Broken

by Melody Anne

  “Not at all,” he replied, but he’d lost all the joy he’d displayed when he and Justin had first hurtled into the kitchen.

  A sense of guilt followed her around while she changed for work and said her goodbyes, but she didn’t understand what she could possibly be feeling guilty about. She hadn’t done anything wrong, had she?

  Blake surprised her when he met her at the front door, his eyes unreadable. “Have a nice day at work,” he told her, and he kissed her on the cheek.

  She walked to her new car and climbed in almost in a daze. If only she could read him. After all, she was living with the guy. But it seemed that nothing would come easy between two of them.

  Jewell made it to work early and sat in her car for a moment to look at the building the doctor’s office was in. She felt pride when she walked through the beautiful front doors and said hello to the receptionist before heading to the back rooms, where her office was.

  No, her job wasn’t exciting, but she’d had enough excitement in the last year to last her a lifetime. What she absolutely craved right now was peace, normalcy, and the absence of any further disasters in her life.

  Did she miss the passion she’d shared with Blake? Well, sure she did, but she’d lived all but four months of her life without having it or missing it, so she could certainly get used to living without it again.

  She might even have a chance to find true love one day — romance and passion both. It wasn’t as if she were an old maid, to use a ridiculously dated and sexist term. Yes, she’d have Justin at home with her for the next ten years, but a lot of people had patchwork families, and having a child didn’t scare every guy off.

  If only the thought of being with another man was in the least appealing.

  Her day flew past, and when five o’clock arrived, Jewell was more than ready for some girl time.

  “Jewell, let’s get the heck out of here. It’s Friday night and I’m hoping to find some cold drinks and some hot men.”

  Jewell looked up at her co-worker, Stacy, a single mom in her late twenties who maybe partied a bit too much, but who was said to be a fun person to hit the town with.

  “Who’s coming?” Jewell asked after she shut down her computer and was putting on her coat.

  “A couple of the nurses and the new receptionist. I hope you plan on staying out late,” Stacy remarked as the two of them made their way to the elevator.

  “Are we meeting there?” Jewell asked her.

  “We should carpool. Jenna has agreed to be the designated driver tonight,” Stacy said, and she grabbed Jewell’s hand and led her to a minivan in the corner of the lot. Four other women were standing there.

  “I have had a crap week. Let’s get there before all the tables are gone,” Jenna said. She unlocked the van and the women piled in.

  It didn’t take them long to get to the bar, and within an hour Jewell was more than ready to go home. This just wasn’t her scene, and she would much rather have been spending time with Justin — okay, and with Blake, if she were forced to admit it — than with a bunch of women intent on getting drunk.

  “May I have this dance?”

  Jewell looked up at a nicely dressed man who was gazing down at her as if she were his next meal. The refusal was on her tongue when Stacy leaned over and whispered in her ear. “Yum…he’s beyond hot. Go for it.”

  Jewell found herself being pushed from her seat and led to the dance floor. Maybe it was the two drinks she’d consumed, and maybe it was depression from feeling unwanted by the man she so wanted to want her, but one dance turned into two and then three, and soon she found herself sitting at a corner table with Frank. The guy was telling her the story of his freaking life! Sheesh!

  The only thing keeping her sitting there was the hope that maybe by receiving a little bit of male attention she could somehow push away her all-consuming feelings for Blake.

  So far, that wasn’t happening.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  An hour later, Jewell was waiting for a break in the conversation, an acceptable opportunity for her to excuse herself. She wasn’t in any way attracted to Frank, who obviously thought work was his life, and she was hoping to make it home in time to watch a movie with Justin and Blake That was far more her idea of a perfect Friday night than sitting here with a man who was starting to drop heavy hints the way he wanted the evening to progress.

  “I’ve enjoyed spending time with you tonight,” Frank said as he reached across the table and took her hand before she could pull it away. “I’d like to continue this somewhere…quieter.”

  He ran across her knuckles, and she shuddered.

  The guy wasn’t taking the normal social cues she was giving him, cues that should have told him she just wasn’t interested in what he had to offer. But before she was able to respond to his suggestion, he continued.

  “We’re both attractive people with needs and the two of us have a connection,” he said with what she was assuming he thought was a seductive grin.

  This had to stop now.

  “Frank, I really appreciate the dancing tonight, and the drink you bought me, and company, but I’m not interested in starting a relationship. I just wanted to come out with my girlfriends for a few hours. I’m sure I’m not the only woman in here who is looking for something that might last longer than an hour,” she said with a gentle smile.

  No one wanted to be rejected and she wasn’t out to mislead this man or hurt his pride.

  “Oh, I wasn’t expecting that. It seemed like we’ve had something going on tonight,” he said, still holding her fingers. “Is there any possibility that you might change your mind?”

  “No. I’ve had a rough year, really, and I’m just not on the market, so to speak. Sorry, Frank.”

  He looked disappointed but certainly not devastated, which made her feel better. Of course, why would he be too upset? It wasn’t as if they knew each other, not after an hour in a club.

  She looked away from him at all the people, at the men leaning against the bar and flirting with women, at the groups sitting around tables and engaging in serious people-watching, and she could almost guess which people were hoping to hook up with someone and those who just wanted a little down time after a long workweek.

  She wasn’t really in either category. She’d just wanted to do some female bonding, but it seemed that she wasn’t at all tuned in to everyone else’s idea of night life. She’d worked too hard during college and afterward, and though she was only in her twenty-four, she felt so much older. Maybe taking on the responsibility of caring for her mother before she died and of raising her little brother had aged her. She really didn’t know.

  “Well, I’m just out celebrating tonight anyway, Jewell. I wasn’t really looking to hook up with someone, but then I saw you and couldn’t seem to take my eyes off you, so I thought what the heck. But I get it. I was in a relationship last year that threw me for a loop when it ended. I haven’t gotten serious with anyone since.”

  “I’m sorry about that. Maybe a bar isn’t the best place to go hunting for a nice girl,” she said with a friendly smile.

  “Yeah, you’re probably right about that,” he said with a small chuckle.

  “I’m really ready to go home,” she told him. She was finished with this for the night.

  “Let me walk you out,” he said as he stood and held out a hand.

  She gave him her hand and stood up, then allowed him to escort her back to the table where her co-workers — other than poor Jenna —were feeling a buzz from the large quantities of alcohol they’d been consuming. They barely registered her telling them she was going to call a cab and head home.

  “Good friends?” Frank asked, making Jewell laugh.

  “New co-workers,” she informed him.

  The valet called a cab and Frank waited with her in the chilly evening air. When the cab arrived, she turned to thank him and he pulled her to him for a hug. “Thank you for a wonderful evening. I hope to run into you again,” he s
aid, and she could see he was hoping to get her phone number.

  “I don’t think that will happen, but it was a pleasure talking with you tonight,” she told him gently. She quickly hugged him back and then pulled away when it went a bit too long.

  “I can always hope,” he said as he held open the cab door.

  Jewell didn’t bother replying this time. She wasn’t giving him her number, and she didn’t want him to hold out on any hope that she’d see him again. This was her last time for a ladies’ night out. She’d tried it and it had failed.

  Jewell hoped Blake didn’t notice it when she returned home in a cab. Though she’d have to ask him for a ride to her car tomorrow, she just hoped to make it home tonight while Justin was still awake.

  When they pulled up to the house, though, the lights were off in the living room, and her hope was dashed. It was only ten in the evening, but a lot had happened this week for Justin, too, with a new school, a new home, and moving in with a man he certainly liked and respected, but didn’t know all that well.

  Her brother was a real trouper to have such positive attitude after so much change had been thrown at him.

  She paid the cab driver, then made her way up the path to the front door and fumbled in her purse for what had to be a full minute before she found her keys and let herself inside.

  All of a sudden, loneliness like she hadn’t experienced in a while weighed down on her, and she fought the urge to run to Blake’s room and demand he give her some TLC. But that, she knew, would only ease the loneliness for a short time. She needed a long-term solution.

  If she hadn’t been so afraid of rocking the boat she was riding in, she might have opened up and told him she was feeling this way. But what if he was somehow disgusted with that and got rid of her? Justin’s life would be thrown into upheaval again. No. It was better to just go with the flow, even if she felt like she was constantly fighting the current.

  Jewell set down her purse, and then smiled when she heard a squeak. The kitten they’d gotten the day after Justin had come to live with them was winding its tiny orange body around her feet.

  “At least someone has missed me,” she whispered. She lifted up the little boy fur and nuzzled his soft fur, delighting in the purrs he released amid its high-pitched mews of satisfaction at being held.

  When she stepped into the living room and found Blake sitting back with only a dim lamp lit and an unreadable expression on his face, she stopped. “Why are you sitting here like this?” she asked, looking around.

  When Blake was at home, he was almost always working, either in his office or in his favorite chair in the living room, and one thing she knew about him was that he really liked lots of light. She was always turning it off in the rooms he exited, and he often laughed at her about her compulsiveness.

  When she moved again, she noticed a bottle of bourbon on the table beside him, and an empty crystal glass next to it. That didn’t look good.

  As she drew nearer, she noticed his muscles were tense, and the look in his eyes wasn’t as casual as she’d first thought. No, his eyes were burning. She’d seen that look before, not that she was able to interpret it.

  “Is everything okay, Blake? Is Justin okay?” she asked, getting ready to bolt for the stairs to assure herself that Justin was still there, that he was fine.

  “Justin went to sleep two hours ago. It’s been a busy week for him,” Blake said, and her heartbeat slowed just the tiniest bit until he stood up and began moving toward her.

  Jewell didn’t know why she took a step backward, but there was something dangerous in his eyes, and every muscle in her body was screaming at her to run. She knew that was foolish, but at the same time, her instincts were most likely right.

  “Put down the kitten, Jewell,” he told her as he drew ever closer.

  Jewell had almost forgotten about the kitten. “Oh,” she said as she freed the little fur ball and watched as he ran off, probably to destroy something.

  “You’re really worrying me, Blake. What in the world is the matter?” she asked as she took another involuntary step backward.

  “I have given you time to adjust, have waited for you to tell me you’re ready, have moved in together with you, reunited you and your brother, and still I’ve waited, and I haven’t gotten the green light from you,” he said, and she stepped back yet again.

  “What in the world are you talking about, Blake?”

  “Since rescuing you from Relinquish Control, I’ve only had you two nights. And it’s been over three weeks since the last time we were together — three weeks, Jewell. And then tonight you go out with another man,” he said, his muscles flexing, his eyes sparking.

  “What? I didn’t go out with another man,” she told him, though she didn’t understand why she was denying it. “That wouldn’t be your business anyway,” she said, suddenly tired of being defensive when she didn’t even know why she was being that way.

  “Max was there,” he told her.

  “I didn’t see him,” she began before stopping. “Then why in the world didn’t he give me a ride home?”

  “I wanted him there to make sure you were safe. Apparently you were more than safe,” Blake said, his voice menacingly low.

  “I don’t need someone to spy on me, Blake,” she told him. She didn’t get to say anything more, though.

  Blake must have decided they had conversed enough, because one second they were facing off against each other and the next second she was completely out of breath. He’d reached out and grabbed her, hauling her body against his before lifting her in the air.

  And then they were moving — right toward his bedroom.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Blake pushed his bedroom door open with his foot, and shut it the same way. Jewell was so shocked by his behavior that she uttered not a word of protest. And then she was airborne for a brief moment before the bed caught her.

  She was trying to clear her head, but his scent enveloped her, and all she could do was to inhale the musk of the only man she had ever desired.

  Still, he was behaving like a brute, and she thought about trying to stop him — for about two seconds — but then he was on the bed with her, his legs pinning hers down as he pulled off her coat, shirt and bra in a quick sweep, leaving her upper half bare to his view. He moved to the side, but only to yank off her pants and minuscule panties, and now he was ripping his own clothes from his body.

  It was so fast — all of it was happening far too fast.

  Before she was able to protest, Blake was stretching his now naked body on top of her, and the feel of his solid chest pressing against her tender breasts made her cry out his name in pleasure.

  “Yes, Jewell,” he told her, “the only name you’ll ever say like that is mine.” His lips captured hers, subduing her moans of pleasure.

  His mouth trailed down the side of her throat, where she knew he’d feel the pounding of her pulse, but she didn’t care. He made her burn, and as much as she hated the weakness, she felt too damn good at the moment to have any regrets.

  “I can’t believe I kept from touching you so long,” he said, and he circled her nipples with his lips and nipped the tender peaks before washing them, soothing them with his tongue.

  He slowly moved his mouth up between her breasts and then he was kissing her again, invading her mouth with his tongue while his solid erection pressed against her core. She couldn’t help but spread her legs out wider as her body begged his to make her complete.

  “Please, Blake, please fill me,” she groaned. She planted her feet on the bed and lifted her hips, urging him to join with her.

  It had been too long since they’d last made love, and she wanted fulfillment, she wanted the two of them to be as one, and she wanted it right now. Her passion was overwhelming in its intensity.

  Blake didn’t answer her plea; he instead gripped her hair and angled her head just the way he wanted it, the better to devour her mouth, while he rubbed his hardness on the out
side of her wet core, letting it help lubricate him, prepare him for entry.

  “Now, Blake, please,” she said again as she pushed up against him.

  She raked her fingernails down his back and gripped his muscular behind in her desperation to have him inside her. If he wanted her to beg, then she would beg, but she would also take all of him she could take.

  “How much do you want me, Jewell?” he asked as he reached for her hands, took both arms, and, holding her wrists with one hand, pushed her arms above her head.

  “I want you, Blake. I need you. I need you now,” she practically sobbed. To hell with power games. She wasn’t in the mood for anything but completion.

  He rewarded her for those words by reaching down between them and slipping his fingers inside her hot core while stroking her aching bundle of nerves with his thumb. She cried out when only a few flicks of his masterful fingers brought her release, her body tightening, her heart thundering.

  “Yes,” he sighed. “You are so responsive, my Jewell.” And before she could even think about catching her breath, he pulled his fingers from her and moved them upward to cup her breast and squeeze her nipple at the same time as he thrust hard inside her, nearly bringing her to orgasm again right then.

  Time lost meaning, and something seemed to come over Blake. She felt his thrusts, each and every one of them, as he moved his hips, pushing in and pulling out of her. Moans tumbled from her throat while he growled words of praise and pleasure almost in time to their frantic lovemaking.

  Sweat slickened their bodies as the inferno built higher and higher and each time Blake ravaged her mouth along with her body, she felt almost as if she were floating above herself, watching this exquisite moment while still feeling each and everything he did to her.

  Jewell knew she was forever lost to this man, because no matter how long they were apart, the instant she was in his arms again, she belonged to him, only him, and it was right where she needed and wanted to be.

  “Come for me, Jewell. Squeeze me tight,” he commanded her.