Psyche Moon

by Chrissie Buhr

  “Sure.” He put his hand on the curve of my back, a protective gesture meant for others to see. He didn’t care about comforting me, but the touch helped me ground anyway. “Thanks officer. I’ll take her home now.” We took off at a jog once more, heading away from my home until out of sight of any onlookers from behind us.

  My mind spun, and I felt cold inside and out. As the power dissipated, I felt like I would vomit. Blindly following the Wolf beside me, I jogged, wishing I could run full out for miles to relieve the emotional conflict.

  Within minutes Matthew and I were walking up my front steps. He only had to push it open since the frame was splintered, making my locks completely useless. Silently I crossed the room to Billie and buried my cheek in her fur. She slept, but the physical touch helped to calm me.

  “Well?” Patience was not one of Jason’s strongest traits.

  Matthew replied. “What I saw was encouraging. She hasn’t spoken since we left, though.”

  Jason turned to me and I wouldn’t look at him. Tears stained my cheeks and wetted Billie’s fur. I didn’t want to admit what I’d done. I could feel Jason’s eyes on me, despite blocking his thoughts. I couldn’t help it, emotionally raw and not entirely in control of myself.

  “It’s done. All of it. Everyone involved.” I replied hoarsely. “Just as I saw it in Matthew’s mind.”

  I heard Matthew leave but barely registered it. “I don’t understand you Sadie.” Jason whispered, once again sitting in the chair. “But thank you.” I made no acknowledgement, burying my face further into Billie’s fur. Weeping silently, I fell asleep.

  “How was I supposed to know?” Billie’s voice was soft, but her vehemence woke me. Awake and human, she argued with Jason. Sensing she’d woken me, she ran her fingers through my hair comfortingly. “I’ve never met a Mage before. Only one has crossed into our territory, and that was before I was Beta. You and Richard killed him. I never even smelled him.”

  Jason growled a warning.

  “Alpha, think about it. She’s been here, living in our territory for almost 30 years. None of us knew she was here. Richard and Kathryn met her – we hung out together! Even they thought she was a Sensitive.”

  That clearly struck a nerve in Jason. His face twitched. “Richard should have known. If he didn’t, then I can’t fault you for not knowing.” I didn’t think he liked to be wrong. And I knew he didn’t like having it pointed out.

  “I told you about her on the phone this week, and I was going to introduce you as soon as you got back. I was on my way to see you when she was attacked and called me for help. I hid nothing from you.” Billie stood her ground, and by the thinning of the hostility in the room, I knew he was calming.

  My eyes were open, but I hadn’t moved yet. I wasn’t feigning sleep. I simply liked my cheek resting on Billie’s bare stomach. Her smooth skin and human voice gave me comfort. She lay on the couch nude but unconcerned, one hand smoothing my hair and the other held against her body. Her shoulder was healing, but it still hurt.

  “How’s the new Wolf?” Billie changed the subject.

  “He’s here, staying with John until this mess is cleaned up. After talking to you, I saw the judge. He’s a rural judge, a real good ol’ boy. I thought we were going to bond over beers or target practice.” He smirked. “I gave him my story and he glared, said ‘Don’t lie to me, Alpha. If the kid’s a Wolf, just say so and he’s yours.’ Damn judge knows about us. Knows who I am. I still don’t know how.”

  “He’s home.” Billie replied, relieved. “Sadie.” Billie spoke to me. Lifting my head, I looked into her eyes. Green once again, I compared them to the crystal blue eyes of her wolf. Different color, different shape. But either way they were her eyes, full of life and love. She smiled. “Sadie, I’d like to introduce you to my Alpha and the head of my family. Jason.”

  I couldn’t help my amusement. Relief at seeing her healing shoulder and hearing her human voice made me reckless. Dry humor escaped my lips before I thought better of it. “We met while you were bleeding. He broke my door. The lock you bought me held, though.”

  Jason huffed, torn between amusement and irritation. “Interesting girl you found, Billie.” He responded to his Beta. “Even if she wasn’t a Mage I’d want to throttle her.”

  “Even the three little pigs received a knock first.”

  “I haven’t eaten you … yet.” Jason gave her a bland look.

  “True. And my house is still standing.”

  Billie grinned. “I thought you’d like her.”

  Jason turned serious. “She has teeth, and she saved your life. I owe her. She’s promised to behave, and so long as she does I will allow this relationship. If she threatens the Pack in any way I will deal with her as a Mage. Not as your girlfriend.”

  Billie tensed but didn’t challenge him. “I understand.”

  “Your mind is the only one she may enter. And if I believe she is influencing you at all, I will kill her without hesitating. I would rather lose you to another pack than to a Mage.” His voice softened, but his eyes never left hers. “I would rather kill you myself than see you collared.”

  “It won’t come to that. I trust her. I love her.” Billie pressed her fingertips to the bite mark on her breast. It had nearly faded into smooth skin, a thin red welt remaining. “She bit me over a week ago.” His eyebrows hit the ceiling. “She is my Mate. She will not harm me.”

  I was thoroughly confused. What does that mean? I asked her.

  She smiled at me. “It means everything. I’ll explain when we’re alone.” She growled in the way that always made my thighs warm and my pussy wet.

  Jason rolled his eyes. “Good God, Billie! Can you at least wait until I’m done yelling at you? You know I can’t think straight when a woman’s turned on.”

  “You think very straight when a woman’s turned on.” She replied coolly, touching my neck sensually.

  In a flash I understood and wished I didn’t. “You can smell me?” I exclaimed, flushing brightly.

  I’d meant the question for Jason, but Billie answered instead. “I love the way you smell when I get you going.” Her voice rumbled seductively, but for once it didn’t affect me.

  “Fuck. Every one of your family can smell when I’m hot and bothered for you. I’m always hot and bothered for you. You’re the sexiest goddamn woman I’ve ever met and your family can smell it! This is wrong.”

  Jason was outright laughing by then. It was the first time I’d heard him laugh, and he bellowed. “The fur doesn’t bother you at all, but our nose does. Ha!”

  I glared at him. Other things occurred to me then, too. “Your hearing. When Richard and Kathryn were waiting outside the front door and we were going at it in the kitchen. They could hear us.” Flushing all the way down my neck in embarrassment, I relived those delicious moments but with the realization that we’d been putting on a show.

  Jason continued to laugh, a deep rumble that shook his whole body. As his laughing subsided, he flipped open his phone and hit a number on speed dial. “Hey. Can you fix a door today?” He gave my address. “Check the whole house out and do what you can to make the place secure.” He paused for a response before he thanked the man and closed his phone on his leg. “Time for a real meal.” He rose and headed for the kitchen.

  “Want some help?” I offered courteously, willing to help if he wanted but hoping he’d say no.

  “No. You two stay put.”

  I listened as he helped himself to my kitchen, opening every cupboard and drawer as he searched. Leaning against Billie’s stomach once again, I began to relax. Muscles I hadn’t realized were stiff began to soften. I thought I was going to lose you. I sighed at her.

  Me too. But it’s over now. They can’t hurt you again. And I’ll be good as new in a couple of days. Your bruises will take a little longer. She fingered my eye delicately.

  I’ve barely looked at myself. How bad is it?

  She sighed. “It looks like someone used your face
for a punching bag. But it all looks superficial. How does it feel?”

  “It hurts.” I confessed.

  “We have a medic in the Pack. I’ll ask her to check you out.” She looked for her phone but realized she didn’t have it. “Damn. I left my phone at home.”

  “I don’t think your fur coat comes with pockets, beautiful.” I grinned at her. Without warning, she slipped her hand into my pants pocket and retrieved my phone. I stifled a gasp at her touch, and she grinned. Dialing from memory, she briefed someone named Amy and asked her to come.

  We’re not going to be alone at all today, are we?

  “Not for a while.” She replied aloud. But we could disappear into your room for a bit. She sent an image of a full body massage.

  Without warning, I grew wet at the idea. Then remembered the smelling thing and flushed. Billie smiled knowingly.

  This is going to be a problem for me. I complained again.

  We sat in silence, enjoying the moment. Sounds of food frying and water boiling came from the kitchen, and I wondered who was going to go to the store, because I didn’t want to leave Billie’s side.

  “Want some clothes?” I asked her coyly. “I’m not complaining. Just offering.”

  “Sure.” So I grabbed a pair of sweats from my bedroom along with a shawl that she could use as a shirt. Pulling on the sweats, she then looked at the shawl and nodded. I wrapped it around her torso and secured it at her side – an easy sleeveless shirt.

  Jason cooked a large meal in record time and served it in the living room so Billie didn’t have to move. It looked like a mountain of pasta along with a mish-mash of whatever was left in my refrigerator. “Eat up you two.” He ordered.

  “Smells good.” Billie commented as she dished a plate.

  “Yes it does.” Jason replied with a wink at me. All I could do was glare and wish I didn’t blush so easily. Billie pretended not to notice but sent me a mental picture of her head buried between my legs.

  Choking on my food, I sent back an image of spanking her ass with my hand. I knew my intended warning had backfired when a smile softened her lips.

  Jason’s gaze passed back and forth between us during our exchange. He twitched his nose deliberately.

  Brute. I complained.

  Hetero male. She corrected playfully. A Wolf’s sex drive is a lot higher than a Human’s.

  “That explains a lot.” Billie laughed, and Jason’s eyes narrowed. He apparently didn’t like missing the punch line.

  We ate in silence for a while, enjoying the lack of excitement. Before the meal ended, Richard and Kathryn knocked. Jason invited them in for me. My irritation at losing control over my home was growing, but I was truly glad to see Richard and Kathryn. Kathryn instantly crossed to inspect us both, checking our wounds and clucking in distaste at the damage done to us.

  “She may have been hurt worse, my dear, but I’m afraid it’ll take longer for you to heal. How are you holding up?” It seemed she knew what happened, so I didn’t bother filling her in. I just nodded, not wanting to get into the emotional stuff yet. She squeezed my shoulder, avoiding the bruises on my upper arms.

  “I brought you something. It’s what took us so long.” Richard patted a large duffle bag over his shoulder. “Jason said you were healing, so we stopped on our way back to hunt.”

  Billie sniffed delicately and her eyes brightened. “Pheasant?”

  I must have cringed, because Kathryn sat beside me on the couch and patted my leg. “It’s who we are, dear. I know it can take some getting used to, but it’s who we are.”

  She thought I was disgusted with the bird. Shaking my head, I explained. “The dead animal doesn’t bother me. The smelling thing is creeping me out a bit.”

  Kathryn looked confused, so Billie filled her in with an apologetic glance in my direction. “She just found out we can smell when someone’s turned on.”

  “Ah.” Kathryn’s eyes danced. “You want your privacy back.”

  “A hypocritical Mage.” Jason commented dryly. Richard and Kathryn froze, alarm coming off of them in thick waves. “So you really didn’t know. How is that possible?” Jason challenged.

  Richard turned to me, his normally pleasant face turned into an angry challenge. Rage filled the air, and he shifted into an aggressive posture. I shrank against Billie, hurt that Richard could turn against me so easily. “What are you playing at?” He asked menacingly.

  “I’m not. Richard, I swear. I didn’t know. I never heard of a Mage before last night.”

  “You’re lying. You have to be.” Jason watched the exchange with amused interest. Kathryn just looked shocked. “How did you hide this from us? What did you do to Billie?”

  “She hasn’t done anything to me.” Billie defended calmly. “Well, nothing I haven’t thoroughly enjoyed.” She put an arm around my waist. “She’s telling the truth, Richard. She was adopted.”

  Richard’s stance softened a bit, but his voice grew desperate. “I like you, Sadie. I really do. But how can we trust you? Mages enslave Wolves.”

  My jaw dropped, beginning to understand the depth of their fear. Collared. “Oh my God.” I looked at each Wolf in turn, and lastly I gazed at Billie, horror filling me. These people were more alive and free than anyone I’d ever known. The idea of any one of them caged was bad enough. But I truly could enslave their mind, take away everything that they are, force them to do whatever I wanted.

  Billie saw my horror and nodded. Sadness filled her eyes, and for the first time I didn’t want to touch her mind. I was afraid of what I was capable of. “Billie. I would never do that to you. I couldn’t do that to anyone, let alone you or your Pack.” My voice turned to a whisper. “I’d die first.”

  I’d grown to appreciate being accepted for what I was within Billie’s family, and suddenly they looked at me as if I were a monster. Not Billie. Her eyes filled with sorrow and love. She knew it would be difficult for us, perhaps impossible.

  I’d of course wondered many times what my biological parents were like. I’d fantasized about them, given them stories to explain who I was and why they gave me up. Mind controlling slavers never occurred to me. “My people do this to you?”

  Richard relaxed only a bit as he leaned against the wall, his arms folded across his chest. His voice stayed impassive and his eyes intent as he told me about my people. The tenor of his voice changed as if reading from a book.

  “For centuries Mages have enslaved Wolves for their pleasure or to fulfill their goals. It’s not easy to turn a Wolf against his nature, and by our nature Wolves are free. It takes time, but there are ways of speeding up the process. Sometimes they sneak into a territory, find a Wolf without the Pack around, and plant a suggestion. A small one, not easily noticed. That suggestion is followed by another and another, until the Wolf’s mind becomes susceptible to suggestion. Since we usually know a Mage when we meet him – or her – this is difficult to accomplish without being caught and killed.

  “The other way is to trap the Wolf, cage him, starve him, and torture him until his body can barely heal. His mind becomes open to control more quickly if his body is weak and his spirit is tired. Once enslaved, a Mage has complete control over all of his thoughts and actions. The Wolf can kill his entire Pack and even his own Mate without hesitating. There is no cure. The Wolf is lost forever. Any of us would choose death over enslavement.”

  He paused in memory before he continued his eyes haunted and angry. “I’m the oldest here, and the only one who remembers. I was about Billie’s age when a Mage enslaved our Beta. We had no idea the Mage was in our territory until he started killing us. The Wolf killed his Mate first, tore her throat out and started hunting the rest of us. It took us two days to understand what was happening and another day to kill him. In two days he reduced our pack from thirty-four Wolves to eleven. My Mate died on the first day. Eleven of us fought him, and only eight of us survived the battle. Our Beta was the best warrior I’ve ever encountered, far surpassing either Billie�
��s or Jason’s skill. The Mage chose his slave well. He did not die easily. Our Alpha died minutes after fatally wounding him. Twenty-six pack-mates dead in three days. It nearly destroyed us and it took many years to recover.

  “This is not an isolated event, Sadie. This has happened many times throughout our history. It’s even more common for a Mage to kidnap a Wolf and just disappear. We make great killing machines when our will is taken away. Humans are easier to enslave, and they do that too. But Wolves are a prize and owning our strength gives them power. Mages live for power, thrive on it. They’ll do anything to gain power.”

  Bile rose in my throat, and I thought I would vomit. I knew that could be me. I’d felt the power’s seduction and knew it was part of me. No one spoke, waiting for me to collect myself. They could probably smell the bile, I thought. Finally I swallowed. “I’ve felt that power, and I promised myself a long time ago I’d never use it again. I won’t become that. I swear.”

  Jason spoke. “Wolves can smell a lie, and we know you’re speaking the truth. We know you don’t mean to harm us or control us. But what if you are seduced by the power? You are a Mage.”

  I shook my head, afraid. “Promise me, Jason. Promise me you won’t let that happen. I’d rather die.”

  Billie grasped my hand. Sadie! Don’t!

  Gripping her hand in return, I insisted. What he’s saying is true, love. That could be me. The power makes me feel like a god. Now that I know what I’m capable of, don’t make me live in fear of hurting you.

  Grasping Billie’s hand tighter, I locked eyes with Jason. “Promise me that you will kill me if I become that.”

  He nodded. “Now you understand how much of a risk you are to my Pack. And how much I’m risking just letting you live. Thank you for your offer, but it isn’t necessary. I already told you I’d kill you to protect my Pack.”

  Silence hung in the air, thick and cloying. I could sense Billie’s fear, but I only felt relief.