Choices will Destroy (An FBI Romance Thriller Book 14)

by Morgan Kelley

  Callen glanced down at the baby bump and did the only thing he could. He hit the gas.

  It said it all, as he navigated the streets of Damascus toward FBI West.

  “I’ve got you, angel. We’ll handle this. The mother of my children is NOT going to jail—over my dead body.”

  She hoped he was right.

  Only, all she could feel was dread. Elizabeth Whitefox-Blackhawk was screwed.

  And not in a good way.

  * * * B l a c k h a w k - W h i t e f o x * * *

  FBI West

  Mid-Morning

  Ethan Blackhawk was just finishing some paperwork in his office. Mondays were a bitch when it came to working, but he didn't mind taking on the extra responsibility. It was for his family, and that’s all that mattered to him.

  Right then, at that moment, he knew his brother and wife were working hard on Callen’s rehabilitation.

  That had to come first.

  Picking up the slack was a no brainer on his behalf.

  Truth be told, no one was having an easy time of it the last two months. With Callen being down, they had to shuffle everything around to accommodate him being the ONLY director on duty. In fact, Ethan had to handle some Native relations, and it wasn’t fun.

  He hoped Callen came back to work, and soon. If not, he was going to be heading to the reservation to handle some jackassery.

  That didn't sit well with him.

  This was why he gave Callen the job in the first place. Ethan wasn’t cut out to play with the Natives. It simply wasn’t his cup of tea. Just because he had the hair and skin tone, didn't mean he was equipped with patience to deal with it.

  He wasn’t.

  Hell!

  It was the antithesis of everything he saw himself to be.

  Ethan had more than enough BS to handle without throwing in some riled up Native chief. His ME’s were trying to order everything under the sun, his head anthropologist was away on some dig for his honeymoon, and he was holding the place together with bubblegum and popsicle sticks until Elizabeth was back.

  If anything else came up, they were officially screwed. Ethan couldn’t wait until his wife, or brother, came back to work. He was overwhelmed with work.

  Actually, truth be told, Ethan missed having Elizabeth perched on the corner of his desk. With each hour apart, he longed to be back with the two people he loved more than anything in life.

  He wanted them back in their offices, raising hell, and stirring up the HR department. Considering the options, he’d rather them be there than not.

  He was lonely.

  Yeah, he had to be desperate to want to go there. He really missed working side by side with his wife. She was trouble, but some sick and depraved part of him loved it. The way her blue eyes twinkled, it made him feel incredibly lucky to have found her, even when she was stirring up the HR pot. At least with her there, he could be sure she was safe.

  All day, he’d had that sick feeling brewing in the pit of his stomach. Then, to make it worse, when he was in the breakroom getting coffee, he saw it.

  On the window ledge, there was a huge raven. It had watched him with its beady black eyes. The creepy bird tracked him across the room never looking away. Frankly, it freaked him out.

  It reminded Ethan of Salem, the trouble that found them, and nearly losing his wife.

  He couldn’t go there again.

  She was his everything.

  Needing a break, Ethan leaned back in his chair and stared at the picture of the three of them on his bookshelf. They had just found out the sex of their next child, and they were all smiles.

  That day was one of his favorite memories.

  His brother’s smile had been infectious. It filled them all with such joy. He couldn’t believe they were adding their fifth child to the family in a couple months. Six years ago, he was single, and alone.

  Now he had peace.

  His kids gave him that. With three boys, two girls, and all under five years old, you wouldn’t think that was possible, but it was.

  It was pandemonium in their home, and he loved every damn second of it. His wild tribe of Natives was so very important to him as a father and man. As he grew up, Ethan didn't know what it was like to have a big family. When his mother died, it was just him, Callen, and granddad.

  They were a rag tag trio, trying to make the best of the life they had been given. Most of the time, Timothy spent his days trying to keep them in school and out of jail at night. It wasn’t easy for any of them, but especially the old man.

  They made him work for it.

  Every day was a challenge.

  “Oh, Granddad, you were a saint,” he said, laughing to himself. They really ran the poor man ragged. “If you were here, I’d buy you anything your heart desired. I didn't realize how hard this job was until I had all these kids relying on me.”

  Yeah, now he got it.

  Kids, while a blessing, were also a handful. Technically, they now had more kids than adults in the house. Once the new baby came, it would be four adults to five kids. The savage Natives would have them outnumbered.

  They were screwed.

  Yet, he loved it.

  Ethan Blackhawk wouldn’t change a thing about his life. Instead, he was proud of what they’d made together. His family was unique, special, and all his—and Callen’s.

  They had a kick-ass wife, five healthy little ones, and Wyler too. It was a good gig, and they were blessed beyond their wildest dreams.

  Now…

  If only he had backup in the office. Then life would be so much easier.

  Standing, Ethan stretched. On a whim, he pulled his black hair from the tie holding it back. If his wife was there, she’d be running her fingers through it. Now that they were fully outed in the world, he didn't worry so much what others thought.

  Ethan loved both Elizabeth and Callen being near. There was something cathartic about the warm embrace of the two people he loved.

  He wouldn’t trade it for the world.

  Just as he pondered grabbing a coffee and taking a break from the mundane tasks at work, he heard the running.

  Immediately, his heart began pounding in his chest. When his wife and brother appeared in his doorway, her face said it all.

  Something had happened.

  He nearly couldn’t breathe.

  “Lyzee, baby, are you okay?” he asked, crossing to them without even hesitating. Elizabeth looked like she was ready to cry, and he didn't understand why. In fact, Callen had a very similar look of worry on his face.

  It scared the hell out of him on some deep level. The spouse in him was scared shitless. His family was rattled, and that couldn’t be good.

  “We need to talk.”

  He opened his mouth.

  “Now,” she said, as Callen closed and locked the door behind them.

  For that brief second, Ethan prayed this was some ruse and they were going to have some sexy liaison in his office. They’d yet to have a threesome there.

  Them having sex in the office was proof of how rattled he was. That was his big no-no, and they knew it. His willingness meant one thing.

  His head and gut already knew it was going to be bad.

  “Baby, what’s wrong?”

  She didn't hesitate.

  Instead, she rushed right into his arms. As she clung to his body, Callen followed her, pressing her between them. As they remained locked together, Ethan’s heart began thundering in his chest. With each second they held out, it was like torture for him. Ethan wanted to soothe his loved ones.

  “Are the kids okay? Is dad hurt?”

  A million things began rushing through his mind, and he was freaking himself out over each and every one of them.

  This was going to be bad.

  He could feel it.

  “I’m in trouble,” she said, her face pressed into his neck. As she tried to breathe in the scent of husband, struggling to find calm, Elizabeth didn't know what to do.

  She nee
ded them more than ever in her life.

  Her choices in the past were about to rear their ugly heads, and no one was safe.

  Not Gabe.

  Not Livy.

  Not them.

  The game had just changed.

  “Okay, just tell me what it is, and I’ll see if I can solve it for you,” he offered.

  Ethan couldn’t recall ever seeing her this worried. In fact, she was shaking in his arms. That was unnerving. Elizabeth Blackhawk didn't scare easily. Tex had faced down killers, assholes, and frightening things without batting an eyelash. Terrified wasn’t in her vocabulary.

  Until now…

  Apparently, it was.

  Ethan led them toward his big leather couch. Gently, he took a seat, only to have his wife follow into his lap. Still, she didn't let go. The clinging to his dress shirt was borderline frantic. Her fists were balled in the pricy cotton, and she refused to let go.

  Oh boy…

  He wanted to puke.

  “Tell me what’s wrong.”

  “I got a call from Gabe.”

  He didn't get it. Gabriel Rothschild loved Elizabeth. They were a family before Callen or Ethan rolled into her life. In fact, Gabe was loyal and had their back. The last few months were rocky, but they were on solid ground once again.

  “I need more, baby. What did he say to freak you out this badly?”

  The tears came.

  This was her one fear. Elizabeth lived her life to serve and protect, but that one line she crossed years ago haunted her. The day she opted to go rogue had changed everything.

  It changed her life.

  It made her cold and calculating.

  It created a killer.

  This wasn’t a mistake. It was a conscious choice that destroyed any hope of a safe existence. Forever would this haunt her life, and she hated it.

  She’d screwed up.

  Now she’d pay.

  The young Lyzee had made a huge mistake. When she pulled that trigger, she destroyed so much. There was always a little piece of her that thought this would come back to find her, and here it was.

  She’d broken the law, stolen a life, and played judge, jury, and executioner.

  Literally.

  Now, she was going to have to pay for her sins, much like the criminals she hunted. No one was above the law.

  Callen knew she was scared. “Remember when she told us about that one thing that she did that wasn’t so sterling?”

  Ethan thought back to it. “In Red River?”

  He nodded.

  “Yes, how could I forget? It’s not every day that the woman you love admits to something like that.”

  Callen spared her having to repeat it again. This time, he told Ethan everything that Gabe had said to her. He left nothing out.

  Immediately, Ethan’s face went cold. “What do you mean he’s back?”

  Elizabeth glanced up. “I killed him, Ethan. I know it was wrong, but Gabe said he’s back. There’s a body in his yard, the letter admitting it’s him, and the medallion. It’s all there. This can’t be a prank. There are too many similarities. No one knew about the medallion.”

  Ethan’s blue-black eyes met Callen’s brown ones. A silent message was passed between them. There was no way in hell anyone was taking their pregnant woman from them. Yes, she broke the law, but they’d have to go through them first. Elizabeth had dedicated her life to upholding justice. It was all because of that fateful night. She bled for the FBI because of it, and as far as they were concerned, she’d done her time for the crime.

  “Are you sure it was him?” he asked.

  “We had a profiler give us the heads up. He led us right to him. He fit everything down to a T.”

  Ethan swallowed.

  It was all coming back to him.

  He’d given Gabe a profile for the ‘Irish Butcher’. It was early in his career, and he’d been on a work bender. Any case he could help on, he took, and he never realized that he was the one who pointed Elizabeth down this path.

  He started to feel sick.

  “Livy said it was him. I worked that case and knew it was him. The man lied, and I tracked him down. There have been no killings since that day, and now fifteen years later it starts back up? I couldn’t have been wrong, could I?”

  Callen ran his good hand up and down her back. “It’s okay, angel. We have you.”

  “I can’t go to jail,” she whispered. “I have my babies. They need me. I need them. I don’t want to die without them.”

  The men knew how serious this was.

  “Gabe told her she has to investigate this or someone else will. Our only saving grace is that he’s still the boss man. He has it under control for now,” Callen offered.

  Blackhawk totally got it.

  If anyone else worked this case, then there would be the risk that the truth would come out. If this was the killer, resurfacing, they had to hope that no one would find out the truth. As far as he knew, only Gabe, Elizabeth, Callen, and himself knew that she’d done the deed.

  They were going to keep it that way.

  No matter what, they would be taking this to their graves.

  Normally, he wouldn’t want them out in the field, but it looked like they didn't have a choice. They were going in to save their woman.

  “So let’s get ready to go. I’ll call dad and let him know we’re heading out. Callen, get to the house and have Cindy help you pack up our gear. We’ll need to grab our clothes, you both need a sidearm, and I’ll grab our Kevlar. If this is the ‘Irish Butcher’, and he’s back, we’re going to make sure this time he stays dead. This time, we’re taking him down once and for all.”

  Callen jumped up, dropped a kiss to her lips, and then gave her a reassuring smile. “You’re safe. If we have to, we’ll get you hidden. No one is taking you away from us. We promise. If worse comes to worse, we all go under on some reservation somewhere.”

  She sniffled.

  Ethan patted his brother on the arm. “Go, Callen. I want to be in the air in less than one hour. We have a lot of work to do.”

  Callen rushed out, and Ethan headed to his desk. “I’m going to call Gabe.”

  “We need to bring in one of our ME’s,” she said. “I don’t trust people we don’t know, Ethan. Gabe has his people, and I have mine.”

  “Okay, then we do it,” he stated. “Who are you bringing?”

  She thought about it. “Chris. He was there. He was the original ME on duty. That was our first big case together. I trust him.”

  “What if you have to tell him?” he asked. “Do you think he’ll keep it quiet?”

  Elizabeth closed her eyes and thought back to that case. Her life was vastly different now, and it seemed like so long ago. Yet, not a day went by that she didn't recall the entire thing. That one defining moment had been a reoccurring nightmare for her.

  There was before she pulled the trigger.

  And there was after she pulled it.

  Her life was divided into two timeframes.

  That one choice changed everything for the fifteen years to follow.

  “Lyzee?” he asked again, breaking her daydream. “Can we trust him?”

  “Yes, we can. I’d put my life in his hands. Back then, when it all went to shit, Chris was the only one who had my back. If it weren’t for him, I’d never have gotten through it. When I was broken, Chris nursed my heart back from the brink.”

  Ethan thought about it. “Okay, talk to him. We’ll see what happens, and when we can’t keep him out anymore, we’ll let him in.”

  She agreed.

  Ethan handed her a tissue. “I’ll call Gabe. Why don’t you head down to the lab? I think we should bring Merry too.”

  Elizabeth wiped her eyes and nodded.

  “Okay, Ethan.”

  “It’s going to be okay, baby. I swear to you that I won’t let you fall under this. I’m going to help you fix it. I’m going to wash this stain from your hands once and for all.”

  “I
wish I’d met you back then,” she said, standing. “Maybe you would have changed my life. Maybe I wouldn’t have done this had I had a decent man like you in my life.”

  His heart skipped.

  Oh, God!

  His wife must not know the truth about all of this. Elizabeth didn't have a clue that he was the profiler who left the information on her desk for Gabe.

  He’d given her the advice that led her right to the man she killed.

  Ethan could feel his heart squeezing in his chest. All he could hope now was that she’d not hate him for it. How could he not feel responsible?

  When his wife left, he picked up the phone and made the call. Gabe answered on the first ring.

  His voice said it all.

  “How bad is this?” Ethan asked. “I need to know before we roll into this mess.”

  Gabe got quiet. “I’m assuming that you know everything. Did she fill you in?”

  “Yes.”

  “It’s bad, Ethan. I have a destroyed body in my back yard. To make it more high profile, it’s the man I worked under and eventually replaced. His body wasn’t put here by accident.”

  He didn't doubt that in the least.

  Ethan had a sick feeling that this was about to go bad, and fast.

  “We’ll be there. I’m bringing in Chris Leonard to do the autopsy. Keep your people away from the victim.”

  “Oh, Jesus! This is like my worst nightmare. I used to ride his ass about being a shitty ME, and now he’s going to hold all of our lives in his hands. That’s ironic. I hope you have control over him.”

  “I don’t need it. He’s loyal to Elizabeth.” Ethan knew how true that was. Chris Leonard loved his wife. They were bonded well before he arrived on the scene.

  They were family.

  Now he saw why.

  This built the foundation of their lives.

  “I have to stay calm.”

  “You have no choice, Gabe. We’re on our way.”

  There was a pause as he said something to someone who knocked on his door. Then he was back on the phone. “We’re locking down my back yard. I have agents keeping it secure, and as of yet, there hasn’t been a media leak. I’ll keep this contained as long as I can, Ethan. You three just get here.”