn fair! Don’t forget to pick up your auction information.”

  Camilla Ford scowled at the loudspeaker with disdain. “Why are we here again? You know how much I hate Unicorns!”

  “You are the one that is consistently telling me that your daughters need to get ahead in society. This is a perfect way. I love and care for them like they are my own, you know that. I thought owning a Unicorn might give Summer a boost up amongst the other girls.”

  Looking at her husband Camilla smiled. “That is very sweet Harrison! Summer would love that. If it works out, she could share with Winter when she gets a bit older.”

  Harrison beamed. It wasn’t often one of his ideas pleased his wife. He wasn’t the biological father of the girls, but he had helped to raise them the past three years and thought of them as his.

  The pair of them walked through the stalls of Unicorns up for auction. Camilla flipped through the material and stormed outside. “What is the meaning of this?”

  Robert Magnus looked at the much smaller woman with a questioning look on his face. “Ma’am? Is something wrong?”

  “Yes. All of the Unicorns on this list are ancient! I want a younger Unicorn that will grow with my daughter Summer, not some old nag that will die! How dare you try to swindle me! I’ll have your license removed.”

  “Whoa, little lady slow down! If you check the back of the pamphlet, you will see that prices and Unicorns are negotiable. I’m sure we can come to some sort of arrangement. My family has been breeding Unicorns for over a century.”

  “I’ve was a guest at Alicorn Ranch for years so don’t give me the spiel about raising Unicorns. I hold stock in your parent company Spagyric. Where are the younger Unicorns?”

  Robert looked at the fuming woman with fresh eyes. The number of non-family stockholders could be counted on one hand. He didn’t recognize her so she must be related to the shareholder. “What family do you represent?”

  “My mother is Marcella Blackmore if you must know. Do you even have younger Unicorns here?” Camilla looked around.

  The name Blackmore was a big deal. She was someone the family had catered to for years! If this was her daughter, he needed to impress her. “We do. Please come outside.”

  The paddock was filled with Unicorns. Over a dozen apparently young, smaller mares ran about supervised by older, more mature Unicorns.

  “What are they doing?” Camilla stared at the almost choreographed spectacle.

  “Unicorns are smart. Even though we cannot talk to them, they teach their young how to do things. This is one such class. If you watch, the older females will reprimand the younger ones if they make a mistake.”

  “So, these are all females then? Every Unicorn here
?” Camilla pointed at the Paddock.

  “Yes. We only sell the females. They are gentler and less temperamental. There are very few domesticated males not on farms.” Robert was pleased that this woman liked the Unicorns.

  Camilla could only focus on the most obvious words this cretin of a man had spoken. Her daughter deserved a rare Unicorn, and a male one sounded like the way to go.

  “I’ll take one but only a male. No male, no sale.”

  “Miss Blackmore, I must object. The colts are unique, we use them for breeding only.” Robert protested with very wide eyes. He only had four such young ones on the entire ranch.

  “My name is Ford. Blackmore is only my family name. Try to keep up. If you do not sell me what I want, I will tell everyone I know about the scam you are running here. Take my word for it. I will tell everyone!” She glared at him.

  Robert winced. Family name or not this woman seemed to represent high society, and a bad recommendation could sink the ranch. “Fine, you may have your male. We only have four to choose from at the moment. Like I told you before we only breed the males…” He never got to finish whatever he was saying.

  “Is that one of the males? I want him. He seems very gentle.”

  Robert looked in the direction of her finger and cursed to himself. Damn Younglings. “Yes, but he’s not suitable. He has been fighting with the other males.”

  “He looks pretty gentle to me.” Camilla stared at the young Unicorn with blue hair. He was stroking and getting stroked by one of the females. To her he was perfect! Put some ribbons in his hair, and a fancy tooled leather saddle and Summer would be the belle of the ball. “I’ll take him. Do you have a saddle that will fit him?”

  “Fine. Whatever. Yes, we sell saddles and accouterments in the shop. Did you bring a horse trailer for transport or do you need one of those too?”

  Camilla smiled. Threats were one of the keys to her success. “Harrison, take care of the details please.”

  Harrison stepped forward from the shadow he was standing in and smiled at the Ranch owner. “Hello, I’m Harrison.”

  <<<>>>

  “Jewel, the others bowed immediately to me. Only Peter is left. I have to fight him tomorrow. I thought he was my friend.” Jewel was the only one I could talk to about things.

  “Fergus, you have to fight him. It’s the only way you can be with me.” She stroked my neck and shoulders with her horn. The paddock fence was wide and easier to reach through, so I returned the favor and stroked her too.

  “Ooo Fergus that feels wonderful. When is your fight?” Jewel cooed into my ear.

  “Tomorrow afternoon when the sun is high.” If they moved us closer, I wanted her to watch.

  As she spoke, Jewel moved her horn against me with more friction and power. The vibration from it almost drove me wild.

  “Jewel that feels so wonderful! How is it your horn is able …” A large human hand grabbed my mane and yanked me away from the only girl I had ever loved.

  “You are nothing but trouble!” To me his words mean nothing. They sounded like the sound the sky makes before it rains.

  I tried jerking my head back the other way but found it blocked by three other humans. They pushed and manhandled me toward the barn. My horn was everything, and I tried to strike out at the monsters who were taking me away from Jewel.

  <<<>>>

  “Watch the freaking horn! Charlie grab his head. Pete get that door open!” Robert still had a firm grip on the young male’s neck mane.

  The head with the razor-sharp horn came around again nearly impaling one of the farm hands. “Watch yourself, Charlie! You have to hold on the horn. OK, everyone, we need to get him on the trailer. All together now…”

  Having this youngling kill one of his crew would be bad. Already he was out one prime breeder, a trailer, a saddle, and a month's supply of Unicorn food. Camilla Ford was bad enough, but her husband Harrison was a top negotiator. Where these people were planning on keeping the Unicorn was beyond him. All he knew was this was a cash only, no return deal. He wanted nothing more to do with the name Blackmore. Let corporate deal with them from now on.

  Manhandling the thrashing Unicorn, they finally got him into the trailer safely. The trailer shook with loud bangs! The Unicorn was trying to kick his way out.

  “Mrs. Ford? Here are the male’s papers as well as a care and feeding packet. Do you plan to stable him?”

  “Stable him? Why would I stable him? Isn’t he staying here?” Camilla looked up from her thoughts into the dirty face of the Ranch owner.

  “No, Ma’am. This is a cash and carry deal. Your purchase is over there.” Robert pointed.

  Camilla looked at her prized BMW M5 Touring. It had an ugly, dirty, and disgusting trailer attached to it now.

  “Harrison! What is the meaning of this?” She pointed at the trailer.

  “You said to take care of it, and I did. That is Summer’s new Unicorn. We need the trailer to get it home. Do you think your mother would let us keep it at her place?”

  “It was supposed to stay here! Why are we taking it with us? I don’t want a smelly Unicorn in my yard at home!”

  “You should have said something, honey. It was cash and carry. To get the Unicorn, I had to agree we wouldn’t try and return it.” Harrison sought to remain calm when talking to his wife. He had been a rabbit for an hour the last time he raised his voice at her.

  “Couldn’t they have delivered it? The trailer is so… so dirty!”

  “No, it was the only one they would sell me. Sorry dear.”

  Camilla looked at her husband with disgust. Dealmaker my ass. “Fine. Whatever. It’s for Summer after all. You drive.” She tossed him the keys to her car.

  <<<>>>

  Jewel only saw the men take Fergus away. The farm workers moved the female's back to the South field after that. When Peter and the others asked, she told the truth. The humans took Fergus away. Everyone assumed he was now a sacrifice and thought nothing of it. To the herd, he was now a legend like his namesake. Someone to look up to that helped keep them all safe.

  <<<>>>

  “We can’t keep it in the yard, Camilla. It would eat all the flowers, and I’m pretty sure it’s against the town ordinances to have one of these. Why don’t you ask Marcella?”

  “No. We are not begging to my Mother to save us. As for the town? Who cares. The Blackmore family owns this town. They know better than to cross me. Did you call Summer and Winter to come outside?”

  Harrison looked down at his feet. So much for his great effort to please her. “Yes, I did.”

  “Summer! Winter! Come look what Mommy bought for you!” Camilla called toward the house.

  Two little girls ran down the front steps. One older than the other.

  “What did you buy Mommy?” Summer stared at the horse wagon. “Is it a pony? Did you get me a pony?”

  “Something better my dearest one. I got you a Unicorn. He is young like you and will grow with you. Won’t that be fun?”

  “A Unicorn? But I wanted a pony!”

  Harrison only half listened to his stepdaughter argue with her mother. The rancher had given him a large packet of information about Unicorns and their habits. Very slowly he had read through them on the trip home. Food and water were pretty easy. They ate what horses did. The part that worried him was who could ride one. According to this information packet, only the pure of heart and soul had any chance of success. Status symbol or not this Unicorn looked to be trouble. Neither Summer nor her Mother was pure of heart and soul. Camilla might be right. Robert Magnus was a scam artist.

  “You will take the Unicorn and like it. Do you understand me? Harrison bought it for you, and you will respect me Summer or your sister will get a toy rabbit for a week to play with!” Camilla’s voice was stern and scary as she lectured her daughter.

  “Can I see the stupid Unicorn I’m getting?” Summer was eight going on twenty. She had grown up fast in the Ford household.

  Camilla led her
over to the rear of the trailer and Harrison opened up the top part to a wild-eyed horned demon!

  <<<>>>

  Out. I wanted out! I could hear the voices outside. Suddenly there was light, and I rushed forward mouth open, teeth extended, horn at the ready! I was pushing through and attacking.

  “Ayeee, it’s a Demon horse!” Camilla dropped back and ran away from the trailer. She left her husband and Summer to fend for themselves.

  Harrison dropped the top lid with a loud Bang! The noise frightened Winter who began to cry. Summer stared at the trailer and started to cry too. She didn’t want a Unicorn, especially if it was a Demon horse!”

  It took Harrison several hours to calm his wife down and get her to understand that they couldn’t take it back to the farm.

  “We can’t Camilla. It was a non-refundable deal. We could try and sell it to someone else? We have all the proper paperwork on him. He might calm down too.”

  “No. I won’t have that thing, anywhere near my precious daughters. Take it away.” Camilla pointed toward town.

  “And go where? You don’t want it at your mother's. If we sell it to another family, they will have the prestige of having a live Unicorn instead of you. The closest zoo is in Portland. I think they already have a Unicorn. Are you sure?”

  Camilla though hard. Harrison was right, again. They couldn’t sell it. She would never hear the end of it from the old biddies in town. The State might demand she take care of it and spend even more money on it. No, she had to find some sort of use for it.

  “I have a perfect idea. We need to throw a party. My sister Teegan’s child Agatha is about to turn seven. Let’s give it to her.”

  <<<>>>

  I said a prayer to Epona. Ironically it was the same prayer my Father used to say. “Save and protect me. Help me to make the best decisions for my life and family. My will is yours to command.”

  Human speak was not a language I understood, but the look on their faces as the door came up was priceless! I really scared them. I was the sacrifice. This is what it meant. Someone took me away from home never to return. A tear rolled down my cheek. I would never see Jewel again. Peter didn’t know it yet, but he won. He got the herd and the girl because I was sacrificed for the greater good.