by Carrie Elks
“Good. Because those curls are all mine,” Lainey had replied, her eyes flashing. “Any other stylist lays their hands on them and I’ll chop their fingers off.”
Grinning at the memory, Courtney went to flick off the living room lights, but a banging on the door froze her hand in place. She frowned, glancing at the thin watch on her wrist.
It was almost ten o’clock at night. And people rarely stopped by after seven around here, at least not without calling. It was seen as the height of bad manners. A strange pull in her stomach made her put the never-used chain across the door before opening it, her brows pulling together when she saw who was there.
“Carl?” she said softly. He was still in his uniform, his hat in his hands. “Is everything okay?”
“I just got off shift. Can I come in?”
She hadn’t seen him for weeks. Hadn’t spoken to him since that bitter exchange at Christmas. “Sure,” she said, closing the door enough to unhook the chain. When she opened it, he stepped inside.
“Would you like something to drink?” she asked politely. “I have some lemonade in the refrigerator. Or I can make something warmer?”
He looked her up and down, taking in the swell of her stomach where it rose out of her maternity pants. “No,” he said, his voice low. “I’ll only be a few minutes.”
“Then let’s sit down,” she suggested. “My whole body aches. I’m not sure if it’s work or the baby. Probably both.”
“Are you well?” he asked her. “Is the baby doing okay?”
She felt a wave of warmth at the fact he’d even asked. “Yeah.” She nodded. “We’re both good.”
They sat on the sofa, a small gap between them. Closer up, she could see the dark shadows beneath his eyes. “Was it a bad shift?” she asked, knowing how terrible some of the things he had to deal with were.
Like the day he’d had to watch them pull his brother’s body from the car wreck.
“A domestic incident that we’ll never be able to solve without somebody getting killed,” he said, rubbing the heel of his hands across his eyes. “And an old woman who, from the kindness of her heart, took in a kid only to have him steal her life savings.”
“People are assholes.” She gave him a sympathetic smile.
“Sure are.” He cleared his throat, his eyes landing on hers. “Mom tells me you’re thinking of selling this place.”
She felt that tug again. “Yeah. Nothing’s solid yet, but I’m looking into it.”
He nodded, running his hand across his smooth chin. “Are you moving in with him?”
When she opened her lips to answer, she could feel her heart slam against her ribcage. “Yes,” she said. “I am.”
He closed his eyes, inhaling sharply. “You don’t need to do that.”
“What do you mean?” Her brows tugged together. “I’m not doing it out of need. It makes sense, for me and the baby.”
“Makes sense to put yourself at his mercy?”
Courtney couldn’t help but laugh at that. “At his mercy? That’s what you think?”
“I don’t know what to think. You’ve completely changed, Court, and it’s his fault. You would never have put this place up for sale if it wasn’t for him. You wouldn’t be pregnant either. It’s like he has this hold on you, and I hate the way it’s making you act. He’s no good for you.” His gaze flickered down at her stomach. “For either of you.”
She had no idea what to say. Looking into his eyes she could see the hurt there, and it hurt her, too. No matter how angry she’d gotten with him when he’d hit Logan, she also knew he’d done it from a place of pain.
“Just because I’m moving doesn’t mean I’m leaving the farm. Or the family.” She ran her tongue along her dry lips. “Or that I’ve forgotten Shaun.”
Carl swallowed hard. “The day we laid him in the ground, I made a promise that I’d always look after you. And I’ve failed. If he’s watching now, and I’m goddamned praying he isn’t, he must hate me.”
Her throat tightened. “You have looked after me. All of you. And Shaun would know that.”
Carl pressed his lips together, shaking his head. “No I haven’t,” he said, his voice cracking. “I’ve let you become this.” He gestured at her. “I’ve let this big city guy come and take you away from everything that’s important. You’re leaving the house Shaun left you, Court. The same house you’ve lived in since he brought you home. It’s like you don’t give a fuck about it any more.”
“Of course I care. But I need to move on.”
“With Logan Hartson.” His voice was harsh.
She took a deep breath. “Yes with him.”
Carl blinked. Were his eyes shining? “You’re a damn fool.”
“I know you mean well, Carl, but I don’t need you to watch out for me. I’m a grown woman. I know what I’m doing.”
“Are you sure? Because where I’m sitting I see you making a big fucking mistake. Did you know I stopped him for speeding a couple of weeks ago?”
Courtney looked up, surprised. “No, I didn’t know that.” Her face flushed.
“He was probably too embarrassed to admit it. Made some stupid excuse about needing to catch a flight. What about the next time, Court? What if the baby’s in the car with him? Do you even know this guy?”
“Carl, I…”
“Just think about what you’re doing. For me. For Shaun. Think about Mom and Dad, too. We need you, Court. You’re the glue that keeps us ticking since we lost Shaun. And now we’re losing you, too.”
Her eyes widened as a sob escaped his lips. She’d never seen Carl cry before. Not even at Shaun’s funeral or anything else that happened during those awful months after. He’d been stoic. Strong. Someone to lean on.
Her own eyes teared up in sympathy. “You’re not losing me. We’ll always be friends. And I’ll still work here. I’ll see your mom and dad. It’ll be okay.”
He brought his head up, his eyes red as he looked at her. Her heart broke a little more. “Please don’t do this,” he said thickly.
“I want to.”
He raked his hands through his hair, squeezing his eyes shut. A tiny tear escaped from them. “I should go.”
“Carl…”
He opened his eyes. “Fuck it.” He reached out for her hand. “You know what, Court? I’m in love with you. I’ve been in love with you since the day Shaun brought you home. And I said nothing, because he’s my brother. I said nothing when you stood beside him at church on your wedding day, and I said nothing all those times I saw you crying whenever you thought nobody was looking. I hate myself for it now. I hate that I didn’t ask you what was wrong. That I didn’t tell you how I feel. If I had, maybe we’d be together right now.”
“It’s not your fault,” she whispered. “And we wouldn’t be together. But we’d still be friends.”
“That’s not enough. I don’t want to be your friend, I want to be your husband. I want to take care of you the way you should be. I want to protect you from douches like Logan Hartson, who’ll break your heart all over again.”
“That can’t happen,” she told him. “I’m not in love with you.” And it hurt to see the pain in his eyes.
“Can’t I love you enough for both of us? I’ll take care of you and the baby. Be a father to them. I’d treat him or her like my own. You know I would.”
She swallowed hard. “I know,” she whispered. “But the baby already has a father. And I’m in love with him.” Pain shot across his face like she’d stabbed him in the gut. “I’m so sorry.”
He stood, curling his fingers around his cap. “I should go.” He wouldn’t even meet her gaze.
She reached for him, but he pulled away. “Carl…”
He shook his head. It was enough for her to know that nothing she could say would make this better. A tear rolled down her cheek as she watched him walk to the door, his shoulders slumped, his head bowed.
She hated this. She hated seeing him hurt. Hated knowing that this family wou
ld always be fractured, and some of it was because of her.
Without a word, he pulled the door closed behind him. After less than a minute his engine started up, and the headlights swept across the window.
Her phone started to buzz. She picked it up, seeing Logan’s name on the screen. “Hello?”
“Hey. How are you doing?” His voice felt like a balm to her aching heart.
“I’m good,” she lied, forcing a smile to her lips even though he couldn’t see it. “How are you?”
Chapter Twenty-Six
Logan looked around the restaurant, his critical eye taking in every detail. One of the lamps over table eight was misaligned. He’d get the electrician to fix that today. And table thirty was sloping to the left. Not enough for most people to notice, but it might end up rocking – every restaurant eater’s nightmare – and food or drink could slide in the same direction. He’d ask the carpenter to check the legs.
But even with the snags that any new restaurant had, he had to admit it looked amazing. And it should. Six months of hard work had gone into it, after all.
The past few weeks since Christmas had been full on. He’d missed Courtney like crazy. Yeah, they talked every day, and chatted for hours but it wasn’t the same. Still, she’d be here tomorrow, along with the rest of his family to celebrate the opening. And in a couple of weeks he’d be flying back to Hartson’s Creek for her twenty week ultrasound. It would be their first opportunity to learn the sex of the baby if they wanted to, though they were still on the fence about that.
He wanted all their firsts. That’s why this kind of lifestyle wasn’t sustainable any more. As much as it gave him pangs to think about leaving all this behind, what choice did he have?
He wanted his family. He didn’t want to be the guy who wasn’t there when Courtney needed him. He didn’t want her to be escorted to the doctor by her best friend or ex-mother-in-law when it was his job to be there. It was crazy how he found himself jealous of an old lady who’d lost her son, just because she would be seeing his child on a screen.
A rap on the front door brought him out of his thoughts. Seeing Cam on the other side of the smoked glass, Logan grinned, walking over to unlatch the lock and let him in.
“This is a surprise,” he said, slapping his brother on the back to let him know it was a welcome one. “What are you doing here?”
“I had an appointment with a doctor across the way. Thought I’d come in and see how you’re doing.” He looked around the restaurant, his eyes wide. “Wow.” He let out a whistle. “This is amazing.”
“Thanks.” Logan inclined his head toward the bar. “You want a drink?”
“I’d love a water. And some juice if you have any. I worked out first thing this morning and haven’t drunk enough since.”
“Sure.” The two of them walked over to the bar. “What was your appointment for?” Logan asked. “Is your ankle acting up again?”
Cam shook his head, leaning on the polished bar as Logan walked around and grabbed two glasses. “Nah, the ankle’s fine. I’ve been having headaches and the team doc wanted me to get some diagnostics done. No biggie.”
Logan looked over his shoulder at his brother. “What kind of headaches?” He passed Cam a tall glass of mineral water, then reached down to the refrigerator for the juice.
“Remember those pressure ones I used to get when we were kids? Like when a storm is coming or something? They feel like those. As though I’ve still got my helmet on when it’s been off for hours.” Cam took a sip of water. “I’m hoping they prescribe the good painkillers and let me get back at it.”
Logan remembered those headaches. He used to get them, especially in the years after their mom died. They’d gone away as he’d got older, and he hadn’t had any since.
“Well let me know what the doc says.” Logan poured them both a tumbler of juice.
“Sure.” Cam smiled at him. “So, are you all ready for tomorrow?”
“As ready as we can be. The decorator arrives early tomorrow to set everything up, and Ryan is already in the kitchen.” He nodded his head toward the heavy metal door. “You’ll also be pleased to hear the booze is here.”
Cam laughed. “I don’t drink. Not during football season. You know this.”
“Yeah, but we can watch Gray and Tanner get drunk. Almost as much fun.” Logan took a sip of his juice. “Even more fun if Maddie and Van start to nag them.”
“Speaking of other halves, I hear Courtney’s coming, too.”
“Yeah she is. Did Grey tell you?”
Cam nodded. “We spoke last night. I’m glad she’s coming. I like her.”
Logan’s gaze met his brother’s. Cam’s approval was important to him. For most of their life, they were the closest people to each other, after all. Logan had told Cam about his plan to leave Boston and head back to Hartson’s Creek to be with Courtney. His stomach had twisted up with guilt at leaving his brother here. But Cam had encouraged him.
“You’re gonna be a dad. Nothing’s more important than that.”
And he was right. Didn’t mean that Logan wasn’t going to miss being in the same city as his brother though.
“Are you bringing someone tomorrow?” Logan asked.
“Probably not.” Cam grinned at him. “I’m not seeing anybody I want my whole family to meet.”
Until a few months ago, Logan had felt the same way. His family and his romantic life were completely separate. Not that he’d had much of a romantic life until Courtney came around. Even so, it took a special kind of woman to cope with meeting all of the Hartsons at once.
“Have you thought about what you’re gonna do back home?” Cam asked him.
“Not yet. I’ll still have a financial interest in the restaurants, but the day-to-day will be done by Paris and the new partner. So there’ll be some work to do from Virginia, but not tons. And my friends, Dan and Ellie who own a restaurant down there have asked for some help with marketing.” He shrugged. None of it sounded particularly exciting. Not compared to opening a glamorous restaurant in the heart of Boston.
“You’ll find something,” Cam said, his voice reassuring. “Though I can imagine it’ll be hard to leave this all behind. It’s been your life for years.”
It had. The restaurant business was who he was. He ate, lived, and breathed it, twenty hours of every day. It was hard to think how he’d deal with all that spare time on his hands.
“Maybe I’ll take up golf,” he said out loud.
Cam laughed. “Yeah, right. You and Dad at the eighteenth hole, the baby in a carrier strapped to your back. I can see it now.”
“Well what are you gonna do when you retire?” Logan asked his brother, turning the tables. “Maybe you can give me some tips.”
“I’m never gonna retire. You’ll have to pull me off the field in a wheelchair.” Cam winked.
It was funny, but not funny all at the same time. Because both of them were defined by what they did. They always had been.
As kids they were the twins. Defined by a pure quirk of nature.
As teenagers they were the star football players in the school, which brought its own pleasures and pressures.
And now, Cam was riding high with the Bobcats, and Logan was the owner of the most successful restaurants in Boston. It was impossible to imagine anything that wouldn’t be a come down.
Logan wasn’t stupid. He knew there would be a hole in his life. But that hole would be filled. By Courtney and the baby, and the future they had together. That was the certainty that kept pulling him through.
Before he’d met Courtney, he’d laughed at the concept of soul mates. Shaken his head at the way his friends fell one by one for the women who’d changed their lives. He hadn’t had space for a relationship like that, even if he’d wanted one.
Yet she’d broken through that shield he’d put over himself. And now he was changing, too.
“We’ll be okay,” Logan told his brother, as he finished his glass of juice. “We’re
adaptable. We always have been.”
Cam lifted an eyebrow. “Yeah. And if worst comes to worst we can open a Sports Bar together. You run the place, I’ll hole up in the corner and tell people about my glory days in exchange for pints of beer.”
Logan lifted his empty glass, grinning as his twin clinked his own against it. “It’s a deal.”
“Okay,” Lainey said the following day at the salon. “I’m thinking an up do. We’ll straighten some of the front, then fix the curls at the nape of your neck. Maybe leave some tumbling down. It’ll look perfect with your dress, I promise.” She lifted Courtney’s hair, her brows locking together as she pulled it this way and that.
Courtney grinned at her friend’s reflection in the mirror. “Go for it. I’m in your hands.”
“You have the prettiest hair,” Maddie said from the salon chair next to Courtney’s. Behind her was Nicole, styling her hair into a high top knot that enhanced her high cheekbones and perfectly bow-shaped lips. “Has it always been that curly?”
“Apparently, I had straight blonde hair when I was a baby,” Courtney told her. “But then it all fell out and grew back like this.”
“I wonder if your baby will be blonde at first, too,” Van mused from the other side of Maddie. Along with Becca, Logan’s sister, all four of them were at the salon before they were due to be picked up by a limo and taken to the airport to catch their flight to Boston. It had been Maddie’s idea to come here first, and Lainey had been more than happy to bring two extra stylists in. Courtney looked around at them all, feeling warm inside.
It felt like she was part of something new. Something good. For the first time in a long while she felt excited. Tonight she’d be reunited with Logan, something she was so damn happy about. It had been a long couple of weeks without him, and the telephone and Skype calls didn’t cut it. She needed his warmth, his strength, the deep woodsy scent of his body. No amount of phone calls could substitute for that.
They’d already planned the weekend out. Tonight would be busy, of course, with getting ready for the party and with all the family around. And Sunday morning would be spent having brunch with them all. But in the afternoon, before she was due to catch her flight back, Logan had asked if they could go shopping together. Buy a few novelty items for the baby in Boston, followed by a tour of some of the sights. It felt important to him. As though it was his last chance to show her the city he loved. So of course she readily agreed.
