by Ivy Smoak
Chapter 35
Thursday
“You really don’t need to come with me,” I said as Tanner and I exited the elevator on James’ floor. “It’s kind of a private conversation.”
Tanner slapped me on the back. “There is no privacy between best friends. Besides, it’s on the way home. And I hate sitting in the car.”
Fair enough. I knocked on James’ door.
A second later, Scarlett opened it.
What the actual fuck? “Scarlett we talked about this. You’re not supposed to answer the door alone.”
She blinked up at me. “It was another accident.”
“Scarlett, you’re in big trouble…”
“Nuh uh, Uncle Matt. You’re in big trouble. Mommy said so.”
“Your mom said that?”
Scarlett nodded and then looked over at Tanner. “She talked about you too, Mr. Tanner.”
Tanner smiled. “Am I in trouble too?”
“No. She said you and Uncle Matt were…” Scarlett scrunched her face up as she thought. “I didn’t know the word. And I forgot it.”
“Like you forgot you’re not supposed to answer doors?” I asked.
Scarlett smiled. “Yes?”
Luckily for her, I had her back. She’d be safe now. At least from the Pruitts and Cannavaros. But from random strangers at the door? “Scar,” I said and crouched down to look at her. “How many times are we going to need to have this conversation?”
“Maybe…once more.”
“Stop opening up the door, kiddo.”
“I don’t think you’re allowed to tell me what to do, Uncle Matt. You’re not my daddy.”
“So you want me to tell your dad what you did?”
She stuck her hand out. “Deal.”
I’d taught her about the art of negotiation a few months ago. She didn’t quite get it. But I’m pretty sure she thought the deal was that I wouldn’t tell her dad. Not the deal she’d actually just accidentally made where I would tell him. “And you won’t do it again?”
“Deal.”
I shook her hand.
“Is that present for me?” She gestured to the gift bag I was holding.
“Not today.” I patted her head.
“Who’s it for?”
“Your dad.”
“Oh.” She sighed. “He’s working. I’ll get my mommy.” She ran off. “Mommy! Mommy! Uncle Matt is here!”
“Such a cute kid,” Tanner said. “Pretty terrible at the negotiation table though.”
I laughed. “Yeah, she could use some work in that area. And in the area involving telling the truth. Why does she keep saying she accidentally opened the door? You can’t accidentally do that.”
“Did you accidentally shove your tongue down this horrid woman’s throat?” Penny said as she stormed into the foyer. She lifted up a tabloid with a picture of Poppy and me kissing before hitting me with it. “She’s a Pruitt!”
I grabbed the tabloid out of her hand. “Technically she’s a Cannavaro…”
“Are you kidding me, Matt? You know what that family’s capable of. She just threatened my daughter and you’re making out with her?”
This was a funny misunderstanding. Maybe that’s why I couldn’t seem to wipe the smile off my face. Or maybe it was because I hadn’t stopped smiling since I asked Kennedy out. “I can see how that looks but…”
Tanner started laughing.
“And you,” Penny said turning to him. “Of all people, you should be upset about this too, Tanner.”
“Why me exactly?” Tanner asked. “I’ve never actually met the woman.” He lifted the tabloid from my hand. “She’s rather attractive, albeit apparently insane.”
Penny looked back and forth between us. “I don’t know what the hell is going on. Or why you both look so happy. But Matt, I am so done with whatever mind games you’re playing. Sending me on a wild goose chase trying to set you up with people when the whole time you were…I honestly have no idea what you’re doing. But you can’t come into my house if you’re seeing that woman.”
“Penny,” James said as he joined us in the foyer. “I can handle this.”
“I’m serious, Matt,” Penny said, ignoring James. “She’ll never step foot in here. I don’t trust anyone from that family. And if you do, you’re completely insane.”
“Penny,” James said more sternly.
I’d never heard him talk to Penny like that. His short temper was usually reserved for…well, me. And I understood why what she said upset him. He was worried that I’d be offended that Penny had said that family. Because of Brooklyn. But honestly? I was just happy tonight. And the Pruitts did suck balls.
“Good luck,” Penny said to James. “He’s clearly lost his mind. Poppy Cannavaro. What is it with you men and evil brunettes from crime families?” She left the foyer as quickly as she had come in.
“Still a little touchy about what happened with Isabella, I see?” Tanner said. “It’s best to let things go, I always say.”
“Tanner, if you’ll excuse us, I need to have a word with Matt in private,” James said.
Every word that left his mouth made him look more and more agitated. I’d been on the other side of one of his fists before. And I didn’t feel like icing a black eye tonight. Kennedy would have too many questions about that.
“It’s fine,” I said. “Anything you want to say to me you can say in front of Tanner.”
Tanner nodded.
“Whatever you want,” James said. “Both of you come this way then.” He turned around and started walking toward his study.
Tanner looked at me.
I shrugged and we both followed him.
The lights were off in James’ study, and as soon as we stepped in, the door was slammed and locked behind us. Then the lights turned on.
James, Rob, and Mason were all sitting in a semi-circle staring at me.
“Um, what’s up, guys?” I asked. They were all looking up at me awkwardly. It felt like I’d just walked in on something really weird. “I thought guys’ night was tomorrow?” Actually, this was good. I could apologize to all of them at once. Wonderful.
“For fuck’s sake,” Rob said. “Who invited Tanner to the intervention?”
“Intervention?” I asked. I stared at them staring at me. Oh. I should have expected this. I’d been a fucking mess recently. But not tonight. Not now. So I just did the only thing I could do and laughed.
“Why are you laughing?” Rob asked. “This is serious.”
I tried to wipe the smile off my face to no avail. At least now I knew why James looked so serious. “And what exactly is this intervention for?”
“You being…sad,” Mason said. He was staring at the smile on my face that I couldn’t get rid of.
I shrugged. “Right, that. I’m good. Actually, I’m great. I appreciated you guys worrying about me, but I’m seriously doing a lot better.” I would have told them about Kennedy. But I wanted it to be a surprise when I brought her to guys’ night tomorrow. It was a silly idea for our first date. It would make her smile though. And that’s all I really cared about. She wouldn’t be impressed by a fancy dinner or anything. Kennedy wasn’t like that.
“Are you high or something?” Rob asked.
“Nope. I’ve had a few drinks, but I’m sober enough to know that I feel amazing. I actually came by to apologize to James, but now I can apologize to all of you, so this is perfect. But I wished I knew you were all coming because I only got an apology present for James.” I handed him the gift bag.
James just stared at me.
“What exactly are you apologizing for?” Rob asked.
“Great question. First off, I’m sorry that I made you all lie to your wives about Brooklyn ever existing. I shouldn’t have done that. Real shitty move on my part.”
Mason nodded.
“And for really not letting any of you talk about Brooklyn for all these years. Not talking about something doesn’t make those feelings just go away. I
know she was a friend to all of you too. I wasn’t the only one that lost someone, and it was rather selfish of me to act like I was.”
Rob just stared at me like he still thought I was high.
“And I think I’m most sorry for the fact that I blamed you two for her death.” I pointed at Rob and James. “That was ridiculous. Yes, the last time I saw Brooklyn alive I had a fight with her because of the prank you all pulled. I blamed you two for my last words to her. For making Brooklyn feel like she had no one on her side when she died. I just needed someone else to blame. Because I hate that I did that. I hate what I said to her. I hate that I left her. I promised her I would never walk away from us. I promised her. And I lied. I walked away and left her with Mr. Pruitt. I know it’s not your guys’ fault that she died. Because it’s mine.” It’s my fucking fault.
Mason shook his head. “It’s not your fault.”
“It’s Mr. Pruitt’s,” Rob said.
I nodded, the smile suddenly gone from my face. “But if I’d stayed by her side…”
“Mr. Pruitt still would have found a way to get what he wanted from her,” James said. “You know that. You never could have prevented Brooklyn from hanging out with her dad one-on-one. And I’m sorry that the two of you got in a fight because of what Rob and I did. I truly am. And I’m sorry I wasn’t sober enough to make better choices back then. I’m sorry that you were worried I’d take my own life. I’m sorry I ever made you worry about that.”
Mason and Rob were quiet.
“All of you,” James said. “I’m sorry, guys. I was in a bad place. But I never meant to drag any of you down there with me. I didn’t realize I was doing that.”
I was surprised James brought that up. I was supposed to be apologizing to him for snapping at him the other night. Not the other way around.
I’m sure we’d all been worried about James hurting himself over the years. But I was done holding grudges. “You don’t have to apologize.” I tried to shake away that feeling in my stomach that talking about Brooklyn always stirred up. The guilt that had been eating me away for 16 years. I needed to forgive my friends. But I needed to forgive myself too. If I had any chance of giving Kennedy a life she deserved, I needed to let this go. It was time. Past time, really. Besides, I’d made Mrs. Alcaraz a new promise. And promises to the living were more important than promises to the dead. They had to be. Because I couldn’t keep going like this. I took a deep breath.
“I’m just really fucking sorry, guys,” I said. “For everything. And I don’t want there to be any resentment between us. I don’t want you to walk on eggshells around me or worry about me being okay. Because I am okay. I think I’m more okay right now than I’ve been since Brooklyn died.” I shook my head. “I just want all of us to be happy. You guys are my best friends.”
Tanner cleared his throat.
“All of you,” I said. “Can we just try to…move on from the past?”
“We all made a lot of mistakes,” Rob said. “I’m sorry too.”
“You have nothing to apologize for,” I said.
“Does this mean you’re done with that fake smile bullshit you’ve been doing for the last 16 years?” Mason asked. “Because you may have tricked mom with that, but you look insane when you do that.”
Wow, I’d thought I’d nailed the fake smile thing. “No more fake smiles necessary.”
Mason looked relieved.
“So you guys forgive me?” I asked. This conversation had been easier than I thought it would be.
Mason and Rob both nodded.
“Of course,” Mason said. “We weren’t looking for an apology. We just wanted to make sure you were okay.”
Rob nodded.
But James stared at me. “When you were worried about me, you had my back,” he said. “And I need to return the favor. Because despite everything you just said, I think we’re all still worried about you, Matt.”
“I don’t know,” Rob said. “He looks pretty happy to me.”
“I promise you,” I said. “I’m good. Better than good. I feel fucking fantastic.” For the first time in years I actually meant it. I was in a good place. I’d been lying to myself for years. Trying to put all this blame on myself when it came to Brooklyn. But I couldn’t go back in time. And if I’d learned anything from her, it was to never take any days for granted. She’d instilled that in me. She’d be horrified that I’d been wasting my life away. And it was like seeing Kennedy had jump started something in my heart. I was done being pissed and angry with everyone. I just wanted to be me again.
“Well, that was easy,” Rob said. “We kind of nailed this intervention thing, huh?” He started to stand up.
“Not so fast,” James said. “Matt, how on earth can you stand there and say you’re okay? Is dating Poppy a cry for help or something? I don’t agree with everything Penny said back there, because I know Brooklyn was a Pruitt and she wasn’t like the others. But Poppy? Seriously? She’s awful. She’s just as bad as Isabella. Is this some kind of cry for help?”
“It’s complicated,” I said.
“You know how the Pruitts operate,” James said. “Of all the people in this city, you had to choose her? Didn’t you learn anything from my mistakes? There is no out with those people.”
“We have a deal…”
“Don’t tell me you signed something,” James said.
“No, nothing like that.”
They all just stared at me.
“I think I can help explain,” Tanner said. “Matt and I will let you in on our secret, but you have to promise not to tell anyone. Everyone else in the city needs to believe the tabloids.”
Rob frowned, but all three of them nodded.
“Matt isn’t actually dating Poppy,” Tanner said. “I can’t believe you guys would actually believe that.” He said it like he hadn’t just kissed me earlier to congratulate me on the same thing. Him knowing first was really getting to his head. “Poppy promised not to kidnap Scarlett if Matt pretends to date her. Just until Richard lets her take over the family business. Apparently Matt’s expertise in the realm of finance is of the utmost importance to Richard.”
“You’re going to help them launder money?” Mason asked.
I shook my head. “I’d never do that. I’m just…”
“Keeping Scarlett safe,” James said. He leaned forward in his chair, his elbows balancing on his knees. “I’m not asking you to do that, Matt.”
“You didn’t have to.” I shrugged. “We’re family.”
“Is that why you’re always trying to sleep with Penny?” Rob asked.
Fuck. “About that. James open your present.”
James pulled out the framed picture of me, Mason, Rob, and him from high school. He looked up at me.
“You have the life I wanted,” I said. “The wife. The family. I’ve been jealous of you for years. Penny’s always kind of reminded me of Brooklyn. And yeah, I may have had a little crush on her. Or a big one. Whatever, it doesn’t matter. I don’t want to destroy your life. I know you didn’t destroy mine. And I really want to put this all behind us. I want us to go back to being as happy as we all were in that picture.”
“Thanks,” James said. “That means a lot. Even though I was probably high out of my mind in this picture,” he said with a laugh.
“So not exactly like that picture,” I said.
“And we’re absolutely sure that Matt isn’t high right now?” Rob asked.
I laughed. “I swear I’m not.”
James looked up from the photo. “So…no more flirting with Penny?”
“Yeah. I really am sorry.”
“It’s okay. I’m just glad you’re not actually dating Poppy.”
“Could you imagine?” Mason said. “I feel like we only just got rid of Wizzy.”
We all laughed.
“But you really don’t have to go through with that charade,” James said. “I can figure something out…”
“I know you can. But you don’t ha
ve to,” I said. “That’s the whole point. I’ve got your back, man,”
“This is wonderful,” Tanner said. “Here, Matt, you should celebrate with some green juice.” He handed me a to-go cup filled with Nigel’s secret hangover elixir. “You did have a lot to drink tonight. Just for preventative measures.”
“Where did you even get this?” I asked.
“I slipped out real quick while you guys were talking.”
Had he? Whatever. If he’d made this, it meant Nigel’s skeet wasn’t in it. I’d never drink one of these Nigel made ever again. I took a huge sip.
“What’s up, Mason?” Rob asked. “You look…weird.”
Mason laughed. “Nothing. I just…never really thought about how much Penny reminds me of Brooklyn. In just like…the way she always has all our backs. And her sense of humor. And a little how she looks too.”
We were all quiet.
“Well, James did propose to Brooklyn all those years ago…” Rob said.
James laughed. “Don’t bring that up. Not one of my finest friendship moments. And just for the record, you both married girls from Delaware too.”
“Huh,” Rob said. “I never really thought about it like that either.”
“It’s fine,” I said. “Really.” And for the first time, I really meant it. It may have been a good idea to mention the fact that I was dating Kennedy. But I was planning on surprising them tomorrow night. By bringing her to our guys’ night. She was going to have so much fun catching up with everyone.
“So we can tell everyone now?” Rob asked. “About Brooklyn?”
“Just let me tell Penny,” I said. “I owe her an apology too for lying about wanting to be set up. For lying about everything really.”
“Maybe give her a little while to cool down?” James said. “She’s pretty heated.”
I nodded. Penny definitely did seem mad at me. I’d fix that next.
“This was highly productive,” Tanner said. “And I think we’re all even now. My job here is done.” He looked down.
I followed his gaze. “What the fuck?” My pants were tenting. I didn’t even feel a little aroused. What the hell was my dick doing? Shit.
