The One I Want

by Scott, S. L.

  It’s been eight years. I’ve read enough periodicals to know he succeeded and seen photos to recognize the changes I see in him now. I don’t need to put on a show or pretend we’re friends. We’re not. I know that as much as he does. But I still have one lingering question for him. “Was stabbing me in the back worth it?”

  When shame flashes through his eyes, he releases the woman’s hand and shoves his in the front pockets of his jeans. For a moment, I almost expect him to say something kind. “Still bitter, Juni?”

  I expected too much. “No,” I answer honestly. “You did me a favor.”

  “How so?”

  Tossing the rest of the muffin back in the bag, I push off the ground and dust my backside. I pull the straps of the bag onto my shoulders and cross my arms over my chest. “If I’d won, I wouldn’t be free.”

  It wasn’t a great comeback or even the one that had played out in my head for the last eight years. There was never going to be a reward or revenge, but it felt good to finally get that off my chest.

  I didn’t live up to expectations, and even worse, I crashed and burned when it was my moment to shine. But as I walk across the grass with him standing there stunned, I don’t have one regret leaving that life behind.

  6

  Andrew

  “Commitment is the foundation of a business. Trust builds it.” My father’s voice fills the office.

  “Did you start the jacuzzi, Corbin?” My mom’s voice is heard in the background. “I brought the piña coladas.”

  Eyeing my brother sitting across from me, I rattle my head, needing that image out of it. Nick silently gags, so I finally say, “Sounds like you two have a busy night. We’ll talk soon, Dad.”

  “Hello, Andrew,” my mom sings in the background. “How are you, honey?”

  “Good, Mom. Busy, but that’s typical.”

  The sound of water splashing, and her giggles follow. “Hope not too busy. New York has so much to offer if you just give yourself some time to discover it.”

  “I know. I know,” I say, sighing. “But it’s a busy time of year, so—”

  “So schmo, Andrew. Tell your brother to take you out. He’s lived there for years, he probably knows all the great places.”

  My eyes dart to Nick, who shakes his head, and then mouths, “Don’t do it.”

  I hate sacrificing my brother, but I need the deterrent from my life. “Actually, Nick’s right here.” I shrug, inwardly chuckling.

  She asks, “Nicholas?”

  “Yeah, Mom?”

  “How’s Natalie?”

  “Wow, that’s how it is now? I give you the daughter you always wanted, and you give me the cold shoulder.”

  Both of my parents laugh. Water sloshes, and then my dad finally pipes back in, “It’s not like that at all, son. Your mom talks about you all the time. When are you coming for a visit?”

  “We’re thinking next month.”

  My mom replies, “That works for us. The weather’s been beautiful.”

  “It’s California,” Nick says, “the weather is always beautiful.”

  She says, “And your sarcasm is duly noted.” Not letting anything bring down her mood, she splashes my dad from the sound of it.

  Nick adds, “Sorry. You’re right. The weather here has been a nice change from winter. I need to talk to my bosses about splitting my time between LA and New York for the seasons.”

  I say, “Your boss is right here.”

  “I’d love that,” my mom replies. “I miss both of you so much. Nick, you should take your boss out for drinks. You know, schmooze him.”

  Listening to her plot with my brother is entertaining. They go back and forth before he asks her, “What have you been up to?”

  “I started doing sunrise yoga on Thursdays again.” We nod as she continues, “Oh, and Andrew might be interested in this. Are you still there?”

  “I’m here.”

  “I saw Megan and Dalen Dalery at The Polo Lounge last week. She just recovered from a brow lift and looked refreshed.”

  Nick’s eyes dart to mine, and he asks, “Dalen had a brow lift?”

  “No, her mother, Megan, silly. Dalen is much too young for that. Speaking of Dalen, she looked so pretty in a pink dress. Do you and Dalen still talk, Andrew?”

  “Not much, but I get an occasional text here and there.” It’s strange how a sexual relationship can turn into a platonic friendship, but it did for us. After a few months, we realized the sex was great, but we didn’t see a long-term relationship working out. The friendship was good, though. I think that’s why it was easy for us to stay friends. I don’t tell my mom that Dalen sends me texts with photos of her friends in hopes to set me up on a date. The last thing I want my mom to do is team up with my ex to play matchmaker for me.

  Nick says, “Mom, Dad, we have another meeting to get to, so we’ll call you soon. Okay?”

  “Of course,” my mom replies, “we have some relaxing to do. Your dad has taken to retirement like frosting to a cupcake.” I feel like there’s a lost opportunity by not using crumbs to a cookie, but she never mentions cookies. It must be the curse of being named after the sweet treat. “Take care of yourselves and have some fun. Love you.”

  “Love you,” we both reply in unison.

  I look at my brother. “You realize it’s midday in California, right? Our parents are hot-tubbing it in the middle of a workday.”

  “I can only hope for such a glorious retirement.”

  He might have a point. “Coffee?”

  “Definitely.” He stands, ready to lead the way. “Break room or the coffee place downstairs?” Stopping just short of opening the door, he swears under his breath as he looks at his phone. “Shit. I can’t go. Barbara just added a call onto my schedule.”

  “Who’s Barbara?”

  “My new assistant.”

  “What happened to Emily?”

  He clicks his tongue. “She finally got the offer she was looking for.” I have a feeling he’s speaking in code, but it’s not something I care to riddle through right now. He adds, “Just a heads-up. I’m trying to wrap up a contract before the weekend. I may message you to help on this call. You have time?”

  “No, but I’ll do it if it’s important.”

  “It’s important.”

  “Then just let me know.”

  “Thanks, Andrew.”

  He disappears, leaving the door to my office cracked open. I can’t work with a lot of noise from the office. And although the Cave is usually the quiet side, something is stirring in the ranks. I get up but pause before I exit. I know the chatter will stop as soon as they see me. I won’t eavesdrop, but sometimes, I’d like to be in on the goings-on around here.

  Just as I step out, I overhear Justin from accounting ask Taylor, “Have you seen the new girl? She’s pretty hot. I think I’ll go introduce myself and offer to show her around the office, like the supply closet.”

  Taylor asks, “I thought you had a girlfriend?”

  “Always room for one on the side.” Justin laughs. Taylor doesn’t.

  Neither do I. Making my presence known, I clear my throat.

  Taylor ducks back into his cubicle, and Justin waves. Justin’s the brownnoser in the office. An accountant who’s gunning for my job. “Good afternoon, sir.”

  The corner of my eye ticks. I get that I’m the head of the company, but since I’m not quite thirty, being called sir still bugs me. Justin bugs me as well, but he’s given me no cause to fire him yet, and he’s good with numbers, so he remains. I’m hoping HR finally handles him. Naturally, none of them are around to hear him talk about this special tour he wants to give.

  “Afternoon,” I reply, now wondering who the new girl is. That’s a line I won’t cross, but he has my curiosity piqued.

  My assistant, Mary, asks, “Can I do something for you?”

  “No. I’m going to get a cup of coffee.”

  She’s quick to rise. “I can get that for you.”

&nb
sp; “It’s okay. I need the break.”

  “All right,” she replies, sitting down again. She was hired right before I moved here. We’re both still learning the ropes. She also does excellent work.

  When I enter the break room, I exchange greetings with two of my top human resources employees. Guess this is where Laurie and Joseph hide. Probably to get away from Justin. I chuckle at my joke.

  Laurie and Joseph have brought some of the top talent in the city to CWM over the past six months. I rely on them to add to the foundation we’ve laid and create a great work environment. Working with over a hundred unique personalities is never easy, and they allow me to stay out of the fray. Most of the time. “Just overheard Justin being crass about one of his coworkers.”

  As they wait for the microwave to finish heating their food, Laurie asks, “What did he say?”

  “He was talking about the new girl,” I say as if I’m knowledgeable to who that is.

  Joseph says, “I’ll remind him of the company policy to show due respect to all employees.”

  “Thank you.” I watch the coffee machine percolate but then turn to them as they whisper to each other. Trying for nonchalance, I ask, “Who’s the new girl?”

  Laurie replies, “We were just talking about her.”

  “I guess everyone is. Do I need to give you a warning?” I joke.

  Laurie is closer to my mom’s age, but she still blushes around me. This time her laughter precedes it. “That won’t be necessary. It’s the temp we hired to replace Melissa at reception while she’s on maternity leave. Joseph and I were saying that we’re hearing great things about her.”

  On cue, Joseph adds, “It’s only been three days, but she’s accomplished a week’s worth of tasks and done them well.”

  “While juggling the phones, I might add,” Laurie says. “She’s very impressive.”

  “That’s good to hear. Keep an eye on her. We’re always looking for exceptional employees.” And maybe a new accountant down the track.

  Joseph pops the microwave door open to remove his dish. “Melissa has been an asset to the front, but she wants to move upstairs to the brokerage division.” He turns to Laurie. “Maybe now is the time we consider it.”

  She says, “I agree. If things keep going the way they are with Ms. Jacobs, we definitely need to consider it. Let’s redefine the job description as well.”

  “I think Ms. Jacobs already has.” They sound giddy. Laurie turns back to me and says, “Have a nice day, Andrew.”

  “You too.”

  I walk back to my office with coffee in hand, tempted to detour to reception to meet this stellar Ms. Jacobs. I’m not that foolish, though. I set the mug on my desk as I settle into the late afternoon.

  As soon as my concentration returns, my phone screen lights up with a text from Nick. Are you available?

  My brother may be a punk half the time, but in business, he’s always shown me respect. I’ll be right there.

  A call that should have taken less than an hour kept us tied up for over two. When I returned to my office, I shuffled through a few emails and then got lost in the numbers on my screen. Mary checked in before leaving, but I lost track of time after that. I didn’t even notice my office was dark until the door opens, allowing light to flood in. Nick asks, “Why are you sitting in the dark?” and then flips on the light.

  Briefly blinded, I blink until my eyes adjust. “It wasn’t dark when I sat down. What time is it?”

  “Seven thirty.”

  “Phew. That’s good. I can still get some stuff done.” As he holds up the wall with his shoulder, I keep typing and ask, “Is there something I can help you with?”

  “How are you, brother?”

  My gaze shifts past the monitor. “It’s been two hours since I saw you. You already miss me?”

  Chuckling, he replies, “I miss partying with you when we had fewer cares. I miss hitting the waves at sunrise and then grabbing breakfast tacos from a food truck while trying to hustle to get to school on time.” I sit back and listen because I miss those times too. “But I’ve been thinking about what Mom said earlier, about taking you out.”

  “You don’t have to worry about me, little brother. I’m good . . . I’m fine.”

  “Yeah,” he says with little faith in my words. “I can tell.”

  My brother is one of my best friends, always has my back, and can read me like a damn book. But the thing is, I am fine. I am good. The way he’s staring at me like I grew a third eye in my forehead has me questioning my sanity, though. “What?”

  “You’re too uptight.”

  “I have good reason to be.” I drag the keyboard closer and return to my work.

  He makes himself at home on the other side of the desk, sitting there without a care in the whole fucking world. “You always have been, but if it’s possible, you seem tenser than usual. What gives? Work? The move? Let’s grab a drink and talk about it.”

  “Like you said, it’s only seven thirty.”

  Nudging the desk with his knee, he says, “I didn’t say only. Come on, Andrew. It’s Friday night, and no one’s left in the office but you.”

  “You’re here.”

  “I’m here because I need to suck up to my boss.”

  “Ha!”

  I’m given another shrug, and then he chuckles. “Only between these walls.” He stands again, and as he walks to the door, he says, “Come on. I’m meeting Jackson, and I can introduce you to The Watering Hole.”

  “Natalie’s brother, Jackson?”

  “Jackson St. James, himself. Did you know he’s brought on four new clients this month, and not one of them is investing under a mil?”

  I’m thinking he’s not going to let me get out of this despite leaning back like I’m not budging from this chair. “I did know, but what about Natalie?”

  “She has her own company.”

  “No.” I toss a pen across the office at him. “I mean, she’s not expecting you home?”

  He flicks the light off again. “Why do you think I’m still here?”

  I shake my head as the puzzle becomes clear. “Because besides Mom trying to marry me off, your wife is now sending you on the same mission? What is it with women not appreciating a single man? Maybe I’m fine being on my own. Not that anyone would know that since they don’t ask.”

  “Actually, Natalie called it a sympathy offer since all you do is work. Tomato. Tomahto, though. Am I right? Wrap up, and I’ll meet you at the elevators in five.”

  “What if I don’t—”

  The door closes before I have a chance to set a different proposal on the table—like me working another two or three hours and then going home. Ignoring him, I start analyzing the numbers on the screen again. I’m determined to figure out where the discrepancy is in this report.

  But a beer, a bar, and blowing off steam do sound tempting. I won’t give him the glory, but Nick’s probably right. I should get out. I’ve been following the same routine since I arrived in this city.

  Seattle kept me too busy to enjoy the fact that I was actually in Seattle. Am I going to repeat that mistake in New York? I might as well make the most of it since I won’t be here forever.

  Scanning the page on the screen, I realize there’s nothing I’m working on that can’t be handled over the weekend. I always work then anyway. I close it down and grab my jacket.

  Nick’s waiting at the elevators when I arrive. I hadn’t noticed earlier, but my brother’s looking sharp. “Nice suit,” I say.

  “Back atcha.”

  I can admit the Christiansen brothers clean up well, but even messy, we can pull more than our fair share of attention. Thanks for the good looks, Cookie and Corbin.

  He rests against the wall of the elevator as we ride down the twenty flights. I can feel the weight of his stare and turn back. “What is it?”

  Grinning, he says, “I’m glad you decided to come.”

  “You didn’t think I would?”

  It’s a s
ubtle shake of his head, but I notice. “I wasn’t sure.”

  Maybe I do owe him some credit. “Thanks for inviting me.”

  He reaches over and squeezes my shoulder. “Life’s passing by.”

  Nothing more needs to be said. I know they want me to be happy.

  Am I?

  I’m not sure if I’ve felt that emotion in a while. I’ll have to think about that.

  We travel the rest of the way in silence. Outside, we catch the last of the remaining daylight before the skyscrapers engulf it. “I’ve been here, what? Three weeks and you haven’t introduced me to your bar until now?”

  “It wasn’t for lack of trying.” He pats me on the back. “It’s around the corner.”

  It feels good to forget about work, to get out of the office, and not feel like I’m behind on a million things. I confess, “I miss the good ole days sometimes, too. What happened?”

  “Life got in the way.”

  “Work piled up.”

  I was busy earning my MBA while working my way up the corporate ladder. There were rumors I got the job based on my last name, and I’m not stupid enough to think that didn’t play a big part in it. But my dad had expectations of Nick and me. We exceeded them, and that’s why we’re here today. Not at the bar, but sitting atop a company that we’ve given our lives to.

  One night hanging out with my brother feels like old times. My mood has improved, and I’m actually looking forward to it. He says, “Let’s not let it get in the way again.”

  I shake his hand. “I’ll hold you to that if you’ll do the same for me.”

  “You’re on.” Holding the door open, he grins as if we’re about to enter a secret world that only he knows about. “This is where tycoons to tellers, day traders to corner shop owners hang out. You never know if you’re talking to a billionaire or someone just starting out in their career until you get into some drunken conversation with the stranger next to you. That’s what makes it so great.” He peers over the heads of the crowded bar and then adds, “Come on. You’ll fit right in.”