Fear Me

by B. B. Reid

  * * *

  “Blake said he has our supply ready for pickup.”

  “Good. You put the word out?”

  “Yeah, me and Dash are on it. He can’t make this run with us, though. His dad has him tied up with something. So what are you going to do with her?” I tried not to panic at the possible meaning of his question as I eavesdropped. Sheldon must not have closed the door all the way when she left because I could hear everything they were saying.

  “She comes with us. I can’t risk letting her out of my sight, at least not right now.”

  “What are you doing with her anyway?”

  “I’m getting my year back.”

  “She told me something today.”

  “Oh?”

  “Yeah, when I was playing guard,” he stated with sarcasm flooding his tone. “She told me she lost her cellphone the day the call was made. She asked me to believe her.”

  “Do you?” Keiran sounded disinterested but I could also hear the bitterness in his tone.

  “No—it’s just…she sounded pretty convincing and looked scared as hell. Did you do something to her? Say anything? You the other morning alone but showed up to school late with her.”

  “How do you know I showed up late?” he asked, ignoring his questions.

  “Come on man. When you show up to school with the one person everyone knows you hate, people talk. Not to mention she’s the hottest piece of ass at Bainbridge.”

  “Watch it,” he growled.

  “See what I mean? That! What is that? You claiming her now?” Keenan’s frustration increased the volume of his voice until he was yelling. I was curious to know myself why Keiran reacted so strongly.

  “You don’t want Sheldon to hear you say some shit like that. You are already on a tight leash as is.”

  “Yeah, well you let me worry about Sheldon. She’s beautiful; no doubt about it but Lake could give her a run for her money, that’s all.”

  “Doesn’t matter. I’m keeping an eye on her vindictive ass, nothing more.”

  “If you say so. Look, lets pick up the supply. Grab your girl. We got to drop Sheldon off at home. I don’t want her involved with this. Her pops would have me wasted.”

  “He might just do it himself,” Keiran laughed and just like his smile, I wanted to see and hear more of it. It made him appear human.

  I heard footsteps and quickly attempted to look as if I wasn’t just straining to eavesdrop. The door opened and I heard him walk inside. I twisted my body and saw a towel was wrapped around his waist as he stood by his dresser. When his hand dropped to the knot in his towel, I quickly looked away. The sound of the material hitting the carpeted floor forged a visual of his naked body to the forefront of my mind. I desperately fought the urge and temptation to look.

  Only when it was quiet and the rustling off his clothing ceased did I open my eyes. I didn’t even realize I’d closed them. I turned again to see that he put on jeans and a dark hoodie. I could see the little beads of moisture from his shower glistening on the dark strands of hair covering his head. He was pulling on a boot as I watched the muscles of his broad back ripple with his movements.

  “Are you taking me home now?” I asked hesitantly and despite what I just clearly heard. When his shoes were on his feet he stood up and finally glanced at me.

  “I have shit to do which means you’re a part of it.”

  “I can’t go anywhere with you. My aunt will want me to be home.”

  “Your aunt is thousands of miles away on her book tour and won’t be back for six weeks. Besides…she trusts your judgment.” I gaped at his smug face.

  “How would you know if she trusts me?”

  “I went through your text messages,” he answered as if it were perfectly okay to invade someone’s privacy. I wondered how much he might have gone through and if he’d seen the messages between Willow and me. Willow would check on me often throughout the day to make sure Keiran hadn’t gotten to me. It was a failed attempt being that he always found me no matter where I was but she was the best kind of friend.

  “I don’t feel comfortable going anywhere with you.”

  “And this is me not giving a fuck,” he said. He walked over to where I was sitting and released me from the cuffs. “Let’s go.” He moved toward the door, dismissing me. Anger and frustration like I never felt before flooded my senses. I wanted to argue.

  I needed to fight back.

  “No.” I ground out the word and sat down on his bed again with my arms crossed. I didn’t get a chance to rethink the danger of that move and the vulnerable state it placed me in, but he did. He froze with his hand above the knob. My heartbeat stuttered then slowed when he turned slowly to face me with a menacing expression plastered on his beautiful face.

  “I told you, you didn’t deserve my bed, but since you seem to want it now, I can accommodate you.” Fear and confusion wound its way into my mind when he took threatening steps toward me while reaching for his hoodie and tossing it over his head. When he reached the foot of the bed, I panicked and scrambled for the head, only making it halfway before he grabbed onto my ankle and dragged me, kicking and screaming, back to him. I was relieved when he released me but his next words made the panic come rushing back.

  “Take off the dress. You can get fucked on the floor,” he snarled. His gaze was stormy as he glared down at me. I watched his nostrils flare when I didn't move.

  “Why would I do that?” I fought to hold it together when all I wanted to do was run and hide.

  “Because I said so.”

  “Just take me home!” Frustration rose inside me and I let my tone reflect it.

  “Take it off. You have three seconds.”

  “But –”

  “One…”

  “I really don't –”

  “Two. Don’t make me get to three.”

  “Or what?” I challenged as a last resort.

  “I do it for you.” His hands grabbed my dress at the hem and the sound of ripping material had me grabbing his hands to stop him.

  “Ok!” I yelled in surrender and stood up. Our bodies were only a breath apart and I could feel the simmering heat from his anger and his body, penetrating my senses. My shaking hands rose to the straps of my dress, slipping them down slowly until my dress dropped to the floor with a whisper of sound. I kept my eyes lowered though I felt the weight of his gaze on my skin. I noticed his hands clench into fists and hold and I wished I had the courage to ask what he was thinking.

  “Kill the fucking act. You don't have anything I won’t see, and feel, and taste. Again…” My knees shook and my shoulders trembled at his harsh words. “…and again…”

  “Stop,” I pleaded.

  “…and again,” he continued. He looked me up and down before saying, “I’ve seen better. You don’t have anything special.” He then picked up my dress and tossed it at me for it only hit the floor again at my feet.

  A sound of distress escaped my throat and I rushed to pick up the pale yellow material and clutch it to my naked chest. With a look of disgust he stormed out of the room, the vibration of the door slamming echoing throughout the room.

  * * *

  “Turn here. He said he’d be in the quad,” Keenan directed. We’d just driven thirty minutes out to the local college. I wondered what the supply was that we came for. Keiran parked the car but kept the engine running. He watched me through the rearview mirror and held my stare. After he destroyed me emotionally in his bedroom I remained silent, wanting to lick my wounds in peace.

  “There he is,” Keenan exclaimed with excitement lacing his voice. He rubbed his hands together before jumping out of the car.

  Keiran continued to watch me even after Keenan was gone. When my nervousness began to show through my fidgeting, he smirked. “Stay here,” he ordered and then he was gone, breaking the connection he held me in.

  I watched through the backseat car window as the three men slapped hands and pounded each other’s backs in normal manly fa
shion. The guy who I assumed was Blake carried a small, black duffle bag. He handed the bag over, appearing casual when I was anything but. I stared at the black duffle bag, silently freaking out over the possibilities of its content.

  When they turned back to the car, Keiran placed the bag on the backseat floor. I could hear the muffled movements of what sounded like glass knocking around. The temptation to open the bag was strong and he must have known by the glare on his face.

  “Don’t touch it,” he warned and I realized Keiran was watching me along with Keenan and Blake.

  “I wasn’t going to,” I lied but instead of leaving like I thought he would, he sat down in the backseat. The space became smaller and suddenly there wasn’t enough air to breath. Why did I always feel the need to catch my breath when I was close to him?

  He slid over the seat until he was sitting directly next to me and shut the car door with a resounding thud. He then reached over me to lock the door with a click that was soft but rung loud in my ears. I pressed my back against the car door, my breath releasing fast and uneven. He palmed the back of my head and then his fingers slipped over the strands until he wound my ponytail around his hand lightly.

  “Say that again,” he demanded. His voice was calm but his eyes were not as he waited patiently for me to repeat myself. I reluctantly coughed back up the lie.

  “That’s what I thought you said,” he whispered just before a sharp pain emerged from my scalp. My head was tilted back far enough to block my view of him. “Lie to me again and I will hurt you, Monroe. I promise I will hurt you. There are worse pains than just the physical and I won’t hesitate to make you feel them. Do we understand each other?”

  I nodded as best as I could, with his grip on my hair. Just as fast as it happened it was over. He was out of the car again and walking back over to Blake, who watched me curiously. Keiran must have said something to him because he abruptly turned his head back to him.

  The campus was still occupied by a few students who were probably leaving a late class or studying in the library. The attention Keiran and Keenan were receiving from the loads of girls, who appeared out of nowhere, didn’t escape my attention. A few even stopped to talk and hand over a little slip of paper that I knew contained their number.

  I quelled the disgust I felt and willed myself not to feel anything remotely close to jealousy. That wasn’t possible. Instead I focused on the scenery and the obvious signs that fall was here. I loved when the leaves would turn color. The various browns, golds, and reds painted a beautiful, colorful canvas of the world, shielding the reality that it was as dark as my beautiful tormentor. At least that was what he was intent on teaching me.

  After a few minutes of ignoring the nauseous display of shameless girls parade in front of the group with short skirts and low tops, they finally made for the car. I was willing to bet they never even exchanged names. Girls are stupid.

  I pretended to pick my nails even after they got in the car and we left the college campus behind. When we got to the highway I still had not looked up from my nails and by this time I had nail polish shavings on my lap from picking at the paint. Full of spite, I cheerfully brushed the shavings all over the clean floor of his car.

  You could call it immature. I call it revenge. It was my own little way to say ‘fuck you’. I didn’t realize I laughed out loud until Keenan turned his head and looked at me funny. I quickly averted my gaze and stared out window watching the day give way to night.

  * * *

  When we arrived back in Six Forks, I fully expected to be driven home. Instead I found myself once again at Keiran’s house. I prayed for patience when he exited the car and opened the backdoor for what I assumed was the bag. Instead he pulled me out of the car and Keenan retrieved the bag from the backseat.

  With his hand on my arm I wasn’t brave enough to fight off his hold so I let him drag me into his house. Keenan followed behind us to deposit the bag before retreating back out the door. Moments later I could hear the rumble of a bike drive away.

  Realization dawned on me that I was now alone with Keiran. He had taken off for parts unknown in the house, leaving me standing in the entryway. I eyed the bag left by the door, tempted to go against his warning. What if he was dealing and he just took me on some kind of drug run? Either way I was screwed as either a witness or a participant. Depends on how the police would see if we had been caught.

  “What are you doing?” Keiran asked from behind me. I didn’t hear him approach and jumped before whirling around to face him with a guilty flush spreading over my skin.

  “What’s in the bag? Are you selling drugs?” I answered with a question of my own.

  When his jaw clenched, I thought he would lash out but when all he said was, “Call your aunt but make it quick and don’t try anything,” I was surprised. It was then that I noticed he was holding my phone in his hand.

  “Exactly what am I supposed to try? I love my aunt and I will do anything to protect her. Just because you don’t know the meaning of the word doesn’t mean it isn’t real.”

  Silence.

  “So, you’d do anything to protect her?” His tone was too calm as he slowly stepped forward. “Is that right?”

  “That’s what I said.”

  “Give me a blow job.” I felt something quicken inside me and my entire body blush.

  “What?”

  “You heard me the first time.” My eyes widened when he began unbuckling his belt. The familiar feelings of panic begin to set in as he continued to approach me. “On your knees. I want to feel those pretty pink lips on me.”

  “Don’t do this.”

  “I’m not. You are. Prove yourself and save your precious aunt.” His hand pushed me down until I was on my knees. My body became numb and my ability to think fled. I could hear his harsh words replaying over and over in my head. Would he really spare my aunt if I did it? Could I even go through with it?

  “Decide quickly. My offer won’t last forever.” His offer? Is that really how he saw it? More like coercion and blackmail.

  “I –”

  “It doesn’t require you to talk.” He lowered his jeans and boxers until they hung just around his hips. His cock had sprung out of the confines of his jeans and a shiver of apprehension ran through my body, while my eyes widened with shock and trepidation.

  His erection was long and thick with angry veins running the length. My attention was drawn to the pulsing head that had a bead of moisture shining on the tip. My belly had butterflies and my mouth and lips suddenly felt to dry. I licked my lips to moisten them and Keiran’s gaze zeroed in on my lips as I did. A low, throaty sound erupted from his lips as he watched me.

  He began a stroking motion, up and down while gazing down at me, daring me with his eyes. When I continued to hesitate he grabbed the nape of my neck and brought my lips closer. The tip of his cock touched my lips and he began rubbing it across slowly. I was shaking uncontrollably with an emotion and feeling that I couldn’t explain. But I did recognize shame. Shame that I wanted to taste him even though he only wanted to degrade me.

  “Ok, I’ll do it, but please be gent –”

  My words were lost when he plunged his cock into my mouth without warning. He continued to push forward with a groan and I immediately felt pressure at the back of my throat, causing me to gag. I instinctively closed my mouth around the intruding length to relieve the pressure but soon realized my mistake. My body heat rose in response to his aggression and I felt both fear and desire battle within me.

  Unfortunately, fear had won over and I put all my strength into ripping away from him by pushing against his strong thighs. “I can’t!” I cried out when my mouth was finally able to release him.

  He pushed me away and I fell to the floor, landing on my back and causing a loud smack to sound through the air. Rather than lashing out, he laughed. But it was full of anger and disgust as he looked down at me, nostrils flaring. “You can’t because you won’t. You’re no better than the re
st. You don’t give a damn about your aunt.”

  I panicked at the thought that I may have screwed up my aunt’s chances. “That’s not true. You scared me. I can do it. I’m –”

  “Nothing more than a fake. There isn’t anything innocent about you, is there Monroe?” he lips curled as he spit his harsh words at me.

  “Please, Keiran.”

  “Don’t…say…my…name. Ever.” I never understood why he forbid me to say his name. He was simply a mystery I may never solve. Before I could say anything further the front door opened and I froze.

  “What the hell?”

  “Dude…”

  “Shit.”

  I recognized the sound of Sheldon, Dash and Keenan’s voice behind me, in that order. We were still in the hall when he had forced me on my knees so the door had opened up right on us.

  Keiran continued to stare at me while righting his jeans and appearing unfazed by the intrusion. Embarrassment flooded my cheeks and I was glued to the spot. Though Keiran was the only one exposed it was apparent what had taken place. I was no longer lying on the floor when they arrived but I was still on my knees.

  Everyone had grown quiet. The humiliation of my situation was overwhelming and then I was crying again. I was always crying. When would I fight back?

  “That’s enough. Lake, get up.” Sheldon tugged on my arm until I was standing but I kept my gaze lowered. She then turned on Keiran. “What the hell is wrong with you? She may be afraid of you, but I’m not. If I catch you doing some shit like this to her again I will kick your ass. If I find out there was foul play, I will turn you in myself. Got it?”

  “Foul play? You mean rape?” he asked in a sarcastic tone. “I don’t rape. But then, Monroe and I both know I wouldn’t have to. She’d give it up and I wouldn’t hesitate to take anything she offered.”

  I hugged my waist and listened to him insinuate that I wanted him. I didn’t want him. He was my enemy…or maybe it was just my body that desired him while my mind feared him. I just wished I knew what it was about him that made my body betray me in such a confusing way.