Silent Cravings

by E. Blix

  It had started when one of the sous chefs burned his hand and had to make a trip to the emergency room. This left a sauce that Analie didn’t know the name of unattended and Jacques had ordered her out of the protective bubble of her corner. His exact words were to “keep stirring the sauce or I will murder you with a flour sifter.”

  Analie wasn’t sure how you could do someone in with a flour sifter, but she was certain that Jacques could pull it off.

  The woman continued to frown down at Ashi for a very long, very uncomfortable moment. Finally, she tossed her long hair over her shoulder and stepped aside, gesturing for him to come in. Despite the mellifluous quality to her voice, her tones were anything but friendly.

  “Wait on the couch. I will see if she is available.”

  With graceful, purposeful strides, she disappeared into the hallway leading to the bedrooms. She shut the door, lowering her voice conspiratorially as Jessica, sprawled on her bed, glanced up from her textbook.

  “There is a strange man asking for you. He’s not dressed very well.” That last sounded more scandalized than anything. “He’s waiting on the couch.”

  Jessica had a test in the morning and didn’t have time for interruptions. However, she liked Christoph and figured he was probably running into troubles with Mouse again. Easy enough to fix.

  “‘Kay. What’s with the dress?”

  The blonde shrugged. “Part of the ensemble for the entertainment at La Petite Boisson tonight.”

  Jessica smirked and tossed the book on her nightstand, heading to the living room. Ken picked the weirdest outfits for his underlings sometimes.

  When she saw it was Ashi sitting on the couch, not Christoph, she paused. Warily, she continued forward, offering a cautious, “Hi.”

  “Hi,” Ashi said in return.

  There was an awkward pause.

  “I need your help. I can repay you however you want. I need to choose a lee—a vampire that I will be a donor to tonight. I was wondering if you knew someone who isn’t like John who is looking for a donor.”

  He didn’t intend to, but right then he looked like a lost puppy.

  Jessica didn’t know what she’d been expecting, exactly, but that really wasn’t it. She didn’t mean to, but she ended up staring, mouth hanging open for a second after he finished.

  “Well, uh…” she trailed off. What to say? She chose her words carefully, settling next to him on the couch. “I don’t know who is looking right now. I’d introduce you, but most of them are probably at work and I have to be up early for a test tomorrow morning. I can’t stay up and wait for them to come back. I could probably introduce you tomorrow, if you want. Or you can ask Clarisse to do it, if she isn’t looking for new donors herself.”

  Ashi nodded slowly. He didn’t like to be surprised about anything, so he kept his expression neutral at the news Clarisse was a vampire. He wouldn’t have suspected in a million years, particularly after seeing her acting so… domestic when he hid in the living room of her apartment.

  “All right. Thank you. If you could tell me where I can find Clarisse—if I can find her right now—I would be grateful.”

  “She and Lisa share the apartment across the hall from John and Wesley downstairs.” Jessica sighed at the look on Ashi’s face when she mentioned John’s name. “Never mind, I’ll show you the way.”

  With that, she rose, running a hand through her hair and stifling a yawn.

  Ashi followed her. He felt like he was in a dreamlike state, but not one brought on by doing forms. A floating sensation gripped him, as if he were not part of his body anymore, or at least desperate to get away from it. And instead of the euphoria that came with the more spiritual side of his martial arts, there was only a feeling of vague unease.

  As Jessica knocked on Clarisse’s door, Ashi wondered if he was going to faint.

  Clarisse answered within moments. Her welcoming smile died when she saw Ashi cowering behind Jessica. This couldn’t be good.

  “Evenin’, lass. What’s all this about?”

  “Ashi has a question for you,” Jessica replied, her tones arch and dry. With that, she stepped aside and put a hand at his lower back, urging him to step forward so he could talk to Clarisse without hiding behind her.

  Ashi did take a step forward. He cleared his throat. “I would like to be your donor” was an outright lie. He didn’t think he could pull it off with a straight face. After some very noticeable hesitation, he spoke up. “I would be very grateful if you accepted me as your donor.”

  That sounded pretty good.

  Clarisse just stood there, staring, for quite a long moment before giving a short bark of laughter, long black ringlets flying as she shook with mirth. “Aw, that’s endearin’, lovey. Sorry, but you’re not much my type.”

  “Oh, come on, Clarisse,” Jessica chided. “You could give him a chance.”

  Clarisse frowned, folding her arms. “He’s not askin’ me because he likes me, ye silly bint. I donnae want a donor who flinches from me whenever I come a’callin’. He does nae want tae have John touch him again, an’ that is nae reason enough for me tae take him on.”

  Jessica frowned right back, turning to Ashi. “You wouldn’t flinch from Clarisse, would you?”

  Ashi glanced between Clarisse and Jessica. After a very drawn-out moment of silence, he heaved a sigh. He felt tired now, no longer weightless and nervous and dreamlike. He was just a lump of exhausted Ashi.

  “Flinch? Of course I wouldn’t flinch,” he mumbled, rubbing his face. “I would downright cower or possibly try to fight. Christ, this is nuts. I’m afraid of all of you and I have to figure out someone who scares me the least so they can drink my blood. I have a million horror stories from my pack swimming around in my head, and I keep remembering details from them. Lev raped girls as he tore them apart. Rosa would skin her donors once their beauty faded. Saojin Fung—”

  “—strung people up by their intestines until the crows pecked through and they fell. Malik cut the feet off his slaves and made them dance. Hayabaki tore his donors’ faces off and made them return to their villages until the entire countryside was filled with monstrous people.” Christoph walked up behind him in the hall. He reached over and smacked the back of Ashi’s head. “Grow a pair. Also, be less of an asshole.”

  Ashi covered his face. “I’m going insane.”

  Jessica was exchanging horrified looks between Ashi and Christoph. She covered her mouth with her hands, turning a curious shade of green as she edged away from them both. Clarisse scowled and rubbed her temples.

  “Laddie, ye hear the horror stories of our kind, but ye dinnae seem tae acknowledge what’s right in front of yer eyes. Do ye really see me or Mouse or Alec or Angus or Ken—anyone in this building—except for John, the scutterin’ gobshyte—doing any of those things?”

  She brushed past Ashi to Jessica’s side, putting a comforting arm around her shoulders. It was a little awkward considering how much taller Jessica was, but she seemed to appreciate it, nonetheless. She was speechless after hearing those gory descriptions of the monsters out of Goliath legends.

  “There are those of us who do monstrous things, ’tis true. But not a one of them live in this building or work for Alec Royce.” Clarisse narrowed her bright green eyes, staring at Ashi with disdain. “If ye think ye can get yer head out of yer arse long enough tae see that, I’ll take ye on as a donor. But if ye can’t get over lumping me in with those monsters, then I’ll have nothing tae do with ye.”

  Ashi, again, was quiet for some time.

  “Maybe I can see the people here in a different way,” Ashi said, halting, unsure. “You’re obviously not like John or Rosa or any of the other vampires that... that... terrify me to the core of my be—”

  Christoph slapped a hand over Ashi’s mouth. “Please realize he left
at six a.m. and has been running ever since. He’s tired. I’m sure he would love to be chummy with you.”

  Ashi was still mumbling behind Christoph’s hand.

  Christoph turned to Jessica. “I’m sorry we upset you. We have happy stories, too. And I don’t think of the people here as belonging to same group as Malik and Saojin Fung, trust me. I’d be hiding in the closet with Ashi if that were the case. A real closet. In a totally manly way.”

  Jessica was still pale, her eyes wide as she stared at Christoph. She was too shocked to laugh, though Clarisse managed a faint chuckle.

  “God, that’s horrible,” Jessica whispered. “How could they do something like that?”

  “Lass, those atrocities are nothing new. Look at Attila the Hun. Vlad Dracul. Hitler. Ye donnae have tae be vampire tae be psychotic. And just because we need tae drink blood tae survive does nay mean that some incredible personality shift takes hold of us. Most of the time, anyway,” Clarisse said, though that last was muttered a bit quieter than the rest. “We are the same people we were before we turned, just with different needs.”

  Jessica shivered. “God, no wonder he thought we were all crazy.”

  “If you could not bring it up with Analie, that would be great,” Christoph said. “She hasn’t heard all the stories. She’s not of age yet.”

  He removed his hand from Ashi’s mouth. “Anyway, here’s your tiny Korean man. I’m going to see if Analie has cookies.”

  With that he slapped Ashi on the back, gave him a thumbs-up, and marched over to Mouse’s apartment.

  Jessica nodded, rather nonplussed. “I have to get back to studying. I’ll see you guys later.”

  Clarisse gave her a faint smile and a pat of encouragement before she hurried off, then looked Ashi up and down, pursing her lips. He looked too frazzled to be of any use to her. Like Angus, she didn’t suffer useless donors, but maybe he’d come around once he saw that she wasn’t about to leap on him and steal what she wanted.

  “Do ye want tae come in, lad? Ye can sit down and rest, if ye wish.”

  No, I want to hide in my closet.

  “Sure,” Ashi said. Might as well make nice.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Ken was feeling mighty cheerful.

  Requests were rolling in from the club’s web site for the new dancers. It amused him to no end that Ashi and Christoph hadn’t yet debuted and were already developing a fan base.

  Ken was dashing in his immaculate three-piece charcoal pinstripe suit, the pink undershirt matching the tiny stripes. The small garnet in his earring matched the stones set into his cufflinks and tie tack. He smelled terrific and knew he’d catch the eye of every man and woman in the club. That was fine. He’d bask in the attention until the show started.

  With a spring in his step, he headed upstairs, knocking on Sebastian’s apartment door. Loudly. Explosions and screeching car tires came from inside. He’d come early, counting on needing to help Ashi and Christoph get ready—they probably hadn’t even gotten dressed. Or even recalled that this was the night they were supposed to start working at Twisted Temptations.

  Since Ashi’s stony glare tended to make people back away, he was never asked to open the door. Christoph got off the couch and lumbered over. He was in jeans and one of the few T-shirts that he’d been allowed.

  He hadn’t remembered he was supposed to start “working” until he opened the door and blinked at the very well-dressed vampire grinning at him.

  “Aw, shit,” he groaned. “That’s tonight?”

  Ashi twisted around on the couch and his olive skin went pale as he spotted Ken. Since his ill-fated escape attempt and Clarisse had laid her claim, he had also done his best to forget that they were supposed to start working this evening.

  “Oh, no way.”

  Gregory silently helped Gavin pick through the wreckage that was once the alpha’s den. Very few of the books were damaged, and none beyond repair, but he was going to need new bookshelves. The contents of the beanbag were spread all over the room, the desk was smashed into fragments, and there were deep claw marks in the walls.

  A massive black werewolf was in the corner, its mane stuck through with splinters. It panted heavily, snarling between breaths. A laptop lay upended on the other side of the room, the flickering screen offering glimpses of an e-mail with pictures promoting a new feature at a night club.

  “Special mission, huh?” Gavin muttered to Gregory.

  “Shut up,” Gregory spat back.

  “I guess they’re undercover.”

  “Shut up.”

  “Yes, way,” Ken caroled, snapping his fingers and gesturing for the two to follow him to their bedroom. Sebastian and Thad were having a monstrously difficult time keeping their faces straight and hiding their grins as they focused on the TV.

  “Have fun, boys,” Thad said, the mock-lisp not lost on Ken, who glared.

  “Come on, you two, let’s hustle. We’ve got to be at the club in less than an hour.”

  Ken didn’t wait to see if they followed, going straight to their closets and riffling for something for them to wear. Before long, he had an outfit hung over each arm. His choices weren’t too bad. Relatively speaking.

  Leather pants for both, billowy button-down shirts (blue for Christoph, green for Ashi), and a strappy-looking contraption made of latex, leather, and nickel-plated rings completed the ensemble.

  Christoph took the clothes and the strappy thing, making a face at the latter. “Okay. I’m pretty sure I haven’t forgotten how pants work, so what the hell is this thing?”

  Ashi took the shirt and pants to the bathroom without a word. He left the contraption behind.

  “If I’m wearing it, you’re wearing it,” Christoph called after him.

  “Bite me,” Ashi said from the bathroom.

  Christoph turned to Ken. “I fear your intentions. How’s this thing work?”

  Ken sighed, lifting a hand to cover his face. He took a deep, unneeded breath, and took the strappy thing from Christoph, shaking it out and holding it up. It vaguely resembled a shirt when held the right way.

  “You can undo the clasp in the front here, and put your arms through the top couple straps. It looks more complicated than it is.”

  He set it down on the dresser, pointing out the simple snap-clasp on the front where all the straps connected.

  “Wear it under the shirt. The idea is you take your time taking the shirt off like Reece showed you yesterday. Trust me, you’ll have the crowd eating out of the palm of your hand. Figured this would save your ‘delicate sensibilities’ if you two are too chickenshit to show off anything else,” Ken explained, grinning at that last. “We’re not about full nudity at Twisted Temptations, just the closest thing to it.”

  “I don’t think I’ve ever felt this uncomfortable in my life,” Christoph said cheerfully as he pulled off his shirt and fiddled with the Bondage Shirt of Emasculation until he got it on. “It’s kind of tight.”

  Ashi stepped out of the bathroom. He took one look at Christoph and turned back. Christoph sprinted across the room and grabbed his arm. “Oh-h-h-h, no. You’re putting yours on even if I have to beat you into unconsciousness first.”

  Ashi had already put on his shirt, so he had to take it off. Christoph put his actual shirt on and twisted this way and that. As Ashi struggled into the BSoE, he glared at Christoph.

  “What the hell are you doing?”

  “It’s not that bad,” Christoph said. “I could wear it all the time. The movies, the grocery store, on the bus, around the house...”

  “Please don’t wear it around the house,” Ashi said, pulling the green shirt on.

  “I could sleep in this.”

  “I don’t want to room with a bondage freak.”

  “You can move in with Reece.�
�

  Ashi turned to Ken. “Can we please get this over with?”

  Ken was trying hard not to laugh at Christoph’s cracks and Ashi’s discomfort. He plucked at the shoulders of Ashi’s shirt.

  “That won’t do.”

  He went back to the closet and started rummaging.

  “Too tight in the shoulders, you can see you’re wearing something under it. You’re supposed to surprise the audience, not give it all away before you’ve even started. Damn that you’re so built for such a little guy.”

  He pulled out a vibrant red shirt, giving it a dubious look before putting it back and immersing himself in rummaging.

  “Christoph, you need to do something with that hair.”

  He found a dark blue shirt and thrust it at Ashi. He snapped his fingers and gestured that they follow again, sauntering out.

  “They were laughing at us,” Ashi muttered as they went downstairs.

  “Ken, my hair is a dangerous beast that consumes all that tries to mess with it,” Christoph explained as they walked. “The best I can do is cut it into a smaller version of itself. Watch this.”

  In the first floor hallway, he shook his head vigorously while scrubbing his fingers through his hair. It would have reduced anyone’s hair to a tangled, puffy mess. In Christoph’s case, when he dropped his hands and held still, his hair didn’t look that different. With a few tosses of his head left and right, the original curls settled into place.

  “Uncanny,” Ashi commented.

  “Isn’t it?”

  Ken smiled, a wicked, sexy look that would’ve sent a man less secure in their hetero preferences running for the hills. “That is charming. But alas, you have not met my fantastic line of hair care products. That unmanageable beast is about to be tamed.”

  He led the way into his apartment. Reece was reading GQ on the couch. His outfit was similar to the Weres’s, except that the white shirt had a high collar that only gave a glimpse of a white leather choker studded with silver rings. It was a stark contrast against the dark chocolate hue of his skin.