Regress (The Alliance Chronicles Book 1)

by SF Benson

  “Understood.”

  He swiveled his chair away from me. “It’s recommended you lay low for a few days.”

  “A few days? Why? There won’t be any more problems.”

  “If you can’t follow orders, you will be reassigned.”

  “Yes, sir.”

  “Dismissed.”

  Like I said…officially an idiot.

  I climbed the stairs two at a time. Thanks to my stupidity, I wouldn’t see Tru anytime soon. My superiors monitored all communication. No calls. No texts. I slammed the door to my room and plopped down on the king-sized bed.

  I had no one to blame but myself. I warned Tru about the always-present cameras, and then I pushed it too far. I should have stopped at the one kiss, held her hand. The surveillance cams would have bought it, but I wanted more. I’d been dying to kiss her from the moment I first saw her again. Hell, the way she kissed me back said she wanted it too.

  That night at the warehouse Tru figured I didn’t remember her. How could I forget the one girl who didn’t throw herself at me? Things seemed promising when we started dating. Then my mother passed and it took me a while to get over it. When I’d finally made peace with it, Tru disappeared. I tried calling her, but their number was disconnected. There wasn’t any way to find her.

  Tru wasn’t like the other girls. She was sweet and innocent, an anchor in an uncertain world. Being around her made my days and nights less miserable, less lonely. She helped me forget about the dangers surrounding me. I could…Damn! I forgot to ask her about that promise ceremony. I respected her wishes and didn’t follow her home. But I didn’t see a ring. Good sign. What if…I should have gone with her anyway. She belonged…

  Get a grip! Focus! There was too much at stake for me to screw up. I got my life back if I finished the mission. Completing it meant getting Tru’s help, though. Yes, she was a distraction. I spent four long years on my own, and the solitude almost killed me. That’s why I pushed things with her.

  I just needed to be careful. Too bad Tru didn’t learn anything useful at RMA. My supervisor would have been appeased, and I wouldn’t be confined to headquarters. With a little notice, I could have guided Tru’s search. But she insisted on going it alone. Tru was headstrong and too inquisitive. I liked those things about her, but her curiosity would get her killed or draw the attention of the CHA. Not a good idea with her birthday a week away.

  And why did she go to the learning center? She avoided the question. She didn’t need to be there on a Sunday. We had to solve our trust issues. Finishing the mission depended on it. Tru didn’t realize that she was the key to both our futures.

  “You with me or not? Tried to rewrite the spirit of God. Fear us, hear us, got to reload my rod…”

  —From Fight ‘til We Die by Mad Gauge, rapper, 2022

  Four days passed since our kiss, and I hadn’t heard from Zared. No phone calls. No texts. Was he repeating past behavior? This time, however, there’d be no forgiveness from me. I didn’t want or need a relationship with someone who couldn’t be bothered with common decency.

  I wanted to go back to the warehouse. See if he was still there. But with Ko at RMA, Mom and Dad expected me home on time. It tormented me not to see him. I felt like someone hid the pot of gold at the end of my rainbow.

  My longing for him amazed me. It had been five long years since I last saw him. I learned not to think about him. I stopped dreaming about him. And now, I couldn’t stop thinking about him or that amazing kiss.

  It astounded me that he would cease all contact. What if all this was just a game for him? I dismissed the idea but nothing else explained his absence. He might not need my help anymore. He wanted my trust, but then he disappeared. Not. Cool.

  At least nothing happened in his absence. Cris remained at home. Eden hadn’t returned. I hadn’t searched the apartment either. Furthermore, Mom still lied by omission. She avoided answering my questions. The more she evaded me, the more suspicious my mind grew.

  “Tru, did you hear me?”

  “What? Hey, Cris. How long have you been standing there?”

  “Not long. Got a minute?” Cris didn’t wait for an answer. I noticed the bags he left outside my door. “Mom tell you I’m leaving?”

  “She did.” I hoped he changed his mind. “But why?” I rolled to my side.

  “It's not safe here.” Cris leaned against the closed door with his arms crossed.

  “C'mon, Cris. It’s been a long time since this city was safe. Try telling me something I don’t know.”

  Cris rubbed his hands on his dirty jeans. “There's a lot you don't know.”

  I scrutinized my brother closely. I didn’t like what I saw. His clothes were rumpled. Dark circles were under his eyes. Pain, along with a little body funk, roared off him. “Tell me what’s going on, Cris.”

  “Don’t worry about it.”

  “Let me decide.” I wasn’t a friggin’ little kid in need of protection. Why weren’t people straight with me?

  “Tru—” Cris moved near the window.

  “Is this about Eden?”

  “Why would you ask that?”

  I lowered my voice. “I saw her.”

  Cris did a double take. “Eden? Where? When?”

  “At the Academy.”

  He narrowed his eyes. “What were you doing there?”

  I shrugged. “Visiting Ko.”

  “Did she see you?”

  “No.” I cocked my head. “Why would she be there?”

  “She’s not who you think she is.” Cris braced himself against the wall.

  I shifted my position. “Who is she then?”

  “Sh-she works with the government.”

  I gasped. “Why didn’t you tell us?”

  “I just found out myself. I’ve been suspicious for a while, but couldn’t prove anything.”

  “So what does she do?”

  “And there’s the problem. I still don’t know what she does. The fact that she hid that info from us proves she’s dangerous. Stay out of it.”

  “Too late.”

  Cris rubbed his brow. “What are you talking about?”

  “Tell me about the library of the truth and the key.”

  Cris’ eyes widened. “How the hell do you know about it?”

  I smirked. “I found the notebook.”

  “What the f—” Cris groaned. “Hand it over. You don’t know what you’re doing, Baby Girl. This isn’t a game.”

  “Nope. It’s mine now. Tell me about it. What does it all mean?”

  Cris looked away from me. “Tru, I said, stay out of it.”

  “I can’t, Cris.” I glared at him. “Tell me about ‘the one who finds her strength in Allah.’”

  He pounded the wall with his fist. “Leave it alone!”

  “C’mon, Cris. If I’m old enough for the vaccine, I’m old enough—”

  He grabbed me by the shoulders. “This is dangerous shit, Tru. People will get hurt.”

  “Explain.”

  “Never mind.” Cris’ shoulders slumped. “It’s time I left.”

  “No!” I jumped off the bed. “You can’t say stuff like that and leave me hanging.”

  “Yes, I can.” He brushed past me.

  I loved my brother something fierce. When we were kids, he fought my battles until I learned to fight for myself. And I could count on Cris whenever I needed someone. Who would have my back after he left? What would my life be like without him?

  I grabbed his forearm. “Cris, if you’re leaving because of Eden, don’t. She’s not worth it. Divorce—”

  He whirled around. “Do you think I’m leaving because of her?”

  “Well, yes.”

  Cris put his hands on top of his head. “This isn’t about her.”

  “Then tell me what it’s about.”

  He lowered his hands and fell onto the bed. “You’re safer if I don’t.”

  “Have you ever known me to take the safe route?”

  “No,” he
muttered. “But—”

  “Tell me,” I urged.

  “I promised to keep you safe.”

  “I’ll watch my own back.”

  He grabbed my hand and tangled his fingers with mine. I sat by him. “Promise me you’ll stop being so reckless.”

  “I’ll…” My stomach churned. How could I stop being me? I leaped without looking. I acted without thinking, most of the time. It wasn’t being reckless. It was being courageous with faults. Unperfected bravery.

  “Be mindful of whom you trust,” he said.

  Um… a little too late. Cris noticed me fidgeting with my pillowcase.

  “What have you done, Tru?”

  “Nothing,” I whispered.

  “Then who is he?” he begged.

  My cheeks felt hot. “What makes you think there’s someone?”

  Cris squeezed my hand. “Who is he?”

  I tried to remove my hand, but Cris held it tight. “No one in particular.”

  “Got a name?” He scowled.

  “Zared.”

  Cris didn’t speak for a minute. “Not that kid you hung out with back in New Palmer Woods?”

  “Yeah. Why?”

  He shook it off. “The kid was bad news back then. I’m sure nothing’s changed. I don’t want some guy breaking your heart.”

  “Fine.” Talk about odd. Cris sounded sad, not pissed. “People change.”

  “Humph. Once a player, always a player. Don’t trust this guy with too much either.”

  “What are you getting at?” I bit my lower lip.

  “Listen for once.”

  “Okay, okay.” I put up my hands. “I got it. Stop being so reckless and don’t trust anyone including Zared.”

  “Don’t forget,” he said sharply.

  “I won’t.” Why couldn’t I trust him? “Where are you going?”

  “Canada. Once I’m settled I'll help you get out.”

  “Get out?” My heart raced. “When did I become a prisoner?”

  “We're all prisoners as long as we live in the AR.”

  “What about Mom and Dad?”

  “They can take care of themselves.” Cris tapped my knee. “I’m concerned about you right now.”

  “Why?”

  Cris hugged me. “Because I won’t be here to take care of you.”

  He avoided giving me real answers like everyone else. “Is this about Mom and why we moved here?”

  “How do you know about…?”

  “Doesn’t matter. I still have lots of questions which no one, including you will answer.”

  Cris reached into his front pocket and pulled out a black SIM card reader. He stared at it for a minute and held it up. “You shouldn’t have this. I swore I’d keep it safe. But it’s not fair keeping you in the dark.”

  “What is it?”

  “The key. Be sure you’re alone when you access it. I mean one hundred percent alone, Tru. Understood?”

  “Yes.” I trembled with excitement. Finally, some answers. I might even learn about Intrepid.

  “It will change your life. Hell, it might even endanger it. Is getting answers important enough to risk your life?”

  “You said I shouldn’t be in the dark.”

  “I know what I said.” He closed his eyes. “I don’t want you hurt or worse. I’d never forgive myself.”

  “I’ll be fine. I promise I’ll keep it safe.”

  “No. This is a bad idea.” He pocketed the reader and headed for the door.

  No, no, no. He couldn’t leave without giving me the card. If it contained answers, I needed it. If it contained proof of Intrepid, Zared needed it too. “Cris, wait!”

  “What?”

  “It’ll be fine. I’ll keep it safe. Are you doing me a favor keeping me in the dark?”

  His brow furrowed. “Whatever you do, don’t let Mom know about it.” He held the reader before my face like a carrot.

  “Why?” I raised an eyebrow.

  “Tru, for once in your life, follow directions. If you can’t, you’re not ready—”

  “I understand.” I held my hand out.

  He jerked it away. “And please, don't tell anyone where I've gone.”

  “I won’t.” I reached for the card. He hesitated and then gave it up.

  We hugged. Something said this was a permanent goodbye. The thought chilled me. My heart began to ache.

  “I love you, big bro.”

  “And I, you, Baby Girl.” Cris kissed the top of my head.

  And then, my brother was out of my life. He took a piece of me I’d never replace. If things went awry…If that was our last goodbye, how would I go on without him? I stared at the reader in my hand. If Cris were right, would I trade my life for answers? I’d never know without accessing the card.

  Thou shall not be a witness to any traitorous act and not report it.

  —10 Commandments of Personal Conduct, Thaxton Bible, 2021

  The question remained how to access the card at home. My grid-phobic parents felt even a handheld reader was intrusive. Far too many nosy teachers and students were at the learning center. Dad’s tablet! Sometimes he worked from home on a tablet. Perhaps he’d let me borrow it.

  My parents were talking in their bedroom. Just talking. No arguing. Were they aware Cris left? I dried my eyes before entering the room.

  “Hey, Mom and Dad.”

  “Hey, Tru,” replied Mom. She sounded upbeat, but it didn’t match her eyes. A shadow of pain hung there. I swallowed back a sob.

  “Dad, are you finished working?”

  He stroked his beard. “I've worked enough today. It’s family time. What would you like to do?”

  Family time sounded wonderful. It seemed like forever since we did anything meaningful together. Once upon a time, we watched streaming movies every week. When was our last movie night? An invisible hand squeezed my heart. It was a memory soft as a feather and faint as sleep. Fleeting. Good times were a rarity.

  “It sounds great, but I have an assignment due. Maybe later? Can I borrow your tablet?”

  “Sure.” Dad handed me the device. Mom pursed her lips and fiddled with her necklace again. She knew Cris left while Dad ignored it.

  “Thanks, Dad.”

  I took the tablet up on the roof, my private mecca. I stepped over the rubble and trash. Sometimes I’d looked over the edge and imagined the city before the Street Wars destroyed it. Green spaces. Solid buildings. Streets bustling with traffic. Music blaring from open car windows. People. People walking. People running. I sniffed. It was all gone now.

  I crouched in a corner, switched on the tablet, and inserted the card. First roadblock. The screen required a password. My second roadblock came with a familiar electronic buzzing. A drone headed in my direction. Wasn’t it too early for patrols? I removed the card, placed it in the reader, and shoved it in my jeans pocket before shutting off the tablet. A quick glance over my shoulder and I ran for the stairwell. Surprisingly the drone changed its course.

  I leaned against the dirty wall and inhaled the stale air. Mom and Dad would wonder why I came back so soon. I removed the band from my ponytail and ripped my shirt. Thinking about Cris helped me work up some tears for my award-winning performance.

  “Mom! Dad!” I shouted as I burst into the apartment.

  Mom rushed to my side. “What happened?”

  “M-man attacked me on the roof!” I collapsed against Mom. A smile threatened the corners of my mouth. ‘And the award goes to…’

  “Did he do anything?” Dad entered the room. “What did he look like? Where's the tablet?” I pulled it out of my bag.

  Mom smoothed my hair. “Are you alright?”

  “Yes,” I exhaled, thinking I might have overdone it a bit.

  Dad paced the floor. “How many times have I said to stay off the roof?”

  “I know, Dad. I—”

  “Stop talking and listen!” Dad stopped in front of me his hands clenched. “Do you realize how dangerous—”

&n
bsp; “Enough, Fred!” Mom faced him. “We don't need this right now."

  Wow! I’d never heard Mom raise her voice at Dad. “I'm sorry, Dad. You’re right.”

  They exchanged looks, and Dad left the room. She silenced him again. I should have been more concerned about the tension between my parents instead of the SIM card. But I didn’t always do what I should. Mom led me over to the sofa. “Are you okay?”

  I swallowed. “I'm fine. More embarrassed than anything.”

  “Nonsense. You have nothing to be embarrassed about. Something terrible could have happened to you tonight. You may think your dad is wrong about things, but not this time. No more going off by yourself at night. This city isn't safe. This world isn’t safe anymore.”

  “I get it, Mom.” I stared at my lap.

  She lifted my chin. “Do you? Your safety is not guaranteed, minha filha. There are those who serve two masters. Not everyone can be trusted. There is nothing guaranteed in the life we live. Nothing! Do you understand what I’m telling you?”

  “Yes, Mom.” Wait! Did she say those who serve two masters? The phrase… My heart sank.

  “This behavior of yours will stop. You’re taking dumb risks with your life.”

  “Okay.” I lowered my eyes. “I’m going to bed.”

  “Good idea.” Mom rose. “Don’t worry. I'll speak with your dad. Good night.”

  I flopped on my bed and contemplated my parents’ reactions. Dad’s anger? Expected. Mom agreeing with him? Shocking. Tonight was the second time she didn’t refute what he said. I don’t know when it happened, but something changed between us. I no longer recognized my life. My family had never kept secrets. Yes, I was guilty of a few harmless fabrications enabling me to hang out in the Underground or score some new art supplies. Now, it seemed everyone had a secret. I didn’t like it at all.

  Before the drone’s unexpected arrival, I thought I was close to finding answers. Instead, I got a new batch of questions. Why did it hover over our building? Did the card trigger an alert? What did it mean? No time to figure it out. I knew two things—I needed a password and a plan.

  One person could help me, but he fell off my radar. Unfortunately, I needed him. So I took my heart out of the equation, pulled my phone out, and sent him a text: