You're To Blame: A High School Bully Romance (Haven Saints High)

by Brooke Jordan

  “Hey, this is between us.” He framed my face. “These cuts are on your body because of me.”

  A single tear slid down my cheek. I couldn’t believe he took some of the blame for the first time. If it weren’t for my cuts not sure he would have any other way. I knew it wasn’t enough. He needed to admit I wasn’t the blame for anything that happened on that rainy-day years ago. Another day. Not today. Tonight, I needed to be pleased. He owed me that. I kissed his palm then weaseled my way back to his tanned chest, strolling my tongue across every fucking ripple. Tate squeezed his hand between us unfastening my jean shorts. He slipped my shorts and panties over my ass. I hovered over him biting his neck. I wiggled out of my shorts and panties.

  “I watched you come so many times in my dreams. Soon you’ll cream all over my dick. I’ll settle for you creaming in my mouth.”

  I clenched my lower lips. His fingers slid into my slickness.

  “I love how wet you get for me,” he murmured.

  My fingers worked quick, shimmying his jeans under his ass and down his thighs. His sneakers thudded the floor and his heavy belt buckle followed. I tugged his bottom lip with my teeth. His finger slipped into my tight hole. “Tate,” I breathed against his lips.

  “Damn, look at that beautiful face.” His blue eyes marveled my features.

  He flipped me on my back. I reached between us into his gray boxers and gripped his impressive cock.

  “You’re so big.”

  “Don’t worry when it’s time you’ll be able to take every…” He tugged my nipple into his mouth. “Inch.”

  Tate palmed my other breast. He slid his tongue along my fluttering belly into my heat. My back arched off the bed and my lips trembled as he sucked my clit.

  “I knew you’d taste like sweet cream,” he groaned.

  “You’re the only girl I’ve ever tasted.”

  “Tate, you don’t have to say that.”

  He peeked up at me. “When have you ever known me to lie to you?”

  My fingers gripped his hair tighter as his tongue circled me again. “Oh, fuck, I’m coming,” I yelled.

  “Yeah, give me every drop, Chelse.” My body convulsed. It felt like electric currents struck every inch of my body.

  “Fucking delicious,” he moaned. Tate slipped two fingers inside me.

  “I told you I knew you were a virgin,” he said hovering over my lips.

  My lips pressed against his. “You only know that because you secretly tormented any guy who tried to date me.”

  “You’re mine, baby.”

  I wanted so much to believe him. My fingers slid up and down his cock as my tongue slipped past his lips. Live in the moment, Chelsea. You may never get this time with him again.

  I widened my legs. “Make love to me, Tate.”

  His tongue twisted with mine. Tate didn’t respond. I stroked faster. His eyelids hooded as he froze. “Shit, Chelsea.” His beautiful blue eyes slowly opened. They were the deepest blue I’d ever seen them. My thumb swept across the tip. Come squirted all over my tummy. I slipped my finger between my lips tasting his come.

  “Chelse, why did you have to do the sexiest thing I’d ever seen?”

  I pulled my lower lip into my mouth.

  “Shit, Chelse I am trying hard to maintain restraint with you. You’re making it impossible. Tell your parents you’re staying at Megan’s tonight. I want to hold you all night.”

  His thumb brushed my hair off my cheek. Tate bit my neck, lying flush against me. I hooked my arms under his shoulders.

  “Right back, I’ll clean you up.”

  I sent my mom a picture of me and my friends I snapped of us at the game.

  Me- Mom, Megan asked me and Connie to sleep over tonight. Can I please?

  Mom- Yes, Chelsea. Don’t make this a habit.

  Me- Love you mom. See you after your shift tomorrow afternoon.

  Mom- Goodnight.

  I sat my cell on the nightstand.

  After Tate cleaned me up, he pulled the comforter over us and wrapped his arm around me.

  “When did you know I liked you?”

  I peeked up at him. “Let’s see. I was the only girl you tortured in kindergarten. It was so horrible, Tate. You ruined so many of my favorite outfits with the stunts you pulled.”

  He threw his head back in laughter. “Yeah, I had it bad. I thought maybe I’d grow out of liking you the way I did. Never happened.” Tate bit his lower lip.

  Fucking sexy. I traced my finger over his pointy nose. “I wish I could stare at you all night, but I am exhausted.”

  “Haven’t slept, huh?”

  I slammed my fist into his stomach. “No, I haven’t.”

  “See if you wouldn’t have spread that rumor about me having crabs to the world you could have slept like a princess. But not Chelsea. You just had to get me back for looking out for you.”

  “Tate, don’t. You knew you were a trigger. You sat that skank on your lap, then sent Stephen to tell me not to do anything rash.”

  He wrapped me in his arms and smothered me with kisses. “It was a bad move, babe. Sorry.”

  I had it so bad for him. Could he see it in my eyes? Of course, he could. He knew me better than anyone. Shit.

  “Do you plan to head back to the party?”

  “No, I party all the time. The last couple of weeks have been the most time we’ve spent together in a long time.”

  Tate scooted lower. I nuzzled his neck and dozed off.

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  Megan was cool enough to drive me home the next day. I couldn’t allow Tate to drop me off. Didn’t want to put any ideas in mom and dad’s head.

  I awoke around ten in the morning. Tate was between my legs. Nothing like another earth-shattering orgasm to keep a smile on my face. The second I stepped into my bedroom I flopped on my bed face down and fell asleep. Rest was what I needed. I woke up long enough Saturday to shower and eat dinner.

  Sunday morning, my buzzing cell woke me.

  Matt- Hey call me.

  Connie- If you want to talk, I’m here.

  Rocco- What’s the plan?

  Megan- How could Tate spread such a rumor. That’s such a low blow. If he pretended to like you that’s not cool. Call if you want to talk.

  Bile rose in my throat. My shaky fingers scrolled through social media. I clicked on Tate’s account.

  REVENGE SEX IS THE SWEETEST. ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU TAKE HER VIRGINITY.

  #Gocougars #revengesex

  Someone snapped a picture of Tate and me on the sofa at Stephens. He flashed a wicked smile for the camera while my head was tucked against his face. Tears spilled down my cheeks as the cell released from my open hand. I clenched my eyes shut as I remembered basically admitting I spread the rumor about the crabs. Fuck, he was so convincing. And I was a fool. Move forward Chelsea. You said it was too good to be true. Be strong this time. My eyes darted to the floor board where I kept my razors. I couldn’t swallow pass the lump in my throat.

  No need to call him. He would probably. No, he’d certainty laugh in my face. I could hear it now. “I was convincing, wasn’t I?”

  I locked my door then strolled over to the floor. My fingers itched and burned. The urge to hold a razor and press it against my skin swept over me.

  I love you Chelsea. You’re mine. All his sweet nothings clouded my thoughts. I need you guys to watch my woman. Those words he stated to all his buddies in the locker room felt so real. I tugged at the floor board and squeezed two fingers inside and gripped the razors hidden in a small piece of paper.

  “Fuck,” I yelled in a whisper.

  “I messed up. It’s my fault.” I couldn’t get him to admit I wasn’t to blame again. Holding my knees, I curled into myself, staring at the window seat where Tate often sat. My cell rang in the distance. Whoever was calling hung up and called back repeatedly. The doorbell rang. My stomach plummeted. Who could it be? Tate would never apologize. Maybe it was Rocco.

  “Matt, slow do
wn. What’s the matter?” I heard my dad’s deep voice at the bottom of the stairs.

  “I need to see Chelsea. It’s important. Chelsea!” he called out.

  My emotions had made me numb. I felt a hollowness in my chest. I couldn’t lift my hand to place the razor against my skin. This had happened before after the shock had worn off, I’d be able to carry through. Fuck him. I won’t inflict harm on myself this time. I’d ask my parents to make an appointment for me to meet with a new therapist.

  “Matt, wait here.”

  It sounded like a herd of elephants took the stairs.

  Dad’s knuckles rattled against the heavy wooden door. “Chelsea, you have company. Chelsea, are you in there?”

  Slamming of fists shook the door. “Chelsea, it’s Matt. Can you come to the door please?”

  I heard the door knob rattle.

  “Oh, no she locked it. Chelsea, honey open the door. You know the door is never to be locked.”

  My eyes fluttered closed. The pain rocked my body like those rickety rides we rode when we were kids. That was one of my favorite memories. I tore it down in my memory. I no longer wanted to remember that day. Tate Forrester was dead to me. The door flew open and slammed against the wall.

  “Chelsea, Chelsea!” Dad pulled me into his arms.

  He tapped my cheek. “Did you take something?”

  “Matt, what the fuck is going on? What would send her over the edge again?”

  Dad carried me across the room and laid me on my bed under the blanket.

  “Sir, you’ll have to ask Chelsea.”

  Matt crouched on the side of the bed. “Have you talked to him?”

  I shook my head.

  “Mr. Culver, if you allow me to stay with her, she might talk to me.”

  He sighed. “Fine. I need to call my wife.” He kissed my forehead. “I’ll be back, sweetheart.”

  Matt grabbed the chair from my desk and sat bedside.

  “What happened?”

  “I need water.”

  Matt ran into the bathroom, returned, and placed the glass to my lips. The cool water slid down my scratchy throat. He dabbed Kleenex against my cheeks.

  “Talk to me.”

  “I know it appeared I was going to harm myself, but I decided against it. Doesn’t mean what he did doesn’t hurt. Everything was fine. So, I thought. You saw him last night. He was the old Tate before Mason passed away. Happy.”

  “Yeah, he was in rare form.”

  “I thought he was genuinely sincere. When we're alone he told me, he loved me. That was the second time he’s said those words in a few weeks. Then.” I paused. “I told him I was tired. He joked. Said if I hadn’t spread the rumor about him maybe I wouldn’t be so exhausted. But he didn’t say it in a nasty way.” My body shivered at the thought of how he pleased me.

  Matt tugged at his golden tousled hair. “If I weren’t online posting pics from last night, I probably wouldn’t have seen his post until tomorrow.”

  I forced a smile. “Matt, go home. I’ll be fine. My dad will camp out in here tonight.”

  “No. Go home, Tate!” Dad roared downstairs.

  “I’m not sure what’s going on, but I have a feeling it has to do with you. And I am fucking tired of your shit. We can’t keep putting her through this trauma. She harms herself because you blamed her for your brother’s death. Do you get that? Can you fathom what I am saying to you?” Dad shouted.

  “I need to see her.”

  Heavy foot steps took the stairs again. My eyes squeezed shut.

  “I’ll get rid of him, Chelse,” Matt said.

  “Chelsea, talk to me. I didn’t create that post. I hadn’t been online until Stephen called. Baby, please look at me. I need you to believe me.”

  “Were you two dating?”

  “Yes, Mr. Culver. I wouldn’t hurt her this time.”

  “This time. Do you even know how that sounds? Go home, Tate.”

  “No.”

  I heard scuffling at my back. Tate’s handsome face came into view. The tears streaked my cheeks again.

  “I told you I loved you last night. I feel the same way today. Nothing has changed.”

  I sat up clutching my head. “Everything has changed. We discussed the rumor. You pretended to be all right with what I’d done. Now you told the world you took my virginity.”

  Dad grabbed Tate up by the front of his shirt. “That’s it. I am talking to your father. Don’t ever show your face at my house again.”

  “Tate, she was ready to slit her wrist again. We found her holding a razor,” Matt said.

  “Damn it, I didn’t do this. I will find out who did. Mark my word, baby.”

  “I’ll call you later, Chelse,” Matt said locking Tate in a head lock, escorting him out of the door.

  The second my eyes closed I saw Tate’s smug face. “You didn’t really think we could be together, did you? You’re the reason my brother is dead.”

  I blinked a couple of times as I woke from the nightmare. My new reality. My heart thudded my chest. Everyone witnessed him fake he cared about me. Chelsea remember you knew it would all fall apart the next day. I just hated how convincing he was Friday night. I was a fool to think he genuinely cared.

  ∞

  Running at top speed around the track brought solace. I left the house at seven in the morning. Mom and Dad said I could miss school. I told them I needed to attempt to make it through the day. The warm breeze swept against my skin as I circled the track. My feet pounded the track until my lungs burned. After my shower I slipped back into my uniform, exhaled and stepped into the bustling hall. The whispering and pointing begin instantly. Someone’s arm slipped around my neck. “Good morning, Doll.”

  “You don’t have to worry about Tate.”

  The sound of his name sent pulsating vibrations through my body.

  “I’ll keep him away from you.”

  I gripped my backpack straps tighter. How would I make it through the day? The backs of my eyes burned as I fought back the tears. I nodded. That was all I could muster.

  “Thanks Matt.” I halted outside first period.

  “No problem. You don’t need books from your locker?”

  “Not right now. I’ll be fine. See you later.”

  He stood staring a minute longer. “My class is up the hall. I’ll be here before yours is over.”

  I placed my hand on his arm. “You’re a wonderful friend. I’ll manage today.”

  He held my gaze walking backwards. “Just know that busted lip Tate’s sporting is all for you Doll.” He pointed. “I’ll check on you throughout the day.”

  The corner of my lip perked up as I darted into class. I’d bury myself in school today. I sat at my desk, fanning my hair around my face and shoulders, shielding my face. The whispers continued around me. The asshole comments were brutal. My throat burned and my bottom lip trembled. Don’t break in front of them, Chelsea.

  “Did she really think he wanted to be with her?” Natasha whispered.

  Jamie snorted. “Right, why did she think he’d forgive a murderer?”

  The gossip queens of Haven Saints High Natasha Edmunds and Jaime Dobbs had diarrhea of the mouth.

  “He had me fooled Friday. First, she’s an outcast then he chose her to be his girlfriend. Tate Forrester doesn’t even do girlfriends,” Natasha snickered.

  Those catty bitches behind me were really trying to get a rise out of me.

  “Yeah, I knew it wasn’t real. Too bad she didn’t,” Jaime said popping her gum.

  “Damn, he really stuck it to her. She’s the laughing stock of Haven Saints high.”

  Mr. Barrings halted mid stroke on the chalkboard and peeked over his shoulder. “Jaime and Natasha, is there something far more important than my lecture? It appears you cannot keep your mouths’ shut?”

  I glanced over my shoulder and flashed a grin. “Bitches,” I whispered.

  Their jaws dropped. That felt good.

  The day dragged on. I ha
dn’t bumped into Tate by third period. My stomach was in knots. I still had to make it through lunch. Hiding in the library wasn’t an option today he knew that was my special place. The wheels turned in my head. Tate admitted he called the Nurse. Shit, I was an outcast because of him. If he posted that horrible post wouldn’t he take responsibility for it? Hm, maybe not. He didn’t take responsibility for Mason. The snickering ceased when I walked into chemistry class. A white sheet of paper was on my desk. Probably a graded assignment from Ms. Summers. I sat down and flipped over the paper. My eyes bulged. Someone printed Tate’s post. The comments were listed below the picture.

  BigDog1- Bro, now that you’ve had that how about sharing.

  Tate- you can have her. She was trash.

  Laughter filled the room.

  My heart sank, and I gripped my arm and squeezed. I scrolled through my phone and clicked on his account. What else did Mr. Football say? The account was closed. My forehead creased. Maybe he couldn’t handle all the attention the post was receiving.

  Not sure why I bothered walking through the lunch line and selecting a meal. I didn’t have an appetite.

  “Hey, Chelsea.” I peeked behind me.

  “Rocco, hey. Where’s your tray?”

  “At the table. I came to carry yours for you.”

  I smiled. “Thank you.”

  Laughing heightened as I passed each table in route to ours. Matt took our friendship to a new level. He was sitting at our table next to Megan. He gave up the cool kids table for me. I glimpsed to my right. Tate’s sad eyes met mine. My heart was in my throat. His disheveled hair didn’t match the prim and proper uniform. The usual jocks sat at his table engrossed in their own conversations. It was almost like Tate isolated himself. Sure, his friends sat at the same table he did, but there wasn’t anyone surrounding him. For the first time a girl didn’t occupy his lap. I’d never seen him sit by himself.

  “Aren’t you a sight for sore eyes,” Brittany spewed, blocking my path. “Can’t believe you showed your face today. I knew you’d be crying your eyes out over Tate.”