Just Like Breathing (Bring Me Back Book 1)

by Diana Gardin

  After more time passes, Arden’s parents arrive.

  John and Nancy Simmons got in the car and drove up from Florida as soon as they received Brantley’s call. I stand and shake their hands, and Brantley fills them in on Arden’s current condition.

  And then we’re all waiting. I turn down any offers of food or drink from Axel and sit with my hands clasped, elbows resting on my thighs. Head down, eyes closed behind my glasses.

  Praying.

  This woman? She belongs to me. She needs to make it through this, so I can show her exactly what she means to me.

  I’m not typically someone who prays. Not even after my own accident. But for this?

  For Arden, I pray.

  When soft footfalls echo in the hallway and a man’s voice speaks, I leap to my feet.

  “Are you Arden Fontaine’s family?”

  “Yes,” Nancy answers for all of us. “How is she?”

  “She sustained injury to her spleen, which was bleeding and needed to be removed. She also has two broken ribs as a result of the collision.”

  Nancy’s gasp, and John’s murmured, “Oh, my God” sends my heartbeat into overdrive. My knees wobble, but I stay focused on the doctor’s words.

  She’s alive. Focus on that. She’s alive.

  “She came though the surgery, but there’s something you need to know about what happened back there.”

  I swallow.

  “Arden flatlined while she was on the operating table.” The words drop like bombs on those of us gathered in the waiting room, but I feel each one explode in my chest.

  She left me. She left me?

  “Jesus,” I breathe, my hands gripping the back of my neck so tightly it hurts. Axel’s hand lands on my shoulder, squeezing tight.

  “We honestly didn’t know if we’d be able to bring her back. But now she’s on the other side of it. We were unable to bring her around after the anesthesia, so we have to wait until she wakes up on her own before we know if she’s out of the woods.”

  “Are you saying…” I try to keep my voice low and controlled. “Are you telling us that she’s in a coma? Again?”

  Brantley’s strangled cry reaches me, and I close my eyes.

  “We know her medical history, and I’m sorry to tell you this. But yes, she’s in a coma. However, it might be exactly what her body needs to heal. For both her and the fetus.”

  Silence.

  Did he just say…

  No one speaks, and I feel like I’ve been dunked underwater. Unable to draw breath.

  I take a step forward. “I’m sorry, what did you just say?”

  The doctor pauses before replying, like he’s just figured out that none of us knew what he just revealed. “I said that Arden and the baby are getting the rest they need. Her body is working overtime, not only to heal itself, but to support the fetus’s life.” He pauses. “Are you the father?”

  Axel thumps my shoulder, letting me know that the doctor is speaking to me.

  I swallow thickly. “Yes.”

  There’s a smile in the doctor’s voice. “Congratulations. We’ll monitor them closely over the next couple of days. It’s a miracle the fetus came through all of this at all, quite honestly. I’ve never seen anything like it before…but the heartbeat is strong.”

  This time, my knees do buckle, sending me down to the floor. The impact of his words have just hit me, and they hit me hard.

  Baby. Arden is carrying my baby. Christ.

  Axel lands beside me, his arms going around me. “You’re gonna be a father, man. Holy shit, you’re gonna be a father!”

  My throat burns as my eyes fill, and all I want to do is go sit by my girl’s bed until she wakes up.

  Because she will wake up. There’s no way we aren’t bringing this baby into the world and raising him or her together.

  We’re going to have a family. We’re going to have it all.

  I know it.

  “Can we see her?” Nancy’s tears overflow into her tone, and I glance up as I listen for the doctor’s response.

  “Yes. You all can see her, two at a time.”

  I was the last person to go in to see Arden, because I knew that once I was there, I wasn’t leaving. My forehead rests against the soft blanket covering her legs and both my hands are wrapped around one of hers. The steady beeping of the monitors is the only comfort I have that she’s here with me, because she hasn’t moved once in the last twelve hours.

  Sitting up, I focus on where I know her head lies. “Come on, sweetheart.” I try not to choke on the lump in my throat; the one that’s been lodged there since I received Brantley’s phone call. “I need you to wake up for me. I need to hear that sexy voice and I need to feel your hand squeezing mine. And then I want to thank you for making me a father.” My voice breaks, and I scrub a hand over my face. “Come back to me, Bunny.”

  I reach up to find the hair I know is falling over her forehead, brushing it back. I paint the picture of her I’ve created in my head over the months I’ve known her: long, blond hair and a stunning, delicate face. Green eyes and a sexy, toned figure. Before I went blind, it was all about what looked good to me where women were concerned. When I lost my sight, I figured I’d lose the ability to be attracted to someone.

  Then Arden came along and showed me what true attraction means. How you can fall for the inside of a woman before you even touch her on the outside. That you can be drawn to someone like a magnet without having had sex with them first. She changed the game for me, and there’s no way in hell I’m going to lose her now.

  I lay my head back down on her leg, blowing out a frustrated breath. Closing my eyes, a sudden thought flies through my head.

  Lessons. First, learning how to be the man I was meant to become without my eyesight.

  Then, figuring out how to reconcile with the fact that I might be meant to be with a woman who’s just as broken as me.

  Now…another example to show me I’m not the one in control. Sometimes, I have to wait.

  I fucking hate waiting.

  When I open my eyes, it’s obvious I’ve been out for a few hours. My watch tells me that it’s past dawn. I sit up and listen, grabbing my bearings. There’s no one in the room with us; the only sound is the continuous soft beeping of the monitors.

  The monitors keeping an eye on my girl and my baby.

  A smile tugs at my lips as I reach for Arden’s hand. I breathe a sigh as soon as my fingers are wrapped around her cool ones.

  “Time to wake up, Bunny. We need to figure out what we’re going to name this baby.”

  The soft pressure of her fingers squeezing my hand makes my heart stutter.

  I suck in a breath and hold it. Letting it out slowly, I squeeze her hand softly.

  She squeezes back.

  “Shit…Bunny? Baby, are you awake?”

  She squeezes my hand again, and I jump up from my chair. Running my hands along the back of her bed, I search for the call button the nurse showed me last night, and then press it.

  I don’t even bother brushing away the hot tears that drip from my eyes as I dip my head down close to hers. “I’m right here, sweetheart. Right here. I missed you…God, I missed you. Just hold tight, the doctors will be here in a minute.”

  She squeezes my hand twice, and I drop my head back and send up another silent prayer.

  Thank you.

  Epilogue 1

  Arden

  July 4, 2018

  “Oh, my God, Flash,” I moan, as my sweat-soaked skin slides against the fabric of the lounger. “Why? Why are women allowed to be pregnant during the summer? This is like a special ring of hell, just for those of us brave enough to carry children in July in the South. Do you understand that, Flash? Why did we decide to do this?”

  His answering chuckle makes me want to hit him, but then I glance over at him on the lounger beside me. His chiseled body, gleaming a deep bronze from the summer sun, on display in nothing but a pair of black swim trunks.

  Je
sus, he’s sexy. I’m a lucky woman. I should stop complaining about being pregnant in the summer, because that’s my view.

  Flash’s mouth tips up in his crooked smile as he glances over at me. One big hand stretches out to clasp my own, and he tugs until my body is pressed against his in the double lounge chair. “We didn’t decide, baby. The decision was made for us, and I’m damn glad it was.”

  His arm curls around me, and despite the heat, I snuggle into his side. There will never be a time that I don’t want to be close to Flash. He’s my addiction, and it’s one I don’t ever want to quit.

  “What time is everyone coming by for the cookout?” he asks, his voice against my ear making me shiver, even in ninety-degree heat.

  “Um, Brantley and Axel will probably be here early.” Separately, of course, since my stubborn best friend can’t admit that she’s crazy about Flash’s brother. “Everyone else will get here around four.”

  Flash presses the button on his watch and his smirk grows wider and darker when it speaks: “One-oh-five.”

  “Looks like there’s plenty of time for me to cool you off.” Grabbing the glass from the table beside him, he tips it toward his lips and gathers an ice cube in his mouth.

  My breath leaves me as he flips me onto my back and uses his knee to spread my legs wide. I glance around, nervous butterflies mixing with the anticipation that I feel whenever I know Flash’s hands and mouth will be on me.

  It wasn’t long after leaving the hospital in February that Flash and I decided we wanted to raise this baby together. We made the decision to sell the house I shared with Trenton, and I moved into the place that Flash knows best; his home. Truthfully, I was ready to let go of the memories that caused me so much pain on a daily basis. Now, when I remember Trenton or Danté, with Flash or with Brantley or my parents, the memories don’t make me so sad. I can talk about them without falling apart, and planning for this new baby on the way with Flash has been a huge part of that healing process.

  It took over a month, but when Flash finally told me that I’d flatlined on the operating table that day, everything that happened in my mind—that I thought was a dream—clicked into focus. I told him everything, but only him. That last goodbye with Trenton was the thing that allowed me to move on with my life. The push I’d needed to finally let them go and believe that they were together, and that they’re happy.

  “There you go,” Flash whispers as he slides down my body. “Acting shy again. No one can see you, Arden. You’re all mine, and you’re safe with me. You know that, right?”

  I nod, my eyes never leaving him as he finally presses his full lips to my inner thigh. I suck in a harsh breath, my heartrate skyrocketing in response to his touch.

  “That’s it, sweetheart,” he affirms. “Take a breath for me. That’s why I had this pool put in back here. So you can relax, even with the heat.”

  My eyes flit toward the rectangular pool lying in the gorgeous setting of our backyard.

  “Yeah.” My fingers clutch at his bare shoulders as his hands slide my bikini bottoms down over my hips. “I’m definitely feeling relaxed.”

  Flash pushes my knees up until my feet are resting on his shoulders. Then he dips his head forward, finding my slick folds with his tongue. My muscles clench tight, and then he slides what’s left of his ice cube inside me.

  “Oh, God,” I moan, my hips writhing. “Please, Flash.”

  His fingers follow the cube of ice, disappearing inside me. “Please what, Bunny?”

  Knowing what he wants to hear, and knowing he’ll continue with this delicious torture until he does, I gasp out the words, “Please make me come.”

  His growl is the only answer I receive before his tongue finds my clit, swirling slowly around the swollen bundle of nerves. Driving me wild until I’m thrusting against his face, whimpers pouring out of my mouth like prayers.

  “Yes, Flash…oh, God…”

  He removes his fingers and his tongue, and before I can register what’s happening, he’s switched our positions, pulling me on top of him. With frantic fingers, I grab hold of his swim trunks and tug them down, almost humming with ecstasy when his cock springs free. He juts out toward me, so perfectly long and thick, and my mouth waters at the sight of him.

  “You see what I did there, Bunny?” One hand resting behind his head, his smile is far too pleased.

  I narrow my eyes, distracted. “What?”

  He grins. “I shared. Best friend ever.”

  My mouth drops open, and in response, I grip him in my fist and position myself over him. Dropping down, I take him inside me with one grind, and his hands fly to my hips as I rock forward.

  “Fuck,” he growls.

  “What were you saying?” I rasp, my head falling back as I circle my hips slowly.

  He doesn’t answer; instead, he finds the straps of my bikini top and unties them, letting the fabric fall free from my breasts. He weighs them in his hands, pushing them together before sitting up and sucking a nipple into his mouth.

  “Oh…” I gasp. “My God.”

  I ride him hard and fast, feeling the pleasure inside me rise again as he meets me thrust for thrust. We don’t need any more words as we find our rhythm, the pace that drives us both toward the cliff that we always jump over together.

  And when I fall?

  There’s never a doubt in my mind that this man will catch me.

  Epilogue 2

  “Thanks, Mandy. Everything looks awesome. I’ll talk to you later. Yes, I definitely want to see the list of companies we’re using for our product placement ads. Thanks again.”

  I hang up the phone in my home office and rub my eyes. I stand from my chair and stretch, and when Nitro’s whine lets me know that he’s as ready for bed as I am, I reach down to pat his head.

  These late nights are all going to be worth it come spring of next year, though. When we launch the Intelli Surface product line, SJI is going to skyrocket to the top of the tech world. Pride fills me every time I think about what I’ve accomplished, and how well the public has responded to our teasers.

  Arden’s footsteps on the wood floor in the hallway outside my office makes me walk toward the doorway, ready to greet her. I hope my arms and she flies into them, her peach scent threatening to overwhelm me as it always does.

  “Baby, it’s late. What are you—”

  She cuts me off. “Flash…it’s time.”

  My whole body freezes, everything around me going silent as I process the words she just said. Time. Time…holy fuck.

  “Time time?” My voice lifts with wonder as my hands go immediately to her round, swollen belly.

  She sucks in a sharp breath, one of her hands going to my shoulder and bunching my shirt in her hands. She doesn’t speak for a moment, and my heart launches itself into my throat.

  “Bunny, talk to me. Are you okay?”

  Jesus. Can I do this?

  “I just got off the phone with my doctor, and she wants me to go ahead and come in. Contractions are getting closer, and…”

  I silence her with my lips on hers. “Stay right here, baby. I’m going to grab your bag. Did you call Brooks?”

  She squeezes my hand. “Yes. He’s already on his way. Should be here in a few minutes.”

  Dropping a kiss on her forehead, I grab Nitro’s harness and we rush out the office door. “Good. Stay put, and breathe, baby.”

  By the time I make it back downstairs, Arden is opening the front door for Brooks.

  “Evening, folks. Heard we’re about to have a baby.” The smile is clear in Brooks’ voice, but all I want to do is get my girl in the car and safely to the hospital.

  When we’re settled in the Suburban, Brooks takes off, and I keep Arden’s hand clasped in mine. She changes position several times, finally deciding to lay across the backseat with her head in my lap. She goes through three contractions in the car before we finally arrive at the hospital, and I’m pretty sure every nerve ending I have has been set on fucking fire.


  “Good luck, Flash,” says Brooks, as I guide Arden toward the door of the maternity ward.

  “Thanks, Brooks.” I call back over my shoulder. “Can you do me a favor and call Axel and Brantley?”

  I catch his answer before the doors slide shut behind us. “Of course.”

  The next half hour is a whirlwind as Arden is checked into a room, changed into a hospital gown, and hooked up to the machines that monitor her and the baby.

  “I want,” she gasps, as she breathes through another contraction, “an epidural.”

  “Of course you do, sweetie.” The nurse who’s been monitoring Arden sounds like she knows exactly how Bunny’s feeling. “But I just checked you, and we need to go ahead and get the doctor up here. It’s time for you to push.”

  “Already?” Arden squeaks, and my stomach clenches with fear.

  “Is that normal? This seems fast. Is everything okay with the baby?” I fire questions at the nurse as I run a reassuring hand along Arden’s back.

  “Everything looks just fine.” Arden’s OB enters the room with a calm, soothing tone in her voice.

  Breathing out a sigh, I nod. “Okay then.” Turning to Arden, I place my face right beside hers, speaking into her ear. “You’ve got this, baby. Let’s get ready to meet our baby girl.”

  I feel her hair brush my cheek as she nods.

  “We’ve got this.”

  Nothing has ever felt like this.

  Joy, fear, awe, and an overwhelming urge to vomit are all at war inside me. I run my hand all over the tiny bundle in my arms, warm and soft and so fucking fragile.

  “Tell me what she looks like, Bunny.” I swallow, the emotion almost getting the best of me as I cradle our daughter to my chest.

  Arden’s voice is a caress against my soul, soothing me, calming me. “She’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen, Flash. She’s got your stormy gray eyes and your coloring. But she’s also got light hair and the cutest little nose. Her lips are so cute and perfect. I…God…” She swallows, and I sit down beside her on the bed. “She’s perfect.”