Anathema (Sojourner Series Book 4)

by Maria Rachel Hooley

  “You can’t just do nothing, Lizzie. You’ll bleed to death. Go to the hospital, or I will call the police and tell them you’ve broken into the cabin.”

  “Then I won’t go back to the cabin. I’ll find another way.” I punch the disconnect button on the phone and turn it off, setting it in the seat and looking at it, knowing at this moment Griffin is frantically calling, worried out of his mind about me. But the way I see it, it doesn’t matter. What can the hospital do? Patch me up and send me home? Or worse, call Jimmie and get him up here just in time for the nightmare to begin? That can’t happen. Even if I have to start running again, Jimmie can’t come here. I won’t risk his life.

  I start the Jeep and drive back to the cabin so I can pack my things. I veer on the road more than once, and I almost pass out, but I end up making it there in one piece. Thankfully, Griffin hasn’t called anyone yet that I can tell. I think it’s just a bluff, but with Griffin it’s pretty hard to tell.

  I stagger from the Jeep. The stain on my jacket has doubled in size, and for the first time, I realize just how much trouble I might be in—not that I know what to do about it. I can’t go to the hospital. My vision is worse. I’m seeing two of everything, including the keyholes, which makes it really hard to get the key in and unlock the door. I fumble once…twice and finally get it in. My fingers tremble so badly that I can hardly turn it. By the time I finally get the door open, I just leave the keys dangling there in the lock, figuring I’ll pick them up on the way out.

  As I struggle toward the bedroom to gather my things, someone grabs my arm, the wounded one. I groan and whirl.

  “What the hell are you doing here?” The face matches the pictures, so it’s got to be Griffin’s father. He’s wearing a navy sweater and tan pants, clothes that come from an elite catalog, just like Griffin’s. I see the resemblance now, but his eyes are cold whereas Griffin’s are warm.

  “I…I’m sorry.” I step back and that’s when I see the shotgun in his free hand. Considering all the trophies on the wall, he definitely knows how to use it. Just my luck.

  “What are you doing here? And how did you get in? There’s no sign of forced entry.”

  I step back until I touch the wall. “I was just crashing here for a day. I just came to get my stuff. I’m sorry. I won’t be a bother anymore.”

  “Like hell,” he snaps, his eyes blazing furiously. “You’re trespassing. I’m not gonna let you just waltz in and out of here like you belong. Who knows what you’d shove in that bag of yours on the way out. Do you even know who I am?” He shakes his head. “No, I don’t suppose you do.”

  Well, that answers my question. Griffin didn’t call him, or he would know who I was. This is all just another bad coincidence; I’m so lucky these days.

  He grabs my unwounded arm and starts jerking me back down the hallway toward the door. He’s moving so fast I fall. He tries to jerk me to my feet.

  “Get up!” he yells. I see him aim the shotgun at me, and I close my eyes. I hear scuffling sounds. Then nothing. Yet I can’t bear the thought of opening my eyes. I don’t want to know what’s going to happen.

  “Elizabeth? Can you hear me?”

  I open my eyes to find Evan kneeling in front of me.

  “You shouldn’t be here,” I manage and try to look for Griffin’s dad. “Where is Mr. Hauser?”

  “Heading back home. He had a great hunting trip that never happened, and he doesn’t remember you being here. That will keep him out of our hair long enough to deal with this wound. Let’s get you to the bathroom.”

  I try to pull away. “You shouldn’t be here,” I manage, louder.

  “If I weren’t, you’d bleed to death, or your arm would get infected, you’d be too weak to get yourself to the hospital, and the infection would kill you. I can’t let that happen. As it is, it’s bad enough.”

  “You’re stubborn,” I mutter, closing my eyes. I feel so tired.

  “You need to stay awake, Elizabeth. We’ve got to get that bullet out.” He slips his arm around me, helps me stand, and leads me down the hall. I end up leaning against him more often than not because the world is swimming around me, and I have to close my eyes to keep from throwing up.

  “Please tell me Lev and Celia didn’t come with you,” I murmur as we slip into the bathroom and he sits me on the counter.

  “No, they didn’t. Take your jacket off.”

  “Okay.” I ease out of the jacket. A whimper escapes my lips as I move that arm, and Evan’s frown deepens when he hears it. The jacket slips from my hand and I almost fall forward, but Evan supports me. “Take it easy.”

  Both of us stare at my blood-soaked sleeve, and I shiver, wondering how much blood I can afford to lose before it’s too late.

  Evan shakes his head. “It’s a good thing Griffin told me what happened. We’ve got to stop the blood loss. It’s serious, Elizabeth.”

  “It was serious before I took a bullet, Evan. There’s the Triune, remember?”

  He swallows hard. “Well, first thing’s first. Your shirt is ruined; I’m just going to cut the sleeve off so I can look at the wound.” He grabs some scissors, but I pull away.

  “Maybe it would be better if you just did nothing.” My voice is soft and filled with pain. His eyes turn hard.

  “You have no right to think like that, Elizabeth. None of this is your fault. You have been caught in the middle of things for so long you don’t realize that anymore. I don’t want to hear you say that again. Period.”

  “All right.” I lean back against the mirror and close my eyes. I don’t have the endurance to watch him pull the bullet out. I just want all this to be over. I don’t care how it ends up just so long as it ends.

  “Elizabeth?” The voice is far away, and I want it to leave me alone. I want the blackness. I don’t feel anything there. But the voice keeps calling my name, and it’s worried. That makes me finally open my eyes.

  Lev lies next to me. All around us is black, but his skin glows white. I see one wing rising up over his shoulder, the perfect feathers adding to the glow of his skin. I stare into his beautiful eyes, and the color seems unnatural from the battle of his light against that blackness.

  “I thought I’d lost you, and it terrified me.”

  “You shouldn’t be here,” I whisper, my voice breaking. “It’s not safe.”

  He leans toward me and kisses my forehead. “Don’t worry yet. I’m not physically with you. Right now, I’m in a car with Jimmie. We’re driving toward Hauser’s Landing. You’re there with Evan.”

  “How are you here?”

  He strokes my face and touches the front of my neck. “Evan told me to come to you in your dreams. He was afraid you’d try to turn loose of your body.” He grits his teeth as though he’s forcing out those last words.

  “He mentioned that, did he?” My voice is weak, and I find myself shaking as I look into Lev’s eyes and see the fear losing me causes him. What a thing for an angel to be afraid of.

  “You can’t give up, Elizabeth. You can’t. Not if you love me. And no matter what else happens, I know you do.”

  I nod . “I’m tired, Lev. I never thought I’d be this tired. I’m not even eighteen yet, and I don’t see much of a chance of me reaching it.”

  He slips his fingers across my lips. “No, you will. One way or another, we will make sure of it.” He closes his eyes, and I can tell he’s thinking something by his painful expression.

  “What? What aren’t you saying?”

  His eyelids open, and I find myself swimming in his perfect blue eyes. “Maybe this is really my fault. Because I loved you.”

  I lift my hand and touch his face. “How could that be?” I ask softly. “I was your lesson, Lev. You can’t be punished for doing what you were supposed to do.”

  He inches closer and kisses me, his hand cradling my head. It feels like we could stay like this forever, so I guess I’m not really expecting it when he gently pulls away.

  “There’s one thing I reall
y don’t get, Elizabeth.”

  “What’s that?” My voice is soft and breathy. Then again, that’s Lev’s fault. He does that to me.

  “Why you keep running away from me? Don’t you understand there’s no place you could ever go on this earth where I couldn’t find you. Granted it might take me a little time, but I’d find you. One way or another.”

  I swallow hard. “I don’t want you to get hurt.”

  “We’re meant to be together. God started this in motion, and I don’t see any way for it to end differently.” He lies on his back and gently pulls me so I’m resting on his chest, my head tucked beneath his chin. “You should get some rest now, Elizabeth. I have a feeling when you wake up, you’re going to be sore, and there’s nothing any of us can do about that. So sleep now, and don’t try to slip away. I can find you even there, if I need to. Never doubt that I’ll do it, either.”

  “Do you think there is any way to make this work, Lev? I mean it seems that no matter what, neither of us can exist apart from the other.”

  He smiles softly and looks down at me. “I’m counting on it. It’s all a part of having enough faith to get by.” He kisses my forehead. “Now go to sleep.”

  That pain that Lev talked about is the first thing to jar me from sleep. It’s not really a sharp, stabbing pain but more of a slow, carving one that aches so deeply it rattles me to the bone. Although I want to reach for sleep, I know I can’t. It’s gone. Even through my closed eyelids, I can sense the world around me is filled with light, hinting at daylight.

  I just haven’t a clue if it’s the same day or a different one. There’s only one way to find that out.

  I inhale and exhale one last time and force my eyes to open. The world is bright and blurry. Beyond that, I’m not sure of much, including where I am. I blink two or three times, thinking that might clear things, but the fuzziness remains. I turn my head to one side and try to see if there is anyone in the room with me, but everything is still, so I’m not sure. Time for the next step. I start to sit up, but when I try to put my arms underneath me to support me, I feel the pain from the wound and cry out.

  “Elizabeth?”

  In my peripheral vision, I see someone rising, and the voice is a dead giveaway. Evan.

  “You need to lie back down and get the pressure off that arm.”

  I feel him gently nudging me to a reclining position, and the pain makes it really easy to give in. “Where am I?” I whisper, my voice weak from a dry throat.

  “Still at the cabin.”

  I keep blinking, trying to clear the haze. His face comes into focus. He’s frowning in concern, and his hand rests on my shoulder, keeping me down.

  “You shouldn’t be here,” I whisper, knowing it’s not going to do any good. I don’t think there’s anything I could say that would make him leave.

  “We’ve talked about this, Elizabeth.”

  “But you’re still here.”

  He nods . “Yeah, I am.” He sits back and stares at my arm, watching to make sure I’m not still bleeding.

  “I want to sit up.” I expect him to argue, but he just leans forward.

  “Then I guess you’re gonna need help to keep off that arm.” He stands and goes around to the other side and gently takes my arm. “You ready?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Okay.” He starts lifting me carefully, and while the motion hurts, it’s nothing compared to what it could be. I do my best to bite my tongue and not make any noises that might make him second-guess my health.

  He hovers next to me, waiting to make sure I can adjust to sitting up. My stomach is clenching, and I try to focus on something else. I don’t want to vomit. I just hate feeling so fragile, as though I could just fall apart any moment.

  “How long have I been out?” My hair falls across my face, and I lift my good hand and brush it back.

  “Almost a day, Elizabeth.” He stands and starts pacing the room. “It was touch and go there for a while. I wasn’t even sure you were going to wake up, and I didn’t have a clue what I was going to tell Lev when he got here.”

  I shake my head, more frustrated than before. “He shouldn’t be here, either. Don’t you guys understand how dangerous I am?” At that moment, I think back to the fight with Sarah and how quickly it was over. Of course, if I hadn’t had that power, I would have died. I summoned it so quickly it shouldn’t have been possible—and if I could do that at the drop of a hat, there’s no telling what could happen next, which is so not good for other angels.

  “Lev doesn’t care about the danger. He cares about you.”

  I struggle to my feet. “I care about the danger! I care if he lives or dies. But nobody seems to worry about what I think, I guess.”

  “You should sit down,” Evan orders. “Besides, Lev hasn’t arrived yet. He’s still on the road.”

  I start to stumble, but Evan is there, whether I want him to be or not. He catches me and waits until I manage to hold my own before he eases his grip. “I need to go to the bathroom.” I grit my teeth. Actually, I just need to get some space between us because right about now he’s hovering a little too close to Jimmie’s style for my taste.

  I take two more steps and sense he’s close to taking my arm again, thinking I can’t walk by myself. Yet I wave him back. “I’m all right. I can do this.”

  He nods and takes a step back, the frown on his face much like one I’ve seen on Lev’s face before. I think it comes from unrestrained frustration.

  Not really so sure I can do this myself, I keep my hand touching things like the dresser, the door, the walls—anything to keep me upright as I inch down the hallway and into the bathroom. Once inside, I close the door and lean against it. Immediately, I feel exhaustion creeping back because I’ve exerted myself so quickly. I stay there, my eyes closed so I can catch my breath. Then I force myself to walk over to the sink to wet my face down, hoping that will refresh me.

  As I step in front of the mirror, I see dark shadows beneath my eyes. And I see a huge bulky bandage on my arm from where Evan pulled the bullet out of my arm. Just seeing the thick white gauze both renews my nausea and reminds me how much it hurts.

  My trembling hand pulls the water handle, and the flow eases from a tiny dripping to a constant flow. I dip one hand into it and rub my wet fingers across my eyes two or three times. While it does bring some color back into my face, it doesn’t make me look any more normal. Then again, I’ve been shot, so there’s no chance of me looking that way.

  My head aches so much I know I should get back to bed. I’m quickly feeling the effects of being on my feet to long. Shaking, I jerk the water handle to turn it off and stumble against the door. The pain hits hard and low. I pull it open and stagger into the hall. I don’t know if Evan heard me as I hit the door, but he’s waiting there and is quick to slip his arm around me.

  “You look like you’re going to pass out, Elizabeth.”

  “I’m okay,” I argue, trying to stand on my own, but he’s not about to release me. Truthfully, he probably shouldn’t, consider how shaky I feel.

  “Let’s get you back into bed, okay?”

  “Yes.” Suddenly too tired and light-headed, I lean against him and let him pretty much carry me.

  Chapter Fourteen

  The world is dark, and I am running, hard and fast. But I don't know where I'm going or why. My heart is racing, and I know someone is following.

  It takes a moment to realize I'm surrounded by woods and the moon is only a sliver in the sky.

  Where am I?

  I glance over my shoulder, and suddenly I see the light breaking through the stretch of trees around me. They're coming. I try to run faster, but my foot catches on a large root, and I tumble to the ground, landing on my hurt arm. I scream as the light approaches, the brilliance filtering around the trees as it heads towards me.

  I'm struggling to get to my feet, but the light is faster. Then I see that angel, tall and thin. Ghostly pale. He's almost on top of me before I can eve
n get to my knees, his hands reaching outward.

  "No!" I scream, trying to bat them away. Yet I see balls of light gathering at my fingertips. The power is surging, almost ready to be released.

  Pain. The sudden jolt of it sends the light from my fingertips outward. It leaps toward the angel, and I hear a horrible screeching. I fall back to the ground, covering my ears and roll into a fetal ball, trying to protect my wounded arm. The searing pain is intense, and I'm crying.

  The nausea hits quickly and I vomit. The same thing that always happens when the power surges through me. It's probably a sign that a human isn't supposed to have that kind of a power, but I do.

  "Lizzie! Wake up!”

  It's Jimmie's voice. It's distant, but I see him standing over me. There is still that horrible light glowing in my fingertips, and he's standing there like a target.

  "Jimmie, go away!" I yell, forcing myself to get to my feet, no matter how dizzy I am. He tries to grab me and help, but I pull away.

  "Get out of here!" I yell and start running.

  "Elizabeth, stop!" Lev blocks my path, and my body collides with his. In my peripheral vision, I see the glowing is brighter. The ball of light at my fingertips is bigger, much more threatening.

  "Get out of here!" I yell, crying. I try to push past him, but I can't. And to my side, I see the angel from the Triune rising.

  "It's a dream, Elizabeth," Lev tries to assure me. I see the white glow of his wings behind him, and I feel the energy of light coursing through my body, readying itself for another blow.

  "No, it's not! Look at my hands, Lev. The power is ready to discharge, and there is one of the Triune over there!" I try to point. "Where is Evan?"

  Suddenly I feel a rough jarring sensation as Lev grabs my shoulders and shakes me hard. "You have to wake up, Elizabeth! Now!"

  For a second, the darkness seems to tumble all around me, and I feel myself falling before Lev's arm encircles me. Pain...so much pain. I stare at my hands, searching for the glowing, but there is only darkness, as it should be. I find myself looking up at him, his blond hair glowing in the moonlight. His warm breath funnels outward, and he stares at me with a tight-lipped frown.