Connor leaned back and began probing his hole with slickened fingers. Zane knew enough to bear down on Connor’s digit when it began breaching him but the burning pain that tore through his body caught him off guard. Connor didn’t miss his discomfort and instantly stopped.
“Breathe through it and relax,” Connor urged as he waited patiently. Zane closed his eyes and focused on Connor’s voice as he offered more words of encouragement. As Connor began to sink farther inside of him, the pain began to fade and all he felt was an overwhelming pressure. He knew Connor was as deep as he could get when he felt Connor’s other fingers resting against his skin. He expected another finger but what he got was Connor pulling out of him before sliding back in. The pain flared back to life but lasted only a few seconds as his insides began to burn in response to the friction Connor’s finger was causing. When Connor’s finger slowed, it was on the tip of Zane’s tongue to beg him not to stop but then suddenly Connor’s finger was pressing against his walls as if searching for something. The realization of what he was looking for registered just seconds before Connor’s fingertip brushed against his prostate and Zane let out a shout at the jolt of electricity that went through him.
“Oh fuck!” Zane cried as Connor did it again and again. It felt so insanely good that Zane was barely aware of a second finger entering him. All he cared about was the way Connor pressed down on his gland and rubbed over it back and forth. Back and forth.
“Connor, it’s so good!”
He wanted to tell Connor he needed to stop because his orgasm was imminent but Connor chose that moment to lean down and suck his dick into his mouth. The combination of being fingered and blown at the same time had Zane begging and pleading with Connor to let him come.
“Soon, baby,” Connor said hoarsely as he released Zane’s dick. The fingers slipped from his body and Zane felt an overwhelming emptiness. So when Connor’s crown began pushing into him. Zane didn’t hesitate to thrust against Connor. Even with Connor taking it slow, the pressure of Connor’s thick shaft splitting him open had Zane sucking in mouthfuls of air. It didn’t hurt exactly – it just felt strange. His muscles began to ache from the strain of trying to accept the ruthless invasion but Connor took notice because he leaned forward and placed his arms under Zane’s legs so that they were dangling over Connor’s elbows. The move allowed Connor to push Zane farther back on himself and put Connor in control of how high and wide his legs were. And as soon as Connor changed the angle of Zane’s body just a little, Connor sank in to the hilt and held there as Zane tried to adjust.
“Look at me,” Connor ordered.
Zane wasn’t even aware he had his eyes shut until Connor told him to open them. When he did, he nearly came at the sight of Connor hovering over him. So in control, so confident. He was completely at Connor’s mercy and Connor knew it. Gone was the vulnerable young man who’d worried about pleasing him or hurting him. The man above him, inside of him, owned him in that moment. He could have told Zane to do anything and Zane would have done it. It was a heady realization…and he fucking loved it.
“You feel that, Zane?” Connor said as he ground his hips against Zane. “Nothing between us anymore…we’re one now.”
He did feel it. Physically they were as close as any two people could be but emotionally they were the same – connected in ways they never would have been able to find on their own or with other people. It was something Zane hadn’t ever even thought to look for in his life because he hadn’t known it existed. But Connor had known and had wanted it badly enough for the both of them.
“I feel it,” Zane managed to say just before Connor began moving. There was no pain or discomfort anymore and Zane didn’t make the mistake of closing his eyes again because he didn’t want to miss any of what Connor was giving him.
Connor’s pace began to increase even as he kept his lunges long and deep. Their bodies were slick with sweat and Zane’s grunts matched each thrust of Connor’s hips until they started coming so close together that Zane was essentially moaning non-stop. Connor released his legs so he could lean over and kiss him and Zane wrapped them around Connor’s lower back. He felt Connor’s arms slide beneath him and then his hands were curling over Zane’s shoulders. The position had their bodies perfectly aligned and every surge of Connor’s hips had his pelvis and abdomen grinding over Zane’s swollen cock.
He loved that Connor never stopped kissing him even as he began to slam into Zane over and over. Deep, drugging kisses with jerky, heavy thrusts – a contradiction that had heat sizzling down Zane’s spine and his balls drawing up tight against his body. His hands were at Connor’s back as they kissed but as his orgasm began to overtake him, Zane lowered his legs enough so that he could slide his hands down Connor’s lean muscles until he was able to curl them around Connor’s ass. As powerful as Connor’s pounding was, Zane couldn’t stop the need to make sure Connor plunged into him as deep as he could possibly go every time he surged forward.
“I love you,” Zane managed to whisper between Connor’s kisses in the seconds before his release hit him and he heard Connor call out his name as Connor humped into him uncontrollably. The feel of Connor’s semen bathing his insides had Zane roaring in satisfaction and he held Connor’s ass so tightly that he knew there would be bruises in the morning. Every time Connor jerked into him, more semen dripped from Zane’s cock and got lost between their bodies. When Connor’s body did finally relax, Zane welcomed the weight even as he maintained his death grip on Connor’s ass to make sure he stayed exactly where he was.
“Not yet, okay?” Zane murmured against Connor’s neck.
Connor seemed to know what he was talking about because he simply said, “Not yet,” and then lowered his mouth to Zane’s.
Chapter 12
“How come Mrs. Finney doesn’t rent out the upper units of the house?” Zane asked as he reached for Connor’s hand as they walked down the steps. He glanced up to make sure Ray was in sight and saw that the big man was standing on the other side of the street next to his car. His eyes were scanning their surroundings for any sight of Lionel Sutter but fortunately the street was quiet.
“She was going to after Mags and Gemma moved out,” Connor replied. “But the contractor she hired fleeced her – took the deposit she’d given him and disappeared…but not until after he gutted the place.”
“Mags and Gemma used to live here?” Zane asked as he glanced up at the two boarded up windows on the top floor of the house.
“Yeah, this is where they met, actually. Gemma was finishing up her residency and Mags had moved in after her husband died. They decided to get a place together last year – one that was closer to the hospital where Gemma works.”
Zane had met Mags’ wife a couple of weeks ago when they’d finally taken Mags up on her dinner invite. Gemma had turned out to be the complete opposite of Mags – petite, sweet, quiet. She’d been incredibly easy to talk to and she doted on Connor the same way Mags did even though they were probably close to the same age. Mags had spent most of the night giving him the silent treatment but all that had changed when Zane had mentioned his paternal grandfather was from Scotland. Mags’ eyes had lit up at that but it wasn’t until Zane had eaten every bit of the Haggis she’d stuck in front of him, that Mags had started asking him pointed questions about his work, his past and most importantly, his intentions towards Connor. Connor had been too busy trying to choke down his own dinner to intervene but Zane had held his own. Enough to get an invitation for dinner the following week.
“So Mrs. Finney can’t afford to fix up the other rooms?” Zane asked.
“No. There wasn’t much insurance money left after she buried her husband ten years ago and I guess she took out a second mortgage on the house to help pay some of the medical bills he left behind. She relies pretty heavily on the rent I pay her.”
Connor didn’t need to say anything else because Zane knew what he wasn’t saying. Although Connor had been living with him for nearly two month
s now, he continued to pay rent on his apartment and since he wasn’t working, Zane knew the money was likely coming from the money Connor had saved up for his prosthesis. There would be a point where the money would eventually run out and it was clear that Connor wouldn’t be the only one who would suffer because of it.
Zane had tried to broach the subject of money with Connor on more than one occasion but it continued to be a sticking point. Connor still hadn’t managed to return to the bar since the attack and he’d been struggling with which path to take. The work from home jobs he’d researched typically required some form of training as well as an initial investment up front with no guarantee of a reasonable return. Connor had access to money for an education through his GI benefits but he would still need to work while he went to school and since he had staunchly refused to even discuss the possibility of Zane supporting him during that timeframe, his options were limited.
“Can we stop by the bar?” Connor asked quietly once they reached Zane’s car. Connor’s pensive expression had Zane figuring that Connor had been thinking the same thing as him.
“Yeah, sure,” Zane said as he leaned down and brushed a kiss over Connor’s lips.
The ride to the bar only took a few minutes and though it was as quiet as always, Connor still hesitated when Zane opened the door. Even with the falling darkness, Zane could see the terror that overcame Connor and he quickly shut the door so at least Connor wouldn’t have to look at the grungy floor where he’d lain in a pool of his own blood.
“I don’t understand why I can’t do this,” Connor ground out in frustration.
“It will take some time,” Zane offered as he hugged Connor. The therapy that Connor had sought out had helped a lot to diminish the nightmares Connor had experienced early on but even when Dr. Barnes had accompanied him to the bar during daytime, Connor couldn’t cross the threshold. His guilt about killing Jason had eased as well as he’d acknowledged that he’d had no choice but knowing Lionel Sutter was still out there was a continued source of stress. There’d been no attempted contact on Lionel’s part and Dom’s surveillance had shown that Lionel’s day to day routine had returned to normal. The threat had diminished enough that the surveillance of Lionel had ended but Zane had been reluctant to remove Connor’s security detail. It was something he could easily afford but he knew eventually Connor would insist that it too come to an end.
“You okay, sweetie?” Mags asked from the doorway behind them.
Zane released Connor enough so he could see Mags and Connor managed a nod. “I think you need to start looking for someone else, Mags,” Connor murmured.
“Nonsense,” Mags said with a huff before she pushed past Zane and gather Connor into her arms. “I’ll buy a new bar before I let you go,” she declared. She gave Connor a smacking kiss that left him with a bright red imprint of a pair of lips on his forehead. Zane was glad when all he got was a pat on the arm as she ambled back into the bar.
Once they got back to Zane’s apartment, Connor headed towards the bedroom. Zane found him sitting on the edge of the bed working to get his prosthesis off. Zane took over the task for him.
“You think what Declan said is true?” Connor asked. “That Dom might give someone like me a job?”
Zane had mentioned his discussion with Declan about Connor’s job troubles at Dom and Logan’s wedding. While Connor hadn’t seemed interested at the time since he was certain he’d be able to return to Mags’ bar, he had been receptive when Declan mentioned it a couple weeks later when they’d gone to Declan, Ren and Jagger’s place for dinner. Declan had taken it upon himself to mention Connor’s concerns to Dom and had told Connor that Dom had no issue with the possibility of Connor having an episode while he was at work.
“I think he would,” Zane said carefully. “Not sure I like you saying ‘someone like you’ though,” he added.
“You know what I mean.”
He did. Although Connor’s confidence about his condition had grown as a result of his sessions with Dr. Barnes, he still wasn’t as certain of others being as accepting as Mags and Jagger had been.
“I’m only going to say this once because I know you don’t like hearing it,” Zane said. “You and I are going to be together for the rest of our lives, no matter what. That means everything I have is yours. Get a job because it’s what you want and get one that you love. And if what you want to do is teach, take the money you earned by serving this country and go learn what you need so you can help others. You’re the strongest man I’ve ever met, Connor Talbot, and you can do anything you put your mind to.”
Connor watched him for a moment and then smiled slightly. “I liked hearing that first part.”
Zane grinned knowingly. “What part is that exactly?”
“The part where we’ll be together for the rest of our lives.”
“Yeah, I kind of like that part too.”
***
“Zane, Roland asked you a question.”
“Sorry, what?” Zane asked idly as he forced his gaze from the window and focused on the greasy looking man sitting across the table from him. Roland Deming was an ugly guy but he’d been lucky enough to be born into a shitload of money so he got to hide his round, pockmarked face, receding hairline and bulging body behind designer clothes and bags of money. They did nothing to hide the glint of evil in his eye though and Zane again wondered what Missy Deming had seen in this man.
“I asked if you had contacted Missy’s mother about testifying. She was quite “receptive” to letting the jury know how much Missy and I loved each other but that Missy was always the kind of woman to take off on a whim.”
Zane studied the man for a moment and then glanced at Ned Morrison who was watching him expectantly. Jim Dupree sat in the third chair in the large conference room. He glanced at Zane with a questioning look but didn’t say anything. Not surprising since Jim wanted what every other lawyer in the firm wanted…what Zane would have in a matter of months. All it would cost him was his soul.
“Tell me Mr. Deming, how much does “receptive” go for these days?” Zane asked coldly.
Roland chuckled and held out his hands as if he had no idea what Zane was talking about.
“Zane, why don’t you explain the strategy you’ll be pursuing.”
“Strategy,” Zane murmured. “Is that what we’re calling it now, Ned?” His eyes shifted back to Roland whose crass smile had faded. “Mr. Deming, I’ll be notifying the judge in the morning that I’m unable to meet my obligations as your attorney and will be asking that he remove me from your case. My suggestion to you is that you not fight my request because the only thing that you will be getting from me at this point is assurance that you get a fair trial. No loopholes, no technicalities, no bullshitting a jury that you’re an innocent victim in all this.”
“You can’t do that!” Roland huffed.
“Zane, outside, now,” Ned snarled as he tried unsuccessfully to surge out of the deep leather chair he was sitting in.
“Sit your fucking ass down,” Zane snapped as he glared at Ned who’d managed to lift his body halfway out of the chair. Ned’s face turned a dark shade of red. Zane turned his attention back to Roland. “Don’t fuck with me, Deming. You won’t want to see what I’m capable of.”
His eyes shifted to Ned. “In case I haven’t made myself crystal clear yet, you fat little prick, I quit.”
***
“You quit?” Connor said in disbelief as Zane carefully began pulling model cars out of his bag.
“Yep. Took my assistant with me – it was all very Jerry McGuire like,” Zane added with a chuckle.
“Was there a fish?”
“What?” Zane asked in confusion.
“Jerry McGuire took the fish too.”
“Damn, that would have been cool,” Zane said. “No, no fish. Just Mary Ellen. Told her she could be my assistant no matter where I end up.”
Zane lined up the three model cars on the bookshelf in the living room. The bright colo
rs stood out against the black and white décor.
“We should bring some of your stuff over here,” Zane mused as he looked around the room. “Make it look homier. Or we could just spend more time at your place.”
Connor bit back a smile. He’d never seen Zane so relaxed and fired up at the same time. “You really did it, didn’t you?” Connor said softly.
Zane crossed over to where he was standing near the couch and kissed him. “I can’t believe it took me so long to see how fucked up I let things get,” he said as he dropped down onto the couch. Connor sat next to him and pressed up against his side.
“I was so focused early on in my career that I would only represent people who I thought were getting a raw deal…”
“Like your dad,” Connor interjected. He could feel Zane’s fingers toying with his hair.
“Yeah, like my dad. But then the money started rolling in along with all the validation from my peers. And it just became more about winning. I put blinders on and steamrolled ahead and when I got the chance to come out here and be a managing partner at an age where most lawyers haven’t even become junior partners, all I saw were dollar signs.”
“Any idea what you’re going to do now?” Connor asked as he dropped his head down to Zane’s chest.
“No idea. Play for the other team, maybe.”
“God, I really hope that isn’t what it sounds like,” Connor joked. Zane snagged his chin and forced his head up and back for a punishing kiss that felt anything but.
“Prosecuting for the Feds,” Zane said, though the kiss he’d laid on Connor seemed to have distracted him from his train of thought. “D.A.’s office might be looking for someone…money would suck but it sure would be nice to put scumbags like Roland Deming behind bars for a change.”
“Proud of you, Zane,” Connor murmured. His eyes fell on the model cars. “Did you build those with your dad?”
Freeing Zane (Barretti Security Series, Book 4) Page 18
