The Roommate Agreement

by Emma Hart

  “Although,” she went on. “You should have figured that out maybe before you had sex.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Listen—we’d already crossed the line. We’d both admitted how we felt. Going on a date with him was fun, Brie. It was the most fun I’d ever had with anyone, and it felt right.”

  “Then why not just be in a relationship? I know you’re a bit of a relationship-phobe—”

  “I am not a relationship-phobe!” I pulled my glass of Coke toward me. “I’m just…reserved with my emotions, but he already knows how I feel. It’s not like we’re getting into a normal relationship. We live together. We’re going from zero to one-hundred, and we need to ease ourselves into that.”

  “Did you sleep in your bed last night?”

  “Yes.”

  “Were you alone?”

  I shoved a chicken tender in my mouth. “No comment,” I said around a mouthful of food.

  Brie smirked. “So you’ve had sex twice. You’re at least at the fuck-buddy stage of being in a relationship. Fuck buddies with feelings. That’s sticky.”

  “Yeah, and it’s sticky before feelings,” I muttered. “Regardless, I don’t see why we need to label it. Why can’t we just figure it out as it happens? Let it evolve naturally?”

  “I think you’ve realized what you’ve done and now you’re trying to backpedal,” she said, putting down the half of her burger she’d been holding. She turned knowing eyes on me. “Your issue ever since you told me you had feelings for Jay was the fact he was your best friend. It was all centered around that. Not the fact that you had them—the fact you had them for him. You’ve talked about it already. You’re the one who decided to make a go of it. Get your shit together.”

  I stared at her. I hated it when she was right. She was right now, and she knew that I knew it.

  “If your friendship is that strong, breaking up is going to be awkward for a little bit, but you’ll get through it. Hell, if you fight, he and I can swap places. I’ll come live with you for a few days, and he can live with Sean. God knows I need a break every now and then. I keep suggesting saving up for the Bahamas, but he wants to come with me.” She winked.

  “I’ll come instead. I think a vacation is what I need.”

  “The last time we went on vacation, you took a notebook to the beach.”

  “If inspiration can strike on the toilet, it can strike on the beach.”

  Brie rolled her eyes. “I know. You wrote half a book by hand.”

  I grinned.

  “I’m just saying that everything can be changed. Hell, if you’re really uncomfortable, tell him you’ve changed your mind.”

  “I haven’t changed my mind. I just want us to move at as normal a pace as we can. Most people don’t live together when they start a relationship.”

  “Okay, I get that. That makes more sense than you being freaked out about being in a relationship at all.” She shoved two fries in her mouth and tilted her head as she chewed. “Although,” she said when she’d swallowed them. “I feel like I should be surprised that you’re dating each other, but I’m not. You just kinda…fit together. You’re a lot more uptight than he is, but he’s a hot damn mess for a grown-ass man. You make him a more responsible person, and he encourages you to have more fun. Somehow, you just work.”

  I sighed, trailing my chicken tender through the ketchup on my plate. “First, I resent you saying I’m uptight.”

  “You are uptight.”

  “That doesn’t mean you have to say it.” I sniffed. “But you’re right. We do balance each other out. I always thought that was why our friendship worked as well as it does, but maybe that’s the perfect basis for a real relationship.”

  “Exactly. And think about it like this: you’ve already worked out the kinks in your relationship thanks to the roommate agreement. You both know what pisses the other person off. Like how Jay never wears pants.”

  “Oh.” I held up my chicken. “We changed that yesterday. Instead of the rule being ‘must wear pants,’ it’s now ‘no pants are the best pants.’”

  “And that’s how you ended up having sex twice in two days.”

  “No. I ended up having sex twice in two days because sex with Jay is pretty damn great.”

  “And that’s enough for me,” Dad said, turning on his heel as soon as he arrived at the table.

  My cheeks flamed. Brie laughed so hard she choked on her own spit. That was single-handedly the worst moment of my life. My dad knew we’d been on a date—obviously—but now he knew his daughter had sex on the first date.

  Did that rule count since we lived together?

  I know one date that wouldn’t count—eating dinner at home. We did that, oh, every night?

  I snorted to myself at the thought. Maybe I was taking the whole idea of dating Jay too literally. I was thinking about actually dating. Movies, restaurants, days out, nights out, drinks at a bar…

  That wasn’t really viable for us. Plus, we didn’t need that time to get comfortable around each other. We already were. He’d seen me at my deadline worst with three-day-old sweatpants and hair that hadn’t been washed for five days. I’d seen him with a little too much overgrown stubble and wing sauce on his shirt after a late night watching football.

  Jesus, I was overthinking this.

  This was the problem when you wrote books for a living. Mostly everything had to be thought through, and it wasn’t always a good skill to bring into real life.

  I blew out a long breath and looked at Brie, smiling. “I’m overreacting, aren’t I?”

  She grinned. “Do you need me to answer that?”

  CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO – JAY

  Communication Is Key, Unless You Ate The Oreos

  “So what are you doing?” Sean asked, leaning against the side railing of the pier.

  A gentle breeze whipped around me as I dropped my head back and looked at the darkening sky. “Figuring it all out. It ain’t easy, you know? It’s been four days—four fuckin’ days since we admitted how we feel about each other.”

  “In other words, Shelby’s phoning it in.”

  I looked at him out of the side of my eye. He wasn’t exactly wrong, but it didn’t bother me. I knew Shelby, and the fact that she’d even admitted to my face that she had feelings for me was something.

  It was a fucking breakthrough, that was what it was.

  “She’s dealing with stuff in her own way,” I replied. “It’s not easy for her to talk about emotion. It never has been. I might tease her, but I’m never going to pressure her into doing something she isn’t ready for. If she wants to casually date, fine. She wants to exclusively date, fine. It’s all her prerogative. It doesn’t mean she doesn’t have feelings for me.”

  Sean grunted. “I dunno how you deal with it. Brie’s so open about everything. It’d drive me crazy figuring out what’s going on.”

  “Man, you need to remember they’re different people. Brie is the extrovert to Shelby’s introvert. Brie could spend all night in the middle of a club, dancing with strangers. That would give Shelby an anxiety attack. She’d rather lie in bed with a book.”

  “I get that. It’s why they’ve been stuck to each other like glue since they were fuckin’ eight.” He snorted. “I guess I don’t understand how you can trust how she feels.”

  “She told me.”

  “She told you the feeling was mutual.”

  “Exactly. Do you know how hard that was for her?” I turned and looked at him. “She was terrified to tell me that. We’ve been best friends for twenty years. Shelby isn’t the kind of person to do anything on a whim.”

  “I know. She took me shopping for Brie’s birthday. We went to two towns and thirteen stores.”

  I smirked. If that didn’t sum Shelby up… “She’s flaked on every serious relationship she’s ever come close to having. Nobody has ever understood her. She’s not afraid of commitment, she’s just private. Ironic, really, considering she’s happy to admit that she puts a piece of her soul
into every single book she writes.”

  “We’re different people. Not knowing exactly how she felt… Shit, Jay, even when Brie’s mad at me, I know exactly how she feels.” He gave me an exhausted look. “Her ass makes sure she details every single thing.”

  “You’re talking about a woman who put a roommate agreement in front of me to tell me exactly how she felt. The first thing she did yesterday was outlaw wearing pants in the apartment. That tells me a lot.”

  It was also my new favorite rule, for what it was worth.

  She’d worn a dress this morning.

  If I hadn’t had to go to work, we would have made it three-for-three on the sex timetable before lunch.

  Sean laughed, shoving his hands in his pockets. “Well, if that ain’t love…”

  “You’re a step ahead of us there.” I joined him in laughing. “It’s the little shit like that. She’s hard work, but hell, I’ve put up with it for twenty years already.”

  “I thought you weren’t in love with her.”

  “I’m not. That doesn’t mean I don’t love her, though. I do. I love her and have for years. It’s complicated.”

  “Yeah, because now you live with her, and she’s not just the cute friend you go to for advice.”

  I glanced at him. “She’s the one I go to other people about.”

  “Exactly.” He shrugged. “You make sense to me. Let’s face it: you fuckin’ suck at being an adult. Your grandma washed your clothes until recently. She’s a good influence on you.”

  “She always has been.” I looked out over the pier. At the food stalls, the lights, the tourist-centric rides, and arcades that brought people to our little coastal town.

  What I was saying was true. The crazy, sweet, quiet, sarcastic, kooky woman who was my best friend was a good influence on me.

  We just really needed to figure out what we were to each other.

  I think I already knew what she was to me. It felt so trivial to say that she was my kind of forever because if I was honest, I’d never imagined a future without Shelby in it.

  Maybe that was my first clue.

  Not once had I ever seen a future without her, but I’d never seen one with her on the sidelines, either.

  She’d always been front and central, an integral part of my life.

  Even if she avoided the gym like the plague. The same one I’d own one day.

  I chuckled to myself. Jesus, we were the total opposite of each other. I was fit and liked to work out. She considered a workout writing two thousand words and reaching for the Oreos.

  I could easily run five miles on the treadmill without breaking a sweat. The only place Shelby ran was to the sofa so she didn’t miss the next episode of her latest TV obsession.

  And she could talk about her ‘extra fifteen pounds’ all she liked, but I was obsessed with her the way she was. I didn’t see the hang-ups she apparently had with her body.

  I saw her singing into a fucking mop like she was some nineties heartthrob. I saw her ordering a salad with a pizza because she considered that a balanced meal. I saw her neglecting the things that made her feel good because she had to write right-the-fuck-now. I saw her scribbling into notebooks and sending voice messages and emails to herself because she needed to get the idea down right now.

  Shelby was more than she valued herself at, and I’d die trying to show her that.

  Shit.

  Maybe Sean was right.

  Maybe I was in love with her.

  Or if I wasn’t there, I was well on my way. I already knew I was falling. Like a fucking avalanche.

  It was easier to not put it into words. To say I had feelings for her was so much more manageable than putting a real label on how I felt, especially since I knew she wanted to take it slower.

  She wanted a natural progression of the relationship. That was never going to happen, but that didn’t mean I had to stand under a moonlit sky and profess my undying love.

  Shit. She’d probably kick me in the balls.

  And the very thought of that made me laugh like hell.

  “What’s so funny?” Sean asked, eyeing me with confusion.

  “Me,” I replied, looking in the direction of the entrance to the pier right as two familiar figures appeared.

  Shelby and Brie were walking close together. Brie’s black hair made Shelby’s brown hair look brighter than usual, and as they got closer, I could see that they had their arms linked and their heads close as they talked.

  Something flipped in my stomach.

  Fuck—was I nervous?

  I was.

  This was only our second date if you went on a technicality, and while this was a setup we’d done before, I’d never considered holding her hand or being, well, a couple with her.

  Shit.

  Shelby’s face lit up as she laid eyes on me.

  And just like that, the nerves disappeared.

  This was Shelby. My crazy, passionate, sarcastic, kooky girl. Whether she was my roommate or my best friend or something else, she’d always be that.

  My girl.

  It was a weird realization, but I was oddly comfortable with it. It rolled off the brain, never mind the tongue.

  Brie bounded up to Sean and wrapped her arms around him, kissing him passionately.

  Shelby approached me much more casually. She was almost shy with her cheeks flushed a light pink and her dark brown eyes shining but focused on the planks beneath our feet instead of on me. “Hey,” she said quietly.

  I grinned.

  Grinned. Like. Fuck.

  “Hey,” I said back. “Good dinner?”

  “It was good until my dad heard me say you were good in bed.”

  Excuse me?

  She jerked her head up and clapped her hand over her mouth, her eyes wide. If it were possible, her entire face was redder than just a minute ago.

  I laughed low, taking a step toward her. “Must have been awkward.”

  “Mhmm.” She finally met my eyes. “He couldn’t look at me until I left.”

  “Can’t wait to see him next,” I drawled. “I specifically promised I wouldn’t take advantage of you.”

  “Well, to be fair, I dragged you into my room.” Shelby shrugged. “Although that might not work in your favor, either.”

  “I’ll take it.” I smiled and dipped my head to kiss her. Her lips were soft and tasted like chocolate and coconut, and I knew exactly which dessert she’d picked at the bar. “You had your mom’s cheesecake without me.”

  “She kept you three slices.” Her lips twitched. “Apparently, she wasn’t nearly as bothered about us having sex as my dad was.”

  “That’s because she’s been plotting your wedding since you were sixteen,” Brie quipped, ruining the moment. “Her and Georgina, that is.”

  “What?” I raised my eyebrows.

  “Oh, yeah. They’ve been plotting it for years. It’s why nobody is surprised.” She let go of Sean’s hand and walked over to us. “You’re so close that everyone assumed you had this brother-sister thing going on, right? But your moms thought there was something more, and now I think they were onto something.” She shrugged. “They had a literal bet on you two getting it on. Kinda weird, but—”

  “Get to the point, Brie,” Shelby said, a slight edge to her tone.

  “All right. They figured you were both so protective over the other that nobody would ever pass The Test, as they called it—capital letters and all—so they bet that you’d both get together by the time you were either twenty-five or thirty.” She paused and looked at me. “I think your grams won that one. Shelbs, your mom called thirty, but Georgina thought it’d be twenty-five. Since you’re twenty-six, Jay, Grams just won like eight-hundred bucks.”

  “How do you know that?” Sean asked.

  Brie met his eyes. “Your mom. They’re all in it together.”

  “And you never told me?”

  “Well, no. I was sworn to secrecy when I heard them talking about it.”

 
“You never told me?” Shelby squeaked. “Best friend my ass!”

  “I picked forty!” Brie held her hands out, palms up. “I thought you’d both be forty and divorced before you figured it all out.”

  If Shelby’s gaze was deadly, Brie would be six feet under.

  “It’s so nice to know we have parents who care about our feelings. Friends, too,” I said dryly. “I wish I was surprised.”

  “Same,” Shelby muttered. “No wonder your mom always brought out the baby pictures.”

  “Like you hated that.”

  “Hush.” She spun and pushed a finger against my lips. “I think we can accuse your mom of influencing the vote. Grams, too. She’s always been one for getting out the submarine picture.”

  Sean sniggered at the same time Brie looked away.

  “On another note,” I said brightly. “If anyone had to be right, at least it was Grams. We can guilt her into food forever.”

  Shelby perked up at that. “Oh, she so has to hand over that spaghetti recipe now.”

  • • •

  “You mad?”

  Shelby’s hair whipped around her face until she swept it around the back of her neck. “I want to be. I think I should be. Don’t you?”

  I nodded. “I feel like our parents are shits for betting on something we had no plan of happening. It was never in our plans to feel this way, but we do.”

  “We do.” Her throat bobbed as she agreed. “Do you feel like we’re pressured into making this work now? Because I do. I feel like we have to because of them.”

  I twisted my head until I looked at her. We were both standing halfway down the pier, somewhere between the hook-a-duck stall and the fortune teller, and the wind was just bearable.

  And I could see it. On her face. The worry. The pressure. The expectation.

  I moved closer to her so our elbows touched. “No.”

  “No?” She tilted her head.

  Our eyes met.

  “No,” I repeated. “I don’t care what they think. I think their betting pool is stupid and petty, and I am not surprised Brie threw her own bet in. She thought it’d take us until forty, remember?”