All About You (Love & Hate series #1)

by Joanna Mazurkiewicz

Present

  “Miss Gretel, long time no see. How was your Christmas?”

  I should be happy he’s here. After all, he saved my life so I owe him.

  “Good, quiet. How about yours?”

  “I spent most of the time in the hospital. Mum wasn’t in her best condition,” he says. “Although, all the nurses were dying to ask me out.”

  I shake my head. Russell’s mother has cancer. That’s why he moved to Braxton; he wanted to be closer to her.

  “Do you think she’s going to be okay?”

  “Don’t know. Doctors are promising about her condition.”

  “That’s good to hear,” I say. “Listen, Russell, I want to thank you again. You saved my butt, when I was such a bitch to you.”

  “I couldn’t let you die, Indi. How, otherwise, would you agree to go out with me?” He teases, shoving a large chip into his mouth. I feel the odd shiver that starts dancing over my chest, and when I look up, I spot Oliver a few tables away. Even in the crowd, we are aware of each other, and now his whole attention is focused entirely on me. His girlfriend is sitting by his side, running her hand over his chest. When I meet his piercing gaze, my blood heats up. He just needs to give me a signal that we’re going to be friends again, that he’s really forgiven me. I glance back at Russell, who is watching me.

  “I would love to, but I’m not ready for dating, Russ. No offence, but I can’t be involved with anyone right now.”

  Russell is a decent bloke. We have fun together, but I don’t think he would understand what I had to go through in the past. I should look for support, but I feel like Christian is still around, draining me, pulling me back to the darkness.

  “How can you keep turning me down?” he asks, and when I don’t answer, he carries on talking. “All right, I know I’m full of myself sometimes, but I would never hurt you, if that’s what you’re afraid of.”

  I finish my food and give him a warm smile. People bluntly stare at us, suspecting there is something going on.

  “Thanks. I’ll see you later. I have to go.”

  “Okay, bye, India. Think about our future together,” he teases.

  When I look around, Oliver and Rhian are gone. I sweep my tray off the table and rush to my final class of the day.

  I look at my timetable and check which class is next, but Oliver stands in my way. He got rid of his gorgeous girlfriend quickly enough.

  “Hey, I need to talk to you,” he says, sounding annoyed. My mind goes cloudy and I start to wonder if he’s been waiting for me. Before Christmas, he couldn’t stand to look at me, and now he’s stalking me.

  “Oh, Oliver, hey, what’s up?” I say, but my tone is too high. His eyes linger over my lips for a second too long, and I try to keep it together, like I’m not affected by his stare.

  “Come here for a sec,” he orders, pushing me back to the stairs corridor like he’s afraid other people will spot him talking to me, the loser.

  “What do you want, Oliver? I got somewhere to be,” I reply, irritated. He just keeps ordering me around, like he has a power over me.

  “Just be careful with Evans. He can’t be trusted,” he says with recognizable tension in his voice. My heart skips a beat but then smacks me gently beneath my chest.

  “Why do you suddenly care who I’m talking to? This never bothered you before.”

  His penetrating gaze unfolds the sudden wave of lust. How come he is suddenly so interested in who I’m hanging out with?

  “I’m just giving you friendly advice, India, that’s all. I want to spare you the disappointment later on.”

  “You said we aren’t friends,” I tell him, emphasising the word friend. His expression is unreadable. Then I take a step forward and, without thinking, add, “But we can be friends again, if you want to.”

  There it is. I finally said it. If there is going to be anything between us, being friends is a start. Oliver doesn’t respond. Instead, he continues staring at me with those blue eyes like he’s fighting his answer.

  In the next moment, he turns around and leaves without another glance in my direction. This is the second time he’s done that. I squeeze my hands, standing at the top of the stairs, wondering if I said something I shouldn’t. My heart is still pounding way too fast. His silence only confirms he cares about my choices, but he might not be ready to be friends with me yet. My heart will continue to betray me until he has forgotten about cruel India.

  Present

  “India… Hey, India, over here!”

  I spot Dora waving to me. Weeks have passed since her dramatic breakup with Jacob, and now she’s acting like the separation never took place. I’ve only half an hour before I have to run to the library. As usual, everyone keeps staring, and today, I’m not quite in the mood for Dora’s jokes. I spot her in the back and assess her table. No wonder all of a sudden I manage to bring attention from almost everyone in the canteen. Dora is sitting with Oliver. I wonder what he’s playing at?

  He knows I often sit with Dora.

  I walk towards them, keeping my expression hard. All the eyes in the canteen follow me slowly, and the tension rises. Since our last encounter, Oliver hasn’t really spoken to me and he silently rejected my offer of friendship. I stand by their table, wondering if it’s such a good idea to eat lunch with the man that feels so indifferent about me.

  “Sit down, India. You’re distracting me,” says Oliver, not lifting his eyes from his book. Dora giggles, Jacob gives him a sharp look, and I obey. Every pair of eyes turns towards our table. People expect Oliver to do something cruel, to prank me, but no one apart from the two of us knows about our ceasefire.

  “Right, sorry,” I mutter, blushing like a fourteen-year-old. Dora grins, glancing from me to Oliver, who is still more interested in his book than what is going on around him. I don’t know what to make of him these days. I hate that there’s so much tension between us.

  “We’re actually talking about you, India, aren’t we, bear?” asks Dora, looking at Jacob with a questioning expression on her face. He gives me an apologetic smile.

  “Me? What has lunch to do with me?”

  She giggles. “It’s nothing serious. I was just saying to my boys over here that your birthday is coming up.”

  Crap, I knew Dora would bring this up sooner or later. Her birthdays are a big deal. I tuck into my food, knowing all of a sudden Oliver isn’t looking at the text in the book, but at me.

  “I don’t think I want to celebrate my birthday this year,” I say quickly.

  “Oh, come on. I’m thinking about a small party in our apartment, only a few people. That should do. Oliver, come, will you?”

  I stop eating and glance at Dora with the strongest desire to strangle her right now. She is interfering, doing what she does best. Messing with my life. I glance at Oliver, whose blue eyes are fixated on me, but as usual, his expression is unreadable.

  “Sure, small party sounds good,” he says.

  My mouth hangs open and Dora looks astonished at the fact that he said yes.

  “It’s sorted, then. Don’t worry, Indi. I’ll organise everything.” She beams.

  Oliver doesn’t acknowledge me again for the rest of lunch, but when Dora finally leaves, I decide to take a deep breath and just tell him he doesn’t need to feel obligated to do anything. A group of girls stares at me with such hate, and I know this has something to do with the fact that I’m sitting with Oliver and he’s supposed to throw more pranks at me.

  “Listen, you don’t need to come to this stupid party if you don’t want to. You’ve probably got better things to do.”

  Oliver puts the last piece of meat into his mouth and lifts his eyes to look at me, both amused and curious. Every time he looks at me like that, I feel like he’s seeing more than just my unease. He knows my feelings for him aren’t completely forgotten.

  “Don’t stress, Indi. Maybe you were right. We should put our past behind us and try to be friends again.” <
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  I let go of a short gasp. “Really, I mean after—”

  “If we want to be friends, then we have to remember not to talk about the past. Let’s just start over.”

  “Um, right, if that’s what you want.”

  Then out of the blue, Rhian appears by Oliver, kissing him with such a passion that I’m ready to punch her.

  “Hey, I need to go to the library. Want to join me?” she asks, not even acknowledging that we were having a full-on conversation a moment before she interrupted. She gives me a generous smile, finally noticing I’m sitting opposite him. Oliver agrees and they both leave.

  Rhian actually sounds like a nice girl. She isn’t like Mackenzie. On top of that, she’s stunning, looking more like a model than a biology student. It’s silly that I’m jealous. Oliver deserves to be happy. I hurt him too much and he’ll never look at me that way again.

  As soon as they’re out of the canteen, I clear out and hurry to my class. The rest of the day passes quickly.

  After our small talk in the canteen, Oliver starts to put his decision in motion. He starts hanging out with Jacob and Dora, probably trying to show me that he was perfectly serious with that friendship talk. More often, he is with his new girlfriend, but I can’t seem to figure out his intentions of having her around him all the time. Oliver has a colourful reputation. I’ve been hearing he’s been sleeping around, but since he broke up with Mackenzie, he didn’t go back to his old ways. It appears he is in a serious, committed relationship with Rhian. This doesn’t make any sense, but it’s not my business. We might never be what we used to be, but this is the closest I can get now.

  On the day of my birthday, I don’t feel like getting out of bed. It’s Saturday and Dora has been planning this “small” party for ages now. She invited a few girls from the rowing team. She hasn’t forgotten about Russell, so I need to remember to keep Oliver and him away from each other.

  “Wake up, Sleeping Beauty. You need to be ready in five minutes,” says Dora, barging into my bedroom.

  “What? How come you’re up? It’s not even nine o’clock!”

  “Shut up and get ready. My present is already waiting for you.”

  As it turns out, Dora paid for a spa day for both of us. I don’t know what to expect until she leaves the house and drives at least half an hour outside Braxton. When she parks the car in front of the very expensive hotel, I stop feeling tense. She obviously went to a lot of effort, and she wants to treat both of us today. As Dora planned, all day long we are both spoiled with massages, manicures, and pedicures. After that, we have a break for a delicious lunch.

  My mum calls after we leave the spa centre. I get more birthday wishes and a couple more cards when I get home. Then it’s time to prepare the house for the party. Dora and I both look amazing, and I feel like nothing can go wrong this evening.

  In the past two years, I haven’t been doing much on my birthday. Without feeding the demons, I couldn’t go through with another party, even if Dora insisted. Now is the time to face a new challenge. Oliver will show up and maybe everything will go back to normal, like before we both started hating each other.

  Jacob shows up just after seven with the last decorations.

  “How is the birthday girl?” asks Jacob.

  “Nervous, I guess. I’m not a big fan of the parties organised by Dora.”

  He laughs, knowing exactly what I mean. He takes something out of his pocket and hands it to me.

  “This is just something from me, with thanks, you know, for saving my relationship with Dora,” he says, scratching his head.

  “She is dumb sometimes, but she has a good heart.”

  Inside, there is a beautiful silver necklace. I hug Jacob, telling him he shouldn’t have gotten me anything, and then I head to the bedroom to finish getting ready. When the clock strikes eight, people start coming in. Dora is on her best behaviour, looking stunning wearing a red dress. I curl my hair for a strapless purple dress with black belt. For the first time since I arrived in Braxton, I don’t feel I have to prove anything to anyone. I can finally be myself.

  Before I know it, our small living room is crowded. Russell winks at me, holding a bottle of beer. I chat with a couple of girls from the rowing team. By nine, there is no sign of Oliver, and I begin to wonder if he’s going to show up.

  Dora keeps the drinks coming and stays away from drinking too much, as she is the host.

  I overhear Jacob’s conversation with Dora in the kitchen later that night. They’re talking about Oliver and it looks like he won’t be coming. I force another smile on my face and keep telling myself it’s better not to have too much hope. It will take him more than a few conversations to get over what I did to him.

  Around eleven, everyone sings happy birthday to me as Dora brings out a large chocolate cake. I feel so blessed and swallow my tears, knowing I truly have a good friend in this world. Later on, I put my feet up and tell Dora she can cut the crap and just have a drink. The music isn’t loud, and so far no one has complained.

  A few more people arrive after eleven, and I go downstairs with the rubbish, hoping to get some air. I kept away from heavy spirits tonight, focusing mainly on wine. The darkness covers the campus grounds, and at midnight, my birthday will be officially over.

  I throw the rubbish out and tuck my coat around me. It’s freezing cold again, and getting ill isn’t on the agenda.

  “India…”

  This voice always brings icy chills down my spine. My warm breath dances around my face, catching up with icy air. When I look up, seeing Oliver standing a few feet away from me, my heart reacts instantly.

  “Oliver, what are you doing here?”

  This is the only reasonable question that comes to my mind right now. He shouldn’t be here in the middle of the night. The party is over. He’s four hours late.

  “I’m sorry I’m late, but I wasn’t sure if it was such a good idea for me to come to your birthday party.”

  “It’s freezing out here, Oliver, but if you want to talk, let’s go upstairs,” I tell him, ignoring how I felt when he didn’t show up.

  “I got a present for you. I know it’s midnight, but let me show you something.”

  “Oliver, you don’t have to do this. It’s all right. If you come upstairs, then you can have some leftovers—”

  “India, I don’t want the cake. I want to take you somewhere. Stop dismissing everything I’m saying,” he insists, approaching me. All of a sudden, my body doesn’t want to be away from him.

  “I need to tell Dora. She’ll be worried,” I say, not even realising I’m agreeing to go with him.

  “Text her. Say you’re with me.”

  Chapter Twenty

  Friends?