Her Scream in the Silence

by Denise Grover Swank

  Horror filled her eyes, and she turned to me, grabbing my arm in desperation. “Please don’t tell anyone. Momma says I have to keep it a secret.”

  “I won’t tell anyone,” I assured her. “But why won’t you tell Ruth and Max? I’m sure they’d help you.”

  She shook her head. “Momma says not to trust them. Not to trust anyone until she gets home.”

  Did her mother know much about them? If she’d gone to prison soon after the incident, Max and Ruth would have been in their teens. Maybe she’d just told Lula not to trust people in general. “They’re gonna find out once you start showing,” I said, then realized this was why she’d worn a baggy shirt. “How far along are you?”

  “I dunno,” she admitted. “Momma thinks the baby’s comin’ February or March.”

  A quick calculation put her at five or six months pregnant. “Have you been to a doctor, Lula?”

  She shook her head.

  “Lula, honey, you have to go get checked out. You need to make sure your baby is safe and healthy.”

  “Momma said she’ll be home before I have the baby and she’ll help me. Just like the midwife helped her have me.”

  I had no intention of letting her go her entire pregnancy without visiting a doctor, but I’d press the issue later.

  “Who took care of you after your momma was arrested?”

  “I lived with my aunt—my momma’s sister—but she died when I was sixteen. My daddy’s family didn’t want to have anything to do with me. So then it was just me, and I moved back out to the shack.”

  “Do you live alone?”

  She turned to me with suspicious eyes. “Yeah. But I’ve got a shotgun that belonged to my daddy. My aunt took it and anything of worth after Momma was arrested. Good thing too, since people took a bunch of our stuff.”

  Had people scavenged her house? I decided to try approaching the topic I was really interested in, especially now that I knew her news. “Why was Bingham watching you all night?”

  She sat perfectly still.

  “Look,” I said. “I know Todd Bingham scares half the town, but he doesn’t scare me.”

  “He should,” she said, barely above a whisper. “He kills people. Or makes them disappear. Same difference.”

  I knew that to be true from firsthand experience. “I know, but Bingham’s a bully. And the best way to deal with a bully is to stand up to them.”

  “Is that what you were doin’ tonight?” she asked.

  “That’s exactly what I was doin’,” I said. “Until Max went and screwed it all up.”

  “He was just lookin’ out for you,” she said. “He likes you.”

  “He likes all of us,” I said. “And he wants us to be safe, which is why he jumped in, even though I had it covered.”

  “Are you really datin’ Wyatt Drummond?” she asked, changing topics, although I was pretty sure it wasn’t intentional.

  “Yeah,” I said reluctantly. I had a lot to consider regarding my relationship with Wyatt.

  “Do you know he hasn’t had a single girlfriend since he came back from prison?”

  “So I’ve heard.”

  “I’d never seen him in the bar before,” she mused. “Everybody says he and Max are fightin’, and I ain’t never seen ’em together, so it must be true.”

  “Do you know what they’re fighting about?” I asked, feeling horrible for pumping her for information. She was so naive, it felt plain wrong. It was an indication of how desperate I’d become.

  “Something to do with their daddy is all I ever heard.” She pointed to a county road coming up. “Turn left up here.”

  I slowed down to make the turn. The snow had started sticking to the road, and I had no intention of crashing into a tree.

  Once I’d safely made the turn, she said, “Go about two miles and then turn left again. I’ll tell you when we’re close.”

  “Okay.”

  “Is Wyatt a good kisser?” she asked, and I damn near ran off the road.

  “What?”

  “He’s got really great lips…not too thin and not too full. I’d never seen him up close until tonight. He’s good at just about everything he does, so it stands to reason that he’s a good kisser. So is he?”

  “Yeah,” I conceded. “He’s a great kisser.”

  “And how is he in bed?”

  I was grateful it was dark enough to hide the blush that was burning my cheeks. “Lula! I’m not gonna answer that.”

  “Oh, come on,” she teased. “I’m not as innocent as I look.”

  “I would guess not considering you’re having a baby, but I’m still not going to tell you. Some things are private.” And then there was the fact I hadn’t slept with Wyatt yet. The next time I slept with a man, I needed to be sure I could trust him with my heart and my life, and while he’d proven the latter, he had yet to prove the former. “Time to change the topic.”

  She laughed. “How’d you end up in Drum, anyway?”

  “My car broke down and Wyatt towed it into town. I started working at the tavern because you were gone and I was flat broke. Figured I could make enough money to pay for the repairs, but it ended up being too expensive. I ended up staying because I had nowhere else to go.”

  “That explains how you hooked up with Wyatt. Half the girls in this town would like to start something with him. Maybe he was lookin’ for something different.”

  If she knew about his recent romantic relationships—or apparent lack thereof—maybe she knew about past ones too. “I heard he dated Ruth years ago.”

  “Really?” she said, sounding excited. “I had no idea.”

  “Do you know anything about anyone else he dated?”

  “Shouldn’t you be askin’ Wyatt these questions?”

  Her question stoked my anger—but not at her. And not just at Wyatt either. I should never have opened myself up to someone who refused to do the same. He’d had plenty of opportunities to let me in. For him to keep such much information secret was unconscionable, especially given the fact that I’d told him about all of the men who’d used me in the past, Jake first and foremost among them. He had to know how much it would hurt me. Why had I tolerated that?

  When it came to Wyatt, I couldn’t trust myself—which meant I’d do best to remove myself from the situation. “You’re right, Lula. He should be the one to tell me. You’ve helped me make a huge decision. Thank you.”

  “I did?” she burst out in shock. “Wow.”

  “Now, about Bingham,” I said, realizing I was running short on time. “Why was he watching you like he was?”

  Her voice shook. “He thinks I know something.”

  “He thought I knew something too,” I said. “And he tried to bully and intimidate me, but I stood up to him. And you can too.”

  “No. We need to let it go.”

  “Maybe we should go to Max with this. He can help you. He helped me.”

  “No!” she shouted in panic. “You can’t tell Max.”

  “Why can’t we tell Max about Bingham?” I paused, then asked what I’d been wondering since I learned she was expecting. “Is Bingham your baby’s father?”

  “I’m not talkin’ about this,” Lula said. “Please, please, please don’t tell Max!”

  The worry in her tone caught me off guard. Was she afraid of Max? “I won’t. I promise.”

  “Thank you,” she said, collapsing into the seat. “Thank you.”

  We were quiet for a moment. Then she pointed to a turnoff up ahead. “Turn there.”

  I turned left onto a snow-covered one-car lane that snaked through a narrow gap in the trees.

  “I can get out and walk from here,” she said. “I’m scared you’re gonna get stuck.”

  “I don’t feel right leaving you here, Lula. You haven’t been home for a month. At least let me walk with you to make sure everything at your house is okay.” Especially after what she’d said about scavengers.

  She shook her head. “Nah, I’ll be fine. I was g
onna walk home anyway, remember?”

  She went to open the door, and I asked, “Are you taking prenatal vitamins?”

  “What?”

  “I’m going to Greeneville tomorrow. I can pick some up for you, if you like.”

  Her mouth dropped open. “You would do that for me?”

  “I suspect they might not carry them at the Dollar General. This way you’ll be set. And I won’t give them to you in front of Max or Ruth, so no need to worry, okay?”

  Tears filled her eyes. “Thank you, Carly.”

  I thought about her being out here all alone. I suspected Todd Bingham knew where she lived, regardless of whether they’d had an affair. “Hey,” I said as an idea popped into my head. “How about you grab some stuff and I’ll take you home with me.”

  “Why?”

  “I’m worried about you being here all alone. You could stay with me and Hank tonight, and we’ll figure out what to do tomorrow.”

  Her eyes grew wide. “You’re living with Hank Chalmers?”

  “Yeah,” I said, confused at her reaction. “Is that a problem?”

  “I’m fine,” she said, but she opened the door as though her pants were on fire. “Thanks for the ride.”

  She was already out the door when I called after her. “Lula! Wait!”

  She paused with her hand on the edge of the door, ready to close it. Her eyes were wide with fear.

  “Lula, are you afraid of Hank?”

  She shook her head vigorously. “No. I’m fine. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  “Lula! Wait!” She hesitated again, and I said, “I’d like to be your friend. I want to earn your trust. If you’re scared of someone, I can help you. I want to help you.”

  She smiled, but her chin trembled. “I’m fine. I’m not scared of anyone. I want to be your friend too. We’ll talk tomorrow.”

  Then she shut the door and hurried down the lane.

  Chapter Six

  I waited until she was out of sight, then backed up and headed to Hank’s. The roads were getting slippery, and the drive up the mountain toward White Rabbit Holler was treacherous in some spots. But I slowed to a crawl and drove carefully, relieved when Hank’s mailbox finally came into view.

  At least until I saw Wyatt’s truck parked out in front of the house.

  I parked the car, and Wyatt was out the front door before I reached the front porch.

  “I was about to go after you,” he said. “I worried that you might have run off the road. What took so long? I called Max and he said y’all left the bar almost an hour ago.”

  “What are you doin’ here?” I demanded.

  He looked taken back by my sharp tone. “I didn’t feel right about how we left things.”

  “You mean you didn’t like that I called you out on your bullshit.”

  He looked properly chastised. “Carly…”

  I shook my head. “No. No more excuses, Wyatt. If we’re really going to start a relationship, then we can’t have these big secrets between us.”

  “You don’t understand—”

  I held my hand up to stop him. “No, I don’t. And if that’s your only answer, then you should just leave.”

  I started to walk past him, but he wrapped an arm around me and tugged me back.

  “Carly.”

  My resolve began to weaken—his touch tended to do that to me—but I knew I had to stand firm. I couldn’t let my good sense be overruled by hormones. Pulling free from him, I said, “Let me go, Wyatt.”

  “Will you please let me explain?” he pleaded, sounding panicked.

  I put a hand on my hip. “Will your explanation include any of the answers I want?”

  “I want to talk about what happened between you and Bingham first.”

  He was changing the subject again, but I’d address this giant elephant before shifting back to the main topic. “It’s simple. Todd Bingham does what he wants, and he treats people like shit for fun.”

  “No,” he said. “Not always. I asked Lula and she told me his behavior in the tavern tonight was unusual. What did he want?”

  “Stop,” I said. “I’m not telling you anything else until you tell me something, Wyatt.”

  “Carly…”

  “You promised me,” I said, leaning in closer and lowering my voice. Sound carried out here. “You told me we’d bring them down. I want that. I need it. Now, are you going to tell me or not?”

  A war waged in his eyes, but I wasn’t sure if it was because he was trying to decide whether to start sharing or if he was preparing himself for a fight. “Not yet.”

  “Not yet,” I repeated. Was I being unreasonable? I was asking him to share his most intimate secrets. It had taken me two months to share my whole story with my friends from Arkansas. But my connection with Wyatt was deeper and more intimate. If he told the wrong person the things he knew about my past, I’d be murdered, and yet he refused to take me into his confidence.

  Be smart, Carly. Don’t let another man screw you over.

  I stared up at his emotionless face and took a step back, raising my hands in surrender. “You know what? I’ve had enough. I’m not doing this anymore. Until you’re willing to be more open with me, we’re done.”

  His eyes flew wide. “Carly!”

  He reached for me and I took another step back, needing distance from him so I could stand firm.

  “You know how hard it is for me to trust, especially after Jake.” My voice broke, and I couldn’t stop my tears. “He was my best friend for my entire life, and he betrayed me, Wyatt. Betrayed and destroyed me.”

  He shook his head, looking shell-shocked. “No. Not destroyed.”

  I released a bitter laugh. “Okay, he was saving that part until after he got a wedding ring on my finger.”

  “Carly…”

  “Give me something, Wyatt. Give me a reason other than the bogus excuse that you’re trying to protect me.” When he didn’t respond, I gasped from the burst of pain in my chest. “You don’t trust me,” I said, giving voice to the doubt that had been simmering below the surface for the past two weeks.

  “Carly, it’s just that—”

  I wasn’t sure what else he would have said because I walked past him into the house and shut the door, locking it before he tried to follow me inside.

  “Carly!” he shouted through the door. “Please let me explain.”

  I shook my head, even though he couldn’t see me. No. I was done letting people screw me over.

  “Carly!” he shouted again, banging on the door. He had a key, so he could open it at any time. Apparently he was respecting my boundaries, which softened my resolve. Some.

  Hank appeared in the hall, one crutch under his armpit and his rifle in the other hand. He wore a white T-shirt and a pair of blue pajama pants with the right pant leg cut off below his knee. His gray hair was smooshed on one side, and it hit me that I should take him to get a haircut when we were in Greeneville.

  “What the hell’s goin’ on?” he grumped. “Who’s out there?”

  “Wyatt,” I said, trying not to cry. “I’m sorry we woke you.”

  “Why’s he outside bangin’ on the door?”

  “I refused to talk to him and told him to leave.”

  Hank gave a sharp nod, then hobbled toward the door faster than one would have thought possible for a one-legged man. He jerked it open, and the relief on Wyatt’s face quickly turned to confusion.

  “She don’t wanna talk to you.”

  “Hank, if she would just—”

  “It’s damn near one in the morning,” Hank snapped. “She don’t wanna talk to you, Drummond, so go home.”

  But the ground beyond Wyatt was covered in snow, and I knew those roads were slippery. Even now, I didn’t like the thought of him driving on them.

  “If he doesn’t want to drive in the snow, he can sleep on the sofa,” I said in a firm voice. “But I’m goin’ to bed.”

  I didn’t wait to hear his answer, instead heading to my
room. Closing the door, I sat on the edge of the bed and started to cry, but it pissed me off. I’d started to let him into my heart after all, something I shouldn’t have done so easily.

  How could I have been so stupid again?

  I heard Wyatt’s truck roar to life, the sound fading as he drove away. Seconds later, a soft knock rapped on the door, and Hank said, “He’s gone.”

  “Thank you,” I said, hating that I’d let Hank be the one to run him off. Grateful that he’d taken my side without knowing any of the details.

  “You okay, girl?” he asked in a softer tone than I was used to from him.

  “No,” I said, a sob rising in my throat. “But I will be.”

  “Do I need to go kick Wyatt Drummond’s ass?”

  A laugh bubbled up, and I stood and opened the door. Hank was standing there with one crutch and no shotgun. “No,” I said with a watery smile. “I can handle him on my own.”

  “I know you can, girl,” he said, his voice turning gruff. “But just because you can doesn’t mean you have to do it alone. Say the word, and I’ll step in and have a go at him. You’re my family now.”

  To my horror, I started crying again. How had I been lucky enough to find him?

  I expected Hank to turn and run, but kindness filled his eyes. “Wyatt Drummond is a stubborn man who grew up with the belief that women should be protected. I learned different from my Mary, but his momma lives in his daddy’s shadow.”

  Which meant Hank had heard a lot of our conversation, not that I was surprised. The walls and doors in this house were thin.

  “Even after everything we went through together with Carson Purdy?” I asked in disbelief as I sat down on the bed. But my mind wandered back to Wyatt’s explanation for why he hadn’t jumped into my spat with Bingham. I knew Hank was reading this wrong. Wyatt wasn’t old-fashioned. He just didn’t trust me. “It doesn’t matter.”

  “Wyatt may be stubborn, but he’s a good man, Carly,” he said, hobbling back to the doorway.

  “What does that mean?” I asked. “What makes a good man?”

  “I sure as hell wouldn’t know,” Hank scoffed. “I definitely ain’t one.”

  I thought about Lula’s reaction to the news that I was staying with Hank. Had he been something like Bingham back in the day? He hadn’t hesitated to shoot the intruder who’d attacked me—one of Seth’s killers—but that had been self-defense. I had trouble seeing him hurting anyone for any other reason.