Ivy in the Shadows

by Chris Woodworth

  “Oh!” I said.

  “Ugh! Look what you did!” Alexa pointed to my mess.

  “My bad,” Brandon said, but Alexa stalked off toward the kitchen.

  Brandon crouched down to help me pick up the chips. He had on one of those watches with the big dials and I saw that it looked like it was twelve o’clock. I grabbed his arm and tilted my head so the watch wasn’t upside down. Six-thirty!

  “I’m sorry! I … I’ve got to go,” I stammered. I made my way through the crowd and had reached the front door when Alexa came dragging Ellen into the room. Ellen was pulling yellow rubber gloves on and her once perfectly straightened hair was curling from sweat. Under her arm was tucked a hand broom and dustpan.

  All this flashed through my mind in a millisecond as I tried to get out the door. I’d almost made it when a girl I didn’t know pointed to me and asked, “Who is she?”

  Alexa looked at me and said, “Her? She’s Ellen’s date.”

  I blasted through the door just as a wave of laughter washed over the room. I didn’t dare look back at Ellen.

  Running through the alley, I held on to the hope that I’d beat Mama home, but when the house came into view, there was Mama’s car. I was almost to my front door when Caleb came out of nowhere and grabbed my arm, pulling me off the sidewalk into the yard.

  “Let go, freak!” I yelled.

  “Shhh!” he said.

  “Shoosh yourself! And don’t ever grab me like that again!”

  “Listen,” he said, and then lowered his voice to a whisper. “You’ve been home. You found a bird’s nest on the ground out back. You were keeping guard until the baby birds flew away.”

  He thrust a nest into my hand. At that moment Aunt Maureen and Mama came out onto the porch.

  “Young lady,” Aunt Maureen said, “you’re late!”

  “What’s this about?” Mama asked. “Ivy, where have you been?”

  I hesitated for a minute, then the words came out of my mouth on their own. “I’ve been home. I found a bird’s nest on the ground out back. I’ve been keeping guard until the baby birds flew away.”

  Mama looked at the nest in my hand. Her face softened because Mama loved all living things so. “Why, Ivy! What a sweet thing to do. Come here, you.” She wrapped her arms around me in a hug.

  My head spun a little. I think it was because so much had happened in such a short time. I should have been mad at Caleb for a lot of things. I should have been ashamed of myself for lying. I should have worried that I hadn’t already shown Mama my new clothes. But all I knew was that Mama was hugging me and I wasn’t in trouble and it was a really nice feeling.

  “Come inside.” She took the nest from me and set it in a bush, put her arm around me, and led me up the steps and into the living room. “Can you believe your aunt Maureen is here? I don’t think I’ve ever been happier.”

  “Then you lead one boring life, Cass.” Aunt Maureen looked at Mama and raised her eyebrows. “Besides, my memory is good and I know for a fact you’ve had some happier moments. Just none that are G-rated.”

  She and Mama both broke into loud laughter.

  “JJ’s in his room playing so all you have to do is get over here and take a load off while Ivy, Caleb, and I do the dishes.”

  Mama raised her feet onto the couch and sighed. “I’d argue but I’m too tired and grateful.”

  Caleb followed Aunt Maureen into the kitchen. “Be right there!” I called, and ran upstairs to get out of the clothes Ellen had bought me before Mama noticed them. When I headed to the kitchen, I passed Mama but her eyes were closed and she had a small smile on her face.

  In the kitchen, Aunt Maureen already had the sink filled with soapy water.

  “Caleb, you bring us the dirty dishes. I’ll wash,” she said. “Ivy will dry and put them away.”

  Then she lowered her voice. “And while we’re all nice and busy, you’ll both tell me what that bird lie was about.”

  Caleb and I froze. Aunt Maureen let out a low, barklike laugh. “Kids, I am not Cass Henry. I don’t get all dewy-eyed over a baby bird story and I can smell a lie a mile away. You’re not in trouble yet and I won’t tell Cass unless it involves a dead body or stealing, but you are going to spill the beans.”

  Before I could say anything, Caleb jumped in. “I found the nest, ma’am.”

  “And that’s all well and good but that doesn’t explain why Ivy was late, now does it, Caleb?”

  “I’m sorry, Aunt Maureen. I should have watched the time more.”

  “And what exciting things were you doing that made time fly?” she asked.

  “Well…” I gulped. “I did go see my friend, just like I told you.”

  “And?”

  I wondered how it was possible for her to look at me so long and not blink.

  “And…” I weighed my options. She said she wouldn’t tell Mama but I knew there wasn’t much she and Mama didn’t share. My mind was totally blank. I couldn’t think of any good excuse for being late. Besides that, I was tired of lying. I kept catching everyone else in lies and here I was, doing it, too.

  “I went to a party.” I told the truth but I couldn’t look her in the eye.

  “Did something happen at this party?”

  “No, not really.”

  “So what’s the problem then?” she asked.

  “There were boys there.”

  “It wouldn’t be much of a party if there weren’t.”

  “Mama won’t let me go to parties with boys.” I kept my head down and my hair covered my hot face.

  “Is this a joke?” she asked, putting one hand on her hip. “Cass Henry won’t let her daughter go to parties with boys?”

  “No, ma’am. It’s no joke,” I said.

  Then she let loose with a loud laugh. Mama’s voice came in from the living room. “Don’t y’all be having so much fun without me.”

  Here it comes, I thought, and braced for Aunt Maureen to tell Mama why she’d laughed. But she said, “You just rest, Cass. I’m only laughing at how clumsy I am tonight. I’ve got a case of the dropsies.” She lowered her voice again, crossed her arms over her chest, and leaned back against the sink. “So, like mother like daughter.”

  “I’m like Mama?” I asked.

  She tilted her head left to right, like she couldn’t decide. “More like Cass is like her mother.”

  “Mama sneaked out for parties?” I asked. This didn’t fit with the Mama I knew but I guess I’d never heard her talk to Aunt Maureen about what it was like to be my age.

  “I don’t want to go there, Ivy. That’s up to your mom. Just answer me this. Did you kiss a boy tonight?”

  “No!” I said, absolutely horrified.

  “Are you sure?”

  “Aunt Maureen! I didn’t even want to be there! I was afraid of losing Ellen as my friend if I didn’t go and that’s the truth.”

  She pushed up off the sink and said, “Then I see no reason your mama needs to know. I’m not saying you should disobey her but we’ve all been in spots like you are in now, Ivy. But you tell your Aunt Maureen the truth, young lady. If I ask where you’re going, I damn well want to know.”

  “Yes, ma’am.”

  “And I think your goose would have been cooked with your mother if Caleb hadn’t stepped in to help. He even told her he knew you were home before you really were. So I suppose you owe him, but, Caleb.” Her eyes slid to him. “I’m giving you the same warning I told Ivy. Don’t lie to me again, young man.”

  Good luck with that, I thought. But I bit my tongue. After all, he’d lied to help me. Not that I wanted his help, you understand. Not at all. But, still …

  12

  Later that night, Mama and Aunt Maureen were curled up on each end of the couch, their hands wrapped around coffee mugs. A person would think that, as much talking as they did on the phone, there wouldn’t be anything left to talk about, but they were deep in discussion when Caleb and I went upstairs to get ready for bed.

  �
��Caleb, wait,” I said. “You’ve got me confused. Why did you help me?”

  “Your mother was upset.”

  “That’s not what I asked.”

  “I knew you were going to the party, and I also knew that, if you told your aunt you’d be home by six-thirty, you’d do your best.”

  “How did you know about the party? Have you been spying on me?”

  “When things are said in front of you, is hearing them considered spying?” he asked.

  I thought about his question and about how Mama was always talking to Aunt Maureen in front of me. Sure, it was spying when I picked up the phone and listened, but I didn’t think it was spying when I was in the same room and she said things that I heard.

  “No, I don’t think that’s spying.”

  “You talked to Ellen on the phone about the party. I went upstairs to put my gift card in my room before helping with dinner and I heard you. I wasn’t spying.”

  “But that’s not all,” I said. “You also had a ready-made excuse for me to not get into trouble.”

  “My parents … they always tried to help people. That’s what I do now. I try to help.”

  “If you wanted to help so dang much and you knew I was at Alexa’s, why didn’t you come and get me?”

  He looked down at his feet. I wondered if he was ever going to answer me but then he said, “Do you really think anyone there would have let me in?”

  Would they? I pushed the question out of my mind but not before I realized that the answer was no, they probably wouldn’t have.

  * * *

  You’d think a person should be able to sleep in on a Saturday but, as I mentioned before, not in our house. I woke to a buzzing sound and I reached for my alarm clock. I hit the snooze button, but it kept going. I reached again and knocked it off the table, sending it kerthunking onto the floor.

  I groaned and woke up enough to pull it by the cord back onto the table. That’s when I realized the sound I heard was the doorbell. I rolled out of bed and made it halfway downstairs when I heard Aunt Maureen talking through the screen door. It was pretty easy to see by her mussed hair and silk robe that whoever had come calling had woken her, too.

  I squatted on the step and listened.

  “Now, I don’t want to be mean but we don’t want any pamphlets if you really are from a church. I thought you boys traveled in pairs with white shirts and backpacks.”

  “I’m not a Mormon!”

  “Well, I really don’t care what church you’re from. If we want to go to church, we’ll find one. Goodbye.”

  She started to shut the door.

  “Wait! Mrs. Henry knows about this.” It was Pastor Harold’s voice.

  “Well now, I was up half the night with Ms. Henry and she didn’t say anything about going to church on Saturday.”

  I raced down the steps. “He’s right, Aunt Maureen! Mama told him she’d work at the church kitchen this morning.”

  “Oh, for heaven’s sake. I’m going back to bed,” she said.

  “Come on in, Pastor Harold. I’ll get Mama.”

  He stepped inside and I raced past Aunt Maureen on the stairs. Mama wasn’t in her room so I knocked on the bathroom door.

  “Mama! It’s nine o’clock and Pastor Harold is here. You told him you’d be ready to work at the church at nine. Remember?”

  Mama opened the door, tying the sash on her robe. “Oh my goodness! Go stall him for me.”

  I ran back downstairs. “She’s getting ready now, Pastor Harold. Want me to get you some coffee?”

  “Sure, coffee would be nice.”

  I hurried into the kitchen and pushed the button on the coffeemaker since Mama always put the water and coffee grounds in the night before. Then I got down a mug and the sugar bowl.

  “You can sit while it brews,” I said.

  “Thank you.” He pulled out a chair and smiled at me. “You’re a good hostess.”

  Which made me feel way better than it probably should have.

  “Don’t pay any mind to Aunt Maureen. She just got here from Georgia. She’s been Mama’s friend for eons.” I was glad to use a word that made me sound like a “hostess” instead of a kid in an outgrown nightgown.

  “Oh, that’s fine. No one likes to be woken up. I know I don’t.”

  I poured coffee into his cup and he nodded his thanks.

  “By the way, is Caleb around?” he asked. “I’d like to talk to him.”

  “He’s probably still in bed like I was.”

  “So I woke you, too? And you’re even nice about it.” His eyes had those little crinkles in the corners again.

  I set the pot back on the warmer so it would stay hot for Mama. “Well, I’m sure my mom will be back shortly. I’ll go get dressed now.”

  And I took off. I met Mama in the hall, smoothing a sweatshirt down over her jeans.

  “Do I look all right?” she asked.

  “For making noodles? Who cares?”

  “Well, I care!”

  “You could wear your pajamas to make noodles with old ladies, Mama.”

  “They’re not all old ladies, Ivy. And Pastor Harold will be there.”

  “So?”

  “So, I’m just saying I want to look nice, that’s all,” she said as she hurried on past me.

  The phone rang and Aunt Maureen groaned from the bedroom she was sharing with Mama. “Good Lord, this place is a zoo!”

  I quickly picked it up and whispered, “Hello.”

  “I just wanted to say thanks for nothing, Ivy.” It was Ellen. “Because of you, everyone thinks I’m a lesbian. And not only that, you ran out on me last night!”

  “But neither one of us knew that ‘guest’ meant boyfriend, Ellen!”

  She started bawling. There’s no getting through to her when she’s a mess like that.

  “How about I come over and we can talk about it?” I said.

  “Don’t bother! If you couldn’t stay when I needed you, what good does it do me now?”

  “Oh, come on, Ellen! I went to the party, didn’t I? I mean, I had to leave before you, but still, I came. And it’s not like you cared that I was there, anyway. You weren’t even around.”

  “I told you I had to help!”

  “Help do what? Clean up messes? That’s not what guests do.”

  “You have no idea how hard it is to be in Alexa’s group, do you? You have to earn that spot and you just thought you’d sail into it through me. Well, Ivy, I don’t need you. I don’t want to be seen with you ever again!”

  And she hung up the phone! I just kept talking, saying stuff like “Wait a minute!” and “You can’t hang up like that!” which was stupid because she wasn’t there to hear me. And who cared about Alexa’s “group”? I didn’t even know she had a group. It sounded like she was lead singer in a band or something, not just the queen of a dumb bunch of girls who followed her around. Why would I want to be part of that?

  I was brushing my teeth when the phone rang again. I spit and ran into the hall, ready to give Ellen a piece of my mind, when I heard Aunt Maureen’s voice.

  “I told you I wouldn’t be there, Sonny … Yes, I know I’ve threatened before but this time it’s different. Cass needs me. And, honestly, even if she didn’t, things haven’t been good between you and me for quite a while.”

  I peeked around the corner and she was leaning against the wall, her pajamas still on.

  “Oh, Sonny. You know I loved you. I probably still do but I can’t come back. I’m so lonely and you’re never there. I just can’t go on this way.” She hung up the phone and wiped tears from under her eyes. I hurried to the bathroom, hung my toothbrush on the rack, then met her in the hall.

  “Morning, sunshine. Is it always this busy around here?”

  Her eyes were red and she sounded like she had a cold but I pretended not to notice. “Not usually.”

  “Thank gawd! I don’t think I could take it.”

  She tried to act like the fun Aunt Maureen, the one who didn’t
care about anything. Like her heart wasn’t broken, but I knew it was. I had a queasy feeling in my stomach for both her and Uncle Sonny—just like I did when Jack Henry broke Mama’s heart.

  * * *

  I washed the breakfast dishes since Aunt Maureen had cooked. She had Caleb running the sweeper and JJ dusting the big, unbreakable pieces of furniture, which was a miracle in itself. When we finished, JJ asked Caleb to go with him to see the “hungry Haitians” by Harmony Street Blues.

  “Who?” I asked.

  “The people Daddy showed me. The ones who don’t have houses or money.”

  “They don’t have houses so that means they’re homeless, JJ. You have no business going there at all, not even with Caleb.”

  “You’re mean!” JJ called as he ran outside.

  I turned to Caleb. “You go get him. You’re the one putting ideas in his head.”

  Caleb left, and through the open door I saw Pastor Harold’s silver ball of a car pull up. He got out and opened Mama’s door for her. I watched them from the window. Mama leaned back against his car and smiled a lot. Then they both really laughed. They talked a bit longer and then she must have asked him in. I jumped back from the window, flopped down on the couch, and grabbed a magazine like I’d been reading it instead of trying to read their lips.

  “Have a seat,” Mama said. “I’ll get that iced tea.”

  I looked over the top of the magazine. Pastor Harold chuckled.

  “What’s so funny?” I asked.

  He lifted the magazine out of my hands and rotated it.

  “It might read easier right side up,” he said.

  I felt my face getting warm.

  “That’s okay. Spying on grownups was always my favorite pastime, too.”

  “I don’t spy!” I said.

  “Well, paying attention to them,” he said. “How’s that?”

  “I haven’t seen any grownups come around here who are worth paying attention to,” I said.

  He laughed. “Ivy, you’re all right.”

  “So I’ve been told.”

  “Maybe you haven’t been paying attention to me but I have to you. I listened to your concerns about Caleb.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Yeah. I decided that, interim pastor or no, I should know more about my flock.”