My Insanity

by Martin Länger

  “Oh, how wonderful, our beloved, our perfect, our generous Lord Pride respects everything that shines with elegance,” the red teardrop spoke.

  “Indeed, he is Lord of grant stature, who doesn't have an equal. A true Lord of transcendence,” the blue one spoke.

  Gwyn was the first that wanted to answer them, but he was being held back by Delirias, while Leandro took a step forward.

  “What do you mean by 'spectacle'?” the man with the dark locks asked.

  The three strange figures winced for a moment and hurriedly formed a little circle, putting their heads together.

  “They are without knowledge, and they still traveled this far? How courageous.”

  “Humans are always so lovely when they wrestle with themselves and suffer.”

  “Well, it was quite obvious that Pride’s masked ball would lead only the most significant individuals to our city.”

  They continued to whisper to each other in excitement until Leandro vocally cleared his throat.

  The masked man with the staff quickly turned himself around to their new arrivals.

  “Ahem, I beg your pardon,” he cleared his throat as well. “It hasn't been that long since we've been tasked with this important assignment of guarding the gates. So, we are still a little flustered.” The other two were leaping up.

  “Adrenaline rushes through our veins.”

  “Pure excitement, what a festivity! So many possibilities, so many outcomes,” they shouted.

  The one with the red teardrop tapped his twinkling staff two times on the ground and continued, as he extended his arm to the side as if he wanted to present the city itself.

  “It's the grand masked ball of Lord Pride. A festival that takes place within the whole city. Everyone is flowing over with excellence and passion – as the common folk would like to explain it.”

  Leandro shook his head at that statement, while Gwyn was mesmerized by their over the top characteristics.

  “The prom goes on for as long as our Lord wishes, which usually has been around for four full nights and days. It gives everyone the chance of a lifetime to spend time with the most elegant of the elegant at this magical place,” he seemed to speed up his words the longer his explanation went on. “Even other great Lords are traveling from their far, far away hometowns, just to be a part of this miracle of entertainment. The finest clothes, the finest Personas, the finest masks, and all of that can only be found here.”

  Gwyn was ready to clap, while Delirias sniggered next to him.

  The others had slightly different reactions, Destare chuntered with Leandro seemingly out of patience “Are you finished?”

  “Can someone ever truly be finished talking about this magnificent town, my dear gentleman? There is so much to discover in life, I don't see how I could ever stop! Don't let it slip through your fingers,” the leader answered, and even though their masked were curved to a smile, all of them had a somewhat sinister presence lurking beneath them.

  “But!” he stopped. “Enough of my words. Please, come in and be a part, and experience the magic for yourself. As long as your bags hold the right amount of pocket change, you will never miss for anything. Exist as excessive as you could possibly do or want to,” he yelled euphorically. “A last piece of well-meant advice for our new found friends,” he bowed to the group as if he wanted to tell them something in secret and held his hand against his mouth.

  “Should there be, let's say, any inconveniences that arise due to your presence, then it shall be the one and only time that we will feel the need to intervene. I hope you understand,” he presented himself and the other two men once more.

  “For as we are the Cerberus Guard that watches over the four gates of the great city of Magnus. Lord Pride gave us this important task, and that's why we won't allow any naughty boys to stir up any trouble.”

  “Alright, alright – we got it,” Leandro turned himself away.

  “Crystal clear,” Gwyn signaled full consent with his fingertips.

  “Wonderful! Then let me wish you, in the name of the Cerberus Guard, a lot of fun and pleasant times. Enjoy your stay in the most beautiful city that anyone could imagine,” all three masked men were shouting in unison, before vanishing almost immediately, as if they never even existed in the first place.

  “Geez, how can they be so insufferable? And here I thought your aspect was singular, Gwyn.”

  “Kikiki, let your aspect leave us alone for a minute, and I will show you how singular I can be. What do you say, Leandro?” Delirias challenged him with a smile.

  Indeed, it seemed strange that Delirias was uncharacteristically quiet during their encounter. Gwyn had wondered as well, yet he could only think about it for a moment, as a whole new giant city was laid out before him. A new world that was ready be explored by him. They had finally arrived.

  “We are not here to bicker, guys,” Gwyn relented eventually. “More importantly, we have to figure out what they meant by saying 'pocket change.' There was no kind of currency in the city of Lust. Do you know something about that, Leandro?”

  The companion shook his head and replied “The only town I have been to was a giant shithole that I never want to visit ever again. I don't think they had a currency or anything. Hell, we only got to know this place existed after we were forced to travel here by another crazy person”

  “Yeah, I remember that you briefly said something about a weird masked man trying to force you to go west, after we left the crypt,” Gwyn said without thinking

  “Maybe he is from around these parts?”

  “I don't think you'd have any luck trying to guess what that maniac was thinking,” Leandro repelled. “But you don't seem so surprised by all of this. Once again, who was it that told you about this place?”

  “Oh, you didn't know? You should've seen him!” Delirias intervened speaking full of pride as if Gwyn was his prized possession.

  “He walked right into the lion's den at Lust’s city, speaking to the Lord himself and DEMANDING answers.”

  “Delirias… that's not how it happened,” Gwyn tried to shove him away as he started to blush a little, but the aspect persevered.

  “This is no time to sell yourself short,” Delirias grinned at Leandro as if he knew something about him as well. “Can you guess what the madman, Gwyn himself, did?” He didn't leave any time for actual answers. “Of course you don't! He fearlessly faced the Lord of Lust himself and made a deal with him. In exchange for valuable information and a possible escape from this world - he offered up his life to become a slave in Lust’s tower, shall he not succeed. Fufuffu, really a stroke of genius, wouldn't you say so as well?” Delirias was bursting with approval, before leaving Gwyn alone once more, having shocked Leandro deeply to his core.

  “I thought you had some sort of plan…” Leandro mumbled.

  “Did you say something, Leandro?” Gwyn asked. “I couldn’t hear you.”

  Destare put his hand on Leandro’s shoulder, as the young man was trembling with rage. “This is not the time, Leandro,” he spoke to him, while he activated the Pansarum for a brief moment.

  “I don't like doing this, but you have to understand something. You are not Gwyn,” his aspect said.

  “HOW CAN HE BE SO RECKLESS?!” Leandro screamed as loud as he could, because he knew no one except his aspect could hear him in the Pansarum.

  “I THOUGHT THAT I FINALLY MET SOMEONE I COULD STAND BESIDE! I'M SO FRICKIN’ MAD! HE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT HIS LIFE AT ALL!”

  “Calm down, Leandro. We don't know what he's been through. Your envy should not tell you how to judge a person,” Destare scolded him. Tears were almost scrolling down the young man's face.

  “E-even though he is a gigantic idiot… even though I hate him for it… Why can't I be like that?!” Leandro sniffed.

  “You will find your own way sooner or later. You have to start to trust in yourself once more.” Almost sad, the knight started to embrace Leandro in his arms

  “No ma
tter how long it takes. Once you've found it, I will be the one to witness your growth and applaud you all the way.”

  “Thanks, Destare. Thanks for putting up with me,” Leandro whispered as the Pansarum slowly dispersed.

  “Is everything alright, Leandro?” Gwyn was worried as he saw his newfound friend drifting away inside his mind.

  “It's fine. Thanks, Gwyn,” Leandro said as he returned in a flash as if nothing happened. To Gwyn, it looked like he was simply thinking to himself for a minute.

  “Of course, if there is anything you want to talk about just say so. I want to be able to get through this with you by my side,” Gwyn answered.

  And just like that, the hatred that Leandro felt mere seconds ago was vanishing, making way for deep regret of judging Gwyn by a single characteristic.

  “I'm sorry lads, but I think we have to go,” Destare intervened, as he pointed forward. “It looks like Delirias has a mind of his own.”

  “What?!” screeched Gwyn, and before he knew it, they already saw Delirias mixing in with the cheerful folks, where he stood out like a black cat in a field of white flowers. The streets were starting to become more and more crowded as the morning sun rose, and even now the citizens of the city were celebrating the masked ball. They were dressed in wonderful clothes which brought the whole gallant atmosphere to life. Fancy fabrics, symbols, and hats were covering their heads, but the most visually striking and unique detail about them were the masks on their faces. Delirias seemed unusually invested and astounded by them, getting as close to the Personas as he could

  “Great,” sighed Gwyn. “Excuse me for a moment.” He slammed his hand into his face out of shame.

  “Boy, am I glad, that you are more reserved and predictable, Destare,” Leandro added as he saw Gwyn chasing after Delirias.

  “You should pay attention. There is a reason why those two are together.”

  “I know,” the young man answered in a melancholic voice. “Ever since we started traveling together I tried to make sense of them, but I just can't. I thought I hated his guts, but the more I talk to him the more I realize that his problems are similar to my own.”

  Destare let go of the chained cultist in his arms for a brief moment, letting him hit the ground.

  Leandro couldn't believe it himself, but suddenly it was more obvious to him than it was ever before. “Wait. Does that mean that I'm reserved and predictable as well?!” it dawned on him.

  “Hoho, at least it seems like you're starting to use your head. Though I think it is not as simple as that,” the knight laughed.

  With continued laughter, he heaved their chained captive back onto his shoulders and started to followed Gwyn and Delirias.

  Meanwhile, Gwyn managed to somewhat bring his aspect back under control. Though the white-haired man still seemed upset by the fact that he wasn't allowed to look at the many different masks any further.

  “Looks like you did quite the number on him,” chortled Destare.

  “We need a place to stay after all until we can figure out what we should do next,” Gwyn explained, as even he reached a level of exhaustion.

  “I agree. We are raising way to much suspicion if we continue to wander this city without integrating ourselves into the festival,” Leandro joined in, as he cautiously looked around.

  It was as if he could feel the atmosphere getting thicker, with the air being sucked out, as more and more Personas were starting to whisper to each other in secret.

  “That douchebag over here sure isn't helping us either,” Leandro followed up while slapping the captive on his back.

  “Their gazes really feel like they are piercing right through us, don't they, hehe,” Gwyn chuckled awkwardly.

  “Just like back at home, huh?” Delirias pricked Gwyn with his elbow.

  “And not a real face in sight, except for some shop owners and merchants.” The man with the black locks sounded troubled.

  “I guess we'll have to do our part as well when the time comes,” Destare added and the group started to follow along the clean, paved streets.

  Together they strolled through the pompous city which got more and more lively as the day was underway. Gwyn's jaw continuously dropped as they went past the extravagant shops with their unique mask designs and romantically engraved buildings.

  “It truly feels like a fairy tale,” Leandro snarkily repeated.

  “You weren't wrong, Delirias,” Gwyn said to his aspect in awe. “This does feel just like back in our world, maybe a bit over the top, yet still familiar,” Delirias simply grinned, while Leandro didn't appreciate his sentiment.

  “We should still make sure whether that means a good thing for us or not,” he answered in a dry way. Yet, even he couldn't hide his dilated pupils at the sight of the itinerant people in disguises. The streets were paved with stone plates which were easy on their feet, while carved with mosaic pictures of noble looking women and men dancing with each other.

  Unlike the city of Lust, Gwyn felt a sense of order and nobility that he hadn't experienced before. The Personas greeted each other in an elegant fashion, and everything was a tad more laid back than the wild parties of Lust. Even the shops and stores were not filled to the brink, but still fashionable and well received. Especially some of the exquisite tailors and mask-selling shops were not missing any customers. They were walking through the colorful alleys as something loud interrupted the festive mood.

  “Stop the thief! He robbed me! Those are my wares,” a voice yelled loudly over the marketplace the group had arrived at. Reflexively the eyes of Gwyn and Leandro reacted, almost as if they were expecting something terrible to happen. They were ready to respond at any moment. With ease, both of them spotted the alleged culprit, as he was the only one running through the crowd with extraordinary tempo and without a costume.

  “Shall we intervene?” asked Gwyn into the round.

  “Fufufu, his fate is already sealed,” Delirias laughed wholeheartedly, and before Gwyn could even turn himself around to question his aspect, he heard how something hit the ground with a dull impact.

  He turned his head back to the events seeing how the thief had been brought to a fall, not too far from the group. Two masked men were with him, one pinning him to the ground, the other standing next to them.

  Their masks were completely different from the other citizens, sharing the same patterns. Their coat was entirely blue, just like their masks, with wide cut holes for their eye sockets and black feathers were coming out of their head like a plumage. Twinkling gold shades were leading down from their eyes to their cheekbones.

  “I HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING!” the guy on the ground argued vehemently.

  “And what is that thing you’re hiding in your coat?” the blue mask holding him down asked.

  He pulled his arm out of his long, blue robe that was embroidered with white fur, and pointed towards the man’s breast pocket.

  “That doesn't concern you.”

  “Do I have to remind you that a criminal offense, especially against an honorable and deferential citizen of Pride’s city, is punishable by death? Even more so when the offender is an outsider.”

  “Of course!” he growled. “Every idiot in this goddamn city knows that. It's one of your precious fuckin' rules after all - I guarantee that you will pay for these false accusations.”

  “Ho? What do you say to that Gnadus? Should we let him explain himself?” the blue mask turned to the other blue figure that was still standing and was met with a nod.

  Meanwhile, a circle of bystanders had gathered around the three, ignoring what they were doing prior. They were encircled by iridescent, multi-colored masks that were glistening in the sunlight looking down on the man.

  “That's right, you guys fucked up! I'm a citizen of this city as well. Your accusations hold no worth.”

  “So, you are one of us after all,” the masked man that was looking down on him stated for all of them to hear.

  “Then I'm sure you don't hold it a
gainst us if we take a note of your name, and also your current worth, right? Of course, that would just be routine, honorable citizen.”

  At once he pulled out some sort of lists from his coat and started to wildly fling through them. The accused bit onto his lip, as he was seemingly sweating from the pressure that was applied to him.

  “Your name and worth, citizen. Please,” he was called upon, while the crowd started to become restless. It almost felt like they were ready to chime in on the pressure.

  “Pah! Some things really don't change. Damned group dynamics,” Leandro turned himself away in disgust.

  A nervous twitch from the accused was enough to escalate the situation while he tried to escape. Before his arms and legs could even properly extend, the blue-robed man appeared behind him and broke his right arm, bringing him down once more. The man with the lists in his hand continued to speak in a calm manner, as the man on the ground withered in pain.

  “Never dare to spread such an ill-mannered lie to hide your meaningless origin ever again. Especially not while pretending to be one of us.”

  Right after he could hear the words from the masked man, his head was pulled up by his hair and rammed into the paved stone way. His blood spread along the riles of the carved stone plates. Under roaring applause the crowd said their goodbye to the masked man while they removed the body, leaving the scene as if nothing of importance mattered.

  “FUCK! WHAT THE?!” Leandro who had turned around just at the wrong moment was boiling.

  Everything had happened so fast that he was scared of how slowly he reacted. Destare took him to his side, shaking his head.

  “This is not our fight, Leandro,” the aspect reminded him.

  Leandro understood, yet the frustration was clearly visible on his face. He turned his head back in shame away from the puddle of blood that was spreading on the ground. Even Gwyn didn't know how to properly react. In his head, the same thoughts of panic and uncertainty arose.